How many times do you fart in a day? (1 Viewer)

[Zegras11]

Well....

 

[MAC_32]

Average probably isn't double digits, but if I make certain diet choices one day we're counting in dozens sometime in the near future.  Voted 6-10, but it seems like more.

 

[xulf]

I went 3-5, but don't keep a record book.

 

[Zegras11]

I went 3-5, but don't keep a record book.

Around 8 years old, my friend Greg and I decided to count one day.   We considered every bubble to be one, so a good long one could count as 15 to 20.  We both reached a little over 500.  

 

[ZenoRazon]

I was under the impression this place was all worried about quality threads, guess not!

Farting???

 

[ZenoRazon]

Maybe this place isn't for you. bye bye

Actually it's perfect, a place all worried about quality threads, with farting considered quality.

Ya gotta love it, ha~~~~~~

 

[Dan Lambskin]

I fart a lot

 

[shuke]

Around 8 years old, my friend Greg and I decided to count one day.   We considered every bubble to be one, so a good long one could count as 15 to 20.  We both reached a little over 500.  

You counted the bubbles??

 

[Poke_4_Life]

I'm eating a lot of veggies, fruits, and nuts right now.  Eating healthy makes me fart a ton.  I'd say 20+ before noon.  

 

[Zegras11]

You counted the bubbles??

We tried.  Sometimes we had to say like, "that's a 12," and we would agree and add it to the total.  

 

[Don't Noonan]

We kept a #### chart in college.  I lived on a house with three roommates.  I was the low man averaging .66 ####s a day.

As for farting, I am pretty sure I had them all beat.  Guessing 30-40 farts a day on average.

 

[ShamrockPride]

We kept a #### chart in college.  I lived on a house with three roommates.  I was the low man averaging .66 ####s a day.

As for farting, I am pretty sure I had them all beat.  Guessing 30-40 farts a day on average.

This is what you guys did in the 80s?

In resume: "Retired professional crap charter"

 

[Kanil]

I dunno… maybe once an hour?  Chose 10-20.

 

[rockaction]

Too many. 

 

[Galileo]

Based on my experience today, I need to revise my original answer upwards...

 

[ZenoRazon]

Hell, now I finally see my problem, here I was talking about books, sports, music, silly me.

I should have.....

What was your longest fart?

Ever thought it was fart but was wrong?

What guitar lick comes closest to sounding like your farts?

Ever record a fart?

Ever fart while making love?

Ever fart as a group?

How loud was your loudest fart?

Ever fart at a wedding?

Ad on and on and on....

 

[ShamrockPride]

at was your longest fart?

Ever thought it was fart but was wrong?

What guitar lick comes closest to sounding like your farts?

Ever record a fart?

Ever fart while making love?

Ever fart as a group?

How loud was your loudest fart?

Ever fart at a wedding?

Ad on and on and on....

   

I'm just picturing in my head a huge group of people gathering to break the Guinness Record for World's Largest Group Fart.

 

[Chaka]

Too many. 

Not enough.

 

[Hoh]

How much time has to elapse between farts to be considered separate farts, and not just continuation farts/aftershocks?

 

[Chaka]

Hell, now I finally see my problem, here I was talking about books, sports, music, silly me.

I should have.....

What was your longest fart?

Ever thought it was fart but was wrong?

What guitar lick comes closest to sounding like your farts?

Ever record a fart?

Ever fart while making love?

Ever fart as a group?

How loud was your loudest fart?

Ever fart at a wedding?

Ad on and on and on....

Okay, I'll play.

1) Never timed one but I'm guessing 4-5 seconds.

2) Yup (interestingly I would not put that in your "Embarasshing moments" thread(

3) It's really much closer to a percussion instrument.

4) Thought about it but never remember to when I am on a solid roll.

5) Not intentionally but yup.

6) Not as a group but in a group.

7) I don't carry a decibel meter so not really sure.

Don't remember but I have probably slow played a few silent ones or crop dusted a few tables.

This is fun.

 

[ZenoRazon]

Okay, I'll play.

1) Never timed one but I'm guessing 4-5 seconds.

2) Yup (interestingly I would not put that in your "Embarasshing moments" thread(

3) It's really much closer to a percussion instrument.

4) Thought about it but never remember to when I am on a solid roll.

5) Not intentionally but yup.

6) Not as a group but in a group.

7) I don't carry a decibel meter so not really sure.

Don't remember but I have probably slow played a few silent ones or crop dusted a few tables.

This is fun.

4-5 seconds?  So a footballer could run a 40 as you farted the whole run?

I;m stunned.

You need a t shirt or something, that was pretty impressive.

 

[Chaka]

4-5 seconds?  So a footballer could run a 40 as you farted the whole run?

I;m stunned.

You need a t shirt or something, that was pretty impressive.

And think about how hard that guy had to train to run the 40 that quickly. 

 

[ZenoRazon]

And think about how hard that guy had to train to run the 40 that quickly. 

Or, how can it take 4-5 seconds to fart?

 

[Chaka]

Or, how can it take 4-5 seconds to fart?

You asked how long was your longest fart, not your average fart. 

 

[ZenoRazon]

You asked how long was your longest fart, not your average fart. 

There is no average fart, each one is unique.

 

[opensourcebeer]

I gotta rich inner life.

 

[Chaka]

There is no average fart, each one is unique.

 

[Todem]

Easily 10 plus times a day.....hell when I wake up...I rip at least 4-5 before I even get out of bed.

Fart multiple times in my office.....have a nice supply of frebreeze in my desk. Keep stick matches on my night table to spare the wife and she does retaliate sometimes....and she has some real nose hair burning moments too.

Yeah I fart a #### ton every day and don’t give a rats ###. Feels damn good.

 

[Chaka]

Easily 10 plus times a day.....hell when I wake up...I rip at least 4-5 before I even get out of bed.

Fart multiple times in my office.....have a nice supply of frebreeze in my desk. Keep stick matches on my night table to pare the wife.

Yeah I fart a #### ton every day and don’t give a rats ###. Feels damn good.

And they're funny. Every single one.

 

[parasaurolophus]

I am a vegetarian that drinks a lot of soda and almost never burp. 

 

[Mister CIA]

I fart a lot

Me too.

 

[The General]

some day a few times. But other days it's like one continuos fart I'm just holding in. 

 

[Chaka]

In optimistic for tomorrow. High fiber day, lots of veggies, pre and probiotics. I'll try to remember to have my phone recording app open all day.

 

[mr roboto]

I'm eating a lot of veggies, fruits, and nuts right now.  Eating healthy makes me fart a ton.  I'd say 20+ before noon.  

Huh. I fart when I eat carbs. Not fruit and veggies. 

 

[AAABatteries]

Huh. I fart when I eat carbs. Not fruit and veggies. 

  fruit and veggies have carbs but I get where you are heading with that.  I fart when I eat beans and high fiber food 

 

[Cjw_55106]

   

I'm just picturing in my head a huge group of people gathering to break the Guinness Record for World's Largest Group Fart.

https://youtu.be/MDVrmSEZEKg

 

[sports_fan]

Voted once or twice, but it's not unusual for me to go a full day without floating an air biscuit

 

[Dan Lambskin]

Huh. I fart when I eat carbs. Not fruit and veggies. 

I used to eat a fiber one bar for breakfast fairly often, took awhile to figure out they were giving me explosive gas

 

[That one guy]

Man, now I gotta get Popeye’s for dinner tonight