GM's Thread About Everything/GM's Thread About Nothing (23 Viewers)

[Officer Pete Malloy]

Actually happened at my high school. Kids in some extra curricular activity rented a movie for a movie night, then someone swapped it out at the last minute for basic instinct. Boys in the upstairs balcony started cheering during the legs crossing scene. Girls downstairs felt something rain down on them. Apparently at least one guy actually actually jizzed. Investigations, suspensions and i think there was an expulsion but no actual sexual assault charges. Was fun going to football games after that, kids in the stands with signs saying we don't have to beat you guys you already beat yourselves.

wat

He said this actually happened at his high school. Kids in some extra curricular activity rented a movie for a movie night, then someone swapped it out at the last minute for basic instinct. Boys in the upstairs balcony started cheering during the legs crossing scene. Girls downstairs felt something rain down on them. Apparently at least one guy actually actually jizzed. Investigations, suspensions and i think there was an expulsion but no actual sexual assault charges. It was fun for him going to football games after that, kids in the stands with signs saying we don't have to beat you guys you already beat yourselves.

wat

 

[General Malaise]

Oh and Jenny lives the life of Riley (look it up). She lives in a house with a few other people like her that is managed by caregivers. Basically, since they all get a ton of disability/SS/etc it is a sweet set up.

About every two weeks the caregivers take the residents on some sort of day trip. You know where they go half of the time? To the GD horse races.

ALLLLLLL OF MY LIKES FOR A DECADE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[General Malaise]

Oh and Jenny lives the life of Riley (look it up).

Great tune.

The Lightning Seeds! That's a name I haven't heard in a long long time.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

Oh and Jenny lives the life of Riley (look it up). She lives in a house with a few other people like her that is managed by caregivers. Basically, since they all get a ton of disability/SS/etc it is a sweet set up.

About every two weeks the caregivers take the residents on some sort of day trip. You know where they go half of the time? To the GD horse races.

ALLLLLLL OF MY LIKES FOR A DECADE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This happens at least 3 times a year at some BS family get-together like a birthday party for two grown-### adults:

Me: Hey, where's Jenny?

Jenny's Mom: Oh she and her housemates went down to Santa Anita.

Me: And I'm here eating Costco sheetcake.

 

[Chemical X]

I would love a personal handler............

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

Eggnog Brandy Alexander

2oz Nog

1.5oz Brandy

1oz Creme de Cacao

Shake with ice, strain and serve with nutmeg garnish on top.

Sooooooo tasty. Also insane calorie count. #### it, I'm all in.

My wife has a cookie exchange tonight at our house. After I put the kids down I have to bartend. 11 women, 3 preggers, 1 breastfeeding, 2 super-Jesus teetotalers. So 5 drinking. I'm really hoping I 'accidently' make to much egg nog Brandy Alexander and have to, you know, finish it myself.

Sounds ####ing terrible.

His life?

 

[Bob Sacamano]

I celebrate booze in all its forms.

 

[General Malaise]

Tanner doing the lord's work in the "This Is What People In Your State Googled The Most" thread.

 

[kevzilla]

BTW, if you're being transported in an ambulance, and it collides with another vehicle causing you injury, add the accident code V86.11 to whatever injuries you sustained. Enjoy your Friday.

 

[Limp Ditka]

I celebrate booze in all its forms.

Even Malört?

 

[Bob Sacamano]

I celebrate booze in all its forms.

Even Malört?

 

[mr roboto]

BTW, if you're being transported in an ambulance, and it collides with another vehicle causing you injury, add the accident code V86.11 to whatever injuries you sustained. Enjoy your Friday.

What if I was bitten, in a coffee shop, by a service dog in training?Cause that actually just happened...

 

[General Malaise]

BTW, if you're being transported in an ambulance, and it collides with another vehicle causing you injury, add the accident code V86.11 to whatever injuries you sustained. Enjoy your Friday.

What if I was bitten, in a coffee shop, by a service dog in training?Cause that actually just happened...

They tell you NOT to pet them, Stupid. Or did the dog just walk up and bite you?

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

I celebrate booze in all its forms.

Even Malört?

I am not drinking any F***ing Merlot!

wait...

 

[Thorn]

She's a fine girl. What a good wife she would be.

Don't talk about my lady that way.

What an angry wife she would be.

but my life, my love, and my lady ... is U.T.

 

[mr roboto]

BTW, if you're being transported in an ambulance, and it collides with another vehicle causing you injury, add the accident code V86.11 to whatever injuries you sustained. Enjoy your Friday.

What if I was bitten, in a coffee shop, by a service dog in training?Cause that actually just happened...

They tell you NOT to pet them, Stupid. Or did the dog just walk up and bite you?

No. It was kinda my fault. Standing at the counter, ordered, stepped back 1 step before turning to walk to the end of the bar where the drink was delivered. I didn't see the dog/trainer behind me and the dog was immediately behind me. I stepped on his paw (lightly) but it startled him and he caught my finger. Very little blood, dog is fine so am I.

 

[General Malaise]

BTW, if you're being transported in an ambulance, and it collides with another vehicle causing you injury, add the accident code V86.11 to whatever injuries you sustained. Enjoy your Friday.

What if I was bitten, in a coffee shop, by a service dog in training?Cause that actually just happened...

They tell you NOT to pet them, Stupid. Or did the dog just walk up and bite you?

No. It was kinda my fault. Standing at the counter, ordered, stepped back 1 step before turning to walk to the end of the bar where the drink was delivered. I didn't see the dog/trainer behind me and the dog was immediately behind me. I stepped on his paw (lightly) but it startled him and he caught my finger.Very little blood, dog is fine so am I.

I think you got a great case!

 

[Thorn]

This made me laugh more than it probably should have:

http://distractify.com/humor/2015/12/14/mustafa-fb-troll

No one believes that's real, do they?

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

This made me laugh more than it probably should have:

http://distractify.com/humor/2015/12/14/mustafa-fb-troll

No one believes that's real, do they?

I think it was just revealed that it isn't real.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

http://i.imgur.com/0ZWPBE6.jpg

 

[Dan Lambskin]

I celebrate booze in all its forms.

Even Malört?

Dammit it sounds awful but I want some

 

[Thorn]

This made me laugh more than it probably should have:

http://distractify.com/humor/2015/12/14/mustafa-fb-troll

No one believes that's real, do they?

I think it was just revealed that it isn't real.

"Reveal"? What are you people, on dope?

 

[General Malaise]

This made me laugh more than it probably should have:

http://distractify.com/humor/2015/12/14/mustafa-fb-troll

No one believes that's real, do they?

I didn't think it was that far fetched but I now know it's fake and I guess I should take back the laughter.

 

[General Malaise]

This made me laugh more than it probably should have:

http://distractify.com/humor/2015/12/14/mustafa-fb-troll

No one believes that's real, do they?

I think it was just revealed that it isn't real.

"Reveal"? What are you people, on dope?

well, yes...I in fact am on dope.

 

[Thorn]

This made me laugh more than it probably should have:

http://distractify.com/humor/2015/12/14/mustafa-fb-troll

No one believes that's real, do they?

I think it was just revealed that it isn't real.

"Reveal"? What are you people, on dope?

well, yes...I in fact am on dope.

I KNEW IT

 

[General Malaise]

And I don't care, 5/7 is funny to me.

 

[Chemical X]

This made me laugh more than it probably should have:

http://distractify.com/humor/2015/12/14/mustafa-fb-troll

No one believes that's real, do they?

I think it was just revealed that it isn't real.

"Reveal"? What are you people, on dope?

well, yes...I in fact am on dope.

well, yes...I in fact am a dope.

fixed

 

[General Malaise]

This made me laugh more than it probably should have:

http://distractify.com/humor/2015/12/14/mustafa-fb-troll

No one believes that's real, do they?

I think it was just revealed that it isn't real.

"Reveal"? What are you people, on dope?

well, yes...I in fact am on dope.

well, yes...I in fact am a dope.

fixed

Says the guy who sends his fantasy baseball check to a woman I divorced 8 years ago....

 

[kevzilla]

Bitten by dog, W54.0

By orca, W56.21

 

[St. Louis Bob]

I received my GMTAN SS gift from Zooks. THANKS GB!!!!

 

[Idiot Boxer]

I celebrate booze in all its forms.

http://highproofspirit.com/infuse/iceberg-lettuce-infused-vodka/

 

[Dan Lambskin]

Just had a discussion about eating penguins

Anyone know if this is something that can legally be done?

 

[DA RAIDERS]

I received my GMTAN SS gift from Zooks. THANKS GB!!!!

i didn't get my invite

 

[General Malaise]

I received my GMTAN SS gift from Zooks. THANKS GB!!!!

6 pounds of apple seeds?

 

[General Malaise]

Just had a discussion about eating penguins

Anyone know if this is something that can legally be done?

I think whales do it every day.

 

[Chemical X]

This made me laugh more than it probably should have:

http://distractify.com/humor/2015/12/14/mustafa-fb-troll

No one believes that's real, do they?

I think it was just revealed that it isn't real.

"Reveal"? What are you people, on dope?

well, yes...I in fact am on dope.

well, yes...I in fact am a dope.

fixed

Says the guy who sends his fantasy baseball check to a woman I divorced 8 years ago....

hey, she earned it.....

 

[St. Louis Bob]

Gianmarco/Chem X, I'm headed to Italy in April (Venice, Florance,Rome) I'm the anti-K4 so not exactly an experienced world traveler. Any advice is appreciated.

 

[DA RAIDERS]

Gianmarco/Chem X, I'm headed to Italy in April (Venice, Florance,Rome) I'm the anti-K4 so not exactly an experienced world traveler. Any advice is appreciated.

With kids?

 

[St. Louis Bob]

Gianmarco/Chem X, I'm headed to Italy in April (Venice, Florance,Rome) I'm the anti-K4 so not exactly an experienced world traveler. Any advice is appreciated.

With kids?

​

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NO

 

[Bob Sacamano]

I celebrate booze in all its forms.

http://highproofspirit.com/infuse/iceberg-lettuce-infused-vodka/

More fake than the 5/7 thing

 

[Foosball God]

I celebrate booze in all its forms.

http://highproofspirit.com/infuse/iceberg-lettuce-infused-vodka/

 

[El Floppo]

what part(s) of Italy, bob?

 

[DA RAIDERS]

Da Raiders> so jealous. Will you send me an XL long sleeve mammoth shirt? You know the one.

Damn it!!! Just landed back in LA. I'll be back up there later in the year and I'll grab you one. And yes, I know the one.

heading back up in a couple weeks. shoot me your address.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

what part(s) of Italy, bob?

Venice, Florance,Rome

 

[St. Louis Bob]

what part(s) of Italy, bob?

Venice, Florance, Rome

 

[Bob Sacamano]

what part(s) of Italy, bob?

Venice, Florance,Rome

Would have helped if he'd said this in the first place.

 

[St. Louis Bob]

what part(s) of Italy, bob?

Venice, Florance,Rome

 

[St. Louis Bob]

what part(s) of Italy, bob?

Venice, Florance,Rome

Would have helped if he'd said this in the first place.

Well I do have brain damage.

 

[DA RAIDERS]

what part(s) of Italy, bob?

Venice, Florance,Rome

 

[El Floppo]

what part(s) of Italy, bob?

Venice, Florance,Rome

Would have helped if he'd said this in the first place.