GM's thread about nothing (52 Viewers)

[Disco Stu]

Vulva.

 

[Abraham]

My 3 year old noticed some items in her stocking yesterday and immediately asked how they got there. Grasping for an answer I told her the elf might have brought them or contact Santa and maybe he sent them. Which started the conversation again about where the elf keeps his phone to call Santa and what kind of phone is it and does he play angry birds on the phone...

You even fill her stocking an item a day?

No. Wife handles it all and adds items as she buys them. It's hanging up on the mantle so I didn't expect she'd notice.

 

[Bogart]

Had to make a interesting decision last night.

My aunt sends me a text, telling me that my grandfather is in the hospital. This is my mom's stepfather, but the closest thing she had as to a Dad, even though he was very abusive to her as a kid which affected her for the rest of her life. For this reason among others, I was never very close to him. I would see him on holidays and other times my mom would force the family together. Once my mom and step dad passed away, this side of the family really means nothing to me anymore. They are not good people.

That said, family is family and I could take an hour out of my evening to check on the old *******. So I get to the hospital and he is all alone in his room. A beat up, destroyed version of the guy I use to watch fill out a horse betting form in the newspaper while smoking a pipe. He has to wear a catheter all the time now, and apparently he pulled it out at home, and caused all kinds of damage and infection. When I get there, he asks the nurse for a pain pill which she says she will bring to him right away. While she is getting it, he digs into his nightstand, pulls out a small bottle and tips it back into his mouth. I ask him what that was and he says, "pain pill". The nurse comes in and soon gives him another pain pill and something for his infection. He asks for a sleeping pill and she says they don't give sleeping pills at that hospital and they would make him comfortable. As soon as she leaves, he starts fishing in his nightstand again, and finally finds a baggie of pills, sleeping pills of course. Takes one and settles in.

I'm torn at this point. I want this old man to be comfortable, but I don't want something happening to him and the blame falling to the hospital. I leave and walk around the hospital a bit, finally going back up to his floor, finding his nurse, and telling her about his secret stash. She didn't even blink an eye, called him "a sneaky one" and asked if I wanted to take the contraband with me. I said no, I didn't even want him to know it was me that ratted on him, and if she would just go and get them once he was asleep.

In the end, I was pissed at him for even putting me in that position, so I didn't as bad about my decision.

 

[trogg78]

My 3 year old noticed some items in her stocking yesterday and immediately asked how they got there. Grasping for an answer I told her the elf might have brought them or contact Santa and maybe he sent them. Which started the conversation again about where the elf keeps his phone to call Santa and what kind of phone is it and does he play angry birds on the phone...

You even fill her stocking an item a day?

Nailed it.

And that's why we converted and started celebrating Hannakkuh!

They have Mensch on a bench for us Jews. Maybe it will go on sale soon.

 

[Limp Ditka]

My 3 year old noticed some items in her stocking yesterday and immediately asked how they got there. Grasping for an answer I told her the elf might have brought them or contact Santa and maybe he sent them. Which started the conversation again about where the elf keeps his phone to call Santa and what kind of phone is it and does he play angry birds on the phone...

You even fill her stocking an item a day?

Nailed it.

Great news!

 

[Abraham]

Gm - southwest about to start offering atx direct to Portland.

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

Had to make a interesting decision last night.

My aunt sends me a text, telling me that my grandfather is in the hospital. This is my mom's stepfather, but the closest thing she had as to a Dad, even though he was very abusive to her as a kid which affected her for the rest of her life. For this reason among others, I was never very close to him. I would see him on holidays and other times my mom would force the family together. Once my mom and step dad passed away, this side of the family really means nothing to me anymore. They are not good people.

That said, family is family and I could take an hour out of my evening to check on the old *******. So I get to the hospital and he is all alone in his room. A beat up, destroyed version of the guy I use to watch fill out a horse betting form in the newspaper while smoking a pipe. He has to wear a catheter all the time now, and apparently he pulled it out at home, and caused all kinds of damage and infection. When I get there, he asks the nurse for a pain pill which she says she will bring to him right away. While she is getting it, he digs into his nightstand, pulls out a small bottle and tips it back into his mouth. I ask him what that was and he says, "pain pill". The nurse comes in and soon gives him another pain pill and something for his infection. He asks for a sleeping pill and she says they don't give sleeping pills at that hospital and they would make him comfortable. As soon as she leaves, he starts fishing in his nightstand again, and finally finds a baggie of pills, sleeping pills of course. Takes one and settles in.

I'm torn at this point. I want this old man to be comfortable, but I don't want something happening to him and the blame falling to the hospital. I leave and walk around the hospital a bit, finally going back up to his floor, finding his nurse, and telling her about his secret stash. She didn't even blink an eye, called him "a sneaky one" and asked if I wanted to take the contraband with me. I said no, I didn't even want him to know it was me that ratted on him, and if she would just go and get them once he was asleep.

In the end, I was pissed at him for even putting me in that position, so I didn't as bad about my decision.

Poor old *******. That's dirty pool, bro.



Nevermind, #### him.

 

[Frostillicus]

After Krista's order my wife has now made over $400 dollars this year. Gross, not profit after materials purchased. That represents over a 100% increase vs. last year!

Congrats! I was cool with how I paid 67% more than listed prices!

Seriously?

Odd. I will investigate.

 

[krista4]

After Krista's order my wife has now made over $400 dollars this year. Gross, not profit after materials purchased. That represents over a 100% increase vs. last year!

Congrats! I was cool with how I paid 67% more than listed prices!

Seriously?

Odd. I will investigate.

It's OK, really. On her Etsy site, they are $15. Maybe she has GM mail them and ends up paying $10 for shipping.

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

After Krista's order my wife has now made over $400 dollars this year. Gross, not profit after materials purchased. That represents over a 100% increase vs. last year!

Congrats! I was cool with how I paid 67% more than listed prices!

Seriously?

Odd. I will investigate.

DEMAND IS HIGH. PRICES ARE RISING.

 

[Leeroy Jenkins]

After Krista's order my wife has now made over $400 dollars this year. Gross, not profit after materials purchased. That represents over a 100% increase vs. last year!

Congrats! I was cool with how I paid 67% more than listed prices!

Seriously?

Odd. I will investigate.

It's OK, really. On her Etsy site, they are $15. Maybe she has GM mail them and ends up paying $10 for shipping.

Can't you just buy these at Whole Foods or other local places? My wife has like 3 of those little blue bottles of something; some for relaxation and one that's anti-bruising or something.

 

[Bob Sacamano]

It's one of those pay according to your ability to do so setups.

 

[Aaron Rudnicki]

It's OK, really. On her Etsy site, they are $15. Maybe she has GM mail them and ends up paying $10 for shipping.

Can't you just buy these at Whole Foods or other local places? My wife has like 3 of those little blue bottles of something; some for relaxation and one that's anti-bruising or something.

she's buying a custom winter hat made by Mrs Frosty. I don't think Whole Foods carries those yet

 

[Guster]

Had to make a interesting decision last night.

My aunt sends me a text, telling me that my grandfather is in the hospital. This is my mom's stepfather, but the closest thing she had as to a Dad, even though he was very abusive to her as a kid which affected her for the rest of her life. For this reason among others, I was never very close to him. I would see him on holidays and other times my mom would force the family together. Once my mom and step dad passed away, this side of the family really means nothing to me anymore. They are not good people.

That said, family is family and I could take an hour out of my evening to check on the old *******. So I get to the hospital and he is all alone in his room. A beat up, destroyed version of the guy I use to watch fill out a horse betting form in the newspaper while smoking a pipe. He has to wear a catheter all the time now, and apparently he pulled it out at home, and caused all kinds of damage and infection. When I get there, he asks the nurse for a pain pill which she says she will bring to him right away. While she is getting it, he digs into his nightstand, pulls out a small bottle and tips it back into his mouth. I ask him what that was and he says, "pain pill". The nurse comes in and soon gives him another pain pill and something for his infection. He asks for a sleeping pill and she says they don't give sleeping pills at that hospital and they would make him comfortable. As soon as she leaves, he starts fishing in his nightstand again, and finally finds a baggie of pills, sleeping pills of course. Takes one and settles in.

I'm torn at this point. I want this old man to be comfortable, but I don't want something happening to him and the blame falling to the hospital. I leave and walk around the hospital a bit, finally going back up to his floor, finding his nurse, and telling her about his secret stash. She didn't even blink an eye, called him "a sneaky one" and asked if I wanted to take the contraband with me. I said no, I didn't even want him to know it was me that ratted on him, and if she would just go and get them once he was asleep.

In the end, I was pissed at him for even putting me in that position, so I didn't as bad about my decision.

You're good people Bogart. I wouldn't have even bothered going

 

[Leeroy Jenkins]

Can't you just buy these at Whole Foods or other local places? My wife has like 3 of those little blue bottles of something; some for relaxation and one that's anti-bruising or something.

she's buying a custom winter hat made by Mrs Frosty. I don't think Whole Foods carries those yet

Oh, my bad. I thought this was essential oils chat.

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

Can't you just buy these at Whole Foods or other local places? My wife has like 3 of those little blue bottles of something; some for relaxation and one that's anti-bruising or something.

she's buying a custom winter hat made by Mrs Frosty. I don't think Whole Foods carries those yet

Oh, my bad. I thought this was essential oils chat.

That gig came to a glorious end. On to the next one.

 

[Bob Sacamano]

Can't you just buy these at Whole Foods or other local places? My wife has like 3 of those little blue bottles of something; some for relaxation and one that's anti-bruising or something.

she's buying a custom winter hat made by Mrs Frosty. I don't think Whole Foods carries those yet

She needs to get in touch with someone who can MAKE IT RAIN and knows how to make things happen in the produce business.

 

[krista4]

Had to make a interesting decision last night.

My aunt sends me a text, telling me that my grandfather is in the hospital. This is my mom's stepfather, but the closest thing she had as to a Dad, even though he was very abusive to her as a kid which affected her for the rest of her life. For this reason among others, I was never very close to him. I would see him on holidays and other times my mom would force the family together. Once my mom and step dad passed away, this side of the family really means nothing to me anymore. They are not good people.

That said, family is family and I could take an hour out of my evening to check on the old *******. So I get to the hospital and he is all alone in his room. A beat up, destroyed version of the guy I use to watch fill out a horse betting form in the newspaper while smoking a pipe. He has to wear a catheter all the time now, and apparently he pulled it out at home, and caused all kinds of damage and infection. When I get there, he asks the nurse for a pain pill which she says she will bring to him right away. While she is getting it, he digs into his nightstand, pulls out a small bottle and tips it back into his mouth. I ask him what that was and he says, "pain pill". The nurse comes in and soon gives him another pain pill and something for his infection. He asks for a sleeping pill and she says they don't give sleeping pills at that hospital and they would make him comfortable. As soon as she leaves, he starts fishing in his nightstand again, and finally finds a baggie of pills, sleeping pills of course. Takes one and settles in.

I'm torn at this point. I want this old man to be comfortable, but I don't want something happening to him and the blame falling to the hospital. I leave and walk around the hospital a bit, finally going back up to his floor, finding his nurse, and telling her about his secret stash. She didn't even blink an eye, called him "a sneaky one" and asked if I wanted to take the contraband with me. I said no, I didn't even want him to know it was me that ratted on him, and if she would just go and get them once he was asleep.

In the end, I was pissed at him for even putting me in that position, so I didn't as bad about my decision.

You're good people Bogart. I wouldn't have even bothered going

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

Had to make a interesting decision last night.

My aunt sends me a text, telling me that my grandfather is in the hospital. This is my mom's stepfather, but the closest thing she had as to a Dad, even though he was very abusive to her as a kid which affected her for the rest of her life. For this reason among others, I was never very close to him. I would see him on holidays and other times my mom would force the family together. Once my mom and step dad passed away, this side of the family really means nothing to me anymore. They are not good people.

That said, family is family and I could take an hour out of my evening to check on the old *******. So I get to the hospital and he is all alone in his room. A beat up, destroyed version of the guy I use to watch fill out a horse betting form in the newspaper while smoking a pipe. He has to wear a catheter all the time now, and apparently he pulled it out at home, and caused all kinds of damage and infection. When I get there, he asks the nurse for a pain pill which she says she will bring to him right away. While she is getting it, he digs into his nightstand, pulls out a small bottle and tips it back into his mouth. I ask him what that was and he says, "pain pill". The nurse comes in and soon gives him another pain pill and something for his infection. He asks for a sleeping pill and she says they don't give sleeping pills at that hospital and they would make him comfortable. As soon as she leaves, he starts fishing in his nightstand again, and finally finds a baggie of pills, sleeping pills of course. Takes one and settles in.

I'm torn at this point. I want this old man to be comfortable, but I don't want something happening to him and the blame falling to the hospital. I leave and walk around the hospital a bit, finally going back up to his floor, finding his nurse, and telling her about his secret stash. She didn't even blink an eye, called him "a sneaky one" and asked if I wanted to take the contraband with me. I said no, I didn't even want him to know it was me that ratted on him, and if she would just go and get them once he was asleep.

In the end, I was pissed at him for even putting me in that position, so I didn't as bad about my decision.

You're good people Bogart. I wouldn't have even bothered going

I would have gone.

And swiped the old guy's drugs.

 

[Frostillicus]

Can't you just buy these at Whole Foods or other local places? My wife has like 3 of those little blue bottles of something; some for relaxation and one that's anti-bruising or something.

she's buying a custom winter hat made by Mrs Frosty. I don't think Whole Foods carries those yet

Oh, my bad. I thought this was essential oils chat.

We're out of the oils biz.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

Can't you just buy these at Whole Foods or other local places? My wife has like 3 of those little blue bottles of something; some for relaxation and one that's anti-bruising or something.

she's buying a custom winter hat made by Mrs Frosty. I don't think Whole Foods carries those yet

Oh, my bad. I thought this was essential oils chat.

We're out of the oils biz.

my link

 

[Abraham]

So my coworker and I were talking about "Marconi plays the Mamba" in the Starship song "we Built this city" which naturally led to a forty minute discussion of the movie "Mannequin" with Kim Catrell and Andrew McCarthy. During the conversation I did a little research and learned that Grace Slick is SEVENTY ####### FOUR YEARS OLD.

Oh my.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

Get it off! Get it off!

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

So my coworker and I were talking about "Marconi plays the Mamba" in the Starship song "we Built this city" which naturally led to a forty minute discussion of the movie "Mannequin" with Kim Catrell and Andrew McCarthy. During the conversation I did a little research and learned that Grace Slick is SEVENTY ####### FOUR YEARS OLD.

Oh my.

Jimi Hendrix would be 71 this year. Jim Morrison would be 70. Seems like yesterday I was checking out the Doors at the Whiskey.

 

[Frostillicus]

How do you know if your son is actually gay, or if he's just being a little brother and copying his big sister like most younger siblings do at 3 years old?

 

[Sammy3469]

How do you know if your son is actually gay, or if he's just being a little brother and copying his big sister like most younger siblings do at 3 years old?

Ask GM

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

How do you know if your son is actually gay, or if he's just being a little brother and copying his big sister like most younger siblings do at 3 years old?

Have you tried asking him?

 

[Leeroy Jenkins]

How do you know if your son is actually gay, or if he's just being a little brother and copying his big sister like most younger siblings do at 3 years old?

My brother played dress-up, my little pony, and barbies with my sister. He also only liked pretty girls (if you were an ugly teacher or something, he hated you), and then later in life obsessed about the spice girls, Brittany spears, and his favorite x-man was Storm. Also, musicals instead of sports. 100% gay now, and we all just knew forever.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

It's funny because it's true (peanut butter cup related)

I was just sitting there and then all of a sudden Frank ran in, started wigging out, and then bailed. It was weird. (cat related)

Why Mittens was fired (more cats)

Sproooiiing! (mas gato)

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

My sister has a son that's 8-9 that I think might have caught the gay. He could just be odd though. He has some weird mannerisms and really likes to play with/hug/wrestle with my 4 year old son.

 

[Abraham]

How do you know if your son is actually gay, or if he's just being a little brother and copying his big sister like most younger siblings do at 3 years old?

My brother played dress-up, my little pony, and barbies with my sister. He also only liked pretty girls (if you were an ugly teacher or something, he hated you), and then later in life obsessed about the spice girls, Brittany spears, and his favorite x-man was Storm. Also, musicals instead of sports. 100% gay now, and we all just knew forever.

My super-manly BIL has an 8 year old son that I think is gay. I would never say anything like that to anyone, but I won't be the least bit surprised when the kid that loves to dance and hates hunting and cries six times a day for some ridiculous reason ends up liking dudes.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

How do you know if your son is actually gay, or if he's just being a little brother and copying his big sister like most younger siblings do at 3 years old?

My brother played dress-up, my little pony, and barbies with my sister. He also only liked pretty girls (if you were an ugly teacher or something, he hated you), and then later in life obsessed about the spice girls, Brittany spears, and his favorite x-man was Storm. Also, musicals instead of sports. 100% gay now, and we all just knew forever.

There was a kid that lived in the neighborhood when my older brothers and sister were little. His name was Pat. He always wanted to play "mom" when the girls played "house". He was obsessed with his mother's clothes and make-up. As a teen he worked as a tranny prostitute in order to fund his sex-change operation (which he had when he was about 20). I think he has the hivvy now.

Your kid is probably OK though, Frosty.

 

[Frostillicus]

How do you know if your son is actually gay, or if he's just being a little brother and copying his big sister like most younger siblings do at 3 years old?

Have you tried asking him?

He said no.

He does like sports, video games, cars, sharks, and dinosaurs so he's probably not, it's just that he was doing his mom's hair like his sister always does.

 

[Leeroy Jenkins]

How do you know if your son is actually gay, or if he's just being a little brother and copying his big sister like most younger siblings do at 3 years old?

Have you tried asking him?

He said no.

He does like sports, video games, cars, sharks, and dinosaurs so he's probably not, it's just that he was doing his mom's hair like his sister always does.

Keep an eye on him. If he asks to have his nails painted like his sister's, then you may have a problem.

 

[Abraham]

How do you know if your son is actually gay, or if he's just being a little brother and copying his big sister like most younger siblings do at 3 years old?

My brother played dress-up, my little pony, and barbies with my sister. He also only liked pretty girls (if you were an ugly teacher or something, he hated you), and then later in life obsessed about the spice girls, Brittany spears, and his favorite x-man was Storm. Also, musicals instead of sports. 100% gay now, and we all just knew forever.

There was a kid that lived in the neighborhood when my older brothers and sister were little. His name was Pat. He always wanted to play "mom" when the girls played "house". He was obsessed with his mother's clothes and make-up. As a teen he worked as a tranny prostitute in order to fund his sex-change operation (which he had when he was about 20). I think he has the hivvy now.

Your kid is probably OK though, Frosty.

I had a friend in 6th grade that thought it was totally normal for boys to shower together. Spent the night at his house once. did not shower. Did not go back.

Turned out gay, obviously.

 

[Annyong]

My kid's like skeletons and monster trucks.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

How do you know if your son is actually gay, or if he's just being a little brother and copying his big sister like most younger siblings do at 3 years old?

My brother played dress-up, my little pony, and barbies with my sister. He also only liked pretty girls (if you were an ugly teacher or something, he hated you), and then later in life obsessed about the spice girls, Brittany spears, and his favorite x-man was Storm. Also, musicals instead of sports. 100% gay now, and we all just knew forever.

There was a kid that lived in the neighborhood when my older brothers and sister were little. His name was Pat. He always wanted to play "mom" when the girls played "house". He was obsessed with his mother's clothes and make-up. As a teen he worked as a tranny prostitute in order to fund his sex-change operation (which he had when he was about 20). I think he has the hivvy now.

Your kid is probably OK though, Frosty.

I had a friend in 6th grade that thought it was totally normal for boys to shower together. Spent the night at his house once. did not shower. Did not go back.

Turned out gay, obviously.

But we still accept you, GB.

 

[Abraham]

How do you know if your son is actually gay, or if he's just being a little brother and copying his big sister like most younger siblings do at 3 years old?

My brother played dress-up, my little pony, and barbies with my sister. He also only liked pretty girls (if you were an ugly teacher or something, he hated you), and then later in life obsessed about the spice girls, Brittany spears, and his favorite x-man was Storm. Also, musicals instead of sports. 100% gay now, and we all just knew forever.

There was a kid that lived in the neighborhood when my older brothers and sister were little. His name was Pat. He always wanted to play "mom" when the girls played "house". He was obsessed with his mother's clothes and make-up. As a teen he worked as a tranny prostitute in order to fund his sex-change operation (which he had when he was about 20). I think he has the hivvy now.

Your kid is probably OK though, Frosty.

I had a friend in 6th grade that thought it was totally normal for boys to shower together. Spent the night at his house once. did not shower. Did not go back.

Turned out gay, obviously.

But we still accept you, GB.

They probably hadn't yet invented "gay" when you were in 6th grade.

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

How do you know if your son is actually gay, or if he's just being a little brother and copying his big sister like most younger siblings do at 3 years old?

Have you tried asking him?

He said no.

He does like sports, video games, cars, sharks, and dinosaurs so he's probably not, it's just that he was doing his mom's hair like his sister always does.

Keep an eye on him. If he asks to have his nails painted like his sister's, then you may have a problem. boy with an interesting lifestyle.

 

[Ignoramus]

My kid's like skeletons and monster trucks.

It is?

 

[Annyong]

My kid's like skeletons and monster trucks.

It is?

yes

 

[Annyong]

shut up

 

[Ignoramus]

shut up

 

[Thorn]

So my coworker and I were talking about "Marconi plays the Mamba" in the Starship song "we Built this city" which naturally led to a forty minute discussion of the movie "Mannequin" with Kim Catrell and Andrew McCarthy. During the conversation I did a little research and learned that Grace Slick is SEVENTY ####### FOUR YEARS OLD.

Oh my.

Jimi Hendrix would be 71 this year. Jim Morrison would be 70. Seems like yesterday I was checking out the Doors at the Whiskey.

Nirvana got nominated for the Rock and Roll HOF today. I remember when their first album came out. :(

 

[General Malaise]

Let me ask you this: Who initiates the naked jump parties at your house, Frost? We can go from there.

K-man got accepted into the Summa program for middle school next year. Pretty proud of him, gay or no. Though his inclusion into this program is confirmation that he's probably not my son by blood.

 

[Thorn]

It's funny because it's true (peanut butter cup related)

Sounds like amateur hour to me.

 

[Thorn]

Do you think we will get to a point where gay people won't even have to "come out" anymore?

 

[Annyong]

I've called my kid "K-Man" before. I'm not proud of it.

 

[General Malaise]

Do you think we will get to a point where gay people won't even have to "come out" anymore?

Wouldn't they much prefer to come in?

HEY OH!

 

[General Malaise]

I've called my kid "K-Man" before. I'm not proud of it.

Does his name start with the letter K? Do you watch Seinfeld? Are you a nickname guy?