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Serious Advise Needed - To Dog Again? (1 Viewer)

Uh, this sounds like it's about a lot more than the dog (but the dog being a big part).

I think you might need to find someone to talk to...maybe?
don't make it more than it is..........it's just simply do you put yourself back out there again knowing what the inevitable answer will be?

and how's this for a sidebar: i just popped out for a moment and i got behind a car at a trafiic light with the license plate DOGRE$Q (NC Plate).......very bizarre.
You know, if only the universe could give you a sign then you might now what to do.

 
Uh, this sounds like it's about a lot more than the dog (but the dog being a big part).

I think you might need to find someone to talk to...maybe?
don't make it more than it is..........it's just simply do you put yourself back out there again knowing what the inevitable answer will be?
Well, just watch yourself.
if you want, we can move this to the suicide or depression threads........only if they are ***OFFICIAL***
I'm just saying we've already got the Shining Path's fantasy league around here and I don't need anyone else doing something that makes me have to commish another league. :hot:
 
while I understand that I am not omnipotent, like many people, death has sadly shaped my path. I do understand the inevitability of death and during my dog's last year I was kind of hoping I was prepared, as I kept reminding my wife that he was closer to the rainbow bridge than chasing a squirrel. I am in the position of having lost both parents, all grandparents, my MIL and having no relatives that I have spoken with in 25+ years. each time you lose something, imo it's a piece of you.

if anyone can have a last straw, i thought losing my MIL 15 years ago was mine. however, I think this may have been worse. simply because my standard answer to anything now is "i don't care". hence not knowing that I can put myself into a situation with an inevitable ending.
Not meant to compare in any way, but I've lost parents, grandparents, a sister, cousins, etc. So far I've had to deal with the deaths of 5 dogs. And it never gets easy. Most recent one was on Thanksgiving day. Hurt like hell. But I try to focus on the good times rather than the loss. It still hurts but I remember the joy and companionship she gave us and the fact that we gave her a chance when she was down to her last days (literally) at the shelter. Even though we still have 3 dogs we'll likely add another to the zoo. In the end it's your decision but getting another doesn't minimize the life and memories of your first dog in any way.

 
In regards to putting yourself out there again. Yeah it's hard. And yeah in the back of our minds we all know we are going to mourn again. But its what happens between now and then that keeps us going back for more. The uncomplicated love for and from our pets is worth the pain in the end. They don't care if you're rich or successful. They only care that you come home to them. Kind of a tough thing to find in our human relations some times.

 
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while I understand that I am not omnipotent, like many people, death has sadly shaped my path. I do understand the inevitability of death and during my dog's last year I was kind of hoping I was prepared, as I kept reminding my wife that he was closer to the rainbow bridge than chasing a squirrel. I am in the position of having lost both parents, all grandparents, my MIL and having no relatives that I have spoken with in 25+ years. each time you lose something, imo it's a piece of you.

if anyone can have a last straw, i thought losing my MIL 15 years ago was mine. however, I think this may have been worse. simply because my standard answer to anything now is "i don't care". hence not knowing that I can put myself into a situation with an inevitable ending.
Not meant to compare in any way, but I've lost parents, grandparents, a sister, cousins, etc. So far I've had to deal with the deaths of 5 dogs. And it never gets easy. Most recent one was on Thanksgiving day. Hurt like hell. But I try to focus on the good times rather than the loss. It still hurts but I remember the joy and companionship she gave us and the fact that we gave her a chance when she was down to her last days (literally) at the shelter. Even though we still have 3 dogs we'll likely add another to the zoo. In the end it's your decision but getting another doesn't minimize the life and memories of your first dog in any way.
This is the most important part IMO.

Lay down at night knowing you gave Jasper the best damn life he would have had otherwise.

My current rescue is getting old and after having one of the most horrific first parts of her life one could imagine, when I find myself getting depressed about her aging, I just try to remember - she is the luckiest damn dog on the planet and if she was going to have a life on earth, I know she got the best damn one.

I have always worked from home, and other than vacation, am rarely away from her. My long term GF also took to her like it was her own. She's the queen of the house with no attention spent elsewhere since we don't have children (or many friends ;) )

Anyway - try to remember that. Jasper could have had #### for life, but he had the best. That should keep you positive.

 
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while I understand that I am not omnipotent, like many people, death has sadly shaped my path. I do understand the inevitability of death and during my dog's last year I was kind of hoping I was prepared, as I kept reminding my wife that he was closer to the rainbow bridge than chasing a squirrel. I am in the position of having lost both parents, all grandparents, my MIL and having no relatives that I have spoken with in 25+ years. each time you lose something, imo it's a piece of you.

if anyone can have a last straw, i thought losing my MIL 15 years ago was mine. however, I think this may have been worse. simply because my standard answer to anything now is "i don't care". hence not knowing that I can put myself into a situation with an inevitable ending.
Not meant to compare in any way, but I've lost parents, grandparents, a sister, cousins, etc. So far I've had to deal with the deaths of 5 dogs. And it never gets easy. Most recent one was on Thanksgiving day. Hurt like hell. But I try to focus on the good times rather than the loss. It still hurts but I remember the joy and companionship she gave us and the fact that we gave her a chance when she was down to her last days (literally) at the shelter. Even though we still have 3 dogs we'll likely add another to the zoo. In the end it's your decision but getting another doesn't minimize the life and memories of your first dog in any way.
This is the most important part IMO.

Lay down at night knowing you gave Jasper the best damn life he would have had otherwise.

My current rescue is getting old and after having one of the most horrific first parts of her life one could imagine, when I find myself getting depressed about her aging, I just try to remember - she is the luckiest damn dog on the planet and if she was going to have a life on earth, I know she got the best damn one.

I have always worked from home, and other than vacation, am rarely away from her. My long term GF also took to her like it was her own. She's the queen of the house with no attention spent elsewhere since we don't have children (or many friends ;) )

Anyway - try to remember that. Jasper could have had #### for life, but he had the best. That should keep you positive.
appreciate the kind words.......he was a kill shelter rescue and i can't imagine his 1st year. that said, we always said to ourselves if dogs had a powerball lottery, our guy hit the 1.3billion.

truly, i think any shelter dog that gets rescued has won the lottery and why anyone would spend money on a dog is beyond me.................

from my conversations with my wife today, it seems as if she had already turned her launch key and has requested i do the same.

 
while I understand that I am not omnipotent, like many people, death has sadly shaped my path. I do understand the inevitability of death and during my dog's last year I was kind of hoping I was prepared, as I kept reminding my wife that he was closer to the rainbow bridge than chasing a squirrel. I am in the position of having lost both parents, all grandparents, my MIL and having no relatives that I have spoken with in 25+ years. each time you lose something, imo it's a piece of you.

if anyone can have a last straw, i thought losing my MIL 15 years ago was mine. however, I think this may have been worse. simply because my standard answer to anything now is "i don't care". hence not knowing that I can put myself into a situation with an inevitable ending.
Not meant to compare in any way, but I've lost parents, grandparents, a sister, cousins, etc. So far I've had to deal with the deaths of 5 dogs. And it never gets easy. Most recent one was on Thanksgiving day. Hurt like hell. But I try to focus on the good times rather than the loss. It still hurts but I remember the joy and companionship she gave us and the fact that we gave her a chance when she was down to her last days (literally) at the shelter. Even though we still have 3 dogs we'll likely add another to the zoo. In the end it's your decision but getting another doesn't minimize the life and memories of your first dog in any way.
This is the most important part IMO.Lay down at night knowing you gave Jasper the best damn life he would have had otherwise.

My current rescue is getting old and after having one of the most horrific first parts of her life one could imagine, when I find myself getting depressed about her aging, I just try to remember - she is the luckiest damn dog on the planet and if she was going to have a life on earth, I know she got the best damn one.

I have always worked from home, and other than vacation, am rarely away from her. My long term GF also took to her like it was her own. She's the queen of the house with no attention spent elsewhere since we don't have children (or many friends ;) )

Anyway - try to remember that. Jasper could have had #### for life, but he had the best. That should keep you positive.
appreciate the kind words.......he was a kill shelter rescue and i can't imagine his 1st year. that said, we always said to ourselves if dogs had a powerball lottery, our guy hit the 1.3billion.truly, i think any shelter dog that gets rescued has won the lottery and why anyone would spend money on a dog is beyond me.................

from my conversations with my wife today, it seems as if she had already turned her launch key and has requested i do the same.
Sounds like a keeper.

 
So sorry for your loss.

Grew up in a cat family. Had one when I was born, got another when it passed, and one more before I left home. Didn't really have a stable home as a young adult, so never really crossed my mind to adopt a pet.

Girlfriends apartment burns down, she moves in with me and brings her cat. Gets her own place which doesn't allow pets, cat #1.

Get married, wife wants a dog, get a beautiful, sweet, dumb retriever.

Find a litter of kittens on an investment property, adopt out 3, wife wants to keep 2, cats #2, #3.

Get divorced, wife takes dog.

Marriage #2, wife has cat #4. Have child, now 13. Feed neighborhood cat who is picked up by animal control, set for euthanization. Agree to bring it in, cat #5.

Wife finds puppy in dumpster at work, mom and sibling dead, dog #2

Tenant moves out, leaves dog in apartment. "We'll keep it until we find it a home." Daughter falls in love, dog #3

Cat #2, 16 yo and cat #1, 18 yo cross the rainbow bridge.

Driving down the highway and see a fluff ball staggering in the median, cat #6

Neighbor stops in front of my house while I am raking the yard. "Do you hear any crying coming from my engine compartment?", cat #7

As I write this, I can not believe how much happiness my two puppies bring to my life. I run/walk 3-5 miles 6x/wk in the morning. "Want to go for a run?" wife "No", daughter [laughter], I look at my two compadres and they literally start dancing. "Want to help clean outside the house", "No" in chorus and who's dancing. "Want to go for a car ride and walk around the park?", that's right you guessed it. At night, after getting the Heisman, I sleep on my side, one dog against my stomach, the other behind my knees. I don't have to worry about my showers contributing to my water bill because my dogs are happy to clean me, all I have to do is let them.

I have recently become aware of the homeless pet crisis. If, in the future, I find my household can accommodate another pet, I believe I will foster dogs. There are many agencies looking for homes to care for dogs until forever homes can be found.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2XJO7zMQ3mk

I think any dog would be lucky to have you as its master! Best of luck!

 
while I understand that I am not omnipotent, like many people, death has sadly shaped my path. I do understand the inevitability of death and during my dog's last year I was kind of hoping I was prepared, as I kept reminding my wife that he was closer to the rainbow bridge than chasing a squirrel. I am in the position of having lost both parents, all grandparents, my MIL and having no relatives that I have spoken with in 25+ years. each time you lose something, imo it's a piece of you.

if anyone can have a last straw, i thought losing my MIL 15 years ago was mine. however, I think this may have been worse. simply because my standard answer to anything now is "i don't care". hence not knowing that I can put myself into a situation with an inevitable ending.
Not meant to compare in any way, but I've lost parents, grandparents, a sister, cousins, etc. So far I've had to deal with the deaths of 5 dogs. And it never gets easy. Most recent one was on Thanksgiving day. Hurt like hell. But I try to focus on the good times rather than the loss. It still hurts but I remember the joy and companionship she gave us and the fact that we gave her a chance when she was down to her last days (literally) at the shelter. Even though we still have 3 dogs we'll likely add another to the zoo. In the end it's your decision but getting another doesn't minimize the life and memories of your first dog in any way.
This is the most important part IMO.Lay down at night knowing you gave Jasper the best damn life he would have had otherwise.

My current rescue is getting old and after having one of the most horrific first parts of her life one could imagine, when I find myself getting depressed about her aging, I just try to remember - she is the luckiest damn dog on the planet and if she was going to have a life on earth, I know she got the best damn one.

I have always worked from home, and other than vacation, am rarely away from her. My long term GF also took to her like it was her own. She's the queen of the house with no attention spent elsewhere since we don't have children (or many friends ;) )

Anyway - try to remember that. Jasper could have had #### for life, but he had the best. That should keep you positive.
appreciate the kind words.......he was a kill shelter rescue and i can't imagine his 1st year. that said, we always said to ourselves if dogs had a powerball lottery, our guy hit the 1.3billion.truly, i think any shelter dog that gets rescued has won the lottery and why anyone would spend money on a dog is beyond me.................

from my conversations with my wife today, it seems as if she had already turned her launch key and has requested i do the same.
Sounds like a keeper.
additionally, she has moved onto names for the dog. she is leaning something masculine Italian. enzo is out, that has been retired for DD's dog and out of respect, not in consideration. jasper jax was jj or jazzy. i suggested the new dog could be called RD (replacement dog). have not heard back................

 
Hi Chem X ... so sorry for your loss.

A new dog doesn't replace Jasper, nor will it cause the many warm memories to fade away.

While the grieving process is different for everyone, don't let feelings of confusion or guilt surrounding a new dog cloud your judgement.

I'm a firm believer in the idea that we don't go out and find our pets … they find us. You'll know when the time is right, because the right pet will absolutely steal your heart all over again.

I wish you all the luck in the world with your new journey. When you do find another furry friend, please post some photos.

 
while I understand that I am not omnipotent, like many people, death has sadly shaped my path. I do understand the inevitability of death and during my dog's last year I was kind of hoping I was prepared, as I kept reminding my wife that he was closer to the rainbow bridge than chasing a squirrel. I am in the position of having lost both parents, all grandparents, my MIL and having no relatives that I have spoken with in 25+ years. each time you lose something, imo it's a piece of you.

if anyone can have a last straw, i thought losing my MIL 15 years ago was mine. however, I think this may have been worse. simply because my standard answer to anything now is "i don't care". hence not knowing that I can put myself into a situation with an inevitable ending.
Not meant to compare in any way, but I've lost parents, grandparents, a sister, cousins, etc. So far I've had to deal with the deaths of 5 dogs. And it never gets easy. Most recent one was on Thanksgiving day. Hurt like hell. But I try to focus on the good times rather than the loss. It still hurts but I remember the joy and companionship she gave us and the fact that we gave her a chance when she was down to her last days (literally) at the shelter. Even though we still have 3 dogs we'll likely add another to the zoo. In the end it's your decision but getting another doesn't minimize the life and memories of your first dog in any way.
This is the most important part IMO.Lay down at night knowing you gave Jasper the best damn life he would have had otherwise.

My current rescue is getting old and after having one of the most horrific first parts of her life one could imagine, when I find myself getting depressed about her aging, I just try to remember - she is the luckiest damn dog on the planet and if she was going to have a life on earth, I know she got the best damn one.

I have always worked from home, and other than vacation, am rarely away from her. My long term GF also took to her like it was her own. She's the queen of the house with no attention spent elsewhere since we don't have children (or many friends ;) )

Anyway - try to remember that. Jasper could have had #### for life, but he had the best. That should keep you positive.
appreciate the kind words.......he was a kill shelter rescue and i can't imagine his 1st year. that said, we always said to ourselves if dogs had a powerball lottery, our guy hit the 1.3billion.truly, i think any shelter dog that gets rescued has won the lottery and why anyone would spend money on a dog is beyond me.................

from my conversations with my wife today, it seems as if she had already turned her launch key and has requested i do the same.
Sounds like a keeper.
additionally, she has moved onto names for the dog. she is leaning something masculine Italian. enzo is out, that has been retired for DD's dog and out of respect, not in consideration. jasper jax was jj or jazzy. i suggested the new dog could be called RD (replacement dog). have not heard back................
name him shuke

or bowser

 
while I understand that I am not omnipotent, like many people, death has sadly shaped my path. I do understand the inevitability of death and during my dog's last year I was kind of hoping I was prepared, as I kept reminding my wife that he was closer to the rainbow bridge than chasing a squirrel. I am in the position of having lost both parents, all grandparents, my MIL and having no relatives that I have spoken with in 25+ years. each time you lose something, imo it's a piece of you.

if anyone can have a last straw, i thought losing my MIL 15 years ago was mine. however, I think this may have been worse. simply because my standard answer to anything now is "i don't care". hence not knowing that I can put myself into a situation with an inevitable ending.
Not meant to compare in any way, but I've lost parents, grandparents, a sister, cousins, etc. So far I've had to deal with the deaths of 5 dogs. And it never gets easy. Most recent one was on Thanksgiving day. Hurt like hell. But I try to focus on the good times rather than the loss. It still hurts but I remember the joy and companionship she gave us and the fact that we gave her a chance when she was down to her last days (literally) at the shelter. Even though we still have 3 dogs we'll likely add another to the zoo. In the end it's your decision but getting another doesn't minimize the life and memories of your first dog in any way.
This is the most important part IMO.Lay down at night knowing you gave Jasper the best damn life he would have had otherwise.

My current rescue is getting old and after having one of the most horrific first parts of her life one could imagine, when I find myself getting depressed about her aging, I just try to remember - she is the luckiest damn dog on the planet and if she was going to have a life on earth, I know she got the best damn one.

I have always worked from home, and other than vacation, am rarely away from her. My long term GF also took to her like it was her own. She's the queen of the house with no attention spent elsewhere since we don't have children (or many friends ;) )

Anyway - try to remember that. Jasper could have had #### for life, but he had the best. That should keep you positive.
appreciate the kind words.......he was a kill shelter rescue and i can't imagine his 1st year. that said, we always said to ourselves if dogs had a powerball lottery, our guy hit the 1.3billion.truly, i think any shelter dog that gets rescued has won the lottery and why anyone would spend money on a dog is beyond me.................

from my conversations with my wife today, it seems as if she had already turned her launch key and has requested i do the same.
Sounds like a keeper.
additionally, she has moved onto names for the dog. she is leaning something masculine Italian. enzo is out, that has been retired for DD's dog and out of respect, not in consideration. jasper jax was jj or jazzy. i suggested the new dog could be called RD (replacement dog). have not heard back................
Michelangelo

 
I say get another dog and call him Jasper 2 electric bugaloo. also when did you stop ending your posts with :rant:

 
What you describe sounds sort of like the 9 year old dog I adopted when I bought my first house. I lived alone (but did have a girlfriend who visited often) so it was just Bailey and I a lot of the time. She was the first dog I had that was an indoor dog (all our family dogs growing up slept out in the back yard) and we formed a very tight bond. An amazing dog who was far better behaved than I could ever take credit for. When she died at 16 (on Christmas eve no less) I was devastated, but by then my girlfriend had turned into my wife and we had a 2nd dog who was really young at the time, so you couldn't stay mopey too long.

I've owned 3 dogs since Bailey died (and 1 of the 3 I had to put down in 2014) and none of them really compare to her but we have just as tight of a bond in our own way. It hasn't taken anything away from that very special first relationship with a dog. I would absolutely recommend getting another one, it won't be a replacement, but you'll form your own special new bond with this one too. When the next one dies, it'll be just as painful but there's no question that the joy each dog has brought to me over the years was very much worth the few days of mourning when they passed.

 
I may be in the same boat although I have two dogs. One is 9, the other 8. The 8 year old has cancer and most likely won't be around much longer but I'm hoping for a miracle. If Benny dies I don't know if I would want another dog any time soon. My other dog Otto I know would be devestated as they are best friends and I'd be worried to introduce another dog to him.

If I were in your position I would absolutely get another dog when I felt comfortable to move on. I think Jasper would want you to do that. You can never replace Jasper but he will always be in your heart. Sorry for your loss.

 
What you describe sounds sort of like the 9 year old dog I adopted when I bought my first house. I lived alone (but did have a girlfriend who visited often) so it was just Bailey and I a lot of the time. She was the first dog I had that was an indoor dog (all our family dogs growing up slept out in the back yard) and we formed a very tight bond. An amazing dog who was far better behaved than I could ever take credit for. When she died at 16 (on Christmas eve no less) I was devastated, but by then my girlfriend had turned into my wife and we had a 2nd dog who was really young at the time, so you couldn't stay mopey too long.

I've owned 3 dogs since Bailey died (and 1 of the 3 I had to put down in 2014) and none of them really compare to her but we have just as tight of a bond in our own way. It hasn't taken anything away from that very special first relationship with a dog. I would absolutely recommend getting another one, it won't be a replacement, but you'll form your own special new bond with this one too. When the next one dies, it'll be just as painful but there's no question that the joy each dog has brought to me over the years was very much worth the few days of mourning when they passed.
:goodposting: I had to put down my beautiful German Shepherd, Buckeye on valentine's day 2010. One of the most difficult things I've ever had to do. From the day after he was gone it felt like there was something missing. It took my family another 8 months before we were able to find another dog to live with us. Not to replace Buckeye, mind you, because nothing could replace him. But because something was missing.

Almost 6 years later, Kodiak the Black Lab has become an integral part of our family. He didn't replace Buckeye in my heart. Being honest, Kodiak is as dumb as a box of hair whereas Buckeye was Mensa-level genius. Buckeye would (and did) protect our home from intruders where Kodiak would just walk up to a burglar begging to be petted.

In every measurable way Buckeye was a better dog than Kodiak is. But you know what? It doesn't matter. Kodiak gives and receives love, and he is a valuable part of our family. I'm glad I got another dog, and I think you will be, too.

 
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We have two dogs and I've already told my wife these will be our last. We love them and they have a good home but we don't have a fenced yard and we live on a busy street - we can only let them out when we walk them. And as the kids have gotten older they don't spend as much time with them.

I realize this isn't an answer - ultimately I think only you know whether getting another dog is the right thing. Trust yourself. Good luck.

 
Get two with a few years age difference. They can keep each other company and when one goes you have the other for companionship and not getting to that "final straw/I don't care" place.

Note I have never actually owned two dogs at once so that may be awful advice, but we are looking to get a rescue to go with our existing 7 year old retriever for similar reasons (and also because I really ####### love dogs)

 
I guess the biggest tragedy is a parent outliving their pet.........

surprised all answers are 1 sided, when I really think I was looking for the other one.
What's your age?I can see not getting a new dog if I was an empty nester looking for a freer calendar.
I think exactly the opposite...

I had Bailey, our yellow lab, for 16 wonderful years. Lasted from the time my youngest daughter was 1 all the way until her senior year in high school. Phenomenal family dog. First pet we've ever had to put down. Although we did it the right way it was still devastating. My wife didn't want to go through that again with another dog. I already had 2 kids off to college and the house was getting quieter. The summer before my youngest went to college I knew we needed a dog. It had been 18 months, and I didn't want to be empty nesters with me traveling fairly often with my wife not having a companion. Although she was hesitant, we went to go see a litter of chocolate lab puppies and one just started rolling on the grass at her feet and under her sun dress. He chose her specifically and he's a huge part of all of our lives now. Louie will never be Bailey. Bailey will never be Louie. They are different. But can't imagine life without him. We get so much from him. That being said, I do think there will be a time where we won't want a dog. If we're too old or frail. I'm not a small, yappy dog type of guy but 100 lb labs aren't for old folks.

I say get a dog - when you are ready. It took us awhile to be ready.

 
i appreciate the feedback and replies. it seems most, if not all, are on board with another. obviously everyone has lost a pet and had that gut punch. i did see a couple of posts where guys didn't jump back in. my update is that my wife has basically pushed us forward to receive a new guy Wednesday evening.

my personal update is that i don't feel that i am ready now and i honestly might not ever be ready again. i think she is gallantly doing the get back up on a bicycle thing for me, which i appreciate. i told her that i don't know and i kind of hoped she would get my answer, but she has her heart set.

i know my boys DD and FUJB recently lost their friends and i think that hurt me too a lot, as i kind of know their feelings as well.

i guess my bottom line is that today wasn't a good day and tomorrow might not be either. if i can't rear mirror in some respect my pal, it really won't matter what i do going forward. i still got up and got dressed and came to work, but it just isn't the same and i just don't care enough........

let's see what happens tomorrow night and if i can turn this around. you know, once you've checked out mentally and emotionally, it's hard to get it back.

name update: i haven't bothered........wife threw out dante.

 
i appreciate the feedback and replies. it seems most, if not all, are on board with another. obviously everyone has lost a pet and had that gut punch. i did see a couple of posts where guys didn't jump back in. my update is that my wife has basically pushed us forward to receive a new guy Wednesday evening.

my personal update is that i don't feel that i am ready now and i honestly might not ever be ready again. i think she is gallantly doing the get back up on a bicycle thing for me, which i appreciate. i told her that i don't know and i kind of hoped she would get my answer, but she has her heart set.

i know my boys DD and FUJB recently lost their friends and i think that hurt me too a lot, as i kind of know their feelings as well.

i guess my bottom line is that today wasn't a good day and tomorrow might not be either. if i can't rear mirror in some respect my pal, it really won't matter what i do going forward. i still got up and got dressed and came to work, but it just isn't the same and i just don't care enough........

let's see what happens tomorrow night and if i can turn this around. you know, once you've checked out mentally and emotionally, it's hard to get it back.

name update: i haven't bothered........wife threw out dante.
Vesuvius imo

 
I lost mine right before Thanksgiving. I don't think I want to go through it again. Maybe it'll get easier as time passes but for me I don't feel any better about it than I did when it happened.

 
I got my first Yellow Labrador pup when I was 24. This dog went everywhere with my wife and I while we were dating and then getting married. The dog swam in every Great Lake, in the Atlantic, Gulf of Mexico. At 13 she had a stroke in our yard and collapsed and died. We were devastated..I was so distraught because it felt like I lost my best friend. This dog could read my mind and we were connected as much as an animal and human could be. I thought I will never get another or there will never be another like her. Then one day about 6 months later my wife and daughter brought home an 8 week Yellow Lab pup. I was pissed off because I was not ready for another dog.

Well..after 6 months I said the same things about this one..she went everywhere with me and became as good of a friend as my first one did but in a different way because they had different personalities.

Dogs adapt to humans and vice versa. It might take a older rescue a little while but once they feel safe and trust you things will be fine.

 
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I say get another dog and call him Jasper 2 electric bugaloo. also when did you stop ending your posts with :rant:
ckrdr, in honour of you, I have decided to add :hot: to my signature line. you are not the first to mention this. [icon] also mentioned this, but I swear I remember that guy from years ago threatening me. maybe it isn't him.........

 
Thought I would provide an update and say that we adopted another beagle, "fresco", on 1/13/2016.

however, I am not fully invested in the adoption and I think the dog senses my limited participation. by all accounts, he appears to be a good older dog, around 7-8. only issue is that he barks and cries when we are not home.

I am still struggling with the loss of my dog. this is 'a' dog right now, he is just not my dog, so to speak. I understand my wife's thought process in pushing through this adoption, but I am nowhere near the state of mind to be a good enough pet parent right now. over time I may get my mojo back, but right now I just don't have the energy or fire to be of much value. I also wouldn't care much if he returned back to his foster home, though I think my wife would be quite annoyed with me. so here I am, stuck between a dog I don't have much interest in and a wife that I would severely disappoint.

I guess there could be much worse things in life right now, but in my darkest moments I can't help but think about my dog's last months and how I was helpless to find a way to help him.

 
Went through the same about 4 years ago. Lost "my dog". My first dog I owned as an adult. She passed, at age 10, a couple months after my son was born -- She was always as strong as an ox and I figured that she and my boy would have several years together. That's the part that was hard for me -- she was so good with kids so submissive and gentle (while otherwise being a dumb oaf) and she lorded over my wife while she was pregnant -- always making sure she was safe and everything was ok. She'd put her head on her belly and just sit there when my wife was on the couch. I know it's probably just misplaced attribution of emotion, seeing what I wanted to see -- but you dog-people know how dogs "just know" some things. My dog knew our kid was coming and wanted a new family member and playmate.

Anyway, her passing really messed me up for about a month. Sounds similar to what you're going through. We got a new puppy about 4 months later. No ragrets. He's an idiot and hilarious and a good dog. It doesn't diminish or replace my previous dog. It's just another chapter in life.

Go get your new dog.

Just read the above post. Give your new dog a chance. It's not a competition.

 
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Also adopted an older beagle. So far he's "marked his territory" in a few places and tried to beat up the little dog...but other than that he's okay. :D He's also a bow legged gimp so I take pity on him.

 
tldr.

Our dogs are as bit as much of a family member as are the human family members are. That being said we've always had them put down when the time of their suffering out weighed the quality of life they were living. And then we went and found a new addition to the family, not a replacement, a new addition.

It might have affected me differently if they died or got lost when they are young, before their time. But, luckily that hasn't happened to me and their deaths are more of a relief from their suffering. Death is a part of life, it makes life worth living, if you get too hung up on that you might have deeper depression issues.

 
Thought I would provide an update and say that we adopted another beagle, "fresco", on 1/13/2016.

however, I am not fully invested in the adoption and I think the dog senses my limited participation. by all accounts, he appears to be a good older dog, around 7-8. only issue is that he barks and cries when we are not home.

I am still struggling with the loss of my dog. this is 'a' dog right now, he is just not my dog, so to speak. I understand my wife's thought process in pushing through this adoption, but I am nowhere near the state of mind to be a good enough pet parent right now. over time I may get my mojo back, but right now I just don't have the energy or fire to be of much value. I also wouldn't care much if he returned back to his foster home, though I think my wife would be quite annoyed with me. so here I am, stuck between a dog I don't have much interest in and a wife that I would severely disappoint.

I guess there could be much worse things in life right now, but in my darkest moments I can't help but think about my dog's last months and how I was helpless to find a way to help him.
This is kind of how I thought I'd be if I got a new dog. I want to be "all-in" if we get another, but I just don't have that in me right now.

More than anything, I want to be fair to the dog.

 

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