Chris Cooley gets pulled over during radio interview
At this point in my storied career, I've transcribed dozens and dozens of Redskins radio interviews. It's like a horrible cliche now. I could do them in my sleep. I think I have. They all start to sound the same.
And yet never have I been able to transcribe a Redskins radio interview that included a guest appearance from an officer of the law.
"Hold on guys, I'm getting pulled over, so hang on," Chris Cooley said during Tuesday morning's appearance with the Sports Junkies on 106.7 The Fan.
Then the officer of the law showed up and began talking.
"Yeah, I apologize," Cooley said to him, still on the air. "I'll take it easy there."
When the officer went back to his car, Cooley explained what happened; he had rounded a corner near his house and drifted out of his lane, which the officer found to be an unsafe practice. Cooley had his seatbelt on, and was not speeding.
"Wait, he's coming back," Cooley said. "You guys talk."
As you might have guessed, Cooley was not ticketed for his infraction. He thanked the officer by name on the air, which is the perk you deserve if you pull over an athlete during a radio interview.
"I don't think there's a real ticket you can give for that," he said of his maneuver. "Nonsense driving, maybe. It was fine. Everything was fine."
Like I said, that was a first. Now I just need to transcribe a Redskins radio interview conducted from a golf course porta-potty, from a mountain-climbing expedition, and from underwater.
Cooley, if you're curious, also talked about NFL football. He admitted that the Redskins "were in bad shape last year, from the top down," and said Mike Shanahan's offense will better take advantage of the team's personnel.
"The offense is just a little more advanced from the last offense," he said. "It's still the same terminology, which is nice for me. So all the formations are called the same, a lot of the routes are called the same. It's adding extra elements to everything. We don't run the same plays out of the same formations every time. You kind of have to learn concepts of the offense, because you're doing different things all the time. Last year I ran like seven routes, total. So it's a more involved kind of moving everyone, getting everyone to know what they do type of offense."
Cooley said he wasn't bothered by trade rumors, saying he'd been a productive player for years and probably wouldn't have fetched more than a third-round pick in any case. He emphasized that "everyone" has been at Redskins Park, hitting the weight room in groups of 20, and said "It feels like a winning attitude to me, for a guy that hardly ever wins."
He said his lasting memory of the Zorn era will be "how bad we honestly were," calling last year's team "a pure disaster" and "an embarrassment." And he had nothing but praise for his new bosses.
"The quarterback in my opinion is the most important position in sports," Cooley said. "And yeah, I love Jason and I think he's an awesome guy, I'm happy for where he is now, but Donovan is a guy that's proved to be a winner. He's proved to win. So you can't take that for granted. I think that's a huge step up for us in that position.
"Another thing that I like about Mike Shanahan is that he puts players in position to succeed. He moves things around. He uses the field. He uses his players at their advantage. I felt like that was something that we didn't do as well last year; we tried to say our scheme was just good enough to beat people, we're good enough by calling plays to just beat people.
"And I think what we'll do more this year is put people in advantageous situations, especially our offensive line. Where we were last year, you can't just say everything's fixed. So you take advantage of zone schemes, you're not trying to knock guys off the ball. I mean, our center weighs 290 pounds, it's not like he's driving nose tackles five yards off the ball. So we're gonna let guys run, we're gonna try to open up holes that way.
"We bring in a couple outstanding backs. I mean, both Willie Parker and Larry Johnson have looked fantastic so far through mini-camp, and Clinton as well, so we should be able to be very successful running the ball. It's been amazing watching this offense on film with what they've been able to do....I guess I think we'll be much better. I just like the way they coach."