Family comes for a visit... (1 Viewer)

[IC FBGCav]

I think it depends on your family. I can say that I'd welcome any of my family members for an unlimited time. But if someone said they couldn't stand having their family there for more than a weekend, I couldn't blame them because I don't know how tight their family is.

Theoretically?

I should add at an earlier time (late 80s / early 90s) I bailed my two oldest siblings out of a couple jams they got themselves into. I was single and they were irresponsible. Paid for my brother's UHaul and travel expenses to move back from Colorado after he bottomed out. Couple years earlier I helped my sister (divorced mom of 5) get out from under a mountain of debt. Never got paid back from either, and never will. They also knew not to ask me for any more favors. We get along just fine, but that was enough bull#### for one lifetime. To their credit they got their #### together after that.

This is why I say it depends on your family.

So your statement about unlimited time is still a theory and you've never had to test it?

This past summer, my parents stayed with us for 3 weeks. My brother and his wife have stayed with us for 2 weeks plenty of times. My fiances brother and wife stayed with us for 6 weeks when they were waiting on their house to be finished. At no point did I wish any of them would leave. I've said in the past, family is very important to me. I would do anything for them. But they are good people.

I am guessing they are respectful and know how to be guests in someone elses home. Some people just don't know how to do this.

 

[TheIronSheik]

I think it depends on your family. I can say that I'd welcome any of my family members for an unlimited time. But if someone said they couldn't stand having their family there for more than a weekend, I couldn't blame them because I don't know how tight their family is.

Theoretically?

I should add at an earlier time (late 80s / early 90s) I bailed my two oldest siblings out of a couple jams they got themselves into. I was single and they were irresponsible. Paid for my brother's UHaul and travel expenses to move back from Colorado after he bottomed out. Couple years earlier I helped my sister (divorced mom of 5) get out from under a mountain of debt. Never got paid back from either, and never will. They also knew not to ask me for any more favors. We get along just fine, but that was enough bull#### for one lifetime. To their credit they got their #### together after that.

This is why I say it depends on your family.

So your statement about unlimited time is still a theory and you've never had to test it?

This past summer, my parents stayed with us for 3 weeks. My brother and his wife have stayed with us for 2 weeks plenty of times. My fiances brother and wife stayed with us for 6 weeks when they were waiting on their house to be finished. At no point did I wish any of them would leave. I've said in the past, family is very important to me. I would do anything for them. But they are good people.

I am guessing they are respectful and know how to be guests in someone elses home. Some people just don't know how to do this.

Exactly. And that was my original point. It all depends on who your family is.

 

[Ditkaless Wonders]

72 hour rule. Any longer then get a hotel, and make sure to break the visit up with days doing things than being together at all. They can visit a friend in the area, take a side trip nearby, something.

Exception to the rule for Grandmothers visiting a new baby and helping out, but only if they are not obnoxious.

 

[Bull Dozier]

I've lived in Manhattan in 16 years. Everyone wants to visit. No problem, but if you're staying, it's a three night limit. The only exception I've ever made is for mom (R.I.P.) Sisters, brother, nieces/nephews, best friend of 40+ years - the rule is three nights. Love ya, love seeing ya, get a ####### hotel room, AirBNB, whatever -that's not my problem. Don't try to make your problem my problem.

A lot of people (family) have gotten pissed off about that. Guess what - they get over it.

Now, granted, all of my family lives in town still, and I only visited family as a kid, but I can't imagine this. If I was going to visit family out of town, if I was going to stay more than a few nights, I would think it would be an imposition unless they had a mansion with several spare bedrooms. I'd just get a hotel. The longer the planned stay, the bigger the imposition. The shorter the stay, the easier it is to get a hotel. Both short and long stays lead me to think just getting a hotel is the right route.

Who has three weeks off where they can travel and want to spend it all with family?

Teachers?

I suppose that explains the first part of my question. I think the second part depends on the family. A family like Sheik's maybe. My own family? No chance.

 

[Spike]

Only one person mentioned what I feel is a very pertinent question - while the visitors are staying with you, how much time are they spending with you?

 

[RUSF18]

72 hour rule. Any longer then get a hotel, and make sure to break the visit up with days doing things than being together at all. They can visit a friend in the area, take a side trip nearby, something.

Exception to the rule for Grandmothers visiting a new baby and helping out, but only if they are not obnoxious.

All babies are obnoxious.

 

[Ditka Butkus]

72 hour rule. Any longer then get a hotel, and make sure to break the visit up with days doing things than being together at all. They can visit a friend in the area, take a side trip nearby, something.

Exception to the rule for Grandmothers visiting a new baby and helping out, but only if they are not obnoxious.

All babies are obnoxious.

Finally somebody said it.

 

[sbonomo]

72 hour rule. Any longer then get a hotel, and make sure to break the visit up with days doing things than being together at all. They can visit a friend in the area, take a side trip nearby, something.

Exception to the rule for Grandmothers visiting a new baby and helping out, but only if they are not obnoxious.

All babies are obnoxious.

Finally somebody said it.

72 hour rule. Any longer then get a hotel, and make sure to break the visit up with days doing things than being together at all. They can visit a friend in the area, take a side trip nearby, something.

Exception to the rule for Grandmothers visiting a new baby and helping out, but only if they are not obnoxious.

All babies are obnoxious.

My parents (retired, go to bed early, cook great food) a few weeks. The Wifes family - which inlcudes kids - one week.

 

[elbowrm]

If you want to score points you can livs off of for at least six months, suck it up and be the most pleasant, helpful guy in the world for just one more week. Cook dinner. Engage the visitors in conversation. Ask if they want to come with you to go to the mall, etc. act like it's the most natural thing in the world and don't pat yourself on the back with your wife. it's guaranteed to be worth it after they leave.

 

[matuski]

If you want to score points you can livs off of for at least six months, suck it up and be the most pleasant, helpful guy in the world for just one more week. Cook dinner. Engage the visitors in conversation. Ask if they want to come with you to go to the mall, etc. act like it's the most natural thing in the world and don't pat yourself on the back with your wife. it's guaranteed to be worth it after they leave.

Worst post ever.

 

[McGarnicle]

If you want to score points you can livs off of for at least six months, suck it up and be the most pleasant, helpful guy in the world for just one more week. Cook dinner. Engage the visitors in conversation. Ask if they want to come with you to go to the mall, etc. act like it's the most natural thing in the world and don't pat yourself on the back with your wife. it's guaranteed to be worth it after they leave.

I've been doing something similar -- sitting and staring at the TV with an angry look on my face and taking every opportunity to remind my wife how crazy her sister is and I wish she would leave already and offering to pay whatever change fees are required to get her on a plane tomorrow morning.

 

[Johnny Rock]

I've lived in Manhattan in 16 years. Everyone wants to visit. No problem, but if you're staying, it's a three night limit.

It's nice to know I have a place to stay for three nights if I'm in Manhattan.

 

[RUSF18]

I've lived in Manhattan in 16 years. Everyone wants to visit. No problem, but if you're staying, it's a three night limit.

It's nice to know I have a place to stay for three nights if I'm in Manhattan.

He didn't mention when the clock restarts. So I think you're good for a week with a night in a hotel thrown into the middle.

 

[Johnny Rock]

I've lived in Manhattan in 16 years. Everyone wants to visit. No problem, but if you're staying, it's a three night limit.

It's nice to know I have a place to stay for three nights if I'm in Manhattan.

He didn't mention when the clock restarts. So I think you're good for a week with a night in a hotel thrown into the middle.

Good point. I'll extend my flight.

 

[TheIronSheik]

If you want to score points you can livs off of for at least six months, suck it up and be the most pleasant, helpful guy in the world for just one more week. Cook dinner. Engage the visitors in conversation. Ask if they want to come with you to go to the mall, etc. act like it's the most natural thing in the world and don't pat yourself on the back with your wife. it's guaranteed to be worth it after they leave.

It's like the old saying: "Kill them with kind of being nice."

 

[gianmarco]

I've lived in Manhattan in 16 years. Everyone wants to visit. No problem, but if you're staying, it's a three night limit.

It's nice to know I have a place to stay for three nights if I'm in Manhattan.

This would be great shtick if everyone here asks to stay with BL everytime they visit NYC.

 

[BobbyLayne]

Thinking about listing the roof deck on Airbnb

 

[msommer]

Thinking about listing the roof deck on Airbnb

Put up a hammock and you're good!

 

[msommer]

I've had MIL (who I detest) stay for over a month.

My wife is aware of my issues with her mom so she generally schedules the visits for when I am travelling extensively.

Last year I was out 100% of the time and looks like this year 100% too

 

[McGarnicle]

Day 24, SIL has left the premises. The long, bitter, sad ordeal is over. I feel bad about trashing her so much because I learned she's in genuine need of help and completely in denial. The family just lost another sibling to suicide last June and they don't need another one going off the reservation. But that event has really set this sister off in a bad way. I've never been around anyone so screwed up.