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Loaning a chick money 9/9/16 - Bye (1 Viewer)

Sand said:
Baloney Sandwich said:
Folks with PhDs that haven't graduated from

medical school but refer to themselves as doctors are easily some of the biggest dbags out there.
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The honorific goes with the degree (PhD, MD, and DDS/DMD, for that matter) whether they are dbags or not.
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I have no problem with that and it is one thing for someone else to refer to them as doctor but when they do it themselves it is a joke. Our old babysitter just got her PhD in physical therapy, if she ever starts to call herself a doctor I'm going to stop thinking about her when I masturbate.

 
Baloney Sandwich said:
Sand said:
Baloney Sandwich said:
Folks with PhDs that haven't graduated from

medical school but refer to themselves as doctors are easily some of the biggest dbags out there.
Click to expand...
The honorific goes with the degree (PhD, MD, and DDS/DMD, for that matter) whether they are dbags or not.
Click to expand...
I have no problem with that and it is one thing for someone else to refer to them as doctor but when they do it themselves it is a joke. Our old babysitter just got her PhD in physical therapy, if she ever starts to call herself a doctor I'm going to stop thinking about her when I masturbate.
Click to expand...
The only thing hotter than a hot physical therapist is a hot Dr. physical therapist. I think you've caught the gay here.

 
Baloney Sandwich said:
Folks with PhDs that haven't graduated from medical school but refer to themselves as doctors are easily some of the biggest dbags out there.
Click to expand...
I have nothing against med school, but it's just one kind of graduate school. If you think it's toolish for people to refer to themselves as Dr. So-and-So, you should be consistent and apply that to MDs as well.

Actually I know very few MDs who throw out that title in public. (Edit: To be fair, my n = 2 here).

 
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Arizona Ron said:
- The Wife

Who ####### knows. We’re distant. She now complains because I’m traveling a lot again and the burden of Angie moving out has made it worse. Angie still helps but she’s living in Skinny Jean’s house as of today.
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She have a lot of friends over now? It just sounds like the two of you are single but living under the same roof. Not so much that you have an open relationship, its that you have no relationship.

 
phi·lan·der·er

fəˈlandərər/

noun

a man who readily or frequently enters into casual sexual relationships with women; a womanizer.

"he was known as a philanderer"

synonyms: womanizer, Casanova, Don Juan, Lothario, flirt, ladies' man,

 
I'm not sure I understand the update - did you have sex with the psychologist?

It's almost like Homer gave the keys to the Arizona Ron alias to Crosseyed.

 
So you Dr haters what did you call your profs in college? Both my parents have PhDs and my dad also has an MD. What should each be referred to as?

 
Honestly, the problem I've run into is when I do have time to write, so much has happened that I get hung up on the backstory.

I think I need to just post an update and fill in any backstory as requested.

I miss being judged and ridiculed.

 
Arizona Ron said:
Honestly, the problem I've run into is when I do have time to write, so much has happened that I get hung up on the backstory.

I think I need to just post an update and fill in any backstory as requested.

I miss being judged and ridiculed.
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I was stupefied to learn this morning you don't eat bacon.

 
McGarnicle said:
Just give us a story where you bang some chick, no backstory needed.
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:goodposting: there is a reason they don't make pornos with plots anymore. Just bypass all the bs and get straight to the action!

 
Arizona Ron said:
Honestly, the problem I've run into is when I do have time to write, so much has happened that I get hung up on the backstory.

I think I need to just post an update and fill in any backstory as requested.

I miss being judged and ridiculed.
Click to expand...
Come on, Ron.

Just ****-tate the events that have transpired and ask one of your other side pieces in another town to type it out so you can post it later. Or, just use Elance...lol

 
We will take whatever you give us. I do like the background but something is better than nothing :excited:

Please include Angie and what you were wearing :heart:

 
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One rule: when you get to the good part, you must use the phrase "like she owed me money". It literally cannot be a bad story if you include that phrase.

Also, you'll be inspired to fill in the backstory after all the feedback you get from the initial hook. Watch any serial TV show nowadays, that's how it's done.

:popcorn:

 
[SIZE=medium]The weather is starting to break; I can finally run outside without looking like a stand-in for the next Tron movie. I’m not a hardcore runner, just 3 miles to get the heart pumping. I have a few maps that I’ve tracked on my phone app – 1.5ish miles out and back. Some days I run the whole 3, other days it’s a walk/run mix (with mostly walking); it usually starts off with by convincing myself that I’m only going to walk then it turns into a run.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]It’s about 9am; I decided to take a few weeks off from the grind of work travel to recharge. I hit the 1.5 mile mark and turned around to head home…I saw what I thought it was someone’s dog wondering toward me but the cat-like ears suggested otherwise…it was a fox. :shock: The fox is about a Ritz cracker throw away (meaning an unmodified Ritz cracker throw which is unaided by topography or wind), from me but my body immediately goes into fight/flight mode and I start running back home.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]While running, my brain is racing with these collective thoughts all at once: (a) I’ve been on this route a thousand times, never seen a fox. (b) I don’t think foxes should be out during the day. © it’s rabid and wants to kill me. (e) my ankle hurts (f) I must look like an idiot[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]I round the corner down my street cutting through my neighbor’s unfenced yard; I head to the front door of my house, then pause and run around the back. I ordered the Ice Princess’s dog (who is our new house guest) in the house and yelled (erratically) once I got inside, “no one go outside!!!”…”Fox!”[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]Angie and my daughter look up from playing Hungry Hungy Hippos, for a moment, looking at me like I’m a crazy person :mellow: :mellow: ; they pause…then keep playing.

My wife walks into the family room,[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]Wife: WTF is wrong with you? [/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]Me: There is a rabid fox wandering around![/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]Angie: Rabid? How do you know that?[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]Me: It’s daytime, foxes don’t hang out during the day (confidentially)[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]Angie: It’s breeding season, it’s not rare to see them during the day. Maybe you startled it. :yawn: [/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]My wife walks back into the kitchen mumbling something about me “needing help”. My daughter is still playing Hippos and Angie is looking at me like I’ve lost it.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]I gather my thoughts with my new best friend, “Chuckie”, the Ice Princess’ labradoodle. The Ice Princess (a.k.a Girl 3, a.k.a, the chick that shoved a water bottle up my ###) has been “busy” lately so she drops the dog off Friday and picks him up Monday. My daughter said the dog could stay at our house; this was decided when I was away on travel. Whatever.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]Turns out the Ice Princess and my wife had made up (from me “accidentally” allowing her to post pictures wearing my wife’s jewelry while attending a work-social with me). Girl 1 is back around too; not at the house so much but they are hanging out again.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]Later that night, Angie has my daughter covered for the night and my Wife wants to go out and see the Ice Princess – at her “show” – “what ####### show?”, I ask.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]So, miss “I hate men”, miss “I don’t need anyone”, miss “I’m always in control”, miss “I’m an attention whore”…is now stripping…makes sense.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]This entitled little snot is stripping now; she’s apparently pretty popular at it too - hence why her dog now resides at my house on the weekends. My wife and Girl 1 are all excited about seeing her on stage and can’t wait; what doesn’t make sense to me (well because I’m not hot and don’t have a ######) is why? Her parents are loaded, she has their house to herself, she does some drugs but not “real” drugs. Why strip?[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]So we go to see here, Wife, Girl 1 and I; we get there and get comfortable. Bring a woman to a strip club and they immediately get a LOT of attention. Ice hasn’t even gone on stage yet and she’s already wrangling other strippers over to meet “her #####es”. Ice Princess looks smoking hot; neon green fishnet outfit with neon green panties and top, ridiculously high heal glass shoes. Her hair is shaved on the sides and is colored bright blonde, almost white. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]I played the bar, watching with the rest of the girls as Ice, my wife and Girl 1 are center of attention near the edge of the stage while some random stripper was dancing. Ice is grinding on my wife and Girl 1 (side note, my wife and Girl 1 were slapping her on the ### and biting her nipples – no guy would get away with doing that in a strip club near center stage, ever). The more I stood there with my drink watching…the more I thought “I’m either really good at this…or the biggest ####### idiot in the world”.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]Ice brought a girl over to me while I was on my 4th[/SIZE] or 5[SIZE=small]th[/SIZE] drink, leans into me saying, “this is Chaos, she wants to #### you”. Chaos is a hot mid 20s black chick, looks like a Rihanna with too many tattoos.

[SIZE=medium]I said I’ll do a dance with her (as an aside, every guy should know the difference between going to the “dance” section of a strip club and the VIP/champagne section of the club – one cost about 5 times more than the other; guess which one I ended up in…).[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]My dumb/drunk ### follows Chaos to VIP; we were prepped with a bottle of vodka. Chaos starts dancing and pouring me and herself shots of Ciroc,…minutes go buy while indulging.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]She says to me more than once, “do you want to #### me”, (WTF would any guy say? Of course)[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]One security dude is around the front of the room but hasn’t walked in; I’m not sure if he’s guarding the room or keeping me in…Chaos unzips my pants and begins blowing me, extremely well; it’s clear I’m far from her first ####### (maybe not even her first ####### that night). Chaos then pulls a condom out of her little purse, I think to myself that there’s no way I’ll be able to bust one with a condom on. She puts it on me then straddles me. She leans in, chest to chest, while moving like a snake on me and says in my ear, “shhhh, don’t move, I got this…(while moaning)” then says, “cum inside my little tight ##### daddy”). I may have made it a solid 4 minutes, maybe. Let's be honest, I don't need to impress this chick with my ####-game.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]We get done and Chaos wants to get paid, “$500”, she says nonchalantly. I only had three one-hundred dollar bills and a bunch of ones that I got as change from the bar; so I made the walk of shame to the ATM to get her the other $200. I don’t argue or haggle with strippers; it just doesn’t end well. I paid her, she high-fives the Ice Princess while walking back through the club. :own3d: [/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]I regroup with my Wife and Girl 1; at this point the Ice Princess is on stage giving her performance and of course my wife and Girl 1 are throwing dollars at her. By the end of her dance, she’s completely naked dancing to “What does the Fox say” – as a last ditch dig to me about running from a fox that morning. My wife and Girl 1 are drunk poking fun at me during the whole song like, “look, fox behind you!”. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]During our Uber black-car ride home, we’re all pretty drunk; my wife says, “did you hook up with that stripper (Chaos)?” I said, “No way, who has sex with a stripper, let alone in a club???”. My wife says, “well for $500, she should have ####ed you, made you a sandwich and drove us home” (I never told my wife how much I paid for my “dance”, clearly Ice Princess was blabbing her mouth again).[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium] :wolf: [/SIZE]

 
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