Clinton Portis Uncensored Part III
Chris Russell
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5/5/2010
11:37 PM
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This is the third and final installment of our nearly hour-long sit down interview with Redskins running back and former University of Miami star, Clinton Portis at his home in Northern Virginia. If you missed any of the first two parts (video/audio/written transcript), here you go,
http://shar.es/mGHbn .
106.7 the FAN: You played for the Miami Hurricanes back in some of the best days for the “U” and won a National Championship– what was that like?
CP: “It was unreal. When I step foot on the University of Miami campus, I was like this is where I’m supposed to be. I remember the class I came up with, which was Andre Johnson, Phillip Buchanon, Vernon Carey,Vince Wilfork, myself, Ken Dorsey, Jeremy Shockey, Bryant McKinnie, this is the class I entered school with in ’99. I can remember sitting here like, every conversation was like, we got something special — man we gonna win. Our first year was a rough year, we were like 9-4, we beat Georgia Tech in the Gator Bowl — and nobody was satisfied. It was like instant, let’s get back to work. We were in the Top-5 or the Top-10 for the first time in I don’t how long, and we went up to Washington to play the Huskies. We ended up losing. I remember the feeling. I tell people all the time that’s the one plane ride I don’t remember. I don’t remember coming back from Washington. I don’t remember nobody talking on the plane. That feeling was so empty, it was so bad. We were so close to being at the top in my sophomore year. All of a sudden, we lose and it was gone. That was the last time I lost in college. I think everybody just adapted to the idea, that we were not going to lose again, and we didn’t.”
106.7 the FAN: What was it like to follow that year up with the Rose Bowl National Championship win?
CP: “I think it was great, man. When you sit and you look at that roster. I’m playing with Ed Reed, Ed Reed will probably go down as one of the top safeties of all time. Who was Ed Reed’s backup? It was a young Sean Taylor. You think of who Clinton Portis’ backup was? It was Willis McGahee and Frank Gore. And you look at Andre Johnson, I can remember him just waiting in the wings of Santana Moss and Reggie Wayne. Just think of Shockey being on the field. I can remember, Winslow having the aggravation that he wasn’t playing and Shockey was playing. I can think of DJ Williams, Jonathan Vilma. The list goes on — we had so much talent – and we had so much going on, it was really impossible for us to lose.”
106.7 the FAN: You mentioned Sean Taylor, and your tribute to him – lifting up the jersey. How much does his loss drive you to live the life he wasn’t given the opportunity to live?
CP: “There are a few moments in life that I carry, you know of memories. I can remember getting in a car wreck. Myself, Jarrett Payton, and Clint Hurtt — who is one of the best recruiters in the University of Miami. We got into a car wreck going into my junior year. That whole day, I knew I wasn’t supposed to be in that car. I accepted death at 19 [years old], like I’m not getting out of this car. I stopped Phillip Buchanon, who was my college roommate. He got ready to jump in the car. I was like ‘No Phil, don’t get in.’ I remember stopping Phil from getting in that car and him saying like ‘what the hell are you telling me not to get in.’ He just had that look in his eye, like what’s going on. I just felt like — we weren’t going to get back to this destination. We got into a bad accident that day, that’s a memory that sticks out.”
“The next one, I used to always call Drew [Rosenhaus] all the time and I was like “how are they going to pay Sean T?’ He was like everything is going to work itself out. With Sean coming up on his contract, and being so dominant and so rare — how do you pay him? Do you pay him as a top safety or do you give him like Peyton Manning kind of money? I remember talking to Sean and he was like, and he was I’m not really concerned about that right now. He was like it’s going to come, it will be cool. I’m just working hard to be the best. A lot of people say ‘oh I’m not worried about that money.’ This man just reached a stage in life, where he was just happy. He had his little girl came along. He was just at a free for fall. He kind of fell back away from the spotlight. I remember the last day I talked to him – as he walked out of the locker room, it was just like the doors open and the light shined. At the moment, you don’t think that’s the last time. Now that he gone, every time I siting in that chair, every time our lockers are next to each other, you look over and see those door open and shut and you just remember that white light that came behind it.”
“Who ever would have thought that would be the last conversation, the last opportunity, to hang out with Sean. When you come out of that tunnel, that’s the first thing I look for is that # 21. That strength, just coming from 21. Just that mindset, even when you don’t feel like doing it, even when you think it’s getting old, when you tired of fighting. And you ready to just ‘F*** this football, and the hell with these fans. The attitude I try to adapt is Sean, because he never let any of that bother him.”
“I remember when he was going through the DUI, which happened right here on the highway beside the house. We tried to rush and hurry up and get there and talk the police out of getting him. They took him off. He got off from that. Then the shooting accident, I remember calling Sean and I was like “Bro, I don’t know going on, but you need to get up here” and “ he was like nah – CP I didn’t do anything, everything cool. He was just calm, he was like ‘ CP I’m cool, I’m not even in Miami and I didn’t do it.” You think of those conversations, and how he accepted his position and found a way to tune everything else out. The player that he became after that, what he elevated his game too, after everybody wrote him off — is really the situation that I feel like I am in now.”
“I want to elevate my game, to show, to just hands down to show – it was really no competition for me.”
106.7 the FAN: The Redskins decision to remove Sean Taylor’s locker from Redskins Park to Fed Ex Field — Is that the right decision. I didn’t know Sean personally, just as a football player, but LaVar Arrington talks about how special he is, obviously he was special to you, was it the right thing to do to share Sean’s legacy?
CP: “I mean it’s different, but that was an organization call. It’s different, not seeing it there. It’s hit or miss, it’s great to have it on display for the rest of the world, but his locker was in that locker room. That’s where it belongs. That was up to the organization, that was a decision they made and you can’t question any of that.”
“As far as the conversation about LaVar. I lost a lot of respect for LaVar at that moment, speaking at Sean’s funeral. To get up, I really thought that was, umm, I don’t know what you call that. LaVar ain’t know Sean like that. For the people who did seeing how LaVar was going to portray — I remember me and Sean was going to jump LaVar, you know, for throwing pie at Sean’s face his rookie year, and trying to haze Sean, and be the tough guy. He felt like it was a joke. We didn’t like that S***. For all the attention LaVar claim, and that him and Sean was cool — they wasn’t cool. Sean ain’t F*** with LaVar. Sometime, people should STOP (long pause) I don’t think you should do that. If you cool with somebody, or you know somebody, you knew ‘em. Don’t go and portray, set out an image like ’this is your buddy, this is your pal’ like you all hung, when y’all really didn’t. I don’t think that’s fair man.”
106.7 the FAN: How does Clinton Portis like to get away and relax either outside or inside this beautiful home, with your pool table and everything you have?
CP: “I think decorate. I love to decorate. I love designing, I love shopping. Listening to music, writing poetry, watching movies. Traveling. I think, Within all those things, you can find a peace of mind. I think the best thing Clinton Portis like to do is relax, like really fall back into couch and get away from it.”
“Inside these walls, I’m comfortable, I’m fine — I feel like this is my rest haven. Outside of them walls, I don’t know who happy for me, I don’t know who is against me. I don’t know who want me away from here, and who beg me to stay. I try to spend a lot of my time inside these walls, where my fish don’t talk back. If I want the tv on, so I can hear what the outside world think, I turn it on. When I don’t feel like I can put up with the outside world, I don’t leave outside of here, or I won’t turn the tv on — or when I turn the tv on; I watch a movie.”
“I think my get away is really old school R & B for music, or blues where people tell stories, because it’s different. Just to hear everybody else’s story. A lot of times you think you are the only person going through something, but when you turn on the music — it’s like man we all got the same problems. It’s no matter how much fame, how much money or how many people around, how many people claim they love you. You got the people who are always going to be there, you got people who are going to pretend ‘oh I got your back’ and all of a sudden, they vanish.”
“Then you got the newcomers — and it’s like hit or miss, some are for you, some are against you. You never know how long it’s going to last. So I think , you get into these confinements, you got to be appreciative, you got to be relaxed, you got to be comfortable and that’s what I tried to do with this house.”
106.7 the FAN: Is there a ‘money’ movie that you pop in when you’ve had a bad day or week and everybody is on your behind?
CP: “You know, it’s ‘Five Heartbeats.’ Hands down. It shows the good, the bad, the dark side, the bright side and it shows the reunion. I think in that one movie, you get a life lesson. If I really need to laugh, well ‘Hangover’ just recently got out, but one of my other all-time favorites had to be ’Life’ or ‘Harlem Knights’ where I can stay in the house and just watch a movie and I’m laughing. You know, and kind of take you away and help you forget what’s going on. Just that movie that’s going to get you through, it’s ‘Five Heartbeats.’
106.7 the FAN: What does family and support from friends mean to you, considering everything that you go through in this area and just about being a football player?
CP: “Sometimes, family — being around family, you got to surround yourself with family. You go from that high horse of people. You go from all that ‘rah-rah’ and all that excitement, and let me get your autograph. You go back to being that kid, that they raised and they whooped. Everybody tell you how ‘you were just a little crybaby back then’ or you remember how ‘I beat you up’ and it’s like ‘YEAH, try me now.’
“Sometimes family is great to be around. At the same time, I think family is the biggest issue. Family doesn’t realize how much of a burden they put on you. I think everybody comes into this game, wanting to support family, wanting to take care of Mom. I want to help this person, I want to help that person, you come to the realization that you can’t save everybody, everybody can’t get the big fancy house, everybody can’t get the brand new car. A lot of people turn sour in family. That drains you. To see how, like I never thought growing up how money would separate money from me and you. I never thought I’d see this side of you. If I had to give, then I’d give it to you. If I don’t, it’s like ‘I would give you the shirt off my back’ and I don’t blame you for giving me the shirt off your back, we can get another shirt. Family is a plus and a minus.”
“As far as friends, I keep a close circle of friends. Everybody else, you got to let go. You can’t hold on too people. People are always going to come up and say ‘ you remember I came to the game, I gave u a shirt at a game.’ Hey, appreciate the shirt, man. That shirt was promoting you something in your favor. I never went shirtless growing up. Everybody come up and say ‘oh remember this, and remember that’ – I don’t remember that man. I’ve been in the league ten years, I’ve met a million people, ever since. ‘I went to high school with you.’ I’ve gone to college, I’ve been to the NFL, I lived in Denver, I lived in D.C, I lived in Miami, I lived in Atlanta. I met too many people to sit here and remember you.”
“I think you have to be real to yourself. I think you have to understand when you have to let people go and when you have to open up too people. The best thing about it, is being yourself. You have to stay humble. You gotta stay yourself. I don’t feel there is a day that goes by, when I step outside these doors, where I feel like that I want to be someone different. I want to be Clinton Portis. The Clinton Portis name alone, says the good and the bad, speaks of the hard times and speaks of the good times. There’s been many of both. I don’t want to go out and be somebody else.”
“I don’t dream about being anybody else. I don’t dream to switch shoes with Obama. and see how it is to be President. I know he got a lot going on. You look at the economy today, and where the economy at and how many more smiles people have, compared to a couple of years ago when everybody was doing bad. That alone, should say, ‘You should be praising President Obama.’ Every time you turn on the news and it’s like ’he needs to be out of here, when is the next election’ and [they say] ‘he didn’t do this, or he didn’t do that.’ Think about the stuff he did do. He can’t do everything in one day.”
“I say be yourself, man, be content with being yourself. Stop having so much negativity, and wanting to be others and wanting to trade shoes. You never know what your shoes are going to have in them. You might have on a new pair of shoes, but your feet could stink. How can I say I want your shoes?”
For more on Clinton Portis — check out www.ClintonPortis.com and the Clinton Portis Foundation with details available on his website as well.