Parents and Yard Signs about their kids (1 Viewer)

[Chemical X]

“my 5th grader is a bed wetter!”

 

[Zow]

As somebody who practices family law and criminal defense, this is a horrible idea solely for your child's safety.

Can you expand on this?

Sure.

Most people in the country are harmless. A few, unfortunately, are not. Some of those few may be angry family members looking for a child despite orders from a court indicating no contact or some such. A significant minority of those few, but still a number greater than 0, very well may be looking through neighborhoods for homes where children reside and may be accessible. I say this with confidence as I have been involved in a few court cases where these were the facts. Accordingly, I find any benefit to the dopamine rush a parent may feel for making his kid feel good with a yard sign to be outweighed by the minor yet real risk that a predator could glean information about one's child from the sign.

For me personally, based on actual case facts I've encountered firsthand at my job, my kids' windows and our house(s) have had alarms. In our new house, all their bedrooms are on the second floor. We also significantly limit social media posts with them in it to be non-public.

 

[Eephus]

Happy to live in a city with no front yards

 

[Tom Servo]

Probably 5-6 years ago parents in our school district began putting signs in their front yards with their kid's names. It started with football players, and then cheerleaders and then other sports teams. And of course they leave them up even in the offseason.

The past few years parents began putting up signs with their high school senior pictures and last spring it had gotten to the point that people are doing it for kindergarten and grade school "graduations".

I find this bizarre but then I am an old guy. Is this normal everywhere now?

Never seen this before. Your district is weird

No signs about a neighbor kid being QB1 on the local varsity team? Football signs are ubiquitous around here. But then again, I live in Texas.

Same here in PA. Graduation signs began around here during the pandemic. We had one when our younger son graduated, but he kept moving it around to various places in our yard.

 

[Godsbrother]

House I walk by has a sign that says “our son is a black belt”, or something like that. Anyway, I saw a kid mowing the lawn one day, maybe 11 or 12 years old. I went Cosmo Kramer on his punk *** and got him in a full nelson in less than 3 minutes. High tailed it out of there and haven’t made it back to that part of the neighborhood since.

I have no idea if this was “the black belt” son, but I bet they took that damn sign down!

You better hope it wasn't his big brother

 

[GordonGekko]

People scaled up from the "Christmas letters", the one where it's unsolicited and you get a short one sentence holiday greeting, then a print out with a ham fisted photo of their entire family and a point by point update on what's "Been Going On With Family X" for the last year.

I usually draw penises all over those before returning to sender. Then if they ask me about, I just play dumb pretending like I have no idea what happened.

I'm a lot older than everyone here, so many of you were either not born or too young to understand what happened in the 80s. There was a period in the 80s where kidnappers would go to a school and tell a kid that they were sent by their parents to pick them up, because their parents couldn't get there themselves. And that they were a friend of their parents or a coworker of their parents. Or they would tell them that their parents got into a car accident and they were sent to take the kid to the hospital.

Dennis Lehane did not just magically conjure up the core premise of Mystic River out of nowhere.

There was some social engineering at work in some cases. Some of the predators deep scouted the areas around and after school time. Watched which kids got picked up and by whom. Then likely worked the angle to see what info they could get. (i.e. if the kid was picked up in a pickup truck full of landscaping tools in the back) One situation I remember hearing about, someone tried to lure a little girl into a van by offering a Jordache purse.

It was enough of a problem back then that mainstream family oriented TV shows started covering some aspects of the issue. Diff'rent Strokes, The Facts Of Life, etc, etc.

Many people here have never traveled outside of the "Western World" Those who have extensively, like myself, are generally more cautious about what happens around their family and children. There is a level of chaos and suffering that I would wager the majority here just don't understand that happens on a routine basis for children just about everywhere else. Many people here have no idea how fortunate they are to be born into freedom and abundance relative to the rest of the world. Many people here are just plain ungrateful if you observe them over time.

Humility is a survival adaptation with the reality of "load sharing" regarding work output for basic necessities in group/community formats. In a society with abundance, arrogance is tolerated. But most don't understand that turning up your nose again and again at others in public is a fast and easy way to die all across recorded human history.

Parents who have their young children kidnapped live in a constant state of self torture. They revisit all of their choices, asking themselves if they had just done something differently, just one small thing, then maybe their child would still be there in front of them. Anyone here want that to be you? For those who want to roll that kind of loaded set of dice, go on, blather all your children's private information out into the world.

Make no mistake - There predators out there who will snatch children, make a film out of them, cut the throats of those kids and then will go cook themselves dinner and sleep soundly at night.

Never be arrogant about your children. Life has a way of punishing those that do.

 

[The Z Machine]

Disturbing IMO.

 

[Gally]

My son's soccer team had a kid who was a statistician for the varsity team. His brother played on the team, and this kid apparently tracked everything and gave the info to the coaches to help with their game planning and such.

At the end-of-year awards ceremony they called him up on stage and and awarded him a varsity letter. It was really cool.

When I was coaching HS baseball i would have killed for a kid that knew how to keep score well enough so that I didn't have to go back through every AB to correct 75% of game. It was terrible. This service is invaluable for a coach.

 

[Manster]

It's the equivalent of posting all your kids stuff on FB.....no one cares!.....except for family

 

[NutterButter]

People scaled up from the "Christmas letters", the one where it's unsolicited and you get a short one sentence holiday greeting, then a print out with a ham fisted photo of their entire family and a point by point update on what's "Been Going On With Family X" for the last year.

I usually draw penises all over those before returning to sender. Then if they ask me about, I just play dumb pretending like I have no idea what happened.

I'm a lot older than everyone here, so many of you were either not born or too young to understand what happened in the 80s. There was a period in the 80s where kidnappers would go to a school and tell a kid that they were sent by their parents to pick them up, because their parents couldn't get there themselves. And that they were a friend of their parents or a coworker of their parents. Or they would tell them that their parents got into a car accident and they were sent to take the kid to the hospital.

Dennis Lehane did not just magically conjure up the core premise of Mystic River out of nowhere.

There was some social engineering at work in some cases. Some of the predators deep scouted the areas around and after school time. Watched which kids got picked up and by whom. Then likely worked the angle to see what info they could get. (i.e. if the kid was picked up in a pickup truck full of landscaping tools in the back) One situation I remember hearing about, someone tried to lure a little girl into a van by offering a Jordache purse.

It was enough of a problem back then that mainstream family oriented TV shows started covering some aspects of the issue. Diff'rent Strokes, The Facts Of Life, etc, etc.

Many people here have never traveled outside of the "Western World" Those who have extensively, like myself, are generally more cautious about what happens around their family and children. There is a level of chaos and suffering that I would wager the majority here just don't understand that happens on a routine basis for children just about everywhere else. Many people here have no idea how fortunate they are to be born into freedom and abundance relative to the rest of the world. Many people here are just plain ungrateful if you observe them over time.

Humility is a survival adaptation with the reality of "load sharing" regarding work output for basic necessities in group/community formats. In a society with abundance, arrogance is tolerated. But most don't understand that turning up your nose again and again at others in public is a fast and easy way to die all across recorded human history.

Parents who have their young children kidnapped live in a constant state of self torture. They revisit all of their choices, asking themselves if they had just done something differently, just one small thing, then maybe their child would still be there in front of them. Anyone here want that to be you? For those who want to roll that kind of loaded set of dice, go on, blather all your children's private information out into the world.

Make no mistake - There predators out there who will snatch children, make a film out of them, cut the throats of those kids and then will go cook themselves dinner and sleep soundly at night.

Never be arrogant about your children. Life has a way of punishing those that do.

My drawing of penises on christmas cards caused you to respond with this?

 

[Gally]

My drawing of penises on christmas cards caused you to respond with this?

He is a lot older. Penis drawings are beneath him

 

[GordonGekko]

People scaled up from the "Christmas letters", the one where it's unsolicited and you get a short one sentence holiday greeting, then a print out with a ham fisted photo of their entire family and a point by point update on what's "Been Going On With Family X" for the last year.

I usually draw penises all over those before returning to sender. Then if they ask me about, I just play dumb pretending like I have no idea what happened.

I'm a lot older than everyone here, so many of you were either not born or too young to understand what happened in the 80s. There was a period in the 80s where kidnappers would go to a school and tell a kid that they were sent by their parents to pick them up, because their parents couldn't get there themselves. And that they were a friend of their parents or a coworker of their parents. Or they would tell them that their parents got into a car accident and they were sent to take the kid to the hospital.

Dennis Lehane did not just magically conjure up the core premise of Mystic River out of nowhere.

There was some social engineering at work in some cases. Some of the predators deep scouted the areas around and after school time. Watched which kids got picked up and by whom. Then likely worked the angle to see what info they could get. (i.e. if the kid was picked up in a pickup truck full of landscaping tools in the back) One situation I remember hearing about, someone tried to lure a little girl into a van by offering a Jordache purse.

It was enough of a problem back then that mainstream family oriented TV shows started covering some aspects of the issue. Diff'rent Strokes, The Facts Of Life, etc, etc.

Many people here have never traveled outside of the "Western World" Those who have extensively, like myself, are generally more cautious about what happens around their family and children. There is a level of chaos and suffering that I would wager the majority here just don't understand that happens on a routine basis for children just about everywhere else. Many people here have no idea how fortunate they are to be born into freedom and abundance relative to the rest of the world. Many people here are just plain ungrateful if you observe them over time.

Humility is a survival adaptation with the reality of "load sharing" regarding work output for basic necessities in group/community formats. In a society with abundance, arrogance is tolerated. But most don't understand that turning up your nose again and again at others in public is a fast and easy way to die all across recorded human history.

Parents who have their young children kidnapped live in a constant state of self torture. They revisit all of their choices, asking themselves if they had just done something differently, just one small thing, then maybe their child would still be there in front of them. Anyone here want that to be you? For those who want to roll that kind of loaded set of dice, go on, blather all your children's private information out into the world.

Make no mistake - There predators out there who will snatch children, make a film out of them, cut the throats of those kids and then will go cook themselves dinner and sleep soundly at night.

Never be arrogant about your children. Life has a way of punishing those that do.

My drawing of penises on christmas cards caused you to respond with this?

Amber’s disappearance changed the fabric of Pinole

Amber’s disappearance changed the fabric of Pinole

www.eastbaytimes.com

Kidnapping of Amber Swartz–Garcia - Wikipedia

en.wikipedia.org

For 21 years, Pinole City Council meetings have begun with a simple and solemn message: “Remembrance. Amber Swartz is still missing. Anyone with information is urged to contact the Pinole Police Department....”

Seven-year-old Amber disappeared from the front yard of her Savage Avenue home June 3, 1988. On Monday, Pinole police Chief Paul Clancy announced that convicted child murderer Curtis Dean Anderson, interviewed in prison by the FBI in November 2007 shortly before he died of illness, confessed that he abducted Amber, took her to a motel in Arizona, killed her and left her body somewhere in the desert.

Monday’s announcement confirmed the essence, if not the details, of what many presumed was Amber’s inevitable fate. But it brought only limited closure to Amber’s mother, Kim Swartz, and to the community that mourns the little girl and its own “loss of innocence,” as many residents term it.

“It’s pretty much kind of the same for us,” said Kim Swartz, who moved out of town sometime after Amber was kidnapped. “We know what they’re saying — but we don’t have her.”...Clancy said, “We would still like to find that bone, that DNA, that something that says, ‘This is Amber.'”

Councilwoman Mary Horton, who was a classmate of Kim Swartz during their Pinole Valley High School days, said, “For me it presents some closure on an incident that truly stained the community over 20 years ago....“Pinole was never the same after.”

Pinole historically has fancied itself the type of small town where “big-time crime and big-time criminals didn’t happen,” said George Vincent, co-author of the soon-to-be-published “Images of America: Pinole.”....“When I grew up, safety was not something you worried about,” he said. “Everyone knew everyone, and everyone looked out for each other’s kids.....June 3, 1988, changed all that,” said Vincent, who taught sixth grade at Ellerhorst Elementary School, not far from Amber’s home, when she disappeared. “That was the date I started keeping my kids a little closer to me.”

Amber Swartz Park, a 2 -acre open space adjacent to Ellerhorst Elementary, was dedicated in 2006....The generation of Vincent’s daughter, a contemporary of Amber’s, grew up in a very different reality....“I think parents were more conscious and aware, warning us, telling us to beware of strangers, to pay attention to weird cars, to watch out more for anything,” said Anne-Marie Vincent, 28, who was a first-grader at Stewart Elementary School when Amber was a second-grader there....

....On May 3, 1980, Pinole police Officer Floyd “Bernie” Swartz, father of the unborn Amber, was shot to death along Pinole Creek off Dolores Court by a parolee and murder suspect that police were seeking to arrest; police arrested James Odle later that day. Odle is on death row at San Quentin....“When Bernie Swartz was killed, it kind of dumped the real world in Pinole’s lap,” Vincent said. And eight years later, “After Amber’s kidnapping, it was a whole new world. The town psyche was put on guard.”

“For our younger daughter, it was very traumatizing,” said Christie Vincent, George’s wife. “She didn’t know why her friend had disappeared.”.....“After school, we’d play together,” said Anne-Marie Vincent. “We’d share our toys, our Barbies. I have those little memories. When I got out of class, she’d be waiting by the door to my class.”...By the time Anne-Marie was in high school, she and her peers rarely talked about Amber’s disappearance anymore. Her mother believes it’s more a matter of denial borne of pain than oblivion....Anne-Marie has a son who is 8 — less than a year older than Amber was when she disappeared 21 years ago.....“I tell him, just be careful if anyone stops and says, ‘I got some candy,’ or ‘Your mom told me to give you a ride,'” Anne-Marie Vincent said. “Just walk away; come back to the house; ask me before you go into anybody’s house. Let me know what’s going on.”...She has not told her son about her own childhood experience with a friend virtually the same age he is now...

Councilman Roy Swearingen, who was Pinole’s mayor when Amber was kidnapped, said he thinks the council will continue to mention Amber one way or another at every meeting."


******

The media optics perspective are the parts of this story that no one talks about. When this case was fresh and in the national daily media cycle, there was a point where the story would begin to cycle out for other news. For a parent, mass exposure through the MSM is the best hope left, to keep that frame of reference of the missing child into the minds and eyes of the public at large. Remember this was before widespread social media and common usage of cell phones and in the pre-Internet era.

The part of the story no one talks about is the family of Swartz-Garcia, begging every news outlet, local TV stations and newspapers to keep the story running.

And no one talks about the grifter cycle that shows up afterwards. Trying to scam the surviving family left behind with false hope for money.

This could be any one of you. It could be any of your children. The average working class person has few to no options in a nightmare scenario like this. Because Swartz-Garcia was a legacy to law enforcement, great pains were taken to make this a national "Red Ball" As much that could be done in this era was done, but the news cycle had to keep churning forward. And everyone, over time, forgot the carnage left behind. Except the little girl's mother.

What makes any of you so special, so different, so unique, so powerful, so immune from the horrors of this life where you would automatically be exempt from some tragedy like this? The utter arrogance of it all.

So, for those who want to troll it on some more, go ahead. Speed on forward and start blabbing to strangers about your children and critical information that could potentially be weaponized against them. It's your life, your kids, your choice, your potential carnage.

 

[Leroy Hoard]

Happy to live in a city with no front yards

I would miss telling kids to get off my lawn.

 

[The Big Donkey]

maybe I'm weird. I wouldn't be advertising kids in my house. I'd lean more towards a "I have three dobermans and a cane corso" yard sign.

 

[need2know]

Probably 5-6 years ago parents in our school district began putting signs in their front yards with their kid's names. It started with football players, and then cheerleaders and then other sports teams. And of course they leave them up even in the offseason.

The past few years parents began putting up signs with their high school senior pictures and last spring it had gotten to the point that people are doing it for kindergarten and grade school "graduations".

I find this bizarre but then I am an old guy. Is this normal everywhere now?

Normal. Yes. Dumb. Absolutely

 

[pollardsvision]

Never seen this personally but I live in a starter neighborhood. Not a lot of families with multiple school aged kids

But I think they did this in both Friday Night Lights and Varsity Blues.

 

[pollardsvision]

Now I'm just curious..... If somebody's son throws four interceptions one night and goes from QB1 to QB2, is it the parent or the kid that's supposed to pay for the new yard sign?

 

[Long Ball Larry]

I find this bizarre but then I am an old guy. Is this normal everywhere now?

I'm from the old school, I don't send letters or postcards or birthday cards or any of that. If I want to make a gesture of goodwill, I'll do it face to face. Or I'll give someone an envelope with some cash in it.

thank you, richie aprile

 

[jobarules]

Graduation signs started here in 2020 when COVID shut down in person graduations and parents were being robbed of watching their child graduate.

 

[belljr]

Graduation signs started here in 2020 when COVID shut down in person graduations and parents were being robbed of watching their child graduate.

Yeah thats about all i get - we get on occasional "team sign" i'm guessing as part of a fund raiser but not individualized. "San Demis Football" for example

 

[IvanKaramazov]

Probably 5-6 years ago parents in our school district began putting signs in their front yards with their kid's names. It started with football players, and then cheerleaders and then other sports teams. And of course they leave them up even in the offseason.

The past few years parents began putting up signs with their high school senior pictures and last spring it had gotten to the point that people are doing it for kindergarten and grade school "graduations".

I find this bizarre but then I am an old guy. Is this normal everywhere now?

Yes, and I agree that it's ridiculous.

 

[Zow]

maybe I'm weird. I wouldn't be advertising kids in my house. I'd lean more towards a "I have three dobermans and a cane corso" yard sign.

You're not weird.

 

[Zow]

Graduation signs started here in 2020 when COVID shut down in person graduations and parents were being robbed of watching their child graduate.

at the notion that the average passerby would care at all that some kid graduated high school.

I get that graduation is for the parents,* but a yard sign is so dumb.

*The biggest fight I ever got in with my mom was when she forced me to miss a significant baseball game for my high school graduation. I still now wish I went to that baseball game (we beat a rival team and I really wish I could have been there), but as a parent I now understand my mom's position. My argument, nonetheless, is that high school graduation simply isn't a notable accomplishment for children without learning disabilities. Now, this analysis changes if the student is, say, valedictorian or some such, but if one just passes by showing up and providing minimal effort (like I did) it's not an accomplishment to be celebrated IMO. It is, however, a "life event" so I can understand attending if there simply is nothing better to do.

 

[the moops]

Sure.

Most people in the country are harmless. A few, unfortunately, are not. Some of those few may be angry family members looking for a child despite orders from a court indicating no contact or some such. A significant minority of those few, but still a number greater than 0, very well may be looking through neighborhoods for homes where children reside and may be accessible. I say this with confidence as I have been involved in a few court cases where these were the facts. Accordingly, I find any benefit to the dopamine rush a parent may feel for making his kid feel good with a yard sign to be outweighed by the minor yet real risk that a predator could glean information about one's child from the sign.

For me personally, based on actual case facts I've encountered firsthand at my job, my kids' windows and our house(s) have had alarms. In our new house, all their bedrooms are on the second floor. We also significantly limit social media posts with them in it to be non-public.

Well yes, if you have this situation than you definitely should not be advertising that the kid lives where he lives. I think this whole thing is dumb and I would never do it, but I think the fear thing is way overblown. Do you let your kids eat halloween candy or do you save all the fentanyl for yourself?

 

[Gally]

Yeah thats about all i get - we get on occasional "team sign" i'm guessing as part of a fund raiser but not individualized. "San Demis Football" for example

It's San Dimas...........get it right next time

 

[Anarchy99]

We had never seen any yard signs about kids until the pandemic hit. Our son was a HS senior at the time, and our town plans a week of fun stuff for the graduating class at the end of the year. They were supposed to go to a Red Sox game, have a catered meal and a dance at an upscale restaurant, go on a harbor cruise in Boston, spend a day at an amusement park, have a cookout at a beach, etc. Bear in mind the parents had to pay for all these activities, but it was supposed to be a bunch of fun outings for the kids. Enter the plague, and none of those things happened. Of course, they kept all the money we paid, and no refunds were ever given. Since the kids didn't get to do any of that, the HS made up the yard signs for the kids for all their groups and activities. We had a bunch of them for our son . . . probably 5 of them (graduating, sports teams, activities). I would have much preferred our money back. Since then, those signs are everywhere for both school and out of school programs and organizations. Many of them have pictures of the kids on them. Not so sure that that's all that advisable, as advertising that "a high school girl lives here" seems like it could be asking for trouble.

 

[Zow]

Sure.

Most people in the country are harmless. A few, unfortunately, are not. Some of those few may be angry family members looking for a child despite orders from a court indicating no contact or some such. A significant minority of those few, but still a number greater than 0, very well may be looking through neighborhoods for homes where children reside and may be accessible. I say this with confidence as I have been involved in a few court cases where these were the facts. Accordingly, I find any benefit to the dopamine rush a parent may feel for making his kid feel good with a yard sign to be outweighed by the minor yet real risk that a predator could glean information about one's child from the sign.

For me personally, based on actual case facts I've encountered firsthand at my job, my kids' windows and our house(s) have had alarms. In our new house, all their bedrooms are on the second floor. We also significantly limit social media posts with them in it to be non-public.

Well yes, if you have this situation than you definitely should not be advertising that the kid lives where he lives. I think this whole thing is dumb and I would never do it, but I think the fear thing is way overblown. Do you let your kids eat halloween candy or do you save all the fentanyl for yourself?

Do I think it happens often? No, I don't. But, due to my job, I've seen these events occur. I've experienced situations where children were abducted by parents or other family members who were ordered to have no contact or some such. I've witnessed firsthand a father break down in court - in partial anger towards the defendant as well as some misplaced guilt towards himself - due to an unknown person prying open his ~5 year old daughter's bedroom window while she was sleeping, physically removing her from her bed, and doing things that arguably disprove the existence of an active and omniscient god to the child on the lawn a few feet away.

I let my kids eat their Halloween candy. Contrary to the above, in the thousands of criminal cases I've been involved with I have not seen tainted Halloween candy. I also imagine my kids get more out of Trick-or-Treating than a yard sign. So, again, it's just a cost-benefit analysis where Halloween candy from our neighborhood is worth it but some yard sign openly advertising the general age of my children and where they may attend school is not.

 

[Gally]

Do I think it happens often? No, I don't.

Do you think the occurrences have risen over the years? Kids don't play outside, walk to school on their own, stay out until the street lights come on, etc. Parents seem to be clamping down on the freedoms kids once had. Are there actually more abductions/shenanigans/etc against kids to warrant that lockdown or has media increased the paranoia?

I don't know that answer. I am sure there are some areas of the country where things have gotten more dangerous for kids but I also believe there are many areas that are plenty safe and kids should be allowed this type of freedom. I just wonder where rational risk deduction ends and over protection begins.

 

[FBG26]

Explained to my wife privately "you realize we're basically advertising an elementary school kid lives here, right?".

All of the bikes and toys in my yard would tell you that too. No need for a sign.

 

[bigbottom]

Graduation signs started here in 2020 when COVID shut down in person graduations and parents were being robbed of watching their child graduate.

Yeah thats about all i get - we get on occasional "team sign" i'm guessing as part of a fund raiser but not individualized. "San Demis Football" for example

I've seen both generalized sports signs like you mention, as well as some that are individualized with either name or jersey number. I've also seen signs for membership in the school band. And then of course the above-mentioned AP Test score signs. I'm glad those appear to be isolated to my suburb.

 

[Zow]

Do I think it happens often? No, I don't.

Do you think the occurrences have risen over the years? Kids don't play outside, walk to school on their own, stay out until the street lights come on, etc. Parents seem to be clamping down on the freedoms kids once had. Are there actually more abductions/shenanigans/etc against kids to warrant that lockdown or has media increased the paranoia?

I don't know that answer. I am sure there are some areas of the country where things have gotten more dangerous for kids but I also believe there are many areas that are plenty safe and kids should be allowed this type of freedom. I just wonder where rational risk deduction ends and over protection begins.

I don't know the exact answer either. My best guess is, for many of the reasons you stated, that at least unknown/third party abductions/sex crimes are down. I see a lot of heinous stuff in my work, and a pure complete unknown assailant on a child type situation is very rare. Most cases, instead, involve a family member or a known person in authority with direct access to the child (e.g. teacher, religious leader, etc.).

If it helps to clarify what I'm saying, I have four small kids and I am not in a constant state of fear for them or anything like that even experiencing/seeing what I have. But, since I see little to no downside in not publicly advertising that I got kids and where we live (whether on social media, with yard signs, etc.), I don't do it. I also have an alarm system and Ring cameras set up on my house and my kids' bedrooms are all inaccessible from the ground level. These are relatively easy things that don't seem to have a downside, so I don't think they amount to "overprotection" even if the risk of an event I'm trying to avoid is minimal.

Full disclosure: Due to my job, I have had my life directly threatened on a couple of occasions. Further, my kids are adopted through the foster care system and have biological parents out there somewhere. So, I have reason to be a bit more careful probably than the average parent.

 

[Gally]

I don't know the exact answer either. My best guess is, for many of the reasons you stated, that at least unknown/third party abductions/sex crimes are down.

I wasn't trying to give reasons for these type of things being down necessarily but I guess there could be some correlation. I was more asking if the overprotection was necessary because these types of things are happening more often warrant this approach. I wonder if the increase in media coverage for these type of things make it seem like it happens more now than in the past so parents react accordingly because of an increase in media coverage or because of an actual increase in incidents.

I doubt that is an easy thing to quantify. My gut feel is that in some areas the worry is valid and in other's not so much. Obviously this is a risk assessment. Is the risk of letting your kids loose in the neighborhood worth it? It's just a shame that kids don't seem to be allowed to go out and play with other kids in the neighborhood. It just doesn't happen anymore.

However, like you said, the majority of the bad is from contentious custody battles and the stranger danger aspect is very minimal.

 

[belljr]

I don't know the exact answer either. My best guess is, for many of the reasons you stated, that at least unknown/third party abductions/sex crimes are down.

I wasn't trying to give reasons for these type of things being down necessarily but I guess there could be some correlation. I was more asking if the overprotection was necessary because these types of things are happening more often warrant this approach. I wonder if the increase in media coverage for these type of things make it seem like it happens more now than in the past so parents react accordingly because of an increase in media coverage or because of an actual increase in incidents.

I doubt that is an easy thing to quantify. My gut feel is that in some areas the worry is valid and in other's not so much. Obviously this is a risk assessment. Is the risk of letting your kids loose in the neighborhood worth it? It's just a shame that kids don't seem to be allowed to go out and play with other kids in the neighborhood. It just doesn't happen anymore.

However, like you said, the majority of the bad is from contentious custody battles and the stranger danger aspect is very minimal.

Our neighborhood has tons of kids running amok..... actually feel bad for my daughter as when we moved in most kids her age moved out so she was always a little too old or a little too young for the group

 

[General Malaise]

Graduation signs started here in 2020 when COVID shut down in person graduations and parents were being robbed of watching their child graduate.

at the notion that the average passerby would care at all that some kid graduated high school.

I get that graduation is for the parents,* but a yard sign is so dumb.

*The biggest fight I ever got in with my mom was when she forced me to miss a significant baseball game for my high school graduation. I still now wish I went to that baseball game (we beat a rival team and I really wish I could have been there), but as a parent I now understand my mom's position. My argument, nonetheless, is that high school graduation simply isn't a notable accomplishment for children without learning disabilities. Now, this analysis changes if the student is, say, valedictorian or some such, but if one just passes by showing up and providing minimal effort (like I did) it's not an accomplishment to be celebrated IMO. It is, however, a "life event" so I can understand attending if there simply is nothing better to do.

You might feel differently when the time comes for your kids to graduate HS.

 

[Zow]

Graduation signs started here in 2020 when COVID shut down in person graduations and parents were being robbed of watching their child graduate.

at the notion that the average passerby would care at all that some kid graduated high school.

I get that graduation is for the parents,* but a yard sign is so dumb.

*The biggest fight I ever got in with my mom was when she forced me to miss a significant baseball game for my high school graduation. I still now wish I went to that baseball game (we beat a rival team and I really wish I could have been there), but as a parent I now understand my mom's position. My argument, nonetheless, is that high school graduation simply isn't a notable accomplishment for children without learning disabilities. Now, this analysis changes if the student is, say, valedictorian or some such, but if one just passes by showing up and providing minimal effort (like I did) it's not an accomplishment to be celebrated IMO. It is, however, a "life event" so I can understand attending if there simply is nothing better to do.

You might feel differently when the time comes for your kids to graduate HS.

Wouldn't be the first time I've had my mind changed on something through life experience.

To be clear, my position rests mostly on a critique of myself. By this I mean I barely tried in high school. I showed up, did enough to get good enough grades to get into a good enough college, but I didn't try or care beyond that. Accordingly, I reasoned that I should get no accolades or acknowledgement for something I put like 25% effort to and didn't care about. I imagine there are similar individuals like me who coasted through high school with little care or effort, and therefore their graduations deserve little to no acknowledgement as well. Finally, if it helps provide further clarification, I did think my college and law school graduations were noteworthy and worth celebrating because I did give substantial effort to both.

 

[General Malaise]

Graduation signs started here in 2020 when COVID shut down in person graduations and parents were being robbed of watching their child graduate.

at the notion that the average passerby would care at all that some kid graduated high school.

I get that graduation is for the parents,* but a yard sign is so dumb.

*The biggest fight I ever got in with my mom was when she forced me to miss a significant baseball game for my high school graduation. I still now wish I went to that baseball game (we beat a rival team and I really wish I could have been there), but as a parent I now understand my mom's position. My argument, nonetheless, is that high school graduation simply isn't a notable accomplishment for children without learning disabilities. Now, this analysis changes if the student is, say, valedictorian or some such, but if one just passes by showing up and providing minimal effort (like I did) it's not an accomplishment to be celebrated IMO. It is, however, a "life event" so I can understand attending if there simply is nothing better to do.

You might feel differently when the time comes for your kids to graduate HS.

Wouldn't be the first time I've had my mind changed on something through life experience.

To be clear, my position rests mostly on a critique of myself. By this I mean I barely tried in high school. I showed up, did enough to get good enough grades to get into a good enough college, but I didn't try or care beyond that. Accordingly, I reasoned that I should get no accolades or acknowledge for something I have like 25% effort to and didn't care about. I imagine there are similar individuals like me who coasted through high school with little care or effort, and therefore their graduations deserve little to no acknowledge as well. Finally, if it helps provide further clarify, I did think my college and law school graduations were noteworthy and worth celebrating because I did give substantial effort to both.

As my wife likes to remind me on a very regular basis - "It isn't all about you (me)".

I don't disagree with anything you wrote as it pertains to your past. Graduating HS wasn't exactly summiting Everest for me either. Nor do I think my older boys that are in college now struggled to get a HS diploma. BUT - I'm still really really proud of them for getting through it and getting into college. I'm proud of their accomplishments when they were in HS - theater, sports, grades, leadership, scholarships, groups all of it. And maybe there's a part of me that wants to express how proud I am with a silly yard sign with their picture that says "congrats, lil GM 1 & 2". To me, it was a small, inexpensive way to celebrate all their achievements up to and including HS graduation.

And no, we didn't put bumper stickers on our cars or announce that my son got a 5 on an AP test. We didn't have signs out for making the varsity football team or securing a full ride to Oregon for academics. I'll just not so humbly brag about it in here.

But I'll say it again, those $35 yard signs brought me so much joy every time I saw them. And maybe, you'll feel the same way when your wife makes you put them out front too in 10-15 years.

 

[belljr]

Graduation signs started here in 2020 when COVID shut down in person graduations and parents were being robbed of watching their child graduate.

at the notion that the average passerby would care at all that some kid graduated high school.

I get that graduation is for the parents,* but a yard sign is so dumb.

*The biggest fight I ever got in with my mom was when she forced me to miss a significant baseball game for my high school graduation. I still now wish I went to that baseball game (we beat a rival team and I really wish I could have been there), but as a parent I now understand my mom's position. My argument, nonetheless, is that high school graduation simply isn't a notable accomplishment for children without learning disabilities. Now, this analysis changes if the student is, say, valedictorian or some such, but if one just passes by showing up and providing minimal effort (like I did) it's not an accomplishment to be celebrated IMO. It is, however, a "life event" so I can understand attending if there simply is nothing better to do.

You might feel differently when the time comes for your kids to graduate HS.

Wouldn't be the first time I've had my mind changed on something through life experience.

To be clear, my position rests mostly on a critique of myself. By this I mean I barely tried in high school. I showed up, did enough to get good enough grades to get into a good enough college, but I didn't try or care beyond that. Accordingly, I reasoned that I should get no accolades or acknowledge for something I have like 25% effort to and didn't care about. I imagine there are similar individuals like me who coasted through high school with little care or effort, and therefore their graduations deserve little to no acknowledge as well. Finally, if it helps provide further clarify, I did think my college and law school graduations were noteworthy and worth celebrating because I did give substantial effort to both.

As my wife likes to remind me on a very regular basis - "It isn't all about you (me)".

I don't disagree with anything you wrote as it pertains to your past. Graduating HS wasn't exactly summiting Everest for me either. Nor do I think my older boys that are in college now struggled to get a HS diploma. BUT - I'm still really really proud of them for getting through it and getting into college. I'm proud of their accomplishments when they were in HS - theater, sports, grades, leadership, scholarships, groups all of it. And maybe there's a part of me that wants to express how proud I am with a silly yard sign with their picture that says "congrats, lil GM 1 & 2". To me, it was a small, inexpensive way to celebrate all their achievements up to and including HS graduation.

And no, we didn't put bumper stickers on our cars or announce that my son got a 5 on an AP test. We didn't have signs out for making the varsity football team or securing a full ride to Oregon for academics. I'll just not so humbly brag about it in here.

But I'll say it again, those $35 yard signs brought me so much joy every time I saw them. And maybe, you'll feel the same way when your wife makes you put them out front too in 10-15 years.

Wha-pssh

In all seriousness, I hope you reuse the signs, that has to be like a $3500 savings for you

 

[General Malaise]

Graduation signs started here in 2020 when COVID shut down in person graduations and parents were being robbed of watching their child graduate.

at the notion that the average passerby would care at all that some kid graduated high school.

I get that graduation is for the parents,* but a yard sign is so dumb.

*The biggest fight I ever got in with my mom was when she forced me to miss a significant baseball game for my high school graduation. I still now wish I went to that baseball game (we beat a rival team and I really wish I could have been there), but as a parent I now understand my mom's position. My argument, nonetheless, is that high school graduation simply isn't a notable accomplishment for children without learning disabilities. Now, this analysis changes if the student is, say, valedictorian or some such, but if one just passes by showing up and providing minimal effort (like I did) it's not an accomplishment to be celebrated IMO. It is, however, a "life event" so I can understand attending if there simply is nothing better to do.

You might feel differently when the time comes for your kids to graduate HS.

Wouldn't be the first time I've had my mind changed on something through life experience.

To be clear, my position rests mostly on a critique of myself. By this I mean I barely tried in high school. I showed up, did enough to get good enough grades to get into a good enough college, but I didn't try or care beyond that. Accordingly, I reasoned that I should get no accolades or acknowledge for something I have like 25% effort to and didn't care about. I imagine there are similar individuals like me who coasted through high school with little care or effort, and therefore their graduations deserve little to no acknowledge as well. Finally, if it helps provide further clarify, I did think my college and law school graduations were noteworthy and worth celebrating because I did give substantial effort to both.

As my wife likes to remind me on a very regular basis - "It isn't all about you (me)".

I don't disagree with anything you wrote as it pertains to your past. Graduating HS wasn't exactly summiting Everest for me either. Nor do I think my older boys that are in college now struggled to get a HS diploma. BUT - I'm still really really proud of them for getting through it and getting into college. I'm proud of their accomplishments when they were in HS - theater, sports, grades, leadership, scholarships, groups all of it. And maybe there's a part of me that wants to express how proud I am with a silly yard sign with their picture that says "congrats, lil GM 1 & 2". To me, it was a small, inexpensive way to celebrate all their achievements up to and including HS graduation.

And no, we didn't put bumper stickers on our cars or announce that my son got a 5 on an AP test. We didn't have signs out for making the varsity football team or securing a full ride to Oregon for academics. I'll just not so humbly brag about it in here.

But I'll say it again, those $35 yard signs brought me so much joy every time I saw them. And maybe, you'll feel the same way when your wife makes you put them out front too in 10-15 years.

Wha-pssh

In all seriousness, I hope you reuse the signs, that has to be like a $3500 savings for you

I still have them in the garage.....

 

[ChiefD]

I still have them in the garage.....

I have a bunch of signs like that I save. The kids signs, garage sale signs, etc.....

I save them and use them for the election season when all the politicians have their effing signs right near the polling place where I vote. It's at the library in my neighborhood.

I'll make a sign and stick it right front and center. At the last presidential election it said:

Patrick Mahomes
For President

This year it was:

Beer - Something
We All Agree On

 

[Tom Servo]

People scaled up from the "Christmas letters", the one where it's unsolicited and you get a short one sentence holiday greeting, then a print out with a ham fisted photo of their entire family and a point by point update on what's "Been Going On With Family X" for the last year.

I usually draw penises all over those before returning to sender. Then if they ask me about, I just play dumb pretending like I have no idea what happened.

I'm a lot older than everyone here, so many of you were either not born or too young to understand what happened in the 80s. There was a period in the 80s where kidnappers would go to a school and tell a kid that they were sent by their parents to pick them up, because their parents couldn't get there themselves. And that they were a friend of their parents or a coworker of their parents. Or they would tell them that their parents got into a car accident and they were sent to take the kid to the hospital.

Dennis Lehane did not just magically conjure up the core premise of Mystic River out of nowhere.

There was some social engineering at work in some cases. Some of the predators deep scouted the areas around and after school time. Watched which kids got picked up and by whom. Then likely worked the angle to see what info they could get. (i.e. if the kid was picked up in a pickup truck full of landscaping tools in the back) One situation I remember hearing about, someone tried to lure a little girl into a van by offering a Jordache purse.

It was enough of a problem back then that mainstream family oriented TV shows started covering some aspects of the issue. Diff'rent Strokes, The Facts Of Life, etc, etc.

Many people here have never traveled outside of the "Western World" Those who have extensively, like myself, are generally more cautious about what happens around their family and children. There is a level of chaos and suffering that I would wager the majority here just don't understand that happens on a routine basis for children just about everywhere else. Many people here have no idea how fortunate they are to be born into freedom and abundance relative to the rest of the world. Many people here are just plain ungrateful if you observe them over time.

Humility is a survival adaptation with the reality of "load sharing" regarding work output for basic necessities in group/community formats. In a society with abundance, arrogance is tolerated. But most don't understand that turning up your nose again and again at others in public is a fast and easy way to die all across recorded human history.

Parents who have their young children kidnapped live in a constant state of self torture. They revisit all of their choices, asking themselves if they had just done something differently, just one small thing, then maybe their child would still be there in front of them. Anyone here want that to be you? For those who want to roll that kind of loaded set of dice, go on, blather all your children's private information out into the world.

Make no mistake - There predators out there who will snatch children, make a film out of them, cut the throats of those kids and then will go cook themselves dinner and sleep soundly at night.

Never be arrogant about your children. Life has a way of punishing those that do.

GG making it dank. On brand.

 

[Leroy Hoard]

GG making it dank. On brand

They closed down his forum that allowed such decorum.

 

[Capella]

If you can put a yard sign up about some politician who hates you, you damn sure can put one up to support your kid.

I think these signs are dumb but it’s also very dumb to care about anybody putting them up.

 

[General Malaise]

If you can put a yard sign up about some politician who hates you, you damn sure can put one up to support your kid.

I think these signs are dumb but it’s also very dumb to care about anybody putting them up.

You're gonna enjoy the look on your son's face when you plant one in your front yard in 2035 and his buddies come over and tease him. Extra special when his GF pulls up in her car and says "awwwwwwww, look how cute that is!!!"

$35 of pure joy.

 

[-OZ-]

P.S. I think it’s really all just a money-making scam that preys on parents’ inclination to want to brag about their kids.

Without a doubt someone is making cash off of this. Originally the signs were home-made but now they are professionally printed

Yep. My wife makes our signs for “graduating” each school. The materials cost money but nowhere near the price of the professional/fundraising ones the district sells.
I don’t care for them until HS grad, but I’m not fighting it.

 

[-OZ-]

Parents who are proud of their kids are so cringe

Yeah, those ****ers suck.

 

[Capella]

If you can put a yard sign up about some politician who hates you, you damn sure can put one up to support your kid.

I think these signs are dumb but it’s also very dumb to care about anybody putting them up.

You're gonna enjoy the look on your son's face when you plant one in your front yard in 2035 and his buddies come over and tease him. Extra special when his GF pulls up in her car and says "awwwwwwww, look how cute that is!!!"

$35 of pure joy.

Listen if the idiotic state I live in hasn’t separated into the ocean due to our big-weekly hurricanes by 2035 I’ll fill my front yard with signs of your accomplishments.

 

[pollardsvision]

Explained to my wife privately "you realize we're basically advertising an elementary school kid lives here, right?".

All of the bikes and toys in my yard would tell you that too. No need for a sign.

I used to sell educational books door to door. Yeah, a sign is not necessary.

Vehicles and condition of the yard are good indicators too.

Although that was 20 years ago so vehicles may not mean much anymore. Now everybody either drives an extended cab truck or a crossover SUV no matter the age or stage of life.