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GM's Thread About Everything/GM's Thread About Nothing (25 Viewers)

Good luck, GM and DA Raiders. And to think I was going to ##### about the stupid minimart gas pumps not giving me my .20-per-gallon Vons/Safeway discount this morning.

 
Say, you guys want to feel a little better about yourselves this morning? I know you do! Sit back and take a little spin in my shoes in what I'm calling "The Week of Woe".

- Monday: Not sure if our little town of weird has made national news for the torrential downpours and flooding that is now killing people who suffer from hubris and think their little eco-friendly roller skate cars can plough through the standing high water that's littering our roads now, but Portland is getting abused by rain which has not only flooded my back yard, but is now causing a neat little leak around my chimney that's penetrating all the way down to our basement and will cost $1,500 to fix. Merry ####### Xmas to me. That was how my morning began. Work's been a dumpster fire the last few months with dismal performance, redemptions and talk of shutting it all down. So after a nasty day at the office where my stress level was elevated to 11, I hopped in my car, hoping to race home and find the warm embrace of my loving wife and family booze. One little problem. The highway I take home every day which is clogged like John Madden's arteries (too soon?) on a good day was a virtual parking lot. Why? Because ODOT shut down the highway due to high water and was forcing cars to exit. Did I learn this from traffic reports on the radio or those worthless ####### electric signs that tell us to slow down or use caution stop masturbating? No. I had to rely on Twitter and some cunning short-cut navigation through neighborhoods along with every other wiseacre who was doing the same. 90 minutes after leaving the office which is 12 miles from my house, I was home. Home where I learned my son had clogged a toilet with TP & turds, so with screaming twin infant in one arm and a plunger in the other, I plunged the mess away. Hey at least the MNF game was on and that would be fun to watch, especially since I had the Redskins -3 in a virtual lock at home against a hapless Cowboys' team that can't move the ball without Romo. :mellow:

- Tuesday: Nothing out of the ordinary, maybe things have turned around? Work sucked, but my commute home wasn't bad. I even got to make a giant pot of turkey stock with the leftover carcass, which I roasted before throwing into a stock pot, creating a wonderful smelling, deliciously rich turkey stock which I'll use for soups and jambalaya and gumbo and maybe I'll bathe in it, who knows? So much stock was made that I ran out of Tupperware containers and, thinking outside the box, located my giant thermos and patted myself on the back filling it to the brim, shutting the lid on tight and putting it in the fridge for future use this week. Went on to make Mexican Turkey soup that night, enough for the work week and hey, lookie there, life is back on track!

- Wednesday: Greeted at the office by my CFO and boss who let me know the CFO screwed up last month overpaying two limited partners who redeemed in full by a total of $25,000. Every hedge fund I've ever known or been a part of pays 90% of their redemption requests leaving a 10% holdback so the auditors can do their thing and ensure there are no errors. But not our hedge fund, no....our CFO prides himself on his impeccable work, after all, he DID go to Dartmouth! Only this time, he screwed up and over paid two partners, one a half drunk crazy Pollock who is losing his assssssssss off with businesses in Russia. The other a Korean who gives me a headache every time I talk to him, not for his poor English, but for his poor understanding of anything and incessant need to ask the same question over and over. How he made his wealth, I have no idea, but guess who was tasked with recovering this money? Oh, and recourse? LOOLLLLOOOO! Oh well, at least my boss really liked our stylistic Xmas cards that I ordered from Vista Print, only you can't say Xmas anymore, so the sleek black modern design with a white Xmas tree and our flashy new corporate logo that I put on there looked really good and he said so, only he paused and said "Wait a minute? Did you see this? They spelled 'Happy Holidays' with two LLs! We can't send out cards that say 'Happy Hollidays!' How did they screw this up?" :oldunsure: He could tell from my sheepish reply and face discoloration that it wasn't Vista Print that screwed up; it was poor spelling, dim witted, worthless corporate waste that is General Malaise who butchered the spelling on our company holiday cards. :bag:

- Today: You remember the back-patting smart mofo who thought outside the box and used his giant thermos to house the rest of his turkey stock that he made on Tuesday? Yeah, here's a pro-tip for you amateur chefs out there - when you are making a stock or anything really and you plan on putting in the fridge for later use, let it cool down before putting the contents under pressure in, say, a giant thermos. As I walked downstairs this morning, ready to go into the office, I heard two crying infants and one braying 3 year old shouting for her mother. Her mother, the most patient, calm woman in the world was shouting back to her that she was busy! Busy? Busy with what? Oh....right. The vegetarian wife of the dumbest dildo on the planet was emptying the entire fridge because everything was covered in rich, delicious turkey stock, including her veggies and fruits and, well...it was straight out of a scene from the movie Seven absent the head in the box, though there's no guarantee mine won't be shipped UPS later today when she realizes that smell is harder to get rid of then a house infested with farts.

TL;DR I'm a barely functional assssss clown who really has no business breeding.
Oh my. Sorry GM. It sounds horrible but it made me laugh. Is that wrong?
No no, not wrong at all. I'm here to make everybody else feel better about themselves. Hell, show your wives, let them realize it could be soooooooooooo much worse.
If it makes you feel better, failing to cool the stock before sealing and refrigerating it could have gone much, much worse.

 
Say, you guys want to feel a little better about yourselves this morning? I know you do! Sit back and take a little spin in my shoes in what I'm calling "The Week of Woe".

- Monday: Not sure if our little town of weird has made national news for the torrential downpours and flooding that is now killing people who suffer from hubris and think their little eco-friendly roller skate cars can plough through the standing high water that's littering our roads now, but Portland is getting abused by rain which has not only flooded my back yard, but is now causing a neat little leak around my chimney that's penetrating all the way down to our basement and will cost $1,500 to fix. Merry ####### Xmas to me. That was how my morning began. Work's been a dumpster fire the last few months with dismal performance, redemptions and talk of shutting it all down. So after a nasty day at the office where my stress level was elevated to 11, I hopped in my car, hoping to race home and find the warm embrace of my loving wife and family booze. One little problem. The highway I take home every day which is clogged like John Madden's arteries (too soon?) on a good day was a virtual parking lot. Why? Because ODOT shut down the highway due to high water and was forcing cars to exit. Did I learn this from traffic reports on the radio or those worthless ####### electric signs that tell us to slow down or use caution stop masturbating? No. I had to rely on Twitter and some cunning short-cut navigation through neighborhoods along with every other wiseacre who was doing the same. 90 minutes after leaving the office which is 12 miles from my house, I was home. Home where I learned my son had clogged a toilet with TP & turds, so with screaming twin infant in one arm and a plunger in the other, I plunged the mess away. Hey at least the MNF game was on and that would be fun to watch, especially since I had the Redskins -3 in a virtual lock at home against a hapless Cowboys' team that can't move the ball without Romo. :mellow:

- Tuesday: Nothing out of the ordinary, maybe things have turned around? Work sucked, but my commute home wasn't bad. I even got to make a giant pot of turkey stock with the leftover carcass, which I roasted before throwing into a stock pot, creating a wonderful smelling, deliciously rich turkey stock which I'll use for soups and jambalaya and gumbo and maybe I'll bathe in it, who knows? So much stock was made that I ran out of Tupperware containers and, thinking outside the box, located my giant thermos and patted myself on the back filling it to the brim, shutting the lid on tight and putting it in the fridge for future use this week. Went on to make Mexican Turkey soup that night, enough for the work week and hey, lookie there, life is back on track!

- Wednesday: Greeted at the office by my CFO and boss who let me know the CFO screwed up last month overpaying two limited partners who redeemed in full by a total of $25,000. Every hedge fund I've ever known or been a part of pays 90% of their redemption requests leaving a 10% holdback so the auditors can do their thing and ensure there are no errors. But not our hedge fund, no....our CFO prides himself on his impeccable work, after all, he DID go to Dartmouth! Only this time, he screwed up and over paid two partners, one a half drunk crazy Pollock who is losing his assssssssss off with businesses in Russia. The other a Korean who gives me a headache every time I talk to him, not for his poor English, but for his poor understanding of anything and incessant need to ask the same question over and over. How he made his wealth, I have no idea, but guess who was tasked with recovering this money? Oh, and recourse? LOOLLLLOOOO! Oh well, at least my boss really liked our stylistic Xmas cards that I ordered from Vista Print, only you can't say Xmas anymore, so the sleek black modern design with a white Xmas tree and our flashy new corporate logo that I put on there looked really good and he said so, only he paused and said "Wait a minute? Did you see this? They spelled 'Happy Holidays' with two LLs! We can't send out cards that say 'Happy Hollidays!' How did they screw this up?" :oldunsure: He could tell from my sheepish reply and face discoloration that it wasn't Vista Print that screwed up; it was poor spelling, dim witted, worthless corporate waste that is General Malaise who butchered the spelling on our company holiday cards. :bag:

- Today: You remember the back-patting smart mofo who thought outside the box and used his giant thermos to house the rest of his turkey stock that he made on Tuesday? Yeah, here's a pro-tip for you amateur chefs out there - when you are making a stock or anything really and you plan on putting in the fridge for later use, let it cool down before putting the contents under pressure in, say, a giant thermos. As I walked downstairs this morning, ready to go into the office, I heard two crying infants and one braying 3 year old shouting for her mother. Her mother, the most patient, calm woman in the world was shouting back to her that she was busy! Busy? Busy with what? Oh....right. The vegetarian wife of the dumbest dildo on the planet was emptying the entire fridge because everything was covered in rich, delicious turkey stock, including her veggies and fruits and, well...it was straight out of a scene from the movie Seven absent the head in the box, though there's no guarantee mine won't be shipped UPS later today when she realizes that smell is harder to get rid of then a house infested with farts.

TL;DR I'm a barely functional assssss clown who really has no business breeding.
Oh my. Sorry GM. It sounds horrible but it made me laugh. Is that wrong?
No no, not wrong at all. I'm here to make everybody else feel better about themselves. Hell, show your wives, let them realize it could be soooooooooooo much worse.
If it makes you feel better, failing to cool the stock before sealing and refrigerating it could have gone much, much worse.
Especially in an insulated container

 
No no, not wrong at all. I'm here to make everybody else feel better about themselves. Hell, show your wives, let them realize it could be soooooooooooo much worse.
If it makes you feel better, failing to cool the stock before sealing and refrigerating it could have gone much, much worse.
Especially in an insulated container
can you guys break this down for me?

I would like to avoid making a similar mistake. what can happen here? explosions and stuff?

 
No no, not wrong at all. I'm here to make everybody else feel better about themselves. Hell, show your wives, let them realize it could be soooooooooooo much worse.
If it makes you feel better, failing to cool the stock before sealing and refrigerating it could have gone much, much worse.
Especially in an insulated container
can you guys break this down for me?

I would like to avoid making a similar mistake. what can happen here? explosions and stuff?
food poisoning, for one.

 
One of the keys to avoiding food poisoning from stocks and soups is to cool them rapidly, and never seal an insulated container until the liquid is the temperature you want to store it at. Otherwise you risk rapid growth of bad, bad things.

 
Little concerned about all the stock I put in the freezer before it cooled down. :oldunsure:

I really shouldn't be using the kitchen.
probably ok. quickly cooled and not insulated like a thermos.

then again, I remember this stuff from food handling classes when I bartended 25 years ago, and I was almost certainly drunk when I took the class/test.

 
One of the keys to avoiding food poisoning from stocks and soups is to cool them rapidly, and never seal an insulated container until the liquid is the temperature you want to store it at. Otherwise you risk rapid growth of bad, bad things.
Interesting. Never knew this and now somewhat shocked that I'm still alive.

 
One of the keys to avoiding food poisoning from stocks and soups is to cool them rapidly, and never seal an insulated container until the liquid is the temperature you want to store it at. Otherwise you risk rapid growth of bad, bad things.
Homebrewing beer has some of the same elements. Once your boiling is done, you need to get the wort down to temperature (70 - basically room temp) as quickly as possible to avoid infection. When I first started brewing, I'd either set the kettle outside if it was cold or put it in a sink packed with ice. But everything I read said taking an hour to get to temperature was asking for trouble. I broke down and bought a wort chiller (basically, coiled copper tubing you run cold water through and immerse into the liquid). I didn't get a fancy one, but can get my juice to 70 from boiling in 20 minutes now. There are some really hi-efficiently chillers that can do it much faster.

Anyway, not exactly the same thing but I like beer so I thought I'd share.

 
Say, you guys want to feel a little better about yourselves this morning? I know you do! Sit back and take a little spin in my shoes in what I'm calling "The Week of Woe".

- Monday: Not sure if our little town of weird has made national news for the torrential downpours and flooding that is now killing people who suffer from hubris and think their little eco-friendly roller skate cars can plough through the standing high water that's littering our roads now, but Portland is getting abused by rain which has not only flooded my back yard, but is now causing a neat little leak around my chimney that's penetrating all the way down to our basement and will cost $1,500 to fix. Merry ####### Xmas to me. That was how my morning began. Work's been a dumpster fire the last few months with dismal performance, redemptions and talk of shutting it all down. So after a nasty day at the office where my stress level was elevated to 11, I hopped in my car, hoping to race home and find the warm embrace of my loving wife and family booze. One little problem. The highway I take home every day which is clogged like John Madden's arteries (too soon?) on a good day was a virtual parking lot. Why? Because ODOT shut down the highway due to high water and was forcing cars to exit. Did I learn this from traffic reports on the radio or those worthless ####### electric signs that tell us to slow down or use caution stop masturbating? No. I had to rely on Twitter and some cunning short-cut navigation through neighborhoods along with every other wiseacre who was doing the same. 90 minutes after leaving the office which is 12 miles from my house, I was home. Home where I learned my son had clogged a toilet with TP & turds, so with screaming twin infant in one arm and a plunger in the other, I plunged the mess away. Hey at least the MNF game was on and that would be fun to watch, especially since I had the Redskins -3 in a virtual lock at home against a hapless Cowboys' team that can't move the ball without Romo. :mellow:

- Tuesday: Nothing out of the ordinary, maybe things have turned around? Work sucked, but my commute home wasn't bad. I even got to make a giant pot of turkey stock with the leftover carcass, which I roasted before throwing into a stock pot, creating a wonderful smelling, deliciously rich turkey stock which I'll use for soups and jambalaya and gumbo and maybe I'll bathe in it, who knows? So much stock was made that I ran out of Tupperware containers and, thinking outside the box, located my giant thermos and patted myself on the back filling it to the brim, shutting the lid on tight and putting it in the fridge for future use this week. Went on to make Mexican Turkey soup that night, enough for the work week and hey, lookie there, life is back on track!

- Wednesday: Greeted at the office by my CFO and boss who let me know the CFO screwed up last month overpaying two limited partners who redeemed in full by a total of $25,000. Every hedge fund I've ever known or been a part of pays 90% of their redemption requests leaving a 10% holdback so the auditors can do their thing and ensure there are no errors. But not our hedge fund, no....our CFO prides himself on his impeccable work, after all, he DID go to Dartmouth! Only this time, he screwed up and over paid two partners, one a half drunk crazy Pollock who is losing his assssssssss off with businesses in Russia. The other a Korean who gives me a headache every time I talk to him, not for his poor English, but for his poor understanding of anything and incessant need to ask the same question over and over. How he made his wealth, I have no idea, but guess who was tasked with recovering this money? Oh, and recourse? LOOLLLLOOOO! Oh well, at least my boss really liked our stylistic Xmas cards that I ordered from Vista Print, only you can't say Xmas anymore, so the sleek black modern design with a white Xmas tree and our flashy new corporate logo that I put on there looked really good and he said so, only he paused and said "Wait a minute? Did you see this? They spelled 'Happy Holidays' with two LLs! We can't send out cards that say 'Happy Hollidays!' How did they screw this up?" :oldunsure: He could tell from my sheepish reply and face discoloration that it wasn't Vista Print that screwed up; it was poor spelling, dim witted, worthless corporate waste that is General Malaise who butchered the spelling on our company holiday cards. :bag:

- Today: You remember the back-patting smart mofo who thought outside the box and used his giant thermos to house the rest of his turkey stock that he made on Tuesday? Yeah, here's a pro-tip for you amateur chefs out there - when you are making a stock or anything really and you plan on putting in the fridge for later use, let it cool down before putting the contents under pressure in, say, a giant thermos. As I walked downstairs this morning, ready to go into the office, I heard two crying infants and one braying 3 year old shouting for her mother. Her mother, the most patient, calm woman in the world was shouting back to her that she was busy! Busy? Busy with what? Oh....right. The vegetarian wife of the dumbest dildo on the planet was emptying the entire fridge because everything was covered in rich, delicious turkey stock, including her veggies and fruits and, well...it was straight out of a scene from the movie Seven absent the head in the box, though there's no guarantee mine won't be shipped UPS later today when she realizes that smell is harder to get rid of then a house infested with farts.

TL;DR I'm a barely functional assssss clown who really has no business breeding.
Your chimney leaked? The horror.

 
GM, you sure it's flashing that's rotten? Flashing is made out of metal
It's bent and twisted in one area; rusted in another. There's little doubt it needs replacing. Also needs a cap...just wide open to the elements.
That sucks GM. But how in the world did your inspector miss that? I would send the bill to him.
Most inspectors here in Portland don't go on roofs. The cap isn't required in Portland metro

 
bloody mary's suck
It's an excuse to drink early in the morning. Why on earth would you pooh-pooh that? Communist?
Try mimosas
As I believe Tre or somebody very wise once stated: "I celebrate the entire breakfast drink catalog".
So alcohol for breakfast is OK but stuff like waffles is not?
Hey, if waffles could numb my soul and medicate my mind the way booze does, I'd be a sweet-tooth chomping, syrup-licking tub of goo pushing 300 LBs.
So that's what happened to me

 
They spelled 'Happy Holidays' with two LLs! We can't send out cards that say 'Happy Hollidays!' How did they screw this up?" :oldunsure: He could tell from my sheepish reply and face discoloration that it wasn't Vista Print that screwed up; it was poor spelling, dim witted, worthless corporate waste that is General Malaise who butchered the spelling on our company holiday cards.
Matt?

 
Seems like we could all use some good news around here.* Thanks to your help, I was able to clean my Dell up enough that it became usable again, thereby saving me the boatloads that would have been spent on a new laptop.

*Did I get the YSR-Dad phrasing close to correct?

 
Say, you guys want to feel a little better about yourselves this morning? I know you do! Sit back and take a little spin in my shoes in what I'm calling "The Week of Woe".

- Monday: Not sure if our little town of weird has made national news for the torrential downpours and flooding that is now killing people who suffer from hubris and think their little eco-friendly roller skate cars can plough through the standing high water that's littering our roads now, but Portland is getting abused by rain which has not only flooded my back yard, but is now causing a neat little leak around my chimney that's penetrating all the way down to our basement and will cost $1,500 to fix. Merry ####### Xmas to me. That was how my morning began. Work's been a dumpster fire the last few months with dismal performance, redemptions and talk of shutting it all down. So after a nasty day at the office where my stress level was elevated to 11, I hopped in my car, hoping to race home and find the warm embrace of my loving wife and family booze. One little problem. The highway I take home every day which is clogged like John Madden's arteries (too soon?) on a good day was a virtual parking lot. Why? Because ODOT shut down the highway due to high water and was forcing cars to exit. Did I learn this from traffic reports on the radio or those worthless ####### electric signs that tell us to slow down or use caution stop masturbating? No. I had to rely on Twitter and some cunning short-cut navigation through neighborhoods along with every other wiseacre who was doing the same. 90 minutes after leaving the office which is 12 miles from my house, I was home. Home where I learned my son had clogged a toilet with TP & turds, so with screaming twin infant in one arm and a plunger in the other, I plunged the mess away. Hey at least the MNF game was on and that would be fun to watch, especially since I had the Redskins -3 in a virtual lock at home against a hapless Cowboys' team that can't move the ball without Romo. :mellow:

- Tuesday: Nothing out of the ordinary, maybe things have turned around? Work sucked, but my commute home wasn't bad. I even got to make a giant pot of turkey stock with the leftover carcass, which I roasted before throwing into a stock pot, creating a wonderful smelling, deliciously rich turkey stock which I'll use for soups and jambalaya and gumbo and maybe I'll bathe in it, who knows? So much stock was made that I ran out of Tupperware containers and, thinking outside the box, located my giant thermos and patted myself on the back filling it to the brim, shutting the lid on tight and putting it in the fridge for future use this week. Went on to make Mexican Turkey soup that night, enough for the work week and hey, lookie there, life is back on track!

- Wednesday: Greeted at the office by my CFO and boss who let me know the CFO screwed up last month overpaying two limited partners who redeemed in full by a total of $25,000. Every hedge fund I've ever known or been a part of pays 90% of their redemption requests leaving a 10% holdback so the auditors can do their thing and ensure there are no errors. But not our hedge fund, no....our CFO prides himself on his impeccable work, after all, he DID go to Dartmouth! Only this time, he screwed up and over paid two partners, one a half drunk crazy Pollock who is losing his assssssssss off with businesses in Russia. The other a Korean who gives me a headache every time I talk to him, not for his poor English, but for his poor understanding of anything and incessant need to ask the same question over and over. How he made his wealth, I have no idea, but guess who was tasked with recovering this money? Oh, and recourse? LOOLLLLOOOO! Oh well, at least my boss really liked our stylistic Xmas cards that I ordered from Vista Print, only you can't say Xmas anymore, so the sleek black modern design with a white Xmas tree and our flashy new corporate logo that I put on there looked really good and he said so, only he paused and said "Wait a minute? Did you see this? They spelled 'Happy Holidays' with two LLs! We can't send out cards that say 'Happy Hollidays!' How did they screw this up?" :oldunsure: He could tell from my sheepish reply and face discoloration that it wasn't Vista Print that screwed up; it was poor spelling, dim witted, worthless corporate waste that is General Malaise who butchered the spelling on our company holiday cards. :bag:

- Today: You remember the back-patting smart mofo who thought outside the box and used his giant thermos to house the rest of his turkey stock that he made on Tuesday? Yeah, here's a pro-tip for you amateur chefs out there - when you are making a stock or anything really and you plan on putting in the fridge for later use, let it cool down before putting the contents under pressure in, say, a giant thermos. As I walked downstairs this morning, ready to go into the office, I heard two crying infants and one braying 3 year old shouting for her mother. Her mother, the most patient, calm woman in the world was shouting back to her that she was busy! Busy? Busy with what? Oh....right. The vegetarian wife of the dumbest dildo on the planet was emptying the entire fridge because everything was covered in rich, delicious turkey stock, including her veggies and fruits and, well...it was straight out of a scene from the movie Seven absent the head in the box, though there's no guarantee mine won't be shipped UPS later today when she realizes that smell is harder to get rid of then a house infested with farts.

TL;DR I'm a barely functional assssss clown who really has no business breeding.
Your chimney leaked? The horror.
I'm sure there's a house on top of an Indian brurial ground you can buy next, Skipper.

 
Say, you guys want to feel a little better about yourselves this morning? I know you do! Sit back and take a little spin in my shoes in what I'm calling "The Week of Woe".

- Monday: Not sure if our little town of weird has made national news for the torrential downpours and flooding that is now killing people who suffer from hubris and think their little eco-friendly roller skate cars can plough through the standing high water that's littering our roads now, but Portland is getting abused by rain which has not only flooded my back yard, but is now causing a neat little leak around my chimney that's penetrating all the way down to our basement and will cost $1,500 to fix. Merry ####### Xmas to me. That was how my morning began. Work's been a dumpster fire the last few months with dismal performance, redemptions and talk of shutting it all down. So after a nasty day at the office where my stress level was elevated to 11, I hopped in my car, hoping to race home and find the warm embrace of my loving wife and family booze. One little problem. The highway I take home every day which is clogged like John Madden's arteries (too soon?) on a good day was a virtual parking lot. Why? Because ODOT shut down the highway due to high water and was forcing cars to exit. Did I learn this from traffic reports on the radio or those worthless ####### electric signs that tell us to slow down or use caution stop masturbating? No. I had to rely on Twitter and some cunning short-cut navigation through neighborhoods along with every other wiseacre who was doing the same. 90 minutes after leaving the office which is 12 miles from my house, I was home. Home where I learned my son had clogged a toilet with TP & turds, so with screaming twin infant in one arm and a plunger in the other, I plunged the mess away. Hey at least the MNF game was on and that would be fun to watch, especially since I had the Redskins -3 in a virtual lock at home against a hapless Cowboys' team that can't move the ball without Romo. :mellow:

- Tuesday: Nothing out of the ordinary, maybe things have turned around? Work sucked, but my commute home wasn't bad. I even got to make a giant pot of turkey stock with the leftover carcass, which I roasted before throwing into a stock pot, creating a wonderful smelling, deliciously rich turkey stock which I'll use for soups and jambalaya and gumbo and maybe I'll bathe in it, who knows? So much stock was made that I ran out of Tupperware containers and, thinking outside the box, located my giant thermos and patted myself on the back filling it to the brim, shutting the lid on tight and putting it in the fridge for future use this week. Went on to make Mexican Turkey soup that night, enough for the work week and hey, lookie there, life is back on track!

- Wednesday: Greeted at the office by my CFO and boss who let me know the CFO screwed up last month overpaying two limited partners who redeemed in full by a total of $25,000. Every hedge fund I've ever known or been a part of pays 90% of their redemption requests leaving a 10% holdback so the auditors can do their thing and ensure there are no errors. But not our hedge fund, no....our CFO prides himself on his impeccable work, after all, he DID go to Dartmouth! Only this time, he screwed up and over paid two partners, one a half drunk crazy Pollock who is losing his assssssssss off with businesses in Russia. The other a Korean who gives me a headache every time I talk to him, not for his poor English, but for his poor understanding of anything and incessant need to ask the same question over and over. How he made his wealth, I have no idea, but guess who was tasked with recovering this money? Oh, and recourse? LOOLLLLOOOO! Oh well, at least my boss really liked our stylistic Xmas cards that I ordered from Vista Print, only you can't say Xmas anymore, so the sleek black modern design with a white Xmas tree and our flashy new corporate logo that I put on there looked really good and he said so, only he paused and said "Wait a minute? Did you see this? They spelled 'Happy Holidays' with two LLs! We can't send out cards that say 'Happy Hollidays!' How did they screw this up?" :oldunsure: He could tell from my sheepish reply and face discoloration that it wasn't Vista Print that screwed up; it was poor spelling, dim witted, worthless corporate waste that is General Malaise who butchered the spelling on our company holiday cards. :bag:

- Today: You remember the back-patting smart mofo who thought outside the box and used his giant thermos to house the rest of his turkey stock that he made on Tuesday? Yeah, here's a pro-tip for you amateur chefs out there - when you are making a stock or anything really and you plan on putting in the fridge for later use, let it cool down before putting the contents under pressure in, say, a giant thermos. As I walked downstairs this morning, ready to go into the office, I heard two crying infants and one braying 3 year old shouting for her mother. Her mother, the most patient, calm woman in the world was shouting back to her that she was busy! Busy? Busy with what? Oh....right. The vegetarian wife of the dumbest dildo on the planet was emptying the entire fridge because everything was covered in rich, delicious turkey stock, including her veggies and fruits and, well...it was straight out of a scene from the movie Seven absent the head in the box, though there's no guarantee mine won't be shipped UPS later today when she realizes that smell is harder to get rid of then a house infested with farts.

TL;DR I'm a barely functional assssss clown who really has no business breeding.
Your chimney leaked? The horror.
I'm sure there's a house on top of an Indian brurial ground you can buy next, Skipper.
:lmao:
 

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