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Funny things your kid has said (3 Viewers)

El Floppo said:
(posted this elsewhere since I was too lazy to find this thread... but here goes for round 2).

3yo Floppinha has taken to saying "whobody" lately. "whobody ate my cupcake!" match that with this face, and welcome to just how tightly wrapped around her little finger she has me.

7yo Floppinho, out of the blue marched into our room and said to my wife- "stop wasting my potential"- and then marched back out. he's older, and not as cute, so screw him.
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thank god my daughter is still saying "whobody".

3 and 7 are pretty great ages for my kids... I'm sure they'll continue to be great as they age, but I'd love to hang onto what we've got this year.

 
The other day a fire fighter friend of ours was telling us a story about one of the guys in his unit that has tourette's syndrome. It was pretty funny at the start but then kind of petered off at the end. Right after he finishes Kanil Jr. (3.5yo) drops a "Cool story bro" on him. Perfect timing and delivery. This kid is a genius.

 
My 5 yr old finally dropped an f bomb. Surprised it took this long actually. I asked him what he said and he said frog.

You did say frog alert

 
So Kanil Jr. (3.5yo) disappears for a few minutes and is suspiciously quiet. That's normally not a good sign. I call his name and hear a muffled reply that I cant understand. I pause the Broncos game and go to find him. He's in the bathroom with the door shut which is odd because he never closes the door. I ask him what he's doing and he says "I don't want anyone to smell my stinky poop".

 
Tonight my oldest son said, "Dad there is a winter storm warning for CHA ROW KEY county!" I had to tell him it was Cherokee county.

 
Went to buy some gloves for a Christmas giving tree thing at my kids school and my son said he didn't want to do it bc his heart would burst from the joy of giving.

My daughter is currently responding to everything by saying 'butt pudding'.

 
bushdocda said:
Went to buy some gloves for a Christmas giving tree thing at my kids school and my son said he didn't want to do it bc his heart would burst from the joy of giving.

My daughter is currently responding to everything by saying 'butt pudding'.
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Even if you ask her what she wants for dessert?

 
bushdocda said:
Went to buy some gloves for a Christmas giving tree thing at my kids school and my son said he didn't want to do it bc his heart would burst from the joy of giving.

My daughter is currently responding to everything by saying 'butt pudding'.
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"butt" is pretty much all that's coming out of both kids mouths these days.

butt pudding is ####### awesome :lol:

 
El Floppo said:
We had some friends over the other night...my 3yo daughter runs into the Living Room-

- I WANT DADDY'S NUTS!

- {{guests... :unsure: }}

- I want daddy's nuts NOW! (remembering to be polite)... Please? Daddy's BIG NUTS!

She has started calling almonds "daddy's nuts". Big nuts= the type I usually get versus another brand.

--------------------------

She also has started running to get us, with an uncomfortable look on her face...

- My underwear is too spicy.

I still have no idea what this means. Wife thinks it might mean that she has a wedgey.
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At the supermarket yesterday on a busy Sunday afternoon...

"I WANT DADDY'S NUTS!!!"

me- looking around :oldunsure:

"I LOOOOOVE DADDY'S BIG NUTS!!!""

her remembering something.. "I'll wait until home to eat DADDY'S BIG NUTS!!!"

:bag: :bag :bag:

 
Watching the football game tonight and my 7 yr old says to me:

"Your mom's so stupid she sold her car for gas money"

I tried to tell him that is not nice, but I couldn't stop laughing.

 
My seven year old son is starting to like basketball. We've watched most Cavs games this year. After Charlotte cut the lead to two after being down 21-0, my son says, "What the hell are they doing?" No clue where he possibly could of heard that. Ha

Regaurding the last few posts. My kids (also have a daughter who will be five next week), love saying butt and poop. Seems every day I'm saying stop saying butt.

 
I got home last night and both kids were saying nothing but butt.

It was like the Smurfs, except if it was called the Butts. And withoutthe blue.

 
In one of my more brilliant fathering moments, I decided to teach my boys (6 & 8) how to drop SBD's and crop dust. Its so hard to not teach them this stuff when they're nearly pissing their pants in laughter when you describe this stuff.

So my 6yr old (Kindergarten) is eating dinner and says "oh Daddy, guess what?!?!? I made a SBD in the cafeteria at lunch today!" It was so hard to not fall over laughing, but I had to tell him about not farting at meals. "do you want your food to taste like poop because Carlos farted next to you?" The look of shock on his face was awesome.

 
My wife and I went on a cruise last week and grandma came to watch KanilJr (3.5) while we were gone. This is the conversation the first night:

*Commercial comes on for Egg Nog*

Son: Can I have some egg nog?

Gma: I don't think we have any.

Son: Can I go look?

Gma: Sure.

KanilJr opens the refrigerator, keeps one hand on the door, the other on his hip and after about 10 seconds realizes there is no egg nog....

Son: Damn it!

Gma: What did you say?

Son: DAMN IT!

As soon as Gma thought she could hold it together she sat him down for a serious conversation about damn being a potty word.

The best part is he threw Mrs. Kanil under the bus saying "Mommy says it!" as part of his defense.

 
I was driving and my 6 year old asked if she could have some of my soda. Not much left so I said yes.

Then I hear "There is God!"

Terrifying thoughts go through my head "How did she hear about God? Who's been talking to her about this stuff?"

So I ask her to repeat herself and she says "There it's gone!"

Whew.

 
Guy I work with brought in his two kids today. Boy and a girl, probably about 4 and 5 years old. For the most part they were being pretty good, all things considered. But he did have to tell them a couple of times not to be so loud. Well, we work next to a fire department, and as they were getting loud, the siren went off next door. And it is loud! They both looked stunned and the boy asked, "What's that siren for?" My coworker said, "You guys must have been too loud. Now the police are coming to talk to you guys." The boy looked terrified and started to hide under the desk, all while his eyes bulged out of his head in fear.

The little girl said, "Dad, do you think there's a reward for him?"

:lol:

Freakin' #####es, man.

 
10 year old: Daddy how many days are in a year on Mars?

Me: I'm not sure, but I think it's about 630 (I checked later, and it's 687 so I was close )

Him: How many seconds is that?

Me: :oldunsure:

 
Overheard while the kids were upstairs :

7 year old "Ew! Mitchell, wouldn't this be a terrible pet?"

10 year old : "Bradley, you should go show him to daddy."

At this point I start getting concerned and head upstairs

7 year old: "No, I'm just gonna drown him."

Water starts running.

I move a little faster.

I get upstairs and ask what he's doing. Turns out he caught........... A stinkbug.

 
My sister decides to tell my nephew that Santa is make believe and something we just do for fun etc.... His response: "but how does he get inside since we don't have a chimney"

 
My 4 year old niece broke her foot as she jumped off the couch and missed the bean bag. When the doctor asked her what she learned from this, she said, "next time move the bean bag closer."

 
So, every year my wife does this video thing online where Santa sends a video to each kid to let them know if they are on the naughty or nice list. It comes personalized with their name and photos, so really believable for a kid. I have a 9 year old son, 7 year old son, and 4 year old daughter. Anyway, the 9 year old wants to go first, because he's been worried this year.

He gets his video, and of course he's on the nice list and is excited. Here's the conversation between my wife and 7 year old son:

Wife: Were you worried that you were on the naughty list?

7 year old: Nah. Once I saw my brother made it I knew I was good.

 
ChiefD said:
So, every year my wife does this video thing online where Santa sends a video to each kid to let them know if they are on the naughty or nice list. It comes personalized with their name and photos, so really believable for a kid. I have a 9 year old son, 7 year old son, and 4 year old daughter. Anyway, the 9 year old wants to go first, because he's been worried this year.

He gets his video, and of course he's on the nice list and is excited. Here's the conversation between my wife and 7 year old son:

Wife: Were you worried that you were on the naughty list?

7 year old: Nah. Once I saw my brother made it I knew I was good.
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:lmao:

 
On NYE my five year old was eating alot of chips. His uncle said to him, calm down youre gonna explode. Well apparently this was the first time he ever heard this expression and I guess hes related to Drax because he took it literally and spent the next half hour crying thinking he was going to really explode.

 
mr roboto said:
Prince Myshkin said:
my little girl had a "disastrophe" the other day.

i really think that should be a word...
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lol that's really cute. I combine words and my 4 year girl old loves it but it drives her older sister (6) crazy. They go to 'gymtastics' class.
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Yeah...she also used to "trapture" things sometimes when playing. Found this for Christmas last year and my wife burst into tears (in a good way) when she opened it.

 
Wife playing a rhyming game with my 4 year old daughter and 2 year old son

Daughter: wick and t i t

Not sure where she's even heard that word.

Son:(insert any word) and poop....over and over and over

 
At the dinner table tonight:

12 yo daughter: It costs two cents to make a penny. Why don't they stop making pennies?

10 yo daughter: Yeah, why don't they start making pennies out of bark?

12 yo daughter: Then we can say that money DOES grow on trees!

 
Our 6yr old son is getting ready for bed and yells out from the bathroom "why did my underwear make Chinese signs on my body?!?!?". Shuked, I come in to investigate and he shows me the marks left around his waiste from the elastic band on his superman undies.

 
Bob Goblin: what does "P-O-P C-O-R-N" mean.

3yo Son: Popcorn!

Me: (having missed the visual on the TV) How did you know that?

3yo Son: I'm very clever.

 
Mr. Ham said:
Sometimes it just takes a word. I was playing Super Mario Smash on Saturday with my 4 year old. We spent about an hour learning to play and were starting to get the hang. At one point I tried to jump around his character and do a special smash move, which he anticipated and countered, sending my character flying into the stratosphere with a flashing contrail and a scream.

He barely reacted, except for a barely audible, "Nope."
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Ahaha... awesome.

I feel like THIS might be your son's future.

 
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