Rehab - About to check myself in (1 Viewer)

[Clifford]

.

 

[tommyboy]

so what did happen?

 

[Aaron Rudnicki]

so what did happen?

we don't know.

per the comments on his facebook page, he passed away rather suddenly.

he has posted of his battles with addiction here, so most assume he died of an overdose.

 

[seahawk 17]

RIP, I remember him really messed up over his buddies death, and afraid he would go out the same way.

 

[Zow]

Damn

 

[Quez]

RIP Finless.

 

[tommyboy]

Dont even know the guy and makes me want to cry. Exhibit #19768 why not to do drugs.

 

[Das Boot]

What is it exactly that you're saying? I'm confused. Are you thinking I'm just bored making this all up? I can link some photographic evidence if you think I owe it to the board since I've been allegedly fishing it with lies for a decade. This story is true. Anytime I make a post that is beyond a paragraph it's legit. As Nigel pointed out, its fairly easy to differentiate the joke thread from the real. Me buying a segway was clearly a joke thread. It's not even fishing. It's just something I think is funny. I have never started a thread about a situation in my life with the intent of fishing people here. I have no need for that. Go ahead and do a search on threads started by me. You tell me where I'm making up a story about myself to fish the board because I have nothing better to do. I'm a different kind of cat. I've lived a colorful life. Lots of ups and downs. Success and failure. I've been homeless before. I have slept in shelters. I have eaten in soup kitchens. I've been stabbed, shot. And I've also had a lot of really cool things happen in my life as well. I came to the conclusion last night while talking with a very close friend, a girl I regretfully dated, that I am addicted to self destruction. I fall for women who are bad for me. I was addicted to gambling, opiates. What I was getting at was that I don't even know if I classify myself as an addict. I feel like there is something inside of me that draws me to things that will eventually kill me.

By the sounds of it, you aint even close to a place where rehab is gonna do you any good. You still have waaaay to much of your ego ideal wrapped up in being a drug "player" to make the necessary change. Saving yourself is an act of humility, not of heroism. Save your money - matter of fact, gimme half.

This is a tough one, bro. Fin keeps setting off my BS detector then resetting it.

Not sure what u mean, here, Chaos. All i'm saying is that, unless and until Fin reaches a level of humility that at least matches his circumstances, he would be wasting whatever chance at a cure which rehab might offer. Still way wrapped up in the minutia of where he's at & not the maxutia - i know that play and its a sick play, an inner game destined to beat him.

Pal, I have gone through this before a decade ago. I know I need help, now. If not I'm going to die. By nature I'm confident, maybe a bit cocky. But I know when I'm beat. I am powerless of this. I can't do it alone. I kicked thrice in the last 5 months. I went through hell; shaking, cold sweats, unbearable stomach cramps, no sleep, projectile vomiting anything that went inside of me. Not to mention the mental aspect. Reliving my life. Thinking of all the mistakes I made. The bad choices. The people I hurt. The people who didn't make it and aren't with us anymore. I sat in the sun of the southwest in the high desert too sick to move. Too sick to make a phone call. Too sick to smoke a cigarette. I fasted for a week sustaining on just liquids. I did the same thing a decade ago. Detox, halfway house, three quarter house. Then I went out on my own and maintained my sobriety for 10 years. During that span I helped a lot of men out. I reached out to the sick in the streets. I brought men into me home and sat with them and talked. Took them through the 12 steps. Watched them grow, gain confidence, become employable, get married, have children. I did my work. I know about humility. You can go ahead and take a paragraph or all of my postings here and judge me and tell me "I'm not ready". I have been embarrassed of myself lately. Where I let myself get to. I was almost evicted last week. I have sold belongings of mine. There's one thing I know. I'm about to go through living hell again for the 4th time this year and this time I'm not coming home until I have some clarity. There is no next time. I'm lucky to be typing right now. I know this.

Just a couple of replies in this thread that particularly struck me after rereading it.

I can't imagine the pain of drug addiction. :(

 

[Rohn Jambo]

Tony B. did an episode on heroin in Finless's home state.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=snRFr9gspVc

 

[Bonfire]

RIP buddy

Would like to hope maybe this is a warning story that might help a fbg avoid this path.

 

[Quez]

I went through hell; shaking, cold sweats, unbearable stomach cramps, no sleep, projectile vomiting anything that went inside of me. Not to mention the mental aspect. Reliving my life. Thinking of all the mistakes I made. The bad choices. The people I hurt. The people who didn't make it and aren't with us anymore.

I wasn't aware of the mental aspect of detox until I read this. It sounds liklike the mental pain for someone detoxing is just as bad as the physical part. I could only imagine the enormous guilt of relapsing, screwing people over, etc. Weighed very heavily on Chris's shoulders. I'm glad he is finally at peace.

 

[Sabertooth]

Not sure why but I had finless on ignore for years. I have to say he looked nothing like I though he would. I'm so glad nobody close to me battles addiction on that level. We have our share of drunk uncles in my family but they are at least functioning. Can't imagine the guilt any decent person would feel after screwing over loved ones for another fix.

 

[Soulfly3]

my best friend has the most addictive personality Ive ever seen or heard of. no matter what it is - food, drugs, electronics, spending etc.

the guy just has ZERO self control and does everything to an excess I have never witnessed. Since early childhood, he was obese, but only obsessed w music - which he still makes a career out of.

Once we hit highschool, he went from cogs, to pot, to shrooms and E, to coke, to mountains of coke. the guy was FAT and went down to a toothpick. eventually got help.

not too long ago, he got into the percs, then oxys, to the point he was smashing anywhere from 80-120mg a day, easy (the he ADMITS TO.. meaning it's prob way more). Not a joke. again, he's fat.

No idea how his body ever made it through this, but he went for help and seems to be off it.

one of the greatest guys around - will give u the shirt off his back, but cant control his appetite for anything. im convinced some ppl just cannot help it. it's wired in their brains.

at least my friend is alive, though Im surprised. i hope it stays that way. best wishes for finless and whatever the afterlife may/may not have in store. at least he's resting easy

 

[jon_mx]

Not sure why but I had finless on ignore for years. I have to say he looked nothing like I though he would. I'm so glad nobody close to me battles addiction on that level. We have our share of drunk uncles in my family but they are at least functioning. Can't imagine the guilt any decent person would feel after screwing over loved ones for another fix.

Many people got tired of his fishing trips, so I am guessing that was it. Some of them were not fishing trips though.