Marital Advice - Friendly camping trip too friendly? (1 Viewer)

[Alias]

MITYH, I have to say I think you and everyone here are completely overreacting about the whole situation. To me reading this it is much more plausible that George and Steve were just screwing with you about your wife being in the same stall with Steve. The original post indicates there was a lot of joking of this nature going on the whole trip. I don't know the characters in the story but to me it seems it's more likely that they were just ####### with you than your wife and your friend cheated on you (even though they were intoxicated). You have no first hand evidence that they were in the same stall, nobody remembers any significant goings on, and it wouldn't be all that strange for a man to wait for a woman to escort her safely back from the bathroom on a late night camping trip. Obviously I think you should talk to your wife, Steve, and George about what happened if you are concerned about it, but I think you should be more trusting your wife and your friend. Innocent until testing positive.

fixed

 

[Mr. Know-It-All]

Another option is to have sex with George to make up for your wife cheating on you. That would complete the circle.

 

[AnonymousBob]

MITYH, I have to say I think you and everyone here are completely overreacting about the whole situation. To me reading this it is much more plausible that George and Steve were just screwing with you about your wife being in the same stall with Steve. The original post indicates there was a lot of joking of this nature going on the whole trip. I don't know the characters in the story but to me it seems it's more likely that they were just ####### with you than your wife and your friend cheated on you (even though they were intoxicated). You have no first hand evidence that they were in the same stall, nobody remembers any significant goings on, and it wouldn't be all that strange for a man to wait for a woman to escort her safely back from the bathroom on a late night camping trip. Obviously I think you should talk to your wife, Steve, and George about what happened if you are concerned about it, but I think you should be more trusting your wife and your friend. Innocent until proven guilty.

The wife is part of the joke and she yanked her #### out of her bra just to mess with her husband? That's beyond the grounds of joking.

 

[TheNewGirl]

Yellow Hat... you tell us.... What do YOU think happened? Honestly.

Dude, I have no idea. The problem is, I could think of hundreds of scenarios, but no one seems to be able to tell me a damn thing. Having known these people so long, I find it hard to believe they'd do this, especially with me and Steve's wife only a few hundred feet away. Then again, alcohol can do things to be people that can't be explained.George is the bachelor of the group, and will probably remain that way for a while. Now again, we're always joking around about stuff, so I couldn't tell at the time if he was serious or not. That's what makes this damn frustrating.

Is George that much a jokester that he would mention the fact the two of them went into the stall not once, but twice? How did Steve's wife react when they finally came back?

And why were her boobs out? How OLD are all of these people, anyways? Sounds like a ####ing frat camping trip.

 

[Wyldfox]

I just read what happened and skipped all the rest, so not sure if I'm missing out on anything that may have been added.

I say just let it go. You saw the flirting, George was trying to tell you something, and you just laughed it off. Y'all were drunk, which is no excuse, but it's over and done with. Next time listen to George when he points out that they're not back yet. He seemed more concerned about it than you did.

No - only 326 other posts. At least 35 other people have posted exactly what you did and at least 75 posted why they disagree.

But thanks for your unique perspective.

Added by MITYH. Things he may have found out since. How's that? Do you understand what I mean now?

Only thing added by OP was that he emailed George and George said he doesn't remember anything. The other ~7 pages are comments from the FFA.

Thanks, Alias.

 

[glock]

My camping trip this past weekend was nowhere near as entertaining as this one...

 

[14U2NV]

It sounds like you wanted this to happen. Either out of guilt or fantasy. No man in his right mind lets his wife; ironically needing to go to the bathroom the same time as Steve, for 15 minutes and do absolutely nothing about it. Then George tells you to handle your business up there not once but twice and you laugh it off. Do you feel inferior to Steve? Have you had relations with Steve's wife? What has Steve's wife said about this issue on the exact day? This story doesn't add up without another explanation of how much of a crush did you wife once have for Steve and how often has she gave hints. How often did she flirt with him prior to this incident? I think you were trying to test her while enjoying your fantasy, and it all went south for you. Now you have no clue what to do. Do not risk things you are not willing to lose. You cannot fight Steve. Get rid of the wife because once she has a taste of excitement that she ain't getting from you she will continue to go astray.

Listen I am not mad at you, I don't even know you. I am just mad at the situation and put myself in your shoes. It sucks and I wish you nothing but the best results from this. Please step up and hold on to the only thing you can; your dignity. Good luck.

 

[flufhed]

Yellow Hat... you tell us.... What do YOU think happened? Honestly.

Dude, I have no idea. The problem is, I could think of hundreds of scenarios, but no one seems to be able to tell me a damn thing. Having known these people so long, I find it hard to believe they'd do this, especially with me and Steve's wife only a few hundred feet away. Then again, alcohol can do things to be people that can't be explained.George is the bachelor of the group, and will probably remain that way for a while. Now again, we're always joking around about stuff, so I couldn't tell at the time if he was serious or not. That's what makes this damn frustrating.

You're still wondering, pondering, waffling and rationalizing. Basically reaffirming everything said by proninja. I honestly think at this point you probably should just forget about it and move on. You don't seem to be up to the challenge here.

 

[RudiStein]

The only way to fix this is to have sex with Steve's wife.

While you're at it go ahead and have sex with George too.

 

[BelikinMan]

The way Steve and his wife were so open about it, it wouldn't surprise me if this was their first "camping trip" hookup.

MITYH's cowardly response assures that it won't be her last.

 

[flufhed]

MITYH, I have to say I think you and everyone here are completely overreacting about the whole situation. To me reading this it is much more plausible that George and Steve were just screwing with you about your wife being in the same stall with Steve. The original post indicates there was a lot of joking of this nature going on the whole trip. I don't know the characters in the story but to me it seems it's more likely that they were just ####### with you than your wife and your friend cheated on you (even though they were intoxicated). You have no first hand evidence that they were in the same stall, nobody remembers any significant goings on, and it wouldn't be all that strange for a man to wait for a woman to escort her safely back from the bathroom on a late night camping trip. Obviously I think you should talk to your wife, Steve, and George about what happened if you are concerned about it, but I think you should be more trusting your wife and your friend. Innocent until proven guilty.

Bingo. There's your mental and emotional out, or "blue pill,: if you like, if you want to take it. Or you can take the red pill and see just how deep the rabbit hole goes.

 

[H Jass]

I think we need David Dodds to weigh in on this. This situation calls for his brand of revenge.

This is a splinter that isn't going to just go away. You gotta have closure one way or another.

 

[Commish77]

Yellow Hat... you tell us.... What do YOU think happened? Honestly.

Dude, I have no idea. The problem is, I could think of hundreds of scenarios, but no one seems to be able to tell me a damn thing. Having known these people so long, I find it hard to believe they'd do this, especially with me and Steve's wife only a few hundred feet away. Then again, alcohol can do things to be people that can't be explained.George is the bachelor of the group, and will probably remain that way for a while. Now again, we're always joking around about stuff, so I couldn't tell at the time if he was serious or not. That's what makes this damn frustrating.

OK, I know you don't KNOW what happened.... You say you can think of 100's of things. Well, of those 100's of scenarios, how many of them are something you are comfortable with your wife doing with another guy in a bathroom stall?I'm guessing maybe 1 or 2 out of those hundred, agree?Something happened here pal. Something that shouldn't have happened. You need to get to the bottom of this NOW.

 

[pricklypete]

Hat,

Anything more from George?

Or did you just leave it with what he said?

 

[SuperJohn96]

MITYH, I have to say I think you and everyone here are completely overreacting about the whole situation. To me reading this it is much more plausible that George and Steve were just screwing with you about your wife being in the same stall with Steve. The original post indicates there was a lot of joking of this nature going on the whole trip. I don't know the characters in the story but to me it seems it's more likely that they were just ####### with you than your wife and your friend cheated on you (even though they were intoxicated). You have no first hand evidence that they were in the same stall, nobody remembers any significant goings on, and it wouldn't be all that strange for a man to wait for a woman to escort her safely back from the bathroom on a late night camping trip. Obviously I think you should talk to your wife, Steve, and George about what happened if you are concerned about it, but I think you should be more trusting your wife and your friend. Innocent until proven guilty.

I be the wife had evidence on her hand.

 

[PsychoMan]

Hat,Anything more from George?Or did you just leave it with what he said?

And how exactly did he say it? Was he at all concerned that you think your wife and Steve may have cheated together!?!?!

 

[BelikinMan]

OK, I know you don't KNOW what happened.... You say you can think of 100's of things.

67. Do a crossword puzzle

 

[ElvisMonster]

OK, I know you don't KNOW what happened.... You say you can think of 100's of things.

1. Cut a hole in the box.

 

[Capn Crunch]

Ask Steve if he thinks your wife looks like a toilet paper dispenser. When he looks at you like you have three heads, say "Well, she went into the stall with you for 15 minutes for some reason..." and see what happens.

Add me into the "gotta get things straight here" crowd. You don't and it'll probably happen again. My sister's marriage was wrecked by a "Steve" - except that Steve was taking care of my sister's husband.

 

[the rover]

I just read what happened and skipped all the rest, so not sure if I'm missing out on anything that may have been added.I say just let it go. You saw the flirting, George was trying to tell you something, and you just laughed it off. Y'all were drunk, which is no excuse, but it's over and done with. Next time listen to George when he points out that they're not back yet. He seemed more concerned about it than you did.

You cheated on your ex-husband, right?

 

[ElvisMonster]

My sister's marriage was wrecked by a "Steve" - except that Steve was taking care of my sister's husband.

 

[Man in the yellow hat]

George is the bachelor of the group, and will probably remain that way for a while. Now again, we're always joking around about stuff, so I couldn't tell at the time if he was serious or not. That's what makes this damn frustrating.

So you think it was a possibility that he was joking around about them being in the same stall, and that he doesn't remember making the joke?And what was Steve laughing about when they came back? Do you remember the converstation?

I remember it being very short. George said "Where the hell were you two? Jeez." Steve laughed, I looked up, that was it. And it is quite possible George doesn't remembers even saying this, but I have a difficult time believing this. And let's put this in perspective a bit. Of the guys she walked to the bathroom with, two of the three were former roomates of hers. Steve was the exception. So, there was no reason for me to be concerned at all. There's a women's bathroom on one side, and men's on the other. Why would I be concerned about a group of people walking there together.As for me not going up there, I really didn't think George was serious. And since he can't remember, I question just how serious he was.

 

[The Shizzle]

Did you explain to your kids that Mommy cheated on Daddy?

 

[Sabertooth]

...This post here provides the full-proof method of getting at the truth I think. Of course, there will be all sorts of consequential damages with this approach.

I strongly agree with this.

 

[Commish77]

George is the bachelor of the group, and will probably remain that way for a while. Now again, we're always joking around about stuff, so I couldn't tell at the time if he was serious or not. That's what makes this damn frustrating.

So you think it was a possibility that he was joking around about them being in the same stall, and that he doesn't remember making the joke?And what was Steve laughing about when they came back? Do you remember the converstation?

I remember it being very short. George said "Where the hell were you two? Jeez." Steve laughed, I looked up, that was it. And it is quite possible George doesn't remembers even saying this, but I have a difficult time believing this. And let's put this in perspective a bit. Of the guys she walked to the bathroom with, two of the three were former roomates of hers. Steve was the exception. So, there was no reason for me to be concerned at all. There's a women's bathroom on one side, and men's on the other. Why would I be concerned about a group of people walking there together.As for me not going up there, I really didn't think George was serious. And since he can't remember, I question just how serious he was.

Until you can ditch what you WANT to believe happened, we can't help you man. Seriously.

 

[Man in the yellow hat]

Hat,Anything more from George?Or did you just leave it with what he said?

And how exactly did he say it? Was he at all concerned that you think your wife and Steve may have cheated together!?!?!

Left it with what he had to say. He said he thought he had a firm grasp on how the night went, but he has no recollection of that happening. He didn't seem overly concerned with me asking about it. In fact, he seemed surprised.

 

[Kilgore Trout]

Until you can ditch what you WANT to believe happened, we can't help you man. Seriously.

A lot of people in this thread are just as guilty of wanting to believe something. Fact is that we have no idea what happened.

 

[Stevie]

Maybe I missed it, but has it been stated just how outraged the wife is over being groped in her drunken condition?Cuz if she's not...

Seriously. OMG!!! My boobs are just FLOPPING out!!! How in the hell did THAT happen?! I will tell you how it happened, she was ####ing around with Steve. Trying to think of a good way to manipulate her into telling what happens, because she damn well remembers, as does everyone else that was there.

Like yours never try to escape....

She would have tripped over those bigguns

 

[Commish77]

Until you can ditch what you WANT to believe happened, we can't help you man. Seriously.

A lot of people in this thread are just as guilty of wanting to believe something. Fact is that we have no idea what happened.

Exactly my point. He has to get to the bottom of the story. Wishing and hoping that everything is on the up and up is getting him nowhere.

 

[Cavalier]

She got hosed Tommy, she got hosed.

 

[ooofffaaa]

With the way you and your friends joke around this "event" will never go away.

From here on out it will always come up and be a sore spot for you.

 

[andyjayhawker]

MITYH, I have to say I think you and everyone here are completely overreacting about the whole situation. To me reading this it is much more plausible that George and Steve were just screwing with you about your wife being in the same stall with Steve. The original post indicates there was a lot of joking of this nature going on the whole trip. I don't know the characters in the story but to me it seems it's more likely that they were just ####### with you than your wife and your friend cheated on you (even though they were intoxicated). You have no first hand evidence that they were in the same stall, nobody remembers any significant goings on, and it wouldn't be all that strange for a man to wait for a woman to escort her safely back from the bathroom on a late night camping trip. Obviously I think you should talk to your wife, Steve, and George about what happened if you are concerned about it, but I think you should be more trusting your wife and your friend. Innocent until proven guilty.

And his wife's hoots?? Were they just part of this hillarious, madcap gag?

No, but if she puked in the bathroom they easily could have popped out as she struggled over the toilet, there are lots of similar scenarios that could result in this.

 

[Kilgore Trout]

Until you can ditch what you WANT to believe happened, we can't help you man. Seriously.

A lot of people in this thread are just as guilty of wanting to believe something. Fact is that we have no idea what happened.

Exactly my point. He has to get to the bottom of the story. Wishing and hoping that everything is on the up and up is getting him nowhere.

I'm just saying that 95 percent of the people in this thread are convinced that his wife did something, and it is based on very little evidence. He is trying to get to the bottom of the story, but if nothing happened than how far must he dig?

 

[mr. furley]

I just read what happened and skipped all the rest, so not sure if I'm missing out on anything that may have been added.I say just let it go. You saw the flirting, George was trying to tell you something, and you just laughed it off. Y'all were drunk, which is no excuse, but it's over and done with. Next time listen to George when he points out that they're not back yet. He seemed more concerned about it than you did.

You cheated on your ex-husband, right?

oh ####

 

[the rover]

George is the bachelor of the group, and will probably remain that way for a while. Now again, we're always joking around about stuff, so I couldn't tell at the time if he was serious or not. That's what makes this damn frustrating.

So you think it was a possibility that he was joking around about them being in the same stall, and that he doesn't remember making the joke?And what was Steve laughing about when they came back? Do you remember the converstation?

I remember it being very short. George said "Where the hell were you two? Jeez." Steve laughed, I looked up, that was it. And it is quite possible George doesn't remembers even saying this, but I have a difficult time believing this. And let's put this in perspective a bit. Of the guys she walked to the bathroom with, two of the three were former roomates of hers. Steve was the exception. So, there was no reason for me to be concerned at all. There's a women's bathroom on one side, and men's on the other. Why would I be concerned about a group of people walking there together.

As for me not going up there, I really didn't think George was serious. And since he can't remember, I question just how serious he was.

don't you have to ignore the part about her freshly unfettered boobs to do this?

 

[the rover]

I just read what happened and skipped all the rest, so not sure if I'm missing out on anything that may have been added.I say just let it go. You saw the flirting, George was trying to tell you something, and you just laughed it off. Y'all were drunk, which is no excuse, but it's over and done with. Next time listen to George when he points out that they're not back yet. He seemed more concerned about it than you did.

You cheated on your ex-husband, right?

oh ####

just sayin'. her relationship posts should come with a disclaimer.

 

[Cavalier]

If you want to know what really happened this is what you do:

Make up an email address that would sort of sound like Steve........on his provider or hotmail etc. Write an email to your wife as Steve. Say that your wife is asking what happened in the bathroom that nite and you only remember bits and pieces and ask her what she remembers.........

They you will know what your wife knows.

 

[SeveredHorseHeads]

If your wife continues to deny it, then fine, you act like you believe her and start talking about how you're going to talk to the police because you think she was raped. She either breaks down and tells you, legitimately doesn't remember, or is so scared to tell you that she will let it ride out.

This is insane.

Why? If his wife was fondled and honestly was too drunk to remember it, then it is sexual assault. Of course, we know that isn't true, and this will likely allow the truth to come out.

I just don't see why you need to resort to such outlandish tactics as acusing someone of rape when you have no hard evidence that this is the case. Fine, he should have another conversation with his wife. Maybe go nuts on Steve. But rape?

No one is suggesting that Steve is actually guilty of or should actually be charged with rape.

That's an awfully big bluff that you're going to have to show when it gets called.

I don't think there's anythin to lose. Unless you still think there's a chance nothing happened.The friendship with Steve is over. The friendship with George is in serious question. The only remaining issue is what to do with the marriage - and to answer that question you have to get someone to be honest with you.

Also, if she was so drunk she can't remember what happened that same night (the bra portion of the story) then it's possible that she didn't give consent. I'm not entirely sure, but I thought that people can claim that they were too inebriated to make a decision in rape cases. I'd say there is a chance she was sexually assaulted. I wouldn't be hesitant to bring that thought up to Steve. You don't have to say, "I THINK YOU RAPED HER, STEVE!" Just let him know that you don't think it was possible for her to give consent. She was too drunk. He'll get the picture real quick.

 

[andyjayhawker]

Hat,Anything more from George?Or did you just leave it with what he said?

And how exactly did he say it? Was he at all concerned that you think your wife and Steve may have cheated together!?!?!

Left it with what he had to say. He said he thought he had a firm grasp on how the night went, but he has no recollection of that happening. He didn't seem overly concerned with me asking about it. In fact, he seemed surprised.

Further evidence that this is simply a case of Steve/George having a little fun at MITYH's expense. At this point I really think nothing happened. Steve gentlemanly walked Mrs. MITYH back to the campsite from the bathroom, and that's that. An offhand comment about "what took you two so long" would be a common joke and certainly nothing to get worried about.

 

[Fla\/\/ed]

Until you can ditch what you WANT to believe happened, we can't help you man. Seriously.

A lot of people in this thread are just as guilty of wanting to believe something. Fact is that we have no idea what happened.

Exactly my point. He has to get to the bottom of the story. Wishing and hoping that everything is on the up and up is getting him nowhere.

I'm just saying that 95 percent of the people in this thread are convinced that his wife did something, and it is based on very little evidence. He is trying to get to the bottom of the story, but if nothing happened than how far must he dig?

I think her hooters hanging out of her bra is decent evidence that something went down.

 

[ElvisMonster]

I'm just saying that 95 percent of the people in this thread are convinced that his wife did something...

Just guessing that we're not the only ones. This thread didn't start out with "Hey guys! Check out this funny story that happened when I was camping! ". Dude was concerned about his wife spending FIFTEEN minutes in a bathroom stall with ANOTHER DUDE. I think that might be enough to almost convince me that something pretty UnWAR took place.

 

[Kilgore Trout]

I'm just saying that 95 percent of the people in this thread are convinced that his wife did something...

Just guessing that we're not the only ones. This thread didn't start out with "Hey guys! Check out this funny story that happened when I was camping! ". Dude was concerned about his wife spending FIFTEEN minutes in a bathroom stall with ANOTHER DUDE. I think that might be enough to almost convince me that something pretty UnWAR took place.

I guess 15 minutes is the gold standard for sexaul experiences. And the only evidence we have that they were in the stall together was George.

 

[Johnny Ryall]

As for me not going up there, I really didn't think George was serious. And since he can't remember, I question just how serious he was.

George looked and me and said "Dude, seriously. Where are those two? They went into the same stall together."

So does George always say "dude, seriously" when he's joking around?

 

[flufhed]

I'm just saying that 95 percent of the people in this thread are convinced that his wife did something...

Just guessing that we're not the only ones. This thread didn't start out with "Hey guys! Check out this funny story that happened when I was camping! ". Dude was concerned about his wife spending FIFTEEN minutes in a bathroom stall with ANOTHER DUDE. I think that might be enough to almost convince me that something pretty UnWAR took place.

Seriously.The guy says he is sick about it and can't sleep. And he is the one that has been around the sexual joking for years. If he is used to this stuff, and after this event is so upset that he can't sleep, I hardly think we are jumping to conclusions here.

 

[Stevie]

If you want to know what really happened this is what you do:Make up an email address that would sort of sound like Steve........on his provider or hotmail etc. Write an email to your wife as Steve. Say that your wife is asking what happened in the bathroom that nite and you only remember bits and pieces and ask her what she remembers.........They you will know what your wife knows.

 

[flufhed]

I don't like the e-mail thing. I think that will blow up in your face. The likely scenario is wife gets e-mail, and calls Steve up, or asks to meet with him in person.

 

[Bonzai]

George is the bachelor of the group, and will probably remain that way for a while. Now again, we're always joking around about stuff, so I couldn't tell at the time if he was serious or not. That's what makes this damn frustrating.

So you think it was a possibility that he was joking around about them being in the same stall, and that he doesn't remember making the joke?And what was Steve laughing about when they came back? Do you remember the converstation?

I remember it being very short. George said "Where the hell were you two? Jeez." Steve laughed, I looked up, that was it. And it is quite possible George doesn't remembers even saying this, but I have a difficult time believing this. And let's put this in perspective a bit. Of the guys she walked to the bathroom with, two of the three were former roomates of hers. Steve was the exception. So, there was no reason for me to be concerned at all. There's a women's bathroom on one side, and men's on the other. Why would I be concerned about a group of people walking there together.As for me not going up there, I really didn't think George was serious. And since he can't remember, I question just how serious he was.

i think that if that was all there was to it, then yeah, you'd be on point.but what about them coming back 10, 15 minutes later than everyone else, and then later finding her fun bags out of her bra?

 

[Cavalier]

If you want to know what really happened this is what you do:Make up an email address that would sort of sound like Steve........on his provider or hotmail etc. Write an email to your wife as Steve. Say that your wife is asking what happened in the bathroom that nite and you only remember bits and pieces and ask her what she remembers.........They you will know what your wife knows.

You might end up divorced but at least you know the truth.You could have always checked the muff that night.........would have made it easy.

 

[Koya]

Why not be upfront about it, be a man, and ASK your wife. Tell her that people have been saying a lot of things, and that while you don't believe anything to have happened, to be honest, considering how drunk everyone was, you really don't know. Give her a chance to come out in the open. Otherwise, this will naw at you forever.

If you and your wife have a strong relationship, this is the only way to go. Just talk about it, get it out in the open and move on.

 

[Cavalier]

I don't like the e-mail thing. I think that will blow up in your face. The likely scenario is wife gets e-mail, and calls Steve up, or asks to meet with him in person.

Well of course............you tell her that the wife is suspicious and to only use this email because the wife doesn't know about it........and if she calls the wife will see the cell phone record...........etc.