What's new
Fantasy Football - Footballguys Forums

This is a sample guest message. Register a free account today to become a member! Once signed in, you'll be able to participate on this site by adding your own topics and posts, as well as connect with other members through your own private inbox!

Top 100 Heavy Metal and glam rock acts from the MTV era - it's still real to me (2 Viewers)

Nuno's a great shredder, one of my faves from the era. Apparently Tom Morello went to see Nuno play when Nuno was like 16 and he was like "WTF, how is this even possible?" Nuno and Morello would later team up to cover Beastie's Sabotage , and with Scott Ian, the Game of Thrones theme song. So he's still out there having fun. 

Hole Hearted is solid, and I actually like Get the Funk Out. 
Rest in Peace from the third album is pretty good. 

 
Nuno's a great shredder, one of my faves from the era. Apparently Tom Morello went to see Nuno play when Nuno was like 16 and he was like "WTF, how is this even possible?" Nuno and Morello would later team up to cover Beastie's Sabotage , and with Scott Ian, the Game of Thrones theme song. So he's still out there having fun. 

Hole Hearted is solid, and I actually like Get the Funk Out. 
Rest in Peace from the third album is pretty good. 
I always loved the song from Bill and Teds Excellent Adventure where they were rampaging through the mall.  I think it was instrumental only.

 
42. Extreme

On their third album they tried to put up another acoustic hit, Tragic Comic, which is tragically fu-fu-cking sta-stupid  

BUT, I have to say, as a whole I LIKED Extreme III, and I still appreciate the three bombastic, introspective, ridiculous tracks that make up Side III  
III Sides is a fantastic concept album that was unfortunately released about a year too late to make an impact in a post-Nevermind world.

But if the same album had been released under the name "Queensrÿche" then it would have been hailed as a worthy successor to Mindcrime.

Gary Cherone is a good singer but was absolutely the wrong choice for Van Halen. "Hey, you know that band that is known for group harmony vocals and acoustic ballads? Let's get their lead singer but then not do those things! Also, let's have him sing exactly like our previous singer even though it's clearly out of his comfort range."

edit: "Also, you know how the members of our band tend to wear casual clothes that express a strong blue-collar and masculine identity? Let's make sure the new guy doesn't do that."

 
Last edited by a moderator:
plinko said:
44. Winger

Stuart's favorites, only somewhat unfairly maligned, I mean, they're not NELSON.. but they are pretty damn wimpy.

Seventeen  you're such a macho risk taker Kip Winger, singing about banging a high school junior.
Madalaine | 2 tuff 2 tame
Hungry this isn't bad
Cover of Purple Haze because pissing on sacred ground is a great way to get respect

But their best song for real, and it's super wimpy -- Headed for a Heartbreak
I saw Winger open for somebody (Tesla maybe) and Kip tripped on stage.  His base never stopped playing even with no hands on it.  Amazing. 

 
I saw Winger open for somebody (Tesla maybe) and Kip tripped on stage.  His base never stopped playing even with no hands on it.  Amazing. 
 How tf..

winger opened for scorpions when they came through in 88

 
Last edited by a moderator:
plinko said:
From my perspective, and my friend group at the time, most of whom were also in my Catholic Youth group... Stryper were solid and respectable because the songs were actually pretty good.  But none of our parents gave a crap what we listened to anyway, which was nice.

Lyrical content aside, they're basically Dokken-lite.

We're working our way through the second tier hair dudes

42. Extreme

OK two concerns about Kid Ego  
- Word always was this song was about David Lee Roth?  If so, why is this song about David Lee Roth?  Did he snub these guys in some way?  David Lee Roth is a goof, I can think of bigger egos than David Lee Roth, in much smaller bands, without even trying.
- Apparently Gary Cherone hates/disowns this song now?  Did he make up with Dave?  He would later replace Dave's replacement and it would go super well.  Also, does Gary know that, now that all the smoke's cleared, this is still pretty much his best song?

Presented without comment or opinion, Extreme had an anti-abortion ballad on their first record.  Not trying to stir up emotions, I am only here to present interesting information.

On their next album they made a love song that many people seem to think is about a young Mennonite couple who are saying "I love you" to each other but not yet ####ing.

Me, I'm not sure Nuno and Gary are so clever, in any case.

Their first record was mostly a really fun listen if not anything particularly new.  They too were on a thing about teenage lassies but we can assume at the very least they were using a condom.  

Their second album was mostly pretty awful, save for the two acoustic numbers

More Than Words
Hole Hearted

On their third album they tried to put up another acoustic hit, Tragic Comic, which is tragically fu-fu-cking sta-stupid  

BUT, I have to say, as a whole I LIKED Extreme III, and I still appreciate the three bombastic, introspective, ridiculous tracks that make up Side III  

As for Van Halen III, well, I remember checking out the CD from the library and copying it.  I kind of liked this one, bombastic as well. (LIVE!)  Not much else to say, other than I doubt I'll think to touch on this later period again when we get to the VH stuff

Tom Breihan Number Ones on More Than Words
I remember a joke from SNL Weekend Update... at the time they added Cherone, Eddie was having a hip replaced... the joke went something like, "Eddie Van Halen was hoping for a hip replacement, but all he could get was Gary Cherone."

 
Last edited by a moderator:
45. Kix

Hagerstowners, with a West Virginian on vocals, these dudes are definitely inbred.

I kid!  Actually Piedmont area, where Steve Whiteman is from.. I'm jealous

Their early #### sounds like AC/DC as played by Slade.  Will talk more about Slade when we get to you-know-whom.

The Itch

Somehow my ex wife liked Cool Kids.  I never met anybody else in my life who liked or even knew Cool Kids.  Boondock Pennsyltucky thing I guess.  

Their next album Midnite Dynamite wants to be good but IMO it sounds like crap and the better songs never really cut loose... 

Their fourth, Blow My Fuse did the trick.

Cold Blood
Blow My Fuse
Don't Close Your Eyes

Steve Whiteman has never not had bangs.  WHEN YOU FIND YOUR LOOK, STICK WITH IT


Love these guys. Rumor has it Bret Micheals saw these guys in Baltimore when they first started copied their act for Poison and Poison got all the media and everything for stealing their look and stage act. Never confirmed nor denied this was the case. 

Kix has some solid tunes and play on words too. Its wasn't until after HS I realized what Girl Money was about. 

 
MindCrime said:
Outside of bands that I’ve worked for and toured with, Kix is the band I’ve seen most in my life. In part because I grew up in Southeastern PA, and in part because they are still one of the best live bands ever. They used to play the York P.A. Fairgrounds every year around the holidays, plus all of their national tours brought them into the Hershey/ Philly/ Baltimore region. Great band. And yes, while it’s not my favorite, I still even listen to Cool Kids on occasion.


Curious who you toured with? Kix also has a nice live Album that gives a nice taste to what they are like live. 

 
plinko said:
43. Stryper

If you can believe it they are from Orange County.

Their name is a cutesy reference to Jesus' whip scars, as foretold by the prophet Isaiah.  As in, hey, check out the strypes on that guy they're killing  

Look, they are the only Christian rock band of any type anywhere, that I am aware of.. that actually had chops, relative to their secular peers.  

I guess the next best band in this vein, at this time was Bloodgood?

Reason for the Season -- 1984.. Christmas metal while Savatage was still doing Badfinger covers

Soldiers Under Command   slams

Honestly Broke through with an extra drippy ballad of course 

Free

The Way -- Get past goofball lyrics and Oz Fox could play*

Three pretty successful records, the follow up to To Hell With The Devil was more of the same but not as good.  In 1990 they took off the yellow and black, donned leather and denim and tried a more secular approach.  Amy Grant, the other Christian artist with any chops, had some success with this move, albeit without the leather.  

But we all rolled our eyes and that was it for a while.  Nowadays AFAIK they're together and tour and make records in full force.  Because why wouldn't they be?

George Lynch, whore that he is, has made two albums with Michael Sweet in the last ten years as well. 

* Sense a trend... nobody up and down this whole list went anywhere without a damn good git-fiddler.


As good as Sweet is he's made some few head scratching comments over the yrs like "They aren't a Christian band" and some other things. Talent guy who I think comes off as he thinks he's a lot better then he really is. 

 
plinko said:
From my perspective, and my friend group at the time, most of whom were also in my Catholic Youth group... Stryper were solid and respectable because the songs were actually pretty good.  But none of our parents gave a crap what we listened to anyway, which was nice.

Lyrical content aside, they're basically Dokken-lite.

We're working our way through the second tier hair dudes

42. Extreme

OK two concerns about Kid Ego  
- Word always was this song was about David Lee Roth?  If so, why is this song about David Lee Roth?  Did he snub these guys in some way?  David Lee Roth is a goof, I can think of bigger egos than David Lee Roth, in much smaller bands, without even trying.
- Apparently Gary Cherone hates/disowns this song now?  Did he make up with Dave?  He would later replace Dave's replacement and it would go super well.  Also, does Gary know that, now that all the smoke's cleared, this is still pretty much his best song?

Presented without comment or opinion, Extreme had an anti-abortion ballad on their first record.  Not trying to stir up emotions, I am only here to present interesting information.

On their next album they made a love song that many people seem to think is about a young Mennonite couple who are saying "I love you" to each other but not yet ####ing.

Me, I'm not sure Nuno and Gary are so clever, in any case.

Their first record was mostly a really fun listen if not anything particularly new.  They too were on a thing about teenage lassies but we can assume at the very least they were using a condom.  

Their second album was mostly pretty awful, save for the two acoustic numbers

More Than Words
Hole Hearted

On their third album they tried to put up another acoustic hit, Tragic Comic, which is tragically fu-fu-cking sta-stupid  

BUT, I have to say, as a whole I LIKED Extreme III, and I still appreciate the three bombastic, introspective, ridiculous tracks that make up Side III  

As for Van Halen III, well, I remember checking out the CD from the library and copying it.  I kind of liked this one, bombastic as well. (LIVE!)  Not much else to say, other than I doubt I'll think to touch on this later period again when we get to the VH stuff

Tom Breihan Number Ones on More Than Words


My one customer at work is a talent buyer. He grew up in NYC Long Island. Did a gig at the University he attended where Peter Tork of the Mokees saw him and liked what he did. Helped get him a few local bands to the bar he worked at there. His first gig was starting out helping set gigs up for Adam Sandler and Kevin James before fame. Awhile back he talked to Sandler at the local University West Chester here in PA 30 Mins from me before Adam got really famous.

Anyway one of the first bands he got to book was Extreme because he knew the Sessions keyboardist or something of the band. I know I have this story wrong in some parts but he knew a member of the band or someone who knew them. Anyway they weren't suppose to be apart of the blll he was suppose to be doing and one of the bands pulled out last minute. So this was the days before Cell Phones and Emails. Apparently whoever the guy he knew called him and said he heard he was in a jam and if he how much $$$ for the gig did he have left for a band. My friend told him and he said "Ok Tell them Extreme is on the bill and what time you need them there." Asked his buddy how he found out and he said Gary Cherone knew one of the guys in the other band and suggested to him to check into it. So Gary asked this guy of my friend if he knew who the promoter or anyone was and see if they could get on the bill. Extreme was also one of the tapes my Buddy bought when he got big time in collecting the music. 

 
41. Warrant

Jani Lane was born John Kennedy Oswald on February 1, 1964 in Akron, Ohio
Whaaat??? Did I know this??

With connections from siblings Eric and Vicky in and around the music scene (and with his parents' help), Lane made a name for himself at a very young age. He played drums under the pseudonym "Mitch Dynamite" in clubs by age 11 and with a local band "Pokerface." By that time, his siblings had left for college or marriage, although Vicky was still active in the entertainment industry in northeast Ohio and southwest Florida. Due to Vicky's numerous connections, Lane was able to network with industry execs in pursuit of his dream. Lane graduated from Field High School, in Mogadore, Ohio, a nearby city to Brimfield in 1982.
I also played "clubs" at age 11 under the pseudonym "Mitch Dynamite".  

After high school, Lane joined the band Cyren, featuring vocalist Skip Hammonds, guitarist John Weakland, bassist Don Hoover (and later Rusty Fohner) with Lane on drums and vocals. Many of Cyren's shows opened for a popular local band called Risque'. When their bassist, Al Collins, noticed Lane's vocal talents, he convinced Lane to form a new band they eventually called Dorian Gray. The new band also included Steven Chamberlin on drums and Dave Chamberlin on lead guitar. Dorian Gray was designed to have Lane as the lead vocalist and to perform original material, but Lane wasn't ready to be the lead singer and quickly returned to the drum kit. Billy Denmead was hired as lead vocalist and rhythm guitarist. After only a few shows, Collins left the band, vowing to put a band together when Lane was ready to be a lead vocalist.

Lane moved to Florida in 1983 with Dorian Gray. He eventually formed Plain Jane with Collins and Chamberlin, adopting the stage name "Jani Lane" (Chamberlin would also soon rechristen himself Steven Sweet). He took the name "Jani" from his German grandparents, who spelled his name "Jani" and pronounced it "Yay-nee."
I also never knew it was Yay-nee Lane. And I was a borderline fan of these guys.

Lane, Collins, and Chamberlin recorded the first Plain Jane four-track demos at their rented house in Winter Park, Florida. Although reluctant to leave Florida, they rented a trailer in the spring of 1984 and moved to California with hopes of landing a record deal. 

By 1985, Plain Jane had become a regular feature on the Los Angeles club circuit and opened many shows for a band called Warrant. Plain Jane's bassist and guitarist both left the band on the same day Warrant's singer and drummer quit. Erik Turner, who had founded Warrant in July 1984, was impressed by Plain Jane's songwriting and vocal performance and invited Lane and Sweet to jam with his band at Hollywood's db Sound in September 1986.
"Warrant" is like "Sheriff" but more specific.  "Warrant" is a terrible band name.  Why not Plain Jani, and stay on as Mitch Dynamite?

32 Pennies
So Damn Pretty

^^^ sorry, these are bangers 

Down Boys

Sometimes She Cries its true buddy

Heaven

so they got pretty huge on all that, went back to the studio and then gave us this big dumb monster

Cherry Pie

as well as
Uncle Tom's Cabin
What?  What is this song about? This blows real bad.

I Saw Red .. .. I don't hate it?

I don't know then some other stuff happened and ultimately things didn't end well for our hero J.  He was a good one though, no bull####.

 
Warrant sort of rocked. I have no idea what Uncle Tom's Cabin was about, but cruising around in my 69 Mustang with that song pumping was good times--good times.

And let's be honest, the only reason any of us liked Cherry Pie was Bobbie Brown. 

Was it Evilgrin who posted a story about them meeting Jani Lane and abandoning him somewhere or am I imagining that? 

 
41. Warrant

Whaaat??? Did I know this??

I also played "clubs" at age 11 under the pseudonym "Mitch Dynamite".  

I also never knew it was Yay-nee Lane. And I was a borderline fan of these guys.

"Warrant" is like "Sheriff" but more specific.  "Warrant" is a terrible band name.  Why not Plain Jani, and stay on as Mitch Dynamite?

32 Pennies
So Damn Pretty

^^^ sorry, these are bangers 

Down Boys

Sometimes She Cries its true buddy

Heaven

so they got pretty huge on all that, went back to the studio and then gave us this big dumb monster

Cherry Pie

as well as
Uncle Tom's Cabin
What?  What is this song about? This blows real bad.

I Saw Red .. .. I don't hate it?

I don't know then some other stuff happened and ultimately things didn't end well for our hero J.  He was a good one though, no bull####.
Fun fact, Mr. Oswald was Ohio Guitarist of the Year at some point early in his career before he became Jani Lane. Just for clarification, Field HS is NOT in Mogadore. It’s in Brimfield, OH. How would you know this odd fact beer, you ask? Because I went to Field until 7th grade then transferred to another local school (Rootstown) where I eventually graduated. We played all those schools in football and Mogadore was probably our biggest rival in the early 80’s. I still dislike that town.

Anyhow, one of the guys I worked with knew Mr. Oswald from school and tipped me to them right before they hit it big. Really dug their vibe, shame he couldn’t get his head out of the bottle.

 
Pretty sure I'm remembering this correctly:

When Warrant presented their much-anticipated follow-up to Dirty Rotten Filthy Stinking Rich to their record company, the CEO at the time said it needed a good "party song" and told them to go write one and include it on the new album. They came up with the song Cherry Pie. Looking back, that song is a steaming pile of dung, but man did I love it when it came out. These guys have not aged well for me, but I do still crank Down Boys when I hear it.

 
The only song I liked from Warrent was Uncle Tom’s Cabin.
Cherry Pie is one of the worst songs ever recorded.   I hope to never hear that song again.  I like Uncle Toms Cabin, Mr Rainmaker, and I Saw Red from the Cherry Pie album. The lyrics are weak in I Sat Red but somehow it works for me. 

 
What documentary had a hair metal band (I think Warrant) going into their record label office and instead of seeing their own poster on the wall, saw a grunge poster and realized they’d been passed by?

 
Was on vacation the last week, no phone, no email, no social media, no FBG. This was the first thread I had to get caught up on.

Nothing really to add other than I did just listen to the Talk Is Jericho podcast with Michael and Robert Sweet from Stryper and it was entertaining. The Sweets love Jesus, and they love The Sweets. But in a kinda wholesome way. They had their big rock star moments, and they enjoy talking about them.

They did explain that the name Stryper (better than Roxx Regime) actually came first, then tied to the Bible verse. And then the black and yellow getup.

 
Tick said:
What documentary had a hair metal band (I think Warrant) going into their record label office and instead of seeing their own poster on the wall, saw a grunge poster and realized they’d been passed by?
Here's the clip ... I think that's an episode of VH-1's Behind the Music. That narrator sounds like the same guy.

 
plinko said:
43. Stryper

If you can believe it they are from Orange County.

Their name is a cutesy reference to Jesus' whip scars, as foretold by the prophet Isaiah.  As in, hey, check out the strypes on that guy they're killing  

Look, they are the only Christian rock band of any type anywhere, that I am aware of.. that actually had chops, relative to their secular peers.  

I guess the next best band in this vein, at this time was Bloodgood?

Reason for the Season -- 1984.. Christmas metal while Savatage was still doing Badfinger covers

Soldiers Under Command   slams

Honestly Broke through with an extra drippy ballad of course 

Free

The Way -- Get past goofball lyrics and Oz Fox could play*

Three pretty successful records, the follow up to To Hell With The Devil was more of the same but not as good.  In 1990 they took off the yellow and black, donned leather and denim and tried a more secular approach.  Amy Grant, the other Christian artist with any chops, had some success with this move, albeit without the leather.  

But we all rolled our eyes and that was it for a while.  Nowadays AFAIK they're together and tour and make records in full force.  Because why wouldn't they be?

George Lynch, whore that he is, has made two albums with Michael Sweet in the last ten years as well. 

* Sense a trend... nobody up and down this whole list went anywhere without a damn good git-fiddler.


these guys were around at about the same time and had a "religious" designation IIRC

 
Courtjester said:
Was it Evilgrin who posted a story about them meeting Jani Lane and abandoning him somewhere or am I imagining that? 
Not familiar with the actual story in question, but I'mma go on record to say "Yeah, it was prolly him."

There was a time period in late 90s/early 00's where Jani was a fixture in the downtown Orlando FL club/bar scene.  I lived there back then.  He co-owned one of the bars for a minute and was pretty visible (was pretty much at the height of his "abuses" at that time, IIRC).  Them's EG's stomping grounds, so I'd be absolutely floored if he/Yams/The Ox didn't do SOMETHING to/with Mr. Lane at some point.  It's just, like, math. 

(NFN....I really miss EG in these parts 😞.  Just a really righteous dude.)

 
Courtjester said:
Warrant sort of rocked. I have no idea what Uncle Tom's Cabin was about, but cruising around in my 69 Mustang with that song pumping was good times--good times.
Isn't Uncle Tom's Cabin about someone witnessing crooked cops burying bodies?
Always thought the lyrics were similar in tone to Water's Edge by 7 Mary Three. 

Also thumbs up for Down Boys.  

 
Not familiar with the actual story in question, but I'mma go on record to say "Yeah, it was prolly him."

There was a time period in late 90s/early 00's where Jani was a fixture in the downtown Orlando FL club/bar scene.  I lived there back then.  He co-owned one of the bars for a minute and was pretty visible (was pretty much at the height of his "abuses" at that time, IIRC).  Them's EG's stomping grounds, so I'd be absolutely floored if he/Yams/The Ox didn't do SOMETHING to/with Mr. Lane at some point.  It's just, like, math. 

(NFN....I really miss EG in these parts 😞.  Just a really righteous dude.)
Jani Lane’s Sunset strip. I was there a few times, pretty sure I had fun since I don’t remember much.

 
plinko said:
41. Warrant

Whaaat??? Did I know this??

I also played "clubs" at age 11 under the pseudonym "Mitch Dynamite".  

I also never knew it was Yay-nee Lane. And I was a borderline fan of these guys.

"Warrant" is like "Sheriff" but more specific.  "Warrant" is a terrible band name.  Why not Plain Jani, and stay on as Mitch Dynamite?

32 Pennies
So Damn Pretty

^^^ sorry, these are bangers 

Down Boys

Sometimes She Cries its true buddy

Heaven

so they got pretty huge on all that, went back to the studio and then gave us this big dumb monster

Cherry Pie

as well as
Uncle Tom's Cabin
What?  What is this song about? This blows real bad.

I Saw Red .. .. I don't hate it?

I don't know then some other stuff happened and ultimately things didn't end well for our hero J.  He was a good one though, no bull####.


Warrant at 41? Man I'm getting real curious of your Top 10 here buddy. I loved a lot of warrant and unfortunately never got to see them live

How Jani died in that hotel and listening to the 911 call still pisses me and a lot of other people off because of the incompetence of the people involved. Wasn't confirmed but I talked to someone in the Warrant circle who said if there was more competent help Jani is with us today more then likely. 

 
Courtjester said:
Warrant sort of rocked. I have no idea what Uncle Tom's Cabin was about, but cruising around in my 69 Mustang with that song pumping was good times--good times.

And let's be honest, the only reason any of us liked Cherry Pie was Bobbie Brown. 

Was it Evilgrin who posted a story about them meeting Jani Lane and abandoning him somewhere or am I imagining that? 


She was a bonus for me but I loved Warrants sound and Jani was awesome as a frontman. They didn't have the outlandish looks which is why I think people took them more seriously 

 
DocHolliday said:
Cherry Pie is one of the worst songs ever recorded.   I hope to never hear that song again.  I like Uncle Toms Cabin, Mr Rainmaker, and I Saw Red from the Cherry Pie album. The lyrics are weak in I Sat Red but somehow it works for me. 


Jani hated the song too but because he became more known as the Cherry Pie guy. I don't know it's catchy in a bad way so much so I Like it though. It's still better than the mumble#### they call music today. 

 
Never really thought I'd see any love for Warrant, anywhere, but here we are. 

I tried to listen to that album when it came out. I didn't even like it back then.

I've begun to think about my love of hair metal and where the bands that I like fell on the spectrum of punk-influenced trash. Guess I was always more of a fan of bands that the Dolls influenced in spirit like Hanoi Rocks, who everyone following the thread knows I love.  In L.A. in '86-'87 it was the Guns (both L.A. and N' Roses), and Faster #####cat. Those were the big trio back on the Sunset Strip in '87 and sort of had me enthralled. And Warrant came nowhere near those bands' sound, nor did they have their sort of glam/trash outlook about everything. Those three were really the apex of the Strip at that time, and were undoubtedly kings of that scene, all sharing band members and getting recording contracts and the like. 

Cool memories, this exercise. I'm remembering bands I thought fell short as well as those I thought that rocked. 

 
How Jani died in that hotel and listening to the 911 call still pisses me and a lot of other people off because of the incompetence of the people involved. Wasn't confirmed but I talked to someone in the Warrant circle who said if there was more competent help Jani is with us today more then likely. 
Not so sure about that. He had some serious demons that he never really exercised. If this episode didn't end it I'm pretty sure there would have been another one that would have.

 
Sorry for the intermission folks, I am traveling through the pea soup of eastern Washington. Back on track later today hopefully, and we can talk hair  bands that kill

 
Jani hated the song too but because he became more known as the Cherry Pie guy. I don't know it's catchy in a bad way so much so I Like it though. It's still better than the mumble#### they call music today. 
I read that the album was supposed to be called Uncle Tom’s Cabin.  He resented Cherry Pie as a song and because it relegated Uncle Toms Cabin to secondary.  

 
Wow, search function works!!! EV's story----

Sit back, crack a beer, and enjoy.

One night well, WELL after Warrant's heyday, a friend of mine and I were drinking in a bar in Southampton. On the other side of the bar, someone was being relatively loud and belligerent. Come to find out it's Jani Lane, lead singer of Warrant. Being a little tipsy myself, we engage him in conversation, trying to save the two girls he was "hitting on" (they were horrified.) We figured if we got rid of him, maybe we could slide in. Well, they wanted no part of us either, and fled the scene shortly thereafter, but now we were locked in conversation with a staggering drunk, nearly incoherent Jani Lane. After humoring him for a bit, we attempted to beat a retreat, as he was now obscenely drunk (and still doing shots) and had gone from mildly entertaining to exceedingly annoying. We started for the door and had just gotten outside when Lane comes flying out, babbling about needing a ride home. My buddy has borrowed his rich uncle's Jaguar XJS (rich uncle is the only reason we were in the Hamptons to begin with) and he's afraid Jani is going to yak in it. I'm laughing hysterically, not able to believe what's transpiring. Eventually, we let him in the car and ask him to direct us to where he's staying/living. After about 20 minutes of him pointing in different directions and mumbling (he's now shifting from manic drunk to almost comatose mode) we realize we've gone around in circles. We felt like Spinal Tap in Cleveland when they keep encountering the same janitor over and over. My buddy's looking at me, disgusted, as he's now driving the same roads over and over, probably above the legal limit, in a very expensive car with a vomit risk in the back seat. Finally, he just pulls up in front of a bank and says - "Here you go, dude !!!!" Jani, not realizing where he is, fumbles for the handle and gets out. Before he can process what's happening, my buddy hits the gas, swinging the back door shut, and tears out, leaving the singer from Warrant standing piss drunk in a bank parking lot with his arms extended, palms up. No idea where he is. All I could think about as he shrank in the rear view mirror and we were laughing hysterically was what a great story this would make.

 
Uncle Toms Cabin

Big Talk

Down Boys

I played a lot of Warrant while Fighting Mike Tyson and Glass Joe.  I like them.  They don’t hold up particularly well but they are nostalgia for me.  

 
Here's the clip ... I think that's an episode of VH-1's Behind the Music. That narrator sounds like the same guy.
Doesn’t seem to be Behind the Music (e.g. listen to the narrator on the Queen one). Seems more like one of those cheesy countdown shows, but no matter. Carry on, Jani.
You and massraider are right. I'm pretty sure massraider tabbed the voice of Chris Connelly accurately ... and in 1998, that would've meant something broadcast on MTV. If I had played the entire clip through, I'd have seen the Beavis & Butthead callback.

Warrant was never on VH-1's Behind the Music, and the narrator of that program was Jim Forbes and not Connelly.

 
She was a bonus for me but I loved Warrants sound and Jani was awesome as a frontman. They didn't have the outlandish looks which is why I think people took them more seriously 
Jain was a good front man and could actually sing.   I saw Warrant once in Ohio.   Jani was wasted and doing one of the ballads on an acoustic guitar.   He kept stopping to say how much he loves his fans and how good OH was to him as he was breaking out.   I don’t think he ever finished the song.   I lost interest.  That’s all I remember.   

 
Warrant was never on VH-1's Behind the Music, and the narrator of that program was Jim Forbes and not Connelly.
Yeah, in hindsight Warrant probably wasn’t BTM material. They tended to focus on bigger, long-standing bands or on singers involved in  drunk driving tragedies involving friends (Leif Garrett and Vince Neil/Crue).

 
Wow, search function works!!! EV's story----

Sit back, crack a beer, and enjoy.

One night well, WELL after Warrant's heyday, a friend of mine and I were drinking in a bar in Southampton. On the other side of the bar, someone was being relatively loud and belligerent. Come to find out it's Jani Lane, lead singer of Warrant. Being a little tipsy myself, we engage him in conversation, trying to save the two girls he was "hitting on" (they were horrified.) We figured if we got rid of him, maybe we could slide in. Well, they wanted no part of us either, and fled the scene shortly thereafter, but now we were locked in conversation with a staggering drunk, nearly incoherent Jani Lane. After humoring him for a bit, we attempted to beat a retreat, as he was now obscenely drunk (and still doing shots) and had gone from mildly entertaining to exceedingly annoying. We started for the door and had just gotten outside when Lane comes flying out, babbling about needing a ride home. My buddy has borrowed his rich uncle's Jaguar XJS (rich uncle is the only reason we were in the Hamptons to begin with) and he's afraid Jani is going to yak in it. I'm laughing hysterically, not able to believe what's transpiring. Eventually, we let him in the car and ask him to direct us to where he's staying/living. After about 20 minutes of him pointing in different directions and mumbling (he's now shifting from manic drunk to almost comatose mode) we realize we've gone around in circles. We felt like Spinal Tap in Cleveland when they keep encountering the same janitor over and over. My buddy's looking at me, disgusted, as he's now driving the same roads over and over, probably above the legal limit, in a very expensive car with a vomit risk in the back seat. Finally, he just pulls up in front of a bank and says - "Here you go, dude !!!!" Jani, not realizing where he is, fumbles for the handle and gets out. Before he can process what's happening, my buddy hits the gas, swinging the back door shut, and tears out, leaving the singer from Warrant standing piss drunk in a bank parking lot with his arms extended, palms up. No idea where he is. All I could think about as he shrank in the rear view mirror and we were laughing hysterically was what a great story this would make.
This story needed more Yams.

 
The truly sad part of the whole thing is he posted that story in 2014 and when I saw Warrant, I immediately thought of it. I have trouble remembering important dates, yet I thought of that. My mind is a strange and very odd thing. 
Just shows where your priorities are at.  "EG drunken stories > Anniversary date", etc, etc.

 

Users who are viewing this thread

Back
Top