What's new
Fantasy Football - Footballguys Forums

This is a sample guest message. Register a free account today to become a member! Once signed in, you'll be able to participate on this site by adding your own topics and posts, as well as connect with other members through your own private inbox!

Loaning a chick money 9/9/16 - Bye (1 Viewer)

bushdocda said:
eoMMan said:
No discussion of price before hand? You just give her half a rack like nothing? What if she said $1,000?
Click to expand...
Good question. I get the no price talk before but what if she had said a rack or two after?
Click to expand...
do you guys ask how much a drink is before you order it?

If I order a beer, I expect to pay between $4-$8 depending on where I am - if it's outside of my expectations, I readjust said expectation or don't buys there anymore.

There are enough lawyers here to explain the 'reasonable' aspect of this. If I ask for a beer, drink it and the bar says I owe them $1000 for that one beer - no way that holds up. Go into a VIP, on a weekend for bottle service, $500 is about right

 
mr fancypants said:
Yankee23Fan said:
Ok, so the basic premise is - you and your wife still have 1-3 concubines in the house, apparantly no more set rules or understandings of any kind, and all went to a strip joint where it is abundantly clear that the wife and the concubines (#1, #2, #3 or #50 it doesn't matter) basically got you laid with yet another potential concubine for the mix and you didn't tell the truth about yet another sex partner in an open sex relationship.

I feel like you are going backwards. I mean, I guess if you are slowly seeing your life disintegrate in front of you and the collection of evils an wrongs you have committed gathering into an unstoppable force that is going to collide with you when you least expect it, you might as well get laid as much as possible on the ride to the cliff's edge. Worse things you can do. Still.

Oh, and on the fox. The fox was the part of the story that tells a message to the reader that the main character doesn't understand right away. A little forshadowing. Foxes are omnivorous - alluding to your marital acts of consuming all manner of women during your marriage. They are known for their cunning. Something that any woman is known for as well. As we've all known from the start of your story, your downfall is going to come at the hands of a woman. It could be the wife, the nanny side piece or any one of the current or potentially new concubines in your life that you and the wife share. Male foxes can be known as dogs, something that you clearly define in your hero role in this story. Female foxes can be named vixens, something all the women - the stripper just being the current one - in your life are to you.

A group of foxes can be called an "earth." The earth in your story is the collection of women in your life, now and in the future. The whole planet - the planet of women who will sleep with Ron - are now keeping an eye on you and showing up at wierd times that you can't explain, even when you are just taking time for yourself. You were on a run - a time when most people clear their heads and focus on their own being. Yet in the middle of that - at the time when you should be able to realize the path you are on, a fox appears and scares the hell out of you. Because the whole earth of women to be bedded by Ron are going to be your downfall.

So, for my tl;dr - whatever god you pray to, name when things are going tough, or mystical creature that you think can control the planets just gave you a warning shot across the bow. There is a vixen that is going to entre your life and like a fox does to crops, likely destroy all you have built. It could have been the stripper. It could have been one of the women there with you. It could be someone yet to come. The universe just gave you a warning, and your response to it was to double up your ante on the gamble you are playing. At this point in any story, the hero usually comes to an understanding of the crossroads he faces. The chapters to follow will let us know what turn you took.
Click to expand...
All the makings of a modern day greek tragedy.
Click to expand...
He didn't mention anything about putting it in her butt.
 
So, this was kinda a stand alone vignette. How are the relationships between all of the main characters progressing?

 
(HULK) said:
So, this was kinda a stand alone vignette. How are the relationships between all of the main characters progressing?
Click to expand...
Ron isn't like some half ### "orange is the new black" that blows their wad by releasing the whole season at once, guy. Ron is the Game of Thrones of whoring... you're going to wait 7 days and like it... because the next episode is always worth it.

 
mr fancypants said:
Yankee23Fan said:
Ok, so the basic premise is - you and your wife still have 1-3 concubines in the house, apparantly no more set rules or understandings of any kind, and all went to a strip joint where it is abundantly clear that the wife and the concubines (#1, #2, #3 or #50 it doesn't matter) basically got you laid with yet another potential concubine for the mix and you didn't tell the truth about yet another sex partner in an open sex relationship.

I feel like you are going backwards. I mean, I guess if you are slowly seeing your life disintegrate in front of you and the collection of evils an wrongs you have committed gathering into an unstoppable force that is going to collide with you when you least expect it, you might as well get laid as much as possible on the ride to the cliff's edge. Worse things you can do. Still.

Oh, and on the fox. The fox was the part of the story that tells a message to the reader that the main character doesn't understand right away. A little forshadowing. Foxes are omnivorous - alluding to your marital acts of consuming all manner of women during your marriage. They are known for their cunning. Something that any woman is known for as well. As we've all known from the start of your story, your downfall is going to come at the hands of a woman. It could be the wife, the nanny side piece or any one of the current or potentially new concubines in your life that you and the wife share. Male foxes can be known as dogs, something that you clearly define in your hero role in this story. Female foxes can be named vixens, something all the women - the stripper just being the current one - in your life are to you.

A group of foxes can be called an "earth." The earth in your story is the collection of women in your life, now and in the future. The whole planet - the planet of women who will sleep with Ron - are now keeping an eye on you and showing up at wierd times that you can't explain, even when you are just taking time for yourself. You were on a run - a time when most people clear their heads and focus on their own being. Yet in the middle of that - at the time when you should be able to realize the path you are on, a fox appears and scares the hell out of you. Because the whole earth of women to be bedded by Ron are going to be your downfall.

So, for my tl;dr - whatever god you pray to, name when things are going tough, or mystical creature that you think can control the planets just gave you a warning shot across the bow. There is a vixen that is going to entre your life and like a fox does to crops, likely destroy all you have built. It could have been the stripper. It could have been one of the women there with you. It could be someone yet to come. The universe just gave you a warning, and your response to it was to double up your ante on the gamble you are playing. At this point in any story, the hero usually comes to an understanding of the crossroads he faces. The chapters to follow will let us know what turn you took.
Click to expand...
All the makings of a modern day greek tragedy.
Click to expand...
21st century style - absolutely. The wife just nonchalantly says that its normal for foxes this time of year because they are in heat and its breeding season - a reference to the universe of sex getting even more demanding at this point of time for our hero. The fact that the daughter and Angie were playing Hungry Hippos is even more of a clue for the reader - all that game is about is consuming as much as possible as fast as possible without the slightest regard for anything else.

Also, and I missed it the first time which is why re reading certain important parts of a story arc are so important in a long story - Ron ran into the house and told everyone to stay inside. That was his instinct first - to regroup and hide from the fox that was entering his life. He realized in that moment that he had to protect his family - the most important thing to him on the deepest level. It was the natural instinct of any husband or father. But immediately, Angie keeps playing the game that is all about consumption - with his daughter - another forshadow of the world she is being educated on - and the wife immediately dismisses him - of course you saw a vixen this time of day - they are everywhere looking for sex..... and oh look at that the wife and the concubine later that day want to dive deeper into that world.

The signs are all around our hero. M. Night Shamylan could write this script. Without reading ahead I am assuming that in the future:

1. The fox will return. Likely on another run by our hero. Maybe this time he follows it and it walks down a path where there is a homeless woman that looks like one of Ron's conquests;

2. The fox will start appearing - whether in his mind or actually appearing - at places where the life he lives can't be made known like work and such;

3. Someone' face is going to briefly for a second turn into a demon's face stopping our hero in his tracks;

4. And the signs will get more real, more powerful and more dangerous to our hero.

It's likely that the friend from way way back that knew Angie will make another appearance as what amounts to the voice of reason and allusion to the past when things were maybe not perfect but at least simpler. We still haven't had the life falling apart moment when Ron comes home to an empty house and a note sealed with a bow made of used condoms, but we are getting there.

 
And if you ever come home, look in the kitchen and see a dead fox in a large pot on the stove, run like hell but chances are there's no way out.

 
mr fancypants said:
Yankee23Fan said:
Ok, so the basic premise is - you and your wife still have 1-3 concubines in the house, apparantly no more set rules or understandings of any kind, and all went to a strip joint where it is abundantly clear that the wife and the concubines (#1, #2, #3 or #50 it doesn't matter) basically got you laid with yet another potential concubine for the mix and you didn't tell the truth about yet another sex partner in an open sex relationship.

I feel like you are going backwards. I mean, I guess if you are slowly seeing your life disintegrate in front of you and the collection of evils an wrongs you have committed gathering into an unstoppable force that is going to collide with you when you least expect it, you might as well get laid as much as possible on the ride to the cliff's edge. Worse things you can do. Still.

Oh, and on the fox. The fox was the part of the story that tells a message to the reader that the main character doesn't understand right away. A little forshadowing. Foxes are omnivorous - alluding to your marital acts of consuming all manner of women during your marriage. They are known for their cunning. Something that any woman is known for as well. As we've all known from the start of your story, your downfall is going to come at the hands of a woman. It could be the wife, the nanny side piece or any one of the current or potentially new concubines in your life that you and the wife share. Male foxes can be known as dogs, something that you clearly define in your hero role in this story. Female foxes can be named vixens, something all the women - the stripper just being the current one - in your life are to you.

A group of foxes can be called an "earth." The earth in your story is the collection of women in your life, now and in the future. The whole planet - the planet of women who will sleep with Ron - are now keeping an eye on you and showing up at wierd times that you can't explain, even when you are just taking time for yourself. You were on a run - a time when most people clear their heads and focus on their own being. Yet in the middle of that - at the time when you should be able to realize the path you are on, a fox appears and scares the hell out of you. Because the whole earth of women to be bedded by Ron are going to be your downfall.

So, for my tl;dr - whatever god you pray to, name when things are going tough, or mystical creature that you think can control the planets just gave you a warning shot across the bow. There is a vixen that is going to entre your life and like a fox does to crops, likely destroy all you have built. It could have been the stripper. It could have been one of the women there with you. It could be someone yet to come. The universe just gave you a warning, and your response to it was to double up your ante on the gamble you are playing. At this point in any story, the hero usually comes to an understanding of the crossroads he faces. The chapters to follow will let us know what turn you took.
Click to expand...
All the makings of a modern day greek tragedy.
Click to expand...
Wait, Chaos does butt stuff?

 
McGarnicle said:
mr fancypants said:
Yankee23Fan said:
Ok, so the basic premise is - you and your wife still have 1-3 concubines in the house, apparantly no more set rules or understandings of any kind, and all went to a strip joint where it is abundantly clear that the wife and the concubines (#1, #2, #3 or #50 it doesn't matter) basically got you laid with yet another potential concubine for the mix and you didn't tell the truth about yet another sex partner in an open sex relationship.

I feel like you are going backwards. I mean, I guess if you are slowly seeing your life disintegrate in front of you and the collection of evils an wrongs you have committed gathering into an unstoppable force that is going to collide with you when you least expect it, you might as well get laid as much as possible on the ride to the cliff's edge. Worse things you can do. Still.

Oh, and on the fox. The fox was the part of the story that tells a message to the reader that the main character doesn't understand right away. A little forshadowing. Foxes are omnivorous - alluding to your marital acts of consuming all manner of women during your marriage. They are known for their cunning. Something that any woman is known for as well. As we've all known from the start of your story, your downfall is going to come at the hands of a woman. It could be the wife, the nanny side piece or any one of the current or potentially new concubines in your life that you and the wife share. Male foxes can be known as dogs, something that you clearly define in your hero role in this story. Female foxes can be named vixens, something all the women - the stripper just being the current one - in your life are to you.

A group of foxes can be called an "earth." The earth in your story is the collection of women in your life, now and in the future. The whole planet - the planet of women who will sleep with Ron - are now keeping an eye on you and showing up at wierd times that you can't explain, even when you are just taking time for yourself. You were on a run - a time when most people clear their heads and focus on their own being. Yet in the middle of that - at the time when you should be able to realize the path you are on, a fox appears and scares the hell out of you. Because the whole earth of women to be bedded by Ron are going to be your downfall.

So, for my tl;dr - whatever god you pray to, name when things are going tough, or mystical creature that you think can control the planets just gave you a warning shot across the bow. There is a vixen that is going to entre your life and like a fox does to crops, likely destroy all you have built. It could have been the stripper. It could have been one of the women there with you. It could be someone yet to come. The universe just gave you a warning, and your response to it was to double up your ante on the gamble you are playing. At this point in any story, the hero usually comes to an understanding of the crossroads he faces. The chapters to follow will let us know what turn you took.
Click to expand...
All the makings of a modern day greek tragedy.
Click to expand...
He didn't mention anything about putting it in her butt.
Click to expand...
#### IT

 
I hope this doesn't end with Ron getting his manhood bit off by chaos due to a fox jumping out in front of his SUV. If you see a fox in the road just run over it.

 
[icon] said:
(HULK) said:
So, this was kinda a stand alone vignette. How are the relationships between all of the main characters progressing?
Click to expand...
Ron isn't like some half ### "orange is the new black" that blows their wad by releasing the whole season at once, guy. Ron is the Game of Thrones of whoring... you're going to wait 7 days and like it... because the next episode is always worth it.
Click to expand...
:yes: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: awesome

 
Buckychudd said:
BigJohn said:
We're actually debating whether or not this chick is a hooker? :lmao:
Click to expand...
:no:

We're debating whether people are too thick to understand that AR doesn't want to admit to performing an illegal act on an internet message board.
Click to expand...
Can we not ruin this by trying to peel back the layers of legality here. Just sit right back and enjoy the story. If you can't do that go ##### somewhere else. I mean that in the nicest way possible.

 
If you are debating whether or not AZRon's actions are legal or not, you are in the wrong thread. This thread is dedicated to his debauchery and there are literally dozens of us that just enjoy those stories.

 
next update will feature the wife finding out that Ron did sleep with the stripper, and now she's pissed that he lied about it because of course he lied

 
How confused is the random guy in the strip club when there's a break in the techno and rap to hear "What Does The Fox Say" blare over the speakers?

I'm going to bet 4 mins with Chaos that the DJ had to download that gem before playing it. No way he had it in his bag of tricks.

 
Bogart said:
How confused is the random guy in the strip club when there's a break in the techno and rap to hear "What Does The Fox Say" blare over the speakers?

I'm going to bet 4 mins with Chaos that the DJ had to download that gem before playing it. No way he had it in his bag of tricks.
Click to expand...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jofNR_WkoCE

Dog goes "woof"

Cat goes "meow"

Bird goes "tweet"

And mouse goes "squeek"

Cow goes "moo"

Frog goes "croak"

And the elephant goes "toot"

Ducks say "quack"

And fish go "blub"

And the seal goes "ow ow ow"

But there's one sound

That no one knows

What does the fox say?

"Ring-ding-ding-ding-dingeringeding!

Gering-ding-ding-ding-dingeringeding!

Gering-ding-ding-ding-dingeringeding!"

What the fox say?

"Wa-pa-pa-pa-pa-pa-pow!

Wa-pa-pa-pa-pa-pa-pow!

Wa-pa-pa-pa-pa-pa-pow!"

What the fox say?

"Hatee-hatee-hatee-ho!

Hatee-hatee-hatee-ho!

Hatee-hatee-hatee-ho!"

What the fox say?

"Joff-tchoff-tchoffo-tchoffo-tchoff!

Tchoff-tchoff-tchoffo-tchoffo-tchoff!

Joff-tchoff-tchoffo-tchoffo-tchoff!"

What the fox say?

Big blue eyes

Pointy nose

Chasing mice

And digging holes

Tiny paws

Up the hill

Suddenly you're standing still

Your fur is red

So beautiful

Like an angel in disguise

But if you meet

A friendly horse

Will you communicate by

Mo-o-o-o-orse?

Mo-o-o-o-orse?

Mo-o-o-o-orse?

How will you speak to that

Ho-o-o-o-orse?

Ho-o-o-o-orse?

Ho-o-o-o-orse?

What does the fox say?

"Jacha-chacha-chacha-chow!

Chacha-chacha-chacha-chow!

Chacha-chacha-chacha-chow!"

What the fox say?

"Fraka-kaka-kaka-kaka-kow!

Fraka-kaka-kaka-kaka-kow!

Fraka-kaka-kaka-kaka-kow!"

What the fox say?

"A-hee-ahee ha-hee!

A-hee-ahee ha-hee!

A-hee-ahee ha-hee!"

What the fox say?

"A-oo-oo-oo-ooo!

Woo-oo-oo-ooo!"

What does the fox say?

The secret of the fox

Ancient mystery

Somewhere deep in the woods

I know you're hiding

What is your sound?

Will we ever know?

Will always be a mystery

What do you say?

You're my guardian angel

Hiding in the woods

What is your sound?

(Wa-wa-way-do, wub-wid-bid-dum-way-do, wa-wa-way-do)

Will we ever know? (Bay-budabud-dum-bam)

I want to (Mama-dum-day-do) I want to, I want to know!

(Abay-ba-da bum-bum bay-do)

 
Last edited by a moderator:
[SIZE=medium][Friday][/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]It’s a week later, Friday. It’s about 10:00am, the girls are at work/school and the house is all nice and quiet. I finished a breakfast protein shake then sat on the couch with my laptop and iPhone 6+ swapping between checking email and making CC donations. I’m still wearing the gym shorts and a t-shirt I woke up in; I’m drinking an unflavored black coffee to slowly convince myself to get a few miles in for the day but still haven’t put on shoes, socks or my Under Armor gear as of yet. Al Jazzera in on TV in the background. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]I hear the front door security “peep peep” and walking in is the Ice Princess with “Chuckie” (her dog). Chuckie immediately runs up and jumps on me to greet me with a tongue lashing almost making me spill my coffee; he then runs around, upstairs – I hear him running through the halls and then downstairs seemly looking for everyone else. He finally settles down in the family room while making random checks at the sliding glass door leading to the backyard. I let him out back.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]Ice Princess doesn’t even say hi (I’ve come to realize not using a greeting is her shtick). She’s wearing sweatpants, a tight t-shirt and flip flops. She goes into my kitchen, makes a bowl of cereal, kicks off her flip flops and sits on the floor while leaning up to my couch in my living (her favorite spot). [/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]After munching for a while, she says while looking straight ahead at the TV, [/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]Ice: “where is everyone?”[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]Me: “Wife is at work, Angie at class and daughter is in school”. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]Ice: “And what are you doing? ‘working from home’, aka jerking off and doing nothing”.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]Me: :rolleyes: [/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium](a long pause)[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]Ice: “I saw you staring at my ##### at the club last week, you miss it don’t you”.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]Me: (sarcastically), “Yes I do, it’s the most fantastic ##### I’ve ever seen in my life. I feel empty without it” (I chuckle a bit and go back to my email).[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium](another long pause, silence) [/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]Me: (sincere), “Seriously, we had a good time and you looked great. I liked your outfit”.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]She gets up and takes the bowl of cereal to the kitchen. Then comes back and asks me, “Which outfit did you like? The green one?”…then, She takes her sweatpants off (no panties), t-shirt off and says, “or this one?”[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium](aside: I’ve done just about everything a man can with this chick yet I still look at her in amazement; I feel like a 12 year old looking at his first porno mag, when she’s naked)[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]Me: (fumbling for words)…”yes”[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]She walks up to me while I’m sitting on the couch, pushes the laptop off of my lap with her foot and takes my phone tossing it to the edge of the couch. She then stands on the couch, one leg on each side of me so her vag is within an inch away from my face and says, “See, you’re staring at it again you creep”. I lean forward right into it while clutching her ### tightly; I have eating a lot of ##### in my day and this one…this one…is just….fantastic…[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]After a few moments, her dominate stands is starting to wane; I feel her leg muscles convulsing slightly then she quickly pushes my head away. She steps down and lays at the edge of the couch with one leg on the floor and the other up on the couch, both legs at a 45 degreeish angle and spread wide. I’m still wearing my sweat shorts and t-shirt so I confidently take off my shorts and lean into her :pickle: first.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]She grabs the neckline of my t-shirt and the back of my head sending me back down to finish my plate. I am going to town, downtown – two fingers working and tongue slurping. She leans back more and more, then she grips her legs around my head, she shakes fast…the real slow…the says, “wait, wait” gently pushing me away. “Don’t’ touch me” (she says quietly as she organisms). She lays silently for a minute or two then pops up, goes to the bathroom. I’m still rock hard, not sure if I should just sit here with my #### out or put my shorts back on.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]She comes out, picks up her clothes and puts them on. I put on my shorts, still pitching a tent. She says, “oh I forgot something” and runs out the front door – I’m like :confused: . She comes back in with a bag of dog food, and says, “I switched Chuckie to this dog food now (drops the bag of dog food), k gotta run – oh and have fun jerking off (sinister laughter)”.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]I sit stunned for a sec, then open my phone simply out of habit; it opens directly to CoC, oh that Pekka I cooked for Zub is ready – all yours bud. I then go take a shower.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium][saturday][/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]It’s about 5:00am Saturday morning, I wake up to my phone ringing, it’s the Wife. I pick up the phone and hear a group of women yelling, “WE WANT PANCAKES!!!, WE WANT PANCAKES!!!, WE WANT PANCAKES!!!”. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]Me: “STOP!!!, wtf is going on?”[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]Wife: “We were going to go to iHop but your pancakes are way better, are you up yet?”[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]Me: “I am now” (I usually wake up between 5:30 and 6:30 so it was fine). “How long until you get here?”[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium](I hear my wife in the background yelling above the other two girls asking the Uber driver how long until they get home, 15 mins).[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]Wife: “15 MINUTES!!!”[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]Me: “Okay, okay, got it”.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]I pull myself out of bed, I go check on my daughter’s room; I open her door and see the tent is up (on Friday nights, Angie and my daughter “camp out” in her room – they’re fast asleep in the tent).[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]I throw on shorts and a t-shirt and head downstairs – first order of business is coffee; I prep the Keurig and start brewing a coffee. I search around the fridge for fruit, I usually keep a fruit tray in the house and today is no different (I really just like the watermelon but I’m so self-conscious that I buy a fruit tray every time, the girls eat all the other fruit).[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]The girls burst in the front door, talking loudly and at the same time telling each other to “SHHHH” – drunk, obviously. It’s Ice Princess, Girl 1 and my Wife. They settle down then Ice Princess proclaims, “I’m making the pancakes”. Wife and Girl 1 at first say just let Ron make the pancakes but then they back down to Alpha Female – I say, “whatever, have at it” and took a seat on the couch. I tell them to go down to the basement so they don’t wake Daughter and Angie up, they do but Ice still says, “stay out of the kitchen, I’m making pancakes” – whatever.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]I go to the kitchen to get my coffee and to take out the pancake mix (it’s the just add water type) from the cabinet sitting right next to a box of instant mash potatoes. I spontaneously decide switch the bag of mash potatoes with the bag of pancake mix, went back to the couch to wait for this debacle while sipping coffee. Sure enough, 15 mins later, Ice is mixing instant mash potato mix and water while yelling out loud that this doesn’t look right; my Wife and Girl 1 convince her to let me make the pancakes. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]I walk into the kitchen while they’re all still there and say, “This smells like mash potatoes” – my Wife and Girl 1 burst into laughter – Ice Princess flips out yelling, “YOU ARE A F##### A##HOLE”. They all go back downstairs. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]I quarter some strawberries and bananas, mix them in a bowl with a little confectioners sugar and add them to the pancake mix. For Ice, she’s a chocolate freak so I cut up some Hersey’s kisses and made her chocolate pancakes; I take the pancakes downstairs – Ice is falling asleep but says, “I don’t want any of your ####### pancakes”. I set my Wife and Girl 1’s down; they remark the strawberries and bananas then Ice notices I made her chocolate pancakes. Ice pauses, perks up - I saw her look of disgust go to a look of excitement saying, “You made chocolate pancakes!!! Just for me?” She hops up, kisses me and says thank you.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]By 7:30, they finished eating and were all sleeping downstairs. Angie and my daughter were still sleeping upstairs. I went back to my couch and opened my phone.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]Zub needs a Pekka, I gotcha bud. [/SIZE]

 
Last edited by a moderator:
Damn dude why do you let that slut boss you around. Its really pathetic. I bet she just had a load in her before you ate the plate to completion.

 
St. Peter: Hello, TheAristocrat!

TheAristocrat: Hey, I guess I died. Any chance I can get in?

St. Peter: Did you lead a good life?

TA: I think so. Started off a bit of a doofus but I like to think that I leveled out and generally became a good person.

SP: Do you remember this moment?

TA: I'd rather not talk about it.

SP: What are you doing here?

TA: Well, ummm, I'm grabbing my crank to a story about some dude making breakfast for a couple lesbians.

SP: ....

TA: I swear, the story was off to a great start and then out of nowhere I was as shuked as you.

SP: ....

TA: REALLY! The updates normally had a flow to an epic sexual conquest that I had never attempted, let alone succeeded in.

SP: ....

TA: Just toss me down. I can't apologize enough for my magnificent tool in my hands to a story about making breakfast. Are we going to the JC Penney ads from 1992 as well?

 
“I switched Chuckie to this dog food now (drops the bag of dog food), k gotta run – oh and have fun jerking off (sinister laughter)”.

I don't know how you didn't go into a fit of rage.

 
Ned said:
“I switched Chuckie to this dog food now (drops the bag of dog food), k gotta run – oh and have fun jerking off (sinister laughter)”.

I don't know how you didn't go into a fit of rage.
Click to expand...
No, I never let her rattle my cage. It comes with the territory dealing with crazy women.

 
[SIZE=medium] I search around the fridge for fruit, I usually keep a fruit tray in the house and today is no different (I really just like the watermelon but I’m so self-conscious that I buy a fruit tray every time, the girls eat all the other fruit).[/SIZE]

:lmao: GTFO dude.

 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

scorchy
Any banking guys that can offer solutions to a vexing issue?
Replies
31
Views
719
Mrs. Rannous
Mrs. Rannous
Ministry of Pain
For those starting a Supplemental Nutritional Assistance Program with family or friends
Replies
5
Views
291
Gatorade
Gatorade
DJackson10
Just Started a new job at a Cigar company. Help me learn more about I’m selling please
Replies
17
Views
398
Mrs. Rannous
Mrs. Rannous

Users who are viewing this thread

Total: 1 (members: 0, guests: 1)
Back
Top