Bull#### is everywhere.
There is very little that you will encounter in life that has not been, in some way, infused with bull####; not all of it bad. The general day-to-day organic free-range bull#### is often necessary, or, at the very least, innocuous: "Oh, what a beautiful baby! I'm sure it'll grow into that head!" That kind of bull####, in many ways, provides important social contract fertilizer, which keeps people from making each other cry all day. But then, there's the more pernicious bull####; the premediated, institutional bull#### designed to obscure and distract. Designed by whom? The bull####-ocracy. It comes in three basic flavours:
1. Making bad things sound like good things. "Organic, all-natural cupcakes", because "Factory-made sugar oatmeal balls" doesn't sell. "Patriot Act", because "Are-you-scared-enough-to-let-me-look-at-all-your-phone-records? Act" doesn't sell. So, whenever something's been titled "Freedom, Family, Fairness and Health America", take a good, long sniff. Chances are it's been manufactured in a facility that may contain traces of bull####.
2. Hiding the bad things under mountains of bull####. Complexity. "You know, I would love to download Drizzy's latest Meek Mill diss, but I'm not really interested right now in reading Tolstoy's iTunes agreement. So, I'll just click "Agree", even if it grants Apple prima nocta with my spouse!" Here's another one: simply put, "Banks shouldn't be able to bet your pension money on red" Bull####ly put it's, "Hey, a handful of billionaires can't buy our elections, right? Of course not. They can only pour unlimited, anonymous cash into a 501(c)4 if 50% is devoted to Issue Education, otherwise they'd have to 501(c)6 it, or funnel it openly through a non-campaign coordinating Super PAC, with a quarter- I think they're asleep now, we can sneak out!"
And finally, the bull#### of infinite possibility. These bull####ters cover their unwillingness to act under the guise of unending inquiry. "We can't do anything, because we don't yet know everything." "We cannot take action on climate change until everyone in the world agrees gay marriage vaccines won't cause our children to marry goats who are gonna come for our guns"
But the good news is this: bull####ters have gotten pretty lazy, and their work is easily detected, and looking for it is kind of a pleasant way to pass the time, like an I spy of bull####. So I say to you tonight, friends, the best defense against bull#### is vigilance. So, if you smell something, say something.
