Seriously?Just a question how does a person even know where to get heroin? How do you go from pain killers to heroin without help?
#### you. Guy says he struggling with addiction and you'd ask him that? #######.Do you ask fat chicks on diets to describe what a banana split tastes like?Describe the high.
You're asking me to take Finless seriously. See the problem with that?#### you. Guy says he struggling with addiction and you'd ask him that? #######.Do you ask fat chicks on diets to describe what a banana split tastes like?Describe the high.
My buddy went through the same thing with Oxi after a few knee operations. Started out with vicodin. upgraded to oxi and was going to 2-3 doctors to get oxi, he was so desperate that he changed a script from 20 to 200. The pharamacist called his doctor because he knew that they don`t write Oxi for 200.My friend could take a couple oxi every few hours while drinking vodka on the rocks. After he pulled the script stunt he was going to end up in court or go to re-hab..he choose rehab. That was 5 years ago..now he still drinks but is totally off the drugs. It was tough but you have to get off that stuff. good luck..NAh its for real and most of my posts here have been real. Yes, I have a good job and put away a good chunk of change wich allowed me to have a expensive girlfriend and an expensive drug habit. Money is running out and I just got a great job offer from a good friend down in Houston. Gotta clean up so I can be effective. I;ve actually kicked 3 times since January and went back. I can't keep doing it and I can't go through it that many more times. My body can't take it. Losing 2o0 lbs in 2 weeks is not easy nor good for the body. I'm just looking forward to getting my life back and helping other like I used to.
'Mr. Ham said:#### you. Guy says he struggling with addiction and you'd ask him that? #######.Do you ask fat chicks on diets to describe what a banana split tastes like?'Arizona Ron said:Describe the high.
'Finless said:I've got an hour or two to kill. Feel free to ask any questions.
The OP said "I've got an hour or two to kill. Feel free to ask any questions." Doesn't that sound like a man who has hit rock bottom? I'm a recovered junkie, and I am very skeptical about this. Good luck to the OP on improving himself whether he is telling the truth or not.'Mr. Ham said:#### you. Guy says he struggling with addiction and you'd ask him that? #######.Do you ask fat chicks on diets to describe what a banana split tastes like?'Arizona Ron said:Describe the high.
Come on bro...you can do it.Good luck.'Finless said:NAh its for real and most of my posts here have been real. Yes, I have a good job and put away a good chunk of change wich allowed me to have a expensive girlfriend and an expensive drug habit. Money is running out and I just got a great job offer from a good friend down in Houston. Gotta clean up so I can be effective. I;ve actually kicked 3 times since January and went back. I can't keep doing it and I can't go through it that many more times. My body can't take it. Losing 2o0 lbs in 2 weeks is not easy nor good for the body. I'm just looking forward to getting my life back and helping other like I used to.
Describe what its like being mentally unstable.'Mr. Ham said:#### you. Guy says he struggling with addiction and you'd ask him that? #######.Do you ask fat chicks on diets to describe what a banana split tastes like?'Arizona Ron said:Describe the high.
people hooked on oxy move to heroin when the oxy becomes too much $$$'Two Deep said:Just a question how does a person even know where to get heroin? How do you go from pain killers to heroin without help?
Thank you for this pissah, I'm digesting. Did you 12 step?'wikkidpissah said:You have to fill your heart first and your life second. I beat 12 yrs addicted coke, then meth (last 2 yrs) without rehab or 12-step so i may not be the right reference point, but there might be 1 or 2 things i know from that process which maybe the squares dont.It's all about death & noise, man. "Up" highs are about beating death and creating enough noise to drown out the s***, "down" highs are about inviting death and quieting the noise from all the s***. Combine both in high dosages and you got condos in heaven & hell, so #### em. The s*** nor the noise don't actually stop and, once you become friends with death, he keeps patting the seat next to him & smiling at you for the rest of your days.God is the answer we've invented for death & that's why most of the cures are God-based. It works but, at its heart, it's more noise. The answer for those who have not God is beauty and it is that to which i turned to save myself. My wife's death of cancer was all wrapped up in my personal crash, so i had to get away from the town that reminded of her. Borrowed my uncle's hunting cabin in Vt for a winter, used the seclusion to beat the physical part. I may be wrong, but i think you have to do the God/program thing if you want to cure the drugs without quitting your life. So quit your life if it dont hurt nobody but you.I cured myself with two sentences: 1) Happiness begins where selfishness ends 2) For us each, there is a beauty only we can serve. The first one is simple - the less you require from outside yourself, the more you require from inside yourself. The first thing you have to require from yourself is truth - you aint trickin nobody but you and all that does is rob your ability to reward yourself with the benefits of what is real and tactile and just plain beautiful. The opportunity to be me today is an extraordinary gift and drugs are for people who cant find the way to appreciating that. How stupid, right?! The second one is actually the way built into life to celebrate realization of the first. There is indeed a beauty only you can serve - whether its an art, a craft (there's an old Jewish wisdom that even the greatest thinker should learn how to make something by hand, so they can stay in touch with the basics and always know they can provide) or something on a non-creative plain that you can treat as an art - even loving your wife or raising kids or giving to the less fortunate or even raising something that is insignificant to everybody else to a status of great significance with yourself. As long as you treat it like an art, it is an art. And art is a prayer, whether there's a God or not. It's beautiful and makes you beautiful. And only tall blondes need drugs when theyre beautiful - that's only cuz they dont get to see the beauty we do. Good luck to you both - i'm a PM away if you need it.'Smack Tripper said:Don't know if this is the place, but I appreciate your thoughts here pissah. I feel for finless because I'm battling some addiction right now myself. Been thinking about a thread for a while and I'm not sure where I"m at with things right now. The lying to yourself is a hard thing as much as anything, but the big thing I'm paying the bill for is transference. I can't speak for Finless or you, but what I battle myself is addiction basically became an attempt to fill holes in myself with my compulsions. The trouble is, it is a bit of a whack a mole in that you do tend to trade addictions. At my "best" I know I'm a workaholic and probably a sex addict, but there are positive channeling for those, or at least more societially normal. Did you find a more positive, or at least a more acceptable outlet for your addiction? I'm probably where Finless was 2 weeks ago, something needs to be done and I need some help to do it, but this is kind of something freaking me out, once you commit, whats on the other side and what will take your time then.'wikkidpissah said:GL, Finless.Beat coke/meth myself - more than a decade free & clear. It's worth the trouble. Once your body gets free, work on the lies next. Hiding, outwitting life is half of the psychic portion of addiction, esp. for a clever person. If you gotta switch one dependence for another, make the 2nd one truth. Again, my best wishes.
It's more euphoric mentally, with all of the same fantastic physical sensations.i know what 40mg of hydrocodone feels like. i can't even imagine what oxy is like.
bags of sand, man'Arizona Ron said:Describe the high.
constipation was the main physical sensation for me.It's more euphoric mentally, with all of the same fantastic physical sensations.i know what 40mg of hydrocodone feels like. i can't even imagine what oxy is like.
oxycodone is 1.5x stronger than hydrocodone, so that should give you an idea.i know what 40mg of hydrocodone feels like. i can't even imagine what oxy is like.
It is a heck of a lot stronger than that. Synthetic heroin is really the only way to describe it.oxycodone is 1.5x stronger than hydrocodone, so that should give you an idea.i know what 40mg of hydrocodone feels like. i can't even imagine what oxy is like.
a pit bullbest of luck in getting clean, man. it may sound dumb, but once you get out of rehab, I would suggest you get a puppy or something similar which requires that you stay clean in order to take care of it.
Most decent sized communities have a methadone clinic. This is where junkies go to get a free dose of opiates from the government. They call it maintenance or treatment, but those junkies get a serious buzz from the stuff and generally work to get the doc to increase their dose. Some of them earn enough trust to take home a week's supply at a time. This gets abused in a wide variety of ways. The clinics all operate on a schedule. Usually they open around 7am to dose people before they go to work and close around lunch for the stragglers who sleep in. So, if you want to score heroin, find the clinic in the yellow pages and sit in the clinic parking lot right before it closes. Every single day junkies will show up late, pissed that they missed their dose and the only way for them to stay well is to score. Just say hi to the cutest one. They're usually very accommodating if you can help with a few bucks. Man, I really despise junkies. I frackin' married one who convinced me she'd been clean for years. Liar. I used to pity the few I knew and wanted to save them. I have helped a couple hard cores kick, meaning I was there 24/7 for the withdrawals, including the ex who just paroled last winter after 7 long years in opiate providing care of the state of Nevada. Wow does kicking suck. freaky how someone will go through all that horror to get clean and just backslide into the gutter over some dumb excuse. Junkies are chronic habitual liars and thieves. I don't believe anything they say which makes a thread like this a conundrum. If Finless is fishing he is more honest than if he isn't. Seriously. Good luck dude. I'd like to subscribe to your newsletter. Please chronicle the Rehab experience with pictures and stories. Thanks.'Two Deep said:Just a question how does a person even know where to get heroin? How do you go from pain killers to heroin without help?
My ex did this. Spent $1400 on a Sharp Pei (if you believe that's what she did with my money). Few months later she gave the dog away to a better home (if that's what you want to believe).a pit bullbest of luck in getting clean, man. it may sound dumb, but once you get out of rehab, I would suggest you get a puppy or something similar which requires that you stay clean in order to take care of it.
Not really. It takes balls to face life head on without chemical help though.GL Fin. Takes balls to admit a problem.
'Arizona Ron said:You're asking me to take Finless seriously. See the problem with that?'Mr. Ham said:#### you. Guy says he struggling with addiction and you'd ask him that? #######.Do you ask fat chicks on diets to describe what a banana split tastes like?'Arizona Ron said:Describe the high.
I don't really know you Fin, but good luck. It's going to be a "rest of your life" type journey, so best wishes.
I'm still somewhat :shuked: by this whole addiction concept. What exactly qualifies as a legit sex addiction? A willingness to sleep with a slew of super fat chicks? Porn constantly streaming? Guess it goes to the root defintition of "addiction" but, unlike a physical dependency to chemicals as an easily understood addiction, things like sex, gambling, and shopping addictions, for examples, confuse me.'Smack Tripper said:Don't know if this is the place, but I appreciate your thoughts here pissah. I feel for finless because I'm battling some addiction right now myself. Been thinking about a thread for a while and I'm not sure where I"m at with things right now. The lying to yourself is a hard thing as much as anything, but the big thing I'm paying the bill for is transference. I can't speak for Finless or you, but what I battle myself is addiction basically became an attempt to fill holes in myself with my compulsions. The trouble is, it is a bit of a whack a mole in that you do tend to trade addictions. At my "best" I know I'm a workaholic and probably a sex addict, but there are positive channeling for those, or at least more societially normal. Did you find a more positive, or at least a more acceptable outlet for your addiction? I'm probably where Finless was 2 weeks ago, something needs to be done and I need some help to do it, but this is kind of something freaking me out, once you commit, whats on the other side and what will take your time then.'wikkidpissah said:GL, Finless.
Beat coke/meth myself - more than a decade free & clear. It's worth the trouble. Once your body gets free, work on the lies next. Hiding, outwitting life is half of the psychic portion of addiction, esp. for a clever person. If you gotta switch one dependence for another, make the 2nd one truth. Again, my best wishes.
It's a harmful activity. You keep participating in that activity. You try to stop, but can't.That probably sums up "addiction".What exactly qualifies as a legit sex addiction?
Anything that causes your dopamine levels to spike can become addictive if you have an addictive personality and there is a trigger event that getd you started. Shopping, eating, screwing, whatever gives you pleasure. It isn't much different than physical addiction for the sufferer. Kicking is less violent physical but can certainly be as trying on every other level.I'm still somewhat :shuked: by this whole addiction concept. What exactly qualifies as a legit sex addiction? A willingness to sleep with a slew of super fat chicks? Porn constantly streaming? Guess it goes to the root defintition of "addiction" but, unlike a physical dependency to chemicals as an easily understood addiction, things like sex, gambling, and shopping addictions, for examples, confuse me.'Smack Tripper said:Don't know if this is the place, but I appreciate your thoughts here pissah. I feel for finless because I'm battling some addiction right now myself. Been thinking about a thread for a while and I'm not sure where I"m at with things right now. The lying to yourself is a hard thing as much as anything, but the big thing I'm paying the bill for is transference. I can't speak for Finless or you, but what I battle myself is addiction basically became an attempt to fill holes in myself with my compulsions. The trouble is, it is a bit of a whack a mole in that you do tend to trade addictions. At my "best" I know I'm a workaholic and probably a sex addict, but there are positive channeling for those, or at least more societially normal. Did you find a more positive, or at least a more acceptable outlet for your addiction? I'm probably where Finless was 2 weeks ago, something needs to be done and I need some help to do it, but this is kind of something freaking me out, once you commit, whats on the other side and what will take your time then.'wikkidpissah said:GL, Finless.
Beat coke/meth myself - more than a decade free & clear. It's worth the trouble. Once your body gets free, work on the lies next. Hiding, outwitting life is half of the psychic portion of addiction, esp. for a clever person. If you gotta switch one dependence for another, make the 2nd one truth. Again, my best wishes.
Makes pretty good sense, thanks.Anything that causes your dopamine levels to spike can become addictive if you have an addictive personality and there is a trigger event that getd you started. Shopping, eating, screwing, whatever gives you pleasure. It isn't much different than physical addiction for the sufferer. Kicking is less violent physical but can certainly be as trying on every other level.I'm still somewhat :shuked: by this whole addiction concept. What exactly qualifies as a legit sex addiction? A willingness to sleep with a slew of super fat chicks? Porn constantly streaming? Guess it goes to the root defintition of "addiction" but, unlike a physical dependency to chemicals as an easily understood addiction, things like sex, gambling, and shopping addictions, for examples, confuse me.'Smack Tripper said:Don't know if this is the place, but I appreciate your thoughts here pissah. I feel for finless because I'm battling some addiction right now myself. Been thinking about a thread for a while and I'm not sure where I"m at with things right now. The lying to yourself is a hard thing as much as anything, but the big thing I'm paying the bill for is transference. I can't speak for Finless or you, but what I battle myself is addiction basically became an attempt to fill holes in myself with my compulsions. The trouble is, it is a bit of a whack a mole in that you do tend to trade addictions. At my "best" I know I'm a workaholic and probably a sex addict, but there are positive channeling for those, or at least more societially normal. Did you find a more positive, or at least a more acceptable outlet for your addiction? I'm probably where Finless was 2 weeks ago, something needs to be done and I need some help to do it, but this is kind of something freaking me out, once you commit, whats on the other side and what will take your time then.'wikkidpissah said:GL, Finless.
Beat coke/meth myself - more than a decade free & clear. It's worth the trouble. Once your body gets free, work on the lies next. Hiding, outwitting life is half of the psychic portion of addiction, esp. for a clever person. If you gotta switch one dependence for another, make the 2nd one truth. Again, my best wishes.
I'm not sensitive about this stuff honestly. I kicked back in 99-00. Stayed sober for 10 years. The H out here is nothing like it is in NYC. You get an unbelievable rush from the east coast stuff. This stuff just produces pins and needles but not much else. I actually began by going to a place in town where there were clearly junkies hanging around. Ended up with a delivery service that comes right to my house daily.It's really crazy how you can hide with this stuff. My best friends, girlfriend I have sex with daily and my boss/best friend have been clueless. So honesty don't tread carefully with the questions. I've got thick skin as long as you're not just being a #### for no reason. I have no patience for that.Our company was being featured in a big magazine today and I slept through the photo shoot. I feel like a complete loser. Let my buddy down. My ex girlfriend just called me to go to the mall with her after work and then for a walk. I told her I was feeling depressed because I missed the shoot. She said go to the park and lay in the sun and talk with your buddy. I said who? She said God silly. I may do that. I have track marks on my arms that are best covered with a tan. I carry around a stick of cover up for appointments and such. It's been crazy.No this is not a pure shtick account. It's barely a shtick ac####. I'm just different breed. Hopefully I make it out of this alive. Months ago I shared my issue with a couple fbgs. I sent some rather graphic photos.'Arizona Ron said:You're asking me to take Finless seriously. See the problem with that?'Mr. Ham said:#### you. Guy says he struggling with addiction and you'd ask him that? #######.Do you ask fat chicks on diets to describe what a banana split tastes like?'Arizona Ron said:Describe the high.
I lived in VT during Phish's heyday. I knew Trey. I would sell him opiates from 1995-1998.Trey made it through, so can you.
The Squirming Coil of sunset
I keep within my reach
Tried yesterday to get away
and hitchhiked to the beach
I saw Satan on the beach
trying to catch a ray
He wasn't quite the speed of light
and the squirming coil
it got away....
Since you asked me Zow, and I do agree with Commish's breakdown and I relate very much to it. To me, an addiciton is something that disrupts the balance and harmony of your life. Too much of anything, even a good thing, is just that, too much. Sex addiction is tricky, and I guess like anything, the simplest test is, does it get in the way of your day to day life? Does it adversely impact you, be it professionally, family wise or financially?Makes pretty good sense, thanks.Anything that causes your dopamine levels to spike can become addictive if you have an addictive personality and there is a trigger event that getd you started. Shopping, eating, screwing, whatever gives you pleasure. It isn't much different than physical addiction for the sufferer. Kicking is less violent physical but can certainly be as trying on every other level.I'm still somewhat :shuked: by this whole addiction concept. What exactly qualifies as a legit sex addiction? A willingness to sleep with a slew of super fat chicks? Porn constantly streaming? Guess it goes to the root defintition of "addiction" but, unlike a physical dependency to chemicals as an easily understood addiction, things like sex, gambling, and shopping addictions, for examples, confuse me.'Smack Tripper said:Don't know if this is the place, but I appreciate your thoughts here pissah. I feel for finless because I'm battling some addiction right now myself. Been thinking about a thread for a while and I'm not sure where I"m at with things right now. The lying to yourself is a hard thing as much as anything, but the big thing I'm paying the bill for is transference. I can't speak for Finless or you, but what I battle myself is addiction basically became an attempt to fill holes in myself with my compulsions. The trouble is, it is a bit of a whack a mole in that you do tend to trade addictions. At my "best" I know I'm a workaholic and probably a sex addict, but there are positive channeling for those, or at least more societially normal. Did you find a more positive, or at least a more acceptable outlet for your addiction? I'm probably where Finless was 2 weeks ago, something needs to be done and I need some help to do it, but this is kind of something freaking me out, once you commit, whats on the other side and what will take your time then.'wikkidpissah said:GL, Finless.
Beat coke/meth myself - more than a decade free & clear. It's worth the trouble. Once your body gets free, work on the lies next. Hiding, outwitting life is half of the psychic portion of addiction, esp. for a clever person. If you gotta switch one dependence for another, make the 2nd one truth. Again, my best wishes.