@Zow and other fancy country club members
Let's say you have a colleague who's a senior executive and doesn't really work for you but tangentially does. You find out you both like golf and invite him to play at your club.
What is the etiquette for things to pay for and/or bring?
If he's a member somewhere else, the expectation is that he would obviously invite you in return.
If that's not the case, I feel like the standard is the host pays the guest fees and the guest maybe pays for lunch or drinks afterwards. But honestly, most of the time I bring a guest and they ask "what do I owe?" it always just ends up with them forcing 100 bucks into my hand to cover it.
The one time i got invited to Baltusrol by my dad's former partner, my brother and I were just asked to pay our caddy fee. But to be fair, that guy has been a member there for 50 years and they don't actually make him pay for his golf anymore (plus he has 9 figures in the bank)
Sorry. I'm not a member anywhere and I'm being invited. Was just trying to share there's a slight power dynamic work wise.
So yeah, I would say the expectation is that you ask "what do I owe" at the end. If he doesn't let you pay for the round, offer to pay for lunch.
And if you have a caddie, I'd try to pay for that as well.
It's a delicate balance though. Gotta ride that line of not looking like a free loader while also not outright rejecting his generosity (or possibly embarrass him at the club by inadvertently making him look cheap in front of other members or staff)
This is why I'm glad my friends aren't fancy.
This can be tough Usually the caddie fee is all you owe. You can offer to cover the hosts caddie and lunch, but usually they turn it down. And you should spend a bit of $s in the golf shop out of courtesy to the club. Shirt, hat, whatever. The goal would be to reciprocate them at your club if you can. If not, send them a bottle of something to potentially get a second invite.
My friends and I have a deal. First time we invite you, we cover everything. From then on you have to pay the host back the accompanied guest fee, and cover your own caddie fee. We do this to encourage each other to host, and the guest might even bring a friend or two. Otherwise the host is looking at $300/person * 3 guests + lunch = about $1K each time you host at a top club. Maybe $450 total at a mid tier club. Heck, at a couple of clubs the total is gonna come to like $2500 a day (ie Seminole, Cypress).
Despite being a golf snob, one reason I joined where I have is I don't want caddies required. Even with guests. I get why clubs do it. But I can carry my own thanks, or we can ride. It's more enjoyable for me without the extra bodies in the group.