Is there a problem here? (1 Viewer)

[lumpy19]

Unfortunately it sounds like your husband has a problem. He's not gambling enough. If he started with $200 3 years ago and has never reloaded he's the best gambler in the history of the world and he needs to dedicate more time to it.

 

[[icon]]

Start hiding bitcoins

I have no idea what a bitcoin is

PM JoJo the Circus Clown... He's got an amazing opportunity for you!

He can reload via Western Union or Moneygram, Daisy. It would be easy to keep that from a spouse.

He could but I would see money missing from our bank account and I balance the budget and have yet to see anything missing

GB naive women... It is astoundingly easy to pigeonhole "shared" money. Expense report checks, "picking up tabs" and collecting cash from buddies, just setting aside walking around cash, etc.

That said he's a grown ### man and if he's got a hobby that comes out of his "allowance" (so to speak) then it really doesn't matter if he's setting it on fire. Should be his "spending money". Sounds like you're being cool with it as long as it doesn't impact the family finances... so everything seems cool.

 

[Gr00vus]

I am not close to a being psychologist, so my opinion isn't worth much here. That said, betting every day on football/basketball sounds like a gambling problem to me. The stakes don't really matter.

Do people who have a beer or a glass of wine every night with dinner have a drinking problem?

Sorry I missed this yesterday - is it still bad analogy time? Could you maybe try a car related one?

 

[[icon]]

Frequency shouldn't be what makes you conclude there is a problem either. I know people that will go a week without a drink but then pound a fifth of whiskey. True story.

Truth

He hasn't been to Vegas since your baby was born, cut down the casino trips drastically and quit a poker league. It sounds like he is cutting down his gambling time away from the house - you should take that as a positive.

Let him enjoy his sports. You don't see a significant amount of money missing from any accounts so let it be. It's something for him to do while he has at home.

If he starts spending every second on his phone and away from being a father/husband at the casino or poker then it is a problem.

If anything, it sounds like he has been trying to grow up since your new addition.

If he's there for your and his child (and that doesn't include having his face buried in a phone/TV/laptop 75% of the time... and if he's not noticeably pulling money from family finances, then you're likely in the clear.

Unless he's selling drugs or BJ's on the side and using THAT money to find his gambling.

Or perhaps you actually have a conversation with your husband, you might find that is better than posting it on a message board.

I wish it was that easy, like I want to start a fight on a hobby. I mean everything costs money, but if he is responsible about it then who cares. How would you react if your wife/husband came to you and asked you if you had a problem with gambling or something that you liked to do and you didn't think you did?

I know it's difficult for some women to understand, but there's ways to bring up a topic with out being confrontational or judgmental. If you come at him with "Honey, you bet too much and think you have a problem" you better believe he's going to take two steps back and go on the defensive. You seem like a reasonably intelligent woman so I'll let you figure out the best way to approach it to where he DOESN'T feel like you're confronting him.

 

[jon_mx]

I would be more worried about all the hookers and strippers he is spending his winnings on.

 

[Good Posting Judge]

I am not close to a being psychologist, so my opinion isn't worth much here. That said, betting every day on football/basketball sounds like a gambling problem to me. The stakes don't really matter.

Do people who have a beer or a glass of wine every night with dinner have a drinking problem?

Sorry I missed this yesterday - is it still bad analogy time? Could you maybe try a car related one?

There are plenty of responsible gamblers who get money down every night, myself included. How is that different?

 

[msudaisy26]

Maybe ask if you can bet like $5 on a few March Madness games? Get involved, ask what he's betting on, etc. Do you know who Harvey Klinger is?

That is kind of how I got caught up in fantasy football. I am hooked now.

 

[T Bell]

I am curious if my husband has a gambling problem. Let me start by saying we don't have any money problems, but I wonder if we may have future money problems. I am not sure how to explain how he gamble so here is a list.

10 to 15 fantasy football leagues (this is the first year he actually lost money at the end of the year that I can remember, he was down about 500 bucks he said)

1 or 2 fantasy basketball leagues (He just started last year, I am not sure how he has done in them they are cheap leagues)

1 or 2 trips to Vegas each year (although there hasn't been a trip since I got pregnant back in September of 2012)

on average 1 trip to the local casinos a month (since our child has been born he has only went 2 times in 9 months)

he bowls 1 night a week and gets into jackpots and bets 5 dollars a game against 2 of his friends

he has money on a sports betting site, which he places bets every night during football and basketball season (he started with 200 dollars about 3 years ago and has never reloaded, I know this because I do the bills and have never seen a charge except the original one)

he also used to play in a poker league, but he quit this year because knew he would travel a lot for work and to save some money because of the new baby.

I am not sure if I should be worried or not. I never really cared before because it was just us. Now we have a baby to think about and I would like to stop a problem before it happens, but I also don't want to make him made because he seems to have it under control and it is just a hobby.

What do you all think?

Good one! Who is this?

I honestly don't think he has reloaded. We only have a bank card and one credit card. If he has reloaded it is on another card he has secretly and has sent to a PO box or something.

He can reload via Western Union or Moneygram, Daisy. It would be easy to keep that from a spouse.

oh yeah or have buddies do it.

I guess he could have done it that way. He does have buddies that like to gamble with him and go to the casino with him.

I bet they hit the titter afterwards too..amirite?

No, that's when he goes to church to thank God for his wonderful marriage and all of his gambling winnings.

 

[Aaron Rudnicki]

I am not close to a being psychologist, so my opinion isn't worth much here. That said, betting every day on football/basketball sounds like a gambling problem to me. The stakes don't really matter.

Do people who have a beer or a glass of wine every night with dinner have a drinking problem?

Sorry I missed this yesterday - is it still bad analogy time? Could you maybe try a car related one?

how is that a bad analogy?

betting a nickel/day also a problem? where is the cutoff?

 

[pollardsvision]

Nobody ever has a gambling problem. Only a losing problem.

 

[msudaisy26]

Unfortunately it sounds like your husband has a problem. He's not gambling enough. If he started with $200 3 years ago and has never reloaded he's the best gambler in the history of the world and he needs to dedicate more time to it.

He was watching basketball last night and I asked him who he bet on and he told me the players names and the games he bet on. We watched a while and he was a little bummed and I asked him if he lost and he said he had a bad night. I asked how bad and he said he lost like 70 bucks. I then asked if was all he had left and he said no I still have 180 of the 200 I started with.

 

[Good Posting Judge]

Unfortunately it sounds like your husband has a problem. He's not gambling enough. If he started with $200 3 years ago and has never reloaded he's the best gambler in the history of the world and he needs to dedicate more time to it.

He was watching basketball last night and I asked him who he bet on and he told me the players names and the games he bet on. We watched a while and he was a little bummed and I asked him if he lost and he said he had a bad night. I asked how bad and he said he lost like 70 bucks. I then asked if was all he had left and he said no I still have 180 of the 200 I started with.

I don't think you have to worry.

 

[Long Ball Larry]

I am not close to a being psychologist, so my opinion isn't worth much here. That said, betting every day on football/basketball sounds like a gambling problem to me. The stakes don't really matter.

Do people who have a beer or a glass of wine every night with dinner have a drinking problem?

Sorry I missed this yesterday - is it still bad analogy time? Could you maybe try a car related one?

Do people who drive a car every day have a driving problem? I mean, other than johnnycakes's wife.

 

[msudaisy26]

I am curious if my husband has a gambling problem. Let me start by saying we don't have any money problems, but I wonder if we may have future money problems. I am not sure how to explain how he gamble so here is a list.

10 to 15 fantasy football leagues (this is the first year he actually lost money at the end of the year that I can remember, he was down about 500 bucks he said)

1 or 2 fantasy basketball leagues (He just started last year, I am not sure how he has done in them they are cheap leagues)

1 or 2 trips to Vegas each year (although there hasn't been a trip since I got pregnant back in September of 2012)

on average 1 trip to the local casinos a month (since our child has been born he has only went 2 times in 9 months)

he bowls 1 night a week and gets into jackpots and bets 5 dollars a game against 2 of his friends

he has money on a sports betting site, which he places bets every night during football and basketball season (he started with 200 dollars about 3 years ago and has never reloaded, I know this because I do the bills and have never seen a charge except the original one)

he also used to play in a poker league, but he quit this year because knew he would travel a lot for work and to save some money because of the new baby.

I am not sure if I should be worried or not. I never really cared before because it was just us. Now we have a baby to think about and I would like to stop a problem before it happens, but I also don't want to make him made because he seems to have it under control and it is just a hobby.

What do you all think?

Good one! Who is this?

I honestly don't think he has reloaded. We only have a bank card and one credit card. If he has reloaded it is on another card he has secretly and has sent to a PO box or something.

He can reload via Western Union or Moneygram, Daisy. It would be easy to keep that from a spouse.

oh yeah or have buddies do it.

I guess he could have done it that way. He does have buddies that like to gamble with him and go to the casino with him.

I bet they hit the titter afterwards too..amirite?

No, that's when he goes to church to thank God for his wonderful marriage and all of his gambling winnings.

That is sweet, but no he doesn't go to church lol.

 

[Hang 10]

Maybe ask if you can bet like $5 on a few March Madness games? Get involved, ask what he's betting on, etc. Do you know who Harvey Klinger is?

That is kind of how I got caught up in fantasy football. I am hooked now.

So it's you that has the problem. You are posting here after all.

 

[T Bell]

I am curious if my husband has a gambling problem. Let me start by saying we don't have any money problems, but I wonder if we may have future money problems. I am not sure how to explain how he gamble so here is a list.

10 to 15 fantasy football leagues (this is the first year he actually lost money at the end of the year that I can remember, he was down about 500 bucks he said)

1 or 2 fantasy basketball leagues (He just started last year, I am not sure how he has done in them they are cheap leagues)

1 or 2 trips to Vegas each year (although there hasn't been a trip since I got pregnant back in September of 2012)

on average 1 trip to the local casinos a month (since our child has been born he has only went 2 times in 9 months)

he bowls 1 night a week and gets into jackpots and bets 5 dollars a game against 2 of his friends

he has money on a sports betting site, which he places bets every night during football and basketball season (he started with 200 dollars about 3 years ago and has never reloaded, I know this because I do the bills and have never seen a charge except the original one)

he also used to play in a poker league, but he quit this year because knew he would travel a lot for work and to save some money because of the new baby.

I am not sure if I should be worried or not. I never really cared before because it was just us. Now we have a baby to think about and I would like to stop a problem before it happens, but I also don't want to make him made because he seems to have it under control and it is just a hobby.

What do you all think?

Good one! Who is this?

I honestly don't think he has reloaded. We only have a bank card and one credit card. If he has reloaded it is on another card he has secretly and has sent to a PO box or something.

He can reload via Western Union or Moneygram, Daisy. It would be easy to keep that from a spouse.

oh yeah or have buddies do it.

I guess he could have done it that way. He does have buddies that like to gamble with him and go to the casino with him.

I bet they hit the titter afterwards too..amirite?

No, that's when he goes to church to thank God for his wonderful marriage and all of his gambling winnings.

That is sweet, but no he doesn't go to church lol.

You're adorable.

 

[Cyclones]

How many checks have you deposited into the bank from the offshore gambling account that he hasn't reloaded in 2 years? If he hasn't reloaded, that means he is winning big, unless he is betting nickels on games...and I don't mean 5 hunny at a time.

I think the more likely scenario is that he's finding other ways to reload the account without you knowing about it.

My diagnosis? Degenerate. Start hiding money.

 

[mquinnjr]

How many checks have you deposited into the bank from the offshore gambling account that he hasn't reloaded in 2 years? If he hasn't reloaded, that means he is winning big, unless he is betting nickels on games...and I don't mean 5 hunny at a time.

I think the more likely scenario is that he's finding other ways to reload the account without you knowing about it.

My diagnosis? Degenerate. Start hiding money.

"Honey, let me try it, I want to be a part of the action. Log me in and show me how to make a bet so we can cheer it on together!"

(Account summary > transaction history)

Best of luck!

 

[DocHolliday]

This is stupid. If the wife does not see a lot of money missing, there is not a gambling problem. Everyone has a vice or hobby. That is why we work. Not ALL of the money has to go towards the family fund.

 

[Gr00vus]

I am not close to a being psychologist, so my opinion isn't worth much here. That said, betting every day on football/basketball sounds like a gambling problem to me. The stakes don't really matter.

Do people who have a beer or a glass of wine every night with dinner have a drinking problem?

Sorry I missed this yesterday - is it still bad analogy time? Could you maybe try a car related one?

Do people who drive a car every day have a driving problem? I mean, other than johnnycakes's wife.

Now you're talking.

 

[IvanKaramazov]

$70, eh. T&P.

 

[xulf]

Is the problem his snoopy wife?

Booyah!

 

[Juxtatarot]

Have you seen his credit report? He might be hiding debts from you. It's always a good idea to check one of your reports once a year since it's free (annualcreditreport.com) to check for errors. Talk to him getting your reports for that reason, but do it for checking up on him too. If he balks at the idea from the start, you know there's a problem.

 

[msudaisy26]

Have you seen his credit report? He might be hiding debts from you. It's always a good idea to check one of your reports once a year since it's free (annualcreditreport.com) to check for errors. Talk to him getting your reports for that reason, but do it for checking up on him too. If he balks at the idea from the start, you know there's a problem.

We bought a new house last year and both of our credit scores were right around 800.

 

[Johnny Rock]

How many checks have you deposited into the bank from the offshore gambling account that he hasn't reloaded in 2 years? If he hasn't reloaded, that means he is winning big, unless he is betting nickels on games...and I don't mean 5 hunny at a time.

I think the more likely scenario is that he's finding other ways to reload the account without you knowing about it.

My diagnosis? Degenerate. Start hiding money.

I was also wondering where the winnings are going. If he loses $70 his bankroll isn't the same $200 for multiple years. High rollers here might not think it's a lot but it is relative and he may be underplaying it.

He's probably reloading but he doesn't want you to worry because it's his fun money. Might not be a problem. But if he's going to great lengths to hide it maybe it is.

I think a well-thought out non-accusatory conversation would reveal a lot as others have mentioned. But before you do that just trust your intuition and casually watch his behavior, non-verbals, etc. with the knowledge you've gained from this thread. It's amazing what you see by observing.

 

[charvik]

Feel free to drop into the GMTAN so that we can all get to know you better.

Good people over there. And they gamble on curling, e.g., that's code for ANYTHING. You'll feel pretty good about your husband after observing them for a few weeks.

What's wrong with curling?

 

[Good Posting Judge]

Have you seen his credit report? He might be hiding debts from you. It's always a good idea to check one of your reports once a year since it's free (annualcreditreport.com) to check for errors. Talk to him getting your reports for that reason, but do it for checking up on him too. If he balks at the idea from the start, you know there's a problem.

We bought a new house last year and both of our credit scores were right around 800.

Not that it's definitive or anything, but I would bet that there's a strong correlation between people who can gamble responsibly and have a good credit score.

 

[mquinnjr]

I am curious if my husband has a gambling problem. Let me start by saying we don't have any money problems, but I wonder if we may have future money problems. I am not sure how to explain how he gamble so here is a list.

10 to 15 fantasy football leagues (this is the first year he actually lost money at the end of the year that I can remember, he was down about 500 bucks he said)

1 or 2 fantasy basketball leagues (He just started last year, I am not sure how he has done in them they are cheap leagues)

1 or 2 trips to Vegas each year (although there hasn't been a trip since I got pregnant back in September of 2012)

on average 1 trip to the local casinos a month (since our child has been born he has only went 2 times in 9 months)

he bowls 1 night a week and gets into jackpots and bets 5 dollars a game against 2 of his friends

he has money on a sports betting site, which he places bets every night during football and basketball season (he started with 200 dollars about 3 years ago and has never reloaded, I know this because I do the bills and have never seen a charge except the original one)

he also used to play in a poker league, but he quit this year because knew he would travel a lot for work and to save some money because of the new baby.

I am not sure if I should be worried or not. I never really cared before because it was just us. Now we have a baby to think about and I would like to stop a problem before it happens, but I also don't want to make him made because he seems to have it under control and it is just a hobby.

What do you all think?

Who is...Eminence?

 

[jon_mx]

Eminence? He will be 30 before he even gets out of the friend zone with a girl.