What's new
Fantasy Football - Footballguys Forums

This is a sample guest message. Register a free account today to become a member! Once signed in, you'll be able to participate on this site by adding your own topics and posts, as well as connect with other members through your own private inbox!

GM's thread about nothing (12 Viewers)

YSR said:
kbm said:
YSR, these cookies rock!
Click to expand...
:no:They are, what, 3 weeks old? I hope you noted the postmark, btw. I'll be making a new batch sometime in the next month, and will UPS them this time. Stupid USPS. :thumbdown:
Click to expand...
12/10, Nice.:conversation:Wife: Who sent you these cookies? They're really good!Me: Some gal I met on the Internet.Wife: Oh, tell her I like them.Me thinks somebody feels a little too comfortable in our arrangement. <_<
 
Last edited by a moderator:
BobbyLayne said:
GM - When you have time, please retitle GM's Thread About All Things ScatalogicalTIA
Click to expand...
Did I just realize that you are a Central Michigan alum? That's where my wife and her siblings went to college. :goodposting: I have a Chips sweatshirt that I wear quite frequently.
 
Thorn said:
After catching up on the last few pages, I want to make sure that all of you have seen this.
Click to expand...
:thumbup: :scared: :scared: :) :lmao: Before, I used to like George Brett. Now I love him. My 2 favorite parts are:

at 32 seconds:

George (talking about ####ing his pants) : I'm good twice a year for that. When's the last time you #### your pants? Been awhile?

And at 2:50 :

After finishing a long story about ####ing his pants ends it with "true story" and turns to someone else and asks "who's the pitchers in this game?"

Good stuff.

 
Was walking with my daughter Abby (age: 2.5) downtown today. Lots of people around. She looks up at me and says, "Daddy, I don't like people."

I've never been so proud.

 
General Malaise said:
You can get great pre-pre school for kids for far less than that, GB. At least, in my personal experience you can. Is she at boarding school?
Click to expand...
No, but they're really, really, good. I love the school and what it's done for her, and I knew it was a lot per month, but doing the math on a whole year is kidn of stunning.
 
Dr. Awesome said:
Fingerpainting costs that much?
Click to expand...
It's more than that. She knows like, everything and she's just two and a half. She knows her times tables through the nines, most of the periodic elements, that the novels of Susan Sontag are self-indulgent, overrated crap, and yesterday she started laughing at somebody who said, "My head is literally exploding right now." I think it's worth it.
 
Definitely getting the kid a leg up, but doooooooood....$17,000?!? For ####### PRE- pre-school?

I wish I had that kind of cheese, Christ!

 
Frostillicus said:
I just did the math on how much I'm spending per year on Abby's pre-pre-school. $17k. I'm an idiot.
Click to expand...
We're spending less than $15K on Chloe's Second Steps preschool.In Manhattan.Yes, I believe you are. ;)If it makes you feel any better, I spend $28K on mensa kid. Gifted school. Wanna guess what the best part is? Turns out there's a bell curve everywhere in life, from cradle to the grave. I've spent almost $60K the last two years to find out my gifted kid isn't actually all that gifted.
 
General Malaise said:
desert rose said:
I witnessed a grab and dash robbery at Walgreen's today.
Click to expand...
You gotta do better than that. Details, teacher..details.
Click to expand...
I had been tooling about, searching for a can of Planters Brittle Nut Medley, becuase my cousin gave it out to his guests at Christmas dinner, and I think it's just about the yummiest snack ever. I had already hit a grocery store and Big Lots. And even though I'd scored some buffalo flavored cashews, I still hadn't fulfilled my quest for even more calories than the feasting, cookies and egg nog. It was a blustery day, with big fluffy snowflakes swirling around me. I pulled up to Walgreen's. Usually I park across the lot, but I noticed that there was an empty space in front of the Red Box, so I pulled in and jumped out of the car and hurried over to beat anyone else since there was only one Red Box there. After tapping my way through the $5 sale, comedies, romance, drama, and top 20, in that order, and finding nothing appealing, I dropped the screen shade and turned to walk up the side of the building and toward the door. As I drew near, I noticed a young hispanic male, with a close cropped hair cut sprint out of the store with his arms around a number of loose items. Simultaneously, a beat up car with a missing grill that had been backed into the space against a wall leaped toward the young man, who dropped all he was holding and half jumped onto the hood of the car. For a split second, I thought it was someone hitting a pedestrian, until she shrieked out the driver's side window, "Get in the car, a**hole!!!" He bent down quickly, gathered up his items, and jumped into the drivers side as she slid over. At this point, I stopped and stared at them, as did a man who was converging on the door at the same time as I was. The car peeled out of the parking lot, and I walked in the store as the doors opened. The cashier near the door calmly told the manager as he walked over that someone had just walked out with a lot of stuff. The manager asked the cashier what he took. She said some things I didn't hear. The man I entered with said he had seen them leave, and I walked over to the food looking for my Brittle Nut Medley, which they didn't have.
 
Last edited by a moderator:
desert rose said:
General Malaise said:
desert rose said:
I witnessed a grab and dash robbery at Walgreen's today.
Click to expand...
You gotta do better than that. Details, teacher..details.
Click to expand...
I had been tooling about, searching for a can of Planters Brittle Nut Medley, becuase my cousin gave it out to his guests at Christmas dinner, and I think it's just about the yummiest snack ever. I had already hit a grocery store and Big Lots. And even though I'd scored some buffalo flavored cashews, I still hadn't fulfilled my quest for even more calories than the feasting, cookies and egg nog. It was a blustery day, with big fluffy snowflakes swirling around me. I pulled up to Walgreen's. Usually I park across the lot, but I noticed that there was an empty space in front of the Red Box, so I pulled in and jumped out of the car and hurried over to beat anyone else since there was only one Red Box there. After tapping my way through the $5 sale, comedies, romance, drama, and top 20, in that order, and finding nothing appealing, I dropped the screen shade and turned to walk up the side of the building and toward the door. As I drew near, I noticed a young hispanic male, with a close cropped hair cut sprint out of the store with his arms around a number of loose items. Simultaneously, a beat up car with a missing grill that had been backed into the space against a wall leaped toward the young man, who dropped all he was holding and half jumped onto the hood of the car. For a split second, I thought it was someone hitting a pedestrian, until she shrieked out the driver's side window, "Get in the car, a**hole!!!" He bent down quickly, gathered up his items, and jumped into the drivers side as she slid over. At this point, I stopped and stared at them, as did a man who was converging on the door at the same time as I was. The car peeled out of the parking lot, and I walked in the store as the doors opened. The cashier near the door calmly told the manager as he walked over that someone had just walked out with a lot of stuff. The manager asked the cashier what he took. She said some things I didn't hear. The man I entered with said he had seen them leave, and I walked over to the food looking for my Brittle Nut Medley, which they didn't have.
Click to expand...
Nice effort but it needs more poop.
 
Frostillicus said:
General Malaise said:
You can get great pre-pre school for kids for far less than that, GB. At least, in my personal experience you can. Is she at boarding school?
Click to expand...
No, but they're really, really, good. I love the school and what it's done for her, and I knew it was a lot per month, but doing the math on a whole year is kidn of stunning.
Click to expand...
I always paid for the whole year in advance to take advantage of the 3% discount. :goodposting: But the whole year was like 7 grand. For two children.But my kids read books about boogers and despite their father's occupation in a company that specializes in buying many of the periodical metals your daughter can recite by memory, would probably tell you that Uranium was located near the crack in your butt. So, I'm guessing the money is worth it.
 
Last edited by a moderator:
General Malaise said:
My kids are going to beat the hell out of your smart kids.Even the gay one. :goodposting:
Click to expand...
My kids 7th grade soccer team blows; they went like 2-19 this year. So on a rare weekend when I got to see him play (he lives 650 miles away), they got mercy ruled, something like 9-0. I feel just awful; I was on mostly good baseball teams growing up, but I remember one team they went around .500 and it drove me crazy. Couldn't imagine being on a team that loses consistently. Gotta just beat up your self-esteem. I'm seriously concerned about how to handle this.So I decide to take him to Chipotle and talk things out. Figure this should be a great teaching moment.Father BL: You know, you learn a lot through adversity. When things are going smooth, when its all going your way, you don't really find out much about yourself. But when you struggle-Son Bo: Umm...sorry...are you trying to make me feel better?Father BL: Well, yeah...ya know, I know how competitive you are, and I know it must be hard losing all the time.Son Bo (smiling): We actually have a tradition of losing. We're used to it. And it doesn't matter. Father BL: WHATTAYAMEAN IT DOESN'T MATTER?!!1!Son Bo: Dad, it's cool. When we grow up, those guys who beat us today are going to working for us.:smartaleck:
 
bentley said:
desert rose said:
General Malaise said:
desert rose said:
I witnessed a grab and dash robbery at Walgreen's today.
Click to expand...
You gotta do better than that. Details, teacher..details.
Click to expand...
I had been tooling about, searching for a can of Planters Brittle Nut Medley, becuase my cousin gave it out to his guests at Christmas dinner, and I think it's just about the yummiest snack ever. I had already hit a grocery store and Big Lots. And even though I'd scored some buffalo flavored cashews, I still hadn't fulfilled my quest for even more calories than the feasting, cookies and egg nog. It was a blustery day, with big fluffy snowflakes swirling around me. I pulled up to Walgreen's. Usually I park across the lot, but I noticed that there was an empty space in front of the Red Box, so I pulled in and jumped out of the car and hurried over to beat anyone else since there was only one Red Box there. After tapping my way through the $5 sale, comedies, romance, drama, and top 20, in that order, and finding nothing appealing, I dropped the screen shade and turned to walk up the side of the building and toward the door.

As I drew near, I noticed a young hispanic male, with a close cropped hair cut sprint out of the store with his arms around a number of loose items. Simultaneously, a beat up car with a missing grill that had been backed into the space against a wall leaped toward the young man, who dropped all he was holding and half jumped onto the hood of the car. For a split second, I thought it was someone hitting a pedestrian, until she shrieked out the driver's side window, "Get in the car, a**hole!!!" He straightened up, pulled the band down of his boxers that were prominently displayed above his waistband tightly belted below his buttcheeks. A large, brown turd fell out and stuck vertically on the asphalt. He bent down quickly, barely avoiding the now steaming log, gathered up his items, and jumped into the drivers side as she slid over.

At this point, I stopped and stared at them, as did a man who was converging on the door at the same time as I was. The car peeled out of the parking lot, and I walked in the store as the doors opened. The cashier near the door calmly told the manager as he walked over that someone had just walked out with a lot of stuff and that she was scared ####less and had soiled her pants. The manager asked the cashier what he took. She said some things I didn't hear. The man I entered with said he had seen them leave, and I walked over to the food looking for my Brittle Nut Medley, which they didn't have.
Click to expand...
Nice effort but it needs more poop.
Click to expand...
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

General Malaise
GM's Thread About Everything/GM's Thread About Nothing
1852 1853 1854
Replies
93K
Views
3M
El Floppo
El Floppo
T
***Official 2014 GMTAN Draft Thread***
34 35 36
Replies
2K
Views
43K
El Floppo
El Floppo
Early_10
***Official*** Seinfeld draft thread
25 26 27
Replies
1K
Views
35K
The Dreaded Marco
The Dreaded Marco

Users who are viewing this thread

Total: 11 (members: 0, guests: 11)
Back
Top