GM's Thread About Everything/GM's Thread About Nothing (19 Viewers)

[krista4]

Huh.  Which part of the massage chair is ticklish?  And how can you tell?

All parts, if you do it right.  I can tell by the high-pitched giggles.

 

[OrtonToOlsen]

I'm in the midst of a pedicure.  Plus side:  massage chair!  Downside:  the ticklish part.

In first period today a girl announced that her phone (in her back pocket) kept going off..."it keeps vibrating my butt".

 

[El Floppo]

I'm in the midst of a pedicure.  Plus side:  massage chair!  Downside:  the ticklish part.

oh... phew. I read that as "procedure". pedicure is better... and also explains the massage chair and tickling.

eta: although it could also explain the mayor of seattle... right?

 

[krista4]

In first period today a girl announced that her phone (in her back pocket) kept going off..."it keeps vibrating my butt".

 And your response was?

 

[tommyboy]

wait till you discover the clothes dryer, kid

 

[Thorn]

All parts, if you do it right.  I can tell by the high-pitched giggles.

There was a general tinkling of enjoyment

 

[Limp Ditka]

In first period today a girl announced that her phone (in her back pocket) kept going off..."it keeps vibrating my butt".

 

 

[Limp Ditka]

There was a general tinkling of enjoyment

But not a pooping 

 

[Thorn]

But not a pooping 

let not get crazy

 

[General Murmur of Agreemen]

There was a general tinkling of enjoyment

 

[OrtonToOlsen]

 And your response was?

https://giphy.com/gifs/xUA7behkUvPQ6TTSQo/html5

 

[DA RAIDERS]

how long is she there? is she coming back to the mainland for a bit until things get under control there? 

cripes. I can't imagine what she's going/gone through... and I've been through a homeless-causing building fire and Sandy.

she is staying on puerto rico for the immediate future.  she is setting up a relief command post for her boss.  and then he is going to let her live in his st thomas house to continue the relief efforts.

 

[bostonfred]

Tender

 

[General Malaise]

Tender

 

[Henry Ford]

The Indians have won 20 games in a row. That is more than the Browns have won since September 15, 2012.

That can't be right.  I heard there was a new winningest quarterback in Browns stadium history (the new Browns) as of last weekend.

 

[rockaction]

Tender

All I could think of was Jackson Browne. 

 

[OrtonToOlsen]

All I could think of was Jackson Browne. 

Seeing a used artificial hoo-ha makes you think of Jackson Browne?  

Im not here to judge or label but OK.

 

[rockaction]

Seeing a used artificial hoo-ha makes you think of Jackson Browne?  

Im not here to judge or label but OK.

Tender Is The Night, man. 

Sort of about sex and the title of the post, IIRC.  

eta* I'm not here to judge or do anything, either, it's just what I thought of.  

 

[El Floppo]

Seeing a used artificial hoo-ha makes you think of Jackson Browne?  

Im not here to judge or label but OK.

Tender Is The Night, man. 

Sort of about sex and the title of the post, IIRC.  

eta* I'm not here to judge or do anything, either, it's just what I thought of.  

Edited just now by rockaction

I'm here to judge this ####### freak.

 

[OrtonToOlsen]

Tender Is The Night, man. 

Sort of about sex and the title of the post, IIRC.  

Not Keats or Fitzgerald?

 

[rockaction]

Not Keats or Fitzgerald?

Fitzgerald is actually the first thing that comes to mind when I think of that, frankly, but I figured I'd get made fun of. 

Larf as I write this.  

 

[rockaction]

I'm here to judge this ####### freak.

eta, mang. Eta.  

 

[Henry Ford]

Not Keats or Fitzgerald?

They should call you Gordon Lightfoot, 'cause this cat just got rekt by a post 'bout Fitzgerald.

 

[rockaction]

They should call you Gordon Lightfoot, 'cause this cat just got rekt by a post 'bout Fitzgerald.

I'd be, um, Bittergreen, if I wasn't such a novice.  

 

[Henry Ford]

I'd be, um, Bittergreen, if I wasn't such a novice.  

If you could read my mind, I'll prove my love in my fashion.  Stay loose, Cotton Jenny.

 

[ScottNorwood]

If you send someone a trade offer in fantasy football and he replies with a picture of his penis, does that mean he liked the offer or that he didn't like the offer?

 

[ScottNorwood]

Sorry meant to post that in the Shark Pool

 

[Dan Lambskin]

If you send someone a trade offer in fantasy football and he replies with a picture of his penis, does that mean he liked the offer or that he didn't like the offer?

Was it flaccid or erect? 

 

[Limp Ditka]

Was it flaccid or erect? 

I never have to field questions like this.

 

[ScottNorwood]

Was it flaccid or erect? 

Easy there perv

 

[heckmanm]

Was it flaccid or erect? 

That would be some outstanding shtick

 

[El Floppo]

If you send someone a trade offer in fantasy football and he replies with a picture of his penis, does that mean he liked the offer or that he didn't like the offer?

I think... this time none of this is a euphemism

 

[El Floppo]

That would be some outstanding shtick

Pm sent

 

[5-ish Finkle]

There are an almost infinite number of ways we could structure a fair deal that works for everybody, but this guy is a delusional narcissist who is achingly insecure underneath an outer shell of pure egotism. (sound like anybody who is in the news a bunch lately?)

That's the good news.

The bad news is that he is an absolute pie in the sky thinker, so any deal that is presented to him will be evaluated in comparison with the perfect deal that is surely just over the horizon.

I was explaining this to my old boss and prospective financial backer. I told him I wanted the guy nowhere near this new venture. My old boss said "I have a lot of experience with massaging the egos of useless people and giving them concessions that aren't worth much, only to marginalize them later", or words to that effect.  

And I know that he does. 

I don't even know him, but I love this guy so hard.

If this whole SoCal thing doesn't work out, I would totally work for that guy.  He gets it.

 

[mr. furley]

my 6 year old doesn't like Zestar apples because "they taste like fruit"

 

[Osaurus]

my 6 year old doesn't like Zestar apples because "they taste like fruit"

Outrage!  Maybe coat them in Fun Dip.

 

[RC94]

My father told me he just spent a ton of money on tickets to see Bette Midler on Broadway (show is called Hello Dolly!).  IMO the only 3 words in the English language that promise more boredom are “featuring Celine Dion”.

 

[mr. furley]

Outrage!  Maybe coat them in Fun Dip.

the only thing my kid loves more than apples is chicken.  she will eat any apple, any time. except, apparently, Zestar. 

i should add that the 3rd most loved thing is being an unpredictable and contrarian #####

 

[OrtonToOlsen]

Just in time for fall

https://imgur.com/gallery/beyTn

 

[shuke]

Tender

All I could think of was Jackson Browne. 

"Before the Deluge"?

 

[rockaction]

"Before the Deluge"?

First time I ever heard this, man. Love your posts.  

 

[RedmondLonghorn]

I don't even know him, but I love this guy so hard.

If this whole SoCal thing doesn't work out, I would totally work for that guy.  He gets it.

He is one of a kind. He completely dominates in business. I have no idea how much he is worth, but it has a lot of zeros. Made it all himself, most of it after he turned 40.

His first wife was the same kind of toxic narcissist that mine was. She cheated on him with her personal trainer, then divorced him. Yet somehow she made him out to be the bad guy to their kids. She is now divorced for a second time. They live in Houston. Guess who he rescued during Harvey? Both his ex-wife and his former mother in law, neither of whom are his favorite people. He did it for his kids and also because he is a fundamentally decent human being.

 

[RedmondLonghorn]

"Before the Deluge"?

antediluvian?

 

[DA RAIDERS]

I don't even know him, but I love this guy so hard.

If this whole SoCal thing doesn't work out, I would totally work for that guy.  He gets it.

when i stop working every day, i'll invite you and the lady to the house for dinner or whatever.  currently in the middle of 11 straight.  i have this sunday off, but don't know next weeks schedule yet.  are you weekend only or will a monday work for you guys?

 

[Osaurus]

So I volunteered to some some FEMA damage assessment work in Texas.  Looks like the powers that be want me to be in Winchester, TX for 3 weeks starting probably next week.  Can I stay with you @kevzilla?    jk.  Maybe we can grab a beer if they give me a little time off at night.

 

[shuke]

So I volunteered to some some FEMA damage assessment work in Texas.  Looks like the powers that be want me to be in Winchester, TX for 3 weeks starting probably next week.  Can I stay with you @kevzilla?    jk.  Maybe we can grab a beer if they give me a little time off at night.

I'll be in Austin next week.

 

[RedmondLonghorn]

I'll be in Austin next week.

Just got back. It was glorious while I was there: mid- to upper-80s with very little humidity and blue skies.

 

[El Floppo]

my 6 year old doesn't like Zestar apples because "they taste like fruit"

I don't like them because I'm unsure if they're pronounced "zest-are" or like tatou would say "ze-star, ze-star". fruit shouldn't be this complicated. or apples that taste like fruit.

 

[RedmondLonghorn]

my 6 year old doesn't like Zestar apples because "they taste like fruit"

Never heard of that variety of apple. I had to look it up.

All we get here are Washington apples (duh) and New Zealand imports.

 

[OrtonToOlsen]

The usual