I've Decided To Make A Movie... (1 Viewer)

[Jefferson the Caregiver]

...about this board and the motley cast of characters that post here.

I believe that this has the makings of a great American documentary. Nobody has done a movie about a group of strangers who share thoughts on a message board yet but we have what it takes in this forum to make something pretty interesting. From a sociological perspective, we have some titillating cats here.

In the next week I am going to go through some of our more memorable and prolific threads and poach quotes and posts to bring to the script and screen.

So this is a just heads up, you may get a PM from me soon and if so I am going to be asking for access on you and your household for a weekend. I am going to want to interview you and catch you in your everyday being, and make your character come to life for America to meet.

Obviously this is going to be pretty low budget so you don't have to worry about me bringing in an invasive crew. Most likely it will just be me and a video camera, but where I am going to be depending on the rest of you is to stir up some provoking stuff on this board during the weekends where I am doing my shoots. I want to capture the posters in their actual frame of mind when they are bringing it on FBG.com.

There will be a major cornhole at some point, details to follow. I am hoping that it can be sort of both a celebration and a climax to what could prove to be some very entertaining cinema.

This has a chance to be both painfully scary and comical at the same time and I am excited about this project.

 

[Jefferson the Caregiver]

I know some of you are probably not going to want to be filmed in your essence but let me be clear, we will not be using any real names in this movie. You will be known as your footballguy handle only and that is how you will be listed in the credits. Yes those close to you, are going to recognize you but I am not asking you to be anything but yourself and they should already be familiar with those complexities and oddities.

In the case of Bryant and Dodds and possibly Tremblay, I may need to make an exception. I do think it will lend an aura of credibility if I can use your full nomen appelature and since you guys are the straight shooters on this board, that will be necesary. Not that this whole movie won't be real but I think the audience is going to have a hard time believing some of you exist.

Some themes I am going to be exploring..

The Russian Bride Draft

Capturing the Mood on the board the morning of 9/11, your posts that day

I am going to need the rights to some of these love triangles

The passing of an internet friend

Tasting the Flesh

Psychological profiles of your typical FFA poster vs your Shark Pool Guys

The Lhucksian controversies and how he created a legion of haters

What was going through your mind during your first cornhole, nervous, excited? How you felt afterward. Dirty, sick, the launching of a real friendship?

Board wars

The trials and tribulations of the Mad Sceintist- Cosjobs- and his business schemes

The tuna incident and how you reacted when your wife took your Tommy Bahamas to the wrong drycleaner

10 minute interview with Mr Ham- I won't ask any questions, I am expecting a full monologue for the entire 10 minutes

Religious debates and threads- meet the participants

Spotlighting some threads where there has been heated debate and filming a couple of the participants when they are meeting for the first time in real life

You are at the Canadian border, customs is asking a lot of questions and you have to explain how you and the FBG in the car know each other

There has to be one feel good story, maybe the way the board came together during Katrina?

 

[wilked]

haha, you serious?

 

[Jefferson the Caregiver]

haha, you serious?

Absolutely. This board has so much material, writing it will be easy. Filming a bit tougher, I don't have much experience in that area and then I know some of you will be reluctant stars but I am going to need you.

 

[the moops]

Good stuff. And good luck.

 

[wilked]

haha, you serious?

Absolutely. This board has so much material, writing it will be easy. Filming a bit tougher, I don't have much experience in that area and then I know some of you will be reluctant stars but I am going to need you.

you taking time off work?

 

[Jefferson the Caregiver]

haha, you serious?

Absolutely. This board has so much material, writing it will be easy. Filming a bit tougher, I don't have much experience in that area and then I know some of you will be reluctant stars but I am going to need you.

you taking time off work?

At this point, it is going to be a weekend only project.I will probably hit some major hubs first, probably do a meet and greet with several FBGs at once and if we have material and you are ready to go, continue on with the individual filmings in the various households.

 

[Sarnoff]

I think I'm going to make a movie that consists entirely of Christopher Walken reading Studs n' Duds' posts.

 

[BRONG]

The interview with Ministry of Pain should be good. Bring extra batteries.

 

[Homer J Simpson]

Do I have to wear a shirt during filming?

 

[Hastur]

What are your thoughts as to the actual filming? Interviewing while subject sits at the computer posting? A story board style, or documentary?

 

[Jefferson the Caregiver]

What are your thoughts as to the actual filming? Interviewing while subject sits at the computer posting? A story board style, or documentary?

Well this is a documentary. I am not making any of this up. I expect mostly this will be sort of a psychological or sociological look at the makeup of this site.As far as the rest, it is going to be a mixed bag of stuff. There will be one background arc as I follow a thread in progress and continue on to meet some of the participants. But the main gist is going to be bringing these FBG handles and the post history to life, interviews, interviews with friends, capturing the mood when you post and possible activities where I can bring several FBGs together at once.

 

[SofaKings]

Awesome!

 

[E Street Brat]

I want Brad Pitt to play me.

 

[Jedi Knight]

You ought to interview wives/SO's. I'm sure they have an interesting perspective on the time we spend here.

Then again.........

 

[prosopis]

Do I have to wear a shirt during filming?

What about pants?

 

[BRONG]

That kaa guy, that's one I wanna see.

 

[bentley]

I'm up for a cornhole at cosjobs' place. I'll be working on my line.

"Theses pretzels are making ME thirsty."

 

[Jefferson the Caregiver]

That kaa guy, that's one I wanna see.

I am going to work on securing him soon.

 

[Postradamus]

 

[awesomeness]

Did Morgan Freeman get back to you about possibly being the narrator?

 

[cstu]

I think I'm going to make a movie that consists entirely of Christopher Walken reading Studs n' Duds' posts.

That I'd pay to see.

 

[Giant Wooden Badger]

I'm up for a cornhole at cosjobs' place. I'll be working on my line."Theses pretzels are making ME thirsty."

You're doing it wrong."These PRETZELS....are making me thirsty."

 

[Leroy Hoard]

So the whole movie is going to be cut shots of different guys typing?

 

[Foosball God]

So the whole movie is going to be cut shots of different guys typing?

There will be awesome special effects and CGI though.

 

[Leroy Hoard]

So the whole movie is going to be cut shots of different guys typing?

There will be awesome special effects and CGI though.

I guess that will help.

 

[Foosball God]

So the whole movie is going to be cut shots of different guys typing?

There will be awesome special effects and CGI though.

I guess that will help.

Probably some of that Matrix style camera work where the camera swings around so that we get every possible angle as Woz hits the ENTER key with finality.

 

[Tybeeman]

Clever idea. Good luck!

 

[bigbottom]

Soundtrack?

We're fairly flexible on contract terms (so long as we all make enough to retire comfortably). Feel free to have your lawyers draw something up and I'll have our people take a look.

 

[Foosball God]

Soundtrack?

We're fairly flexible on contract terms (so long as we all make enough to retire comfortably). Feel free to have your lawyers draw something up and I'll have our people take a look.

Our people = Bobby Sac?

 

[bigbottom]

Soundtrack?

We're fairly flexible on contract terms (so long as we all make enough to retire comfortably). Feel free to have your lawyers draw something up and I'll have our people take a look.

Our people = Bobby Sac?

Are you kidding? Bobby Sac is a lyrical genius, but he couldn't negotiate his way out of a wet paper bag. Woz has agreed to represent us in the contract talks.

 

[Foosball God]

Soundtrack?

We're fairly flexible on contract terms (so long as we all make enough to retire comfortably). Feel free to have your lawyers draw something up and I'll have our people take a look.

Our people = Bobby Sac?

Are you kidding? Bobby Sac is a lyrical genius, but he couldn't negotiate his way out of a wet paper bag. Woz has agreed to represent us in the contract talks.

And people say you're nothing but a pretty voice.

 

[Bull Dozier]

What about the psycological aspects of some of the more major fishing trips and alias inventions?

 

[Giant Wooden Badger]

So the whole movie is going to be cut shots of different guys typing?

Football Guys don't type. They dictate.

 

[Rayderr]

Seems to me, you're missing out on the gold threads.

The Letspoker rise and fall and indictment

The CA Hold'em experiment

The eat-off

The Iron Shiek's costanza-like employment for the oil company

The Wheelhouse incident

just to name a few.

 

[Nick Vermeil]

Seems to me, you're missing out on the gold threads.The Letspoker rise and fall and indictmentThe CA Hold'em experimentThe eat-offThe Iron Shiek's costanza-like employment for the oil companyThe Wheelhouse incidentjust to name a few.

Not to mention threads where we replace one word in movie titles with "Vajayjay." That should be the core of the film, you know, for the indie circuit.

 

[Jefferson the Caregiver]

Thanks for all the PMs and suggestions, you have been very encouraging.

Some of you have asked why this would even be interesting to viewers from the outside.

I used to think that way myself but it is obvious now that America craves reality based theatre. It's also become obvious that it doesn't even matter if the cast has a movie star aura about them.. If you create an interesting enough storyline and have real life characters that have engrossing idiosyncrasies, you can create a succesful documentary.

 

[Jefferson the Caregiver]

So the whole movie is going to be cut shots of different guys typing?

The interviews are going to be the gold mines. Digging up past threads and doing some investigative stuff on the participants will be the drama. Seeing a guy type his posts in live, is going to be but a very small part of it as I agree that would get boring quick.

 

[Rayderr]

So the whole movie is going to be cut shots of different guys typing?

The interviews are going to be the gold mines. Digging up past threads and doing some investigative stuff on the participants will be the drama. Seeing a guy type his posts in live, is going to be but a very small part of it as I agree that would get boring quick.

You should watch 24 Hours On Craigslist. It's basically what you're trying to do, but with Criagslist instead of FBG.

 

[Baloney Sandwich]

So the whole movie is going to be cut shots of different guys typing?

The interviews are going to be the gold mines. Digging up past threads and doing some investigative stuff on the participants will be the drama. Seeing a guy type his posts in live, is going to be but a very small part of it as I agree that would get boring quick.

You should watch 24 Hours On Craigslist. It's basically what you're trying to do, but with Criagslist instead of FBG.

I was going to post the same thing, JTC will probably react like the guys in Knocked Up when they discovered Mr. Skin was already doing their project with a better name.

 

[RedmondLonghorn]

Or it could be like the King of Kong, only without guys that are really good at Donkey Kong.

 

[Brock Middlebrook]

BibBottom can probably contribute to the soundtrack

"don't fear the pooper" can play as the closing credits roll...

 

[General Malaise]

What in the hell type of drugs did you find at Rockingham?

 

[Limp Ditka]

The interview with Ministry of Pain should be good. Bring extra batteries.

And use them like he's an opposing outfielder at a Phillies game.

 

[Wrigley]

This is going to be a porn, right?

Ops, wrong board

:e:

 

[B-Deep]

I think I'm going to make a movie that consists entirely of Christopher Walken reading Studs n' Duds' posts.

wowthis would be awesome

 

[Bob Sacamano]

Soundtrack?

We're fairly flexible on contract terms (so long as we all make enough to retire comfortably). Feel free to have your lawyers draw something up and I'll have our people take a look.

Our people = Bobby Sac?

Yeah, with access to the likes of scoob and fatguy, he's going to let the dubm guy do his negotiating. biggie's a LITTLE smarter than this.

 

[Bob Sacamano]

Soundtrack?

We're fairly flexible on contract terms (so long as we all make enough to retire comfortably). Feel free to have your lawyers draw something up and I'll have our people take a look.

Our people = Bobby Sac?

Are you kidding? Bobby Sac is a lyrical genius, but he couldn't negotiate his way out of a wet paper bag. Woz has agreed to represent us in the contract talks.

I stand corrected.

 

[Sheriff Bart]

I want GM to play me.

 

[Sarnoff]

I think I'm going to make a movie that consists entirely of Christopher Walken reading Studs n' Duds' posts.

wowthis would be awesome

Looking into it. If not Christopher Walken, I think I'm going to find asians that do Walken impressions to do dramatic readings.