UGH! "We need to talk" (1 Viewer)

[SHIZNITTTT]

So every now and then I get the "We Need To Talk" from my wife. Well this am I got just that while I was still half asleep. So of course my races a million miles per hour. So I think to myself did I delete my browser history? Have I said something to someone that is offensive? And, then she hits me with, "I feel like you are not doing your fair share around the house." I get this talk about once a year. Usually after she feels taken advantage of from someone, she does some self reflection and all the ways she feels she has been slighted. It always ends with me "NOT DOING MY FAIR SHARE." The most recent incident happened when her friend was on our AT&T plan for the past 8 years on the unlimited plan. Her friend is getting married and switching over to her husband's plan, but she wants to keep her phone number. Well you can't keep the number without taking that line away from us, and us losing that unlimited plan "Grandfathered. Today was the talk again. I just know at this point to be quiet and let her vent. I need to do more cleaning around the house, do more dishes, do more laundry, help out with the kids more, cook more. She starts to tear up and now I feel I like a POS. OMG! It basically sounded like I am a tenant renting out a room at her house.

So to help out more I got on the internet, searched for new fappening leaks, and posted this rant.

 

[eoMMan]

Did you then lay the tile and show her who really wears the pants in the relationship?

 

[TxBuckeye]

Does your wife work?

 

[The General]

Bad way to start the day. For the whole cleaning around the house thing you could look into getting a maid.

We have a service come once every 2 weeks. Don't ever have to clean kitchen, toilet, floors, bathtub, etc. Costs us 80 a visit, never have to get in that argument with wife. Best money I spend.

Good luck!

 

[Cjw_55106]

How often does she take out the garbage, mow the lawn and fix things around the house?

 

[McGarnicle]

#### her, she's lucky you're not banging some skank who works at a tanning salon. Make sure she knows how good she has it. This stuff pisses me off.

 

[Peyton Marino]

that phone bill stuff is pretty messed up.

 

[Johnny Rock]

So are you keeping the Unlimited line? Are there new fappening links?

 

[Yankee23Fan]

This specific talk is always out of bounds and not worthy of discussion with the wife if she is a SAHM. And I mean, literally, do not even engage or pay attention to the "conversation." Your comment about her self reflection is interesting, but allow me MHO on what is really going on in her head. She knows she isn't doing what is expected of her and she is trying to deflect the emotions that causes by blaming you. Because if she can blame you and back down and agree with that blame and do more so that she can do less, then she wasn't wrong and in fact was being taken advantage of.

The whole measurement of who works more crap in marriages is something I have no time for. And it's never ever the real ultimate reason that the subject matter is brought up anyway. There is always - always - something more in depth and real than her just thinking you need to vacuum the living room more.

 

[SHIZNITTTT]

Did you then lay the tile and show her who really wears the pants in the relationship?

It was all I could do to stay awake. She was being loud getting ready for work, leaving lights on, closing the drawers hard. I woke up and she said, "OH, you are up?" oof

 

[SHIZNITTTT]

Does your wife work?

Yeah this is the pisser! She makes about 4 times what I do. She went back to school when the twins were small. I worked my ### off while she was in school, but I have been coasting a little bit of late.

 

[SHIZNITTTT]

Bad way to start the day. For the whole cleaning around the house thing you could look into getting a maid.

We have a service come once every 2 weeks. Don't ever have to clean kitchen, toilet, floors, bathtub, etc. Costs us 80 a visit, never have to get in that argument with wife. Best money I spend.

Good luck!

Yeah, we had a great lady that was coming twice a month. She graduated from college and took another line of work...what a bitych. Must look into a cleaning service again.

 

[SHIZNITTTT]

How often does she take out the garbage, mow the lawn and fix things around the house?

Never, but that doesn't count I guess in her book of "Who has done what lately."

 

[Yankee23Fan]

Does your wife work?

Yeah this is the pisser! She makes about 4 times what I do. She went back to school when the twins were small. I worked my ### off while she was in school, but I have been coasting a little bit of late.

Well then that changes things a great deal in terms of household stuff and division of labor.

 

[SHIZNITTTT]

#### her, she's lucky you're not banging some skank who works at a tanning salon. Make sure she knows how good she has it. This stuff pisses me off.

Good Stuff! I will link her this post. Hopefully we still have that unlimited plan.

 

[SHIZNITTTT]

that phone bill stuff is pretty messed up.

Yeah, we have been friends with this lady for a long time. I think she has been on our plan for over 9 years. She couldn't get her own plan years ago due to bad credit I think. SO my wife allowed her on our plan. She pays her fair share of the bill no problems there. But, in a few months the twins will turn 12 and for their birthday we have told them they could get a phone. We didn't want to lose that unlimited plan.

 

[McGarnicle]

Does your wife work?

Yeah this is the pisser! She makes about 4 times what I do. She went back to school when the twins were small. I worked my ### off while she was in school, but I have been coasting a little bit of late.

I didn't realize this. Sorry, you have to do whatever she says.

 

[SHIZNITTTT]

So are you keeping the Unlimited line? Are there new fappening links?

New stuff daily it looks like, or it is new to me at least. I think links are available at :e:

 

[SHIZNITTTT]

This specific talk is always out of bounds and not worthy of discussion with the wife if she is a SAHM. And I mean, literally, do not even engage or pay attention to the "conversation." Your comment about her self reflection is interesting, but allow me MHO on what is really going on in her head. She knows she isn't doing what is expected of her and she is trying to deflect the emotions that causes by blaming you. Because if she can blame you and back down and agree with that blame and do more so that she can do less, then she wasn't wrong and in fact was being taken advantage of.

The whole measurement of who works more crap in marriages is something I have no time for. And it's never ever the real ultimate reason that the subject matter is brought up anyway. There is always - always - something more in depth and real than her just thinking you need to vacuum the living room more.

100% correct. It is never the real reason "We Need To Talk" she is pissed at her friend and venting/blaming/blowing off her steam on me.

 

[SHIZNITTTT]

Does your wife work?

Yeah this is the pisser! She makes about 4 times what I do. She went back to school when the twins were small. I worked my ### off while she was in school, but I have been coasting a little bit of late.

I didn't realize this. Sorry, you have to do whatever she says.

Yeah, I should stop working. Become her concubine.

 

[Cjw_55106]

Man, if my wife made 4 times what I do, I'd do whatever the #### she wanted.

 

[Al O'Pecia]

"I feel like you are not doing your fair share around the house." I get this talk about once a year.

What are you complaining about? I get that talk every other day.

 

[Patriotsfatboy1]

Man, if my wife made 4 times what I do, I'd do whatever the #### she wanted.

####, I would be happy if my wife made 1/4 of what I make.

 

[SHIZNITTTT]

"I feel like you are not doing your fair share around the house." I get this talk about once a year.

What are you complaining about? I get that talk every other day.

Man it sucks.

 

[shadyridr]

She makes 4x what you do? Lmfao time to start listening to her.

 

[SHIZNITTTT]

She makes 4x what you do? Lmfao time to start listening to her.

At least 4x. I haven't checked lately. I better get off this computer and start dusting.

 

[belljr]

So she's mad that her friend wants to drop her line from your plan? :nutty:

 

[Ned]

Man, if my wife made 4 times what I do, I'd do whatever the #### she wanted.

No ####.

Put on the rubber gloves and get scrubbing, shiz.

 

[johnnycakes]

If you had a traditional Chinese wife you wouldn't have to listen to this crap. Of course, she wouldn't make what your wife makes, either. The deal is you make the money; she takes care of you, the kids, and the house.

 

[eoMMan]

Does your wife work?

Yeah this is the pisser! She makes about 4 times what I do. She went back to school when the twins were small. I worked my ### off while she was in school, but I have been coasting a little bit of late.

Whoa....4 times!?!?! Yeah, either start doing more cleaning around the house and find some way to convince her to hire a cleaning service.

 

[ChiefD]

Does your wife work?

Yeah this is the pisser! She makes about 4 times what I do. She went back to school when the twins were small. I worked my ### off while she was in school, but I have been coasting a little bit of late.

Go in the kitchen and make her a sammich.

 

[NutterButter]

Either you don't make much or you need to start hiring some people to help out.

 

[Al O'Pecia]

"I feel like you are not doing your fair share around the house." I get this talk about once a year.

What are you complaining about? I get that talk every other day.

Man it sucks.

Yes, yes it does suck.

My wife makes no sense with her complaints either. For instance, I was yelled at like I was a child just this morning. I stayed up late to watch last night's games, and promised her I'd do the dishes before I went to bed. I got too sloshed and didn't do the dishes last night so I woke up early to do the dishes before work and before anyone else got up. I was just wrapping up the dishes this morning when my wife came downstairs and instantly started leaning into me about not doing the dishes last night. I explained to her that I was a little too tired to do the dishes at the end of the game last night (I left out the drunk part) so I put the dishes off until the morning knowing full well that I'd wake up early and do the dishes before I left for work and before she could find them and have to do them herself. And "Voila!" they're done!

It didn't matter that I upheld the spirit of my promise to do the dishes so that she didn't have to do them, and it didn't matter that I accomplished this before she usually wakes up or before the kid was awake. I had failed to live up to my promise to do the dishes last night while everyone was asleep. And for that I deserved to be treated like a #####.

I don't even care anymore. She's like a football coach who has lost the team. I see the lips moving, but my mind is in a completely different place.

 

[SHIZNITTTT]

So she's mad that her friend wants to drop her line from your plan? :nutty:

No, she is mad that her friend wants to keep her phone number from our plan. Her friend will cancel our unlimited plan on that line if she keeps the number.

 

[SHIZNITTTT]

Either you don't make much or you need to start hiring some people to help out.

I make myself around 65k a year.

 

[Dentist]

Man, if my wife made 4 times what I do, I'd do whatever the #### she wanted.

Me to... because then I wouldn't have to work.

 

[Dentist]

Either you don't make much or you need to start hiring some people to help out.

I make myself around 65k a year.

What does she do that nets 250-300k?

 

[SHIZNITTTT]

"I feel like you are not doing your fair share around the house." I get this talk about once a year.

What are you complaining about? I get that talk every other day.

Man it sucks.

Yes, yes it does suck.

My wife makes no sense with her complaints either. For instance, I was yelled at like I was a child just this morning. I stayed up late to watch last night's games, and promised her I'd do the dishes before I went to bed. I got too sloshed and didn't do the dishes last night so I woke up early to do the dishes before work and before anyone else got up. I was just wrapping up the dishes this morning when my wife came downstairs and instantly started leaning into me about not doing the dishes last night. I explained to her that I was a little too tired to do the dishes at the end of the game last night (I left out the drunk part) so I put the dishes off until the morning knowing full well that I'd wake up early and do the dishes before I left for work and before she could find them and have to do them herself. And "Voila!" they're done!

It didn't matter that I upheld the spirit of my promise to do the dishes so that she didn't have to do them, and it didn't matter that I accomplished this before she usually wakes up or before the kid was awake. I had failed to live up to my promise to do the dishes last night while everyone was asleep. And for that I deserved to be treated like a #####.

I don't even care anymore. She's like a football coach who has lost the team. I see the lips moving, but my mind is in a completely different place.

She is most likely mad you didn't come to bed with her. She doesn't care about the dishes. It is like cracking a ####### enigma code daily.

 

[belljr]

But you won't have that line anymore anyway.

 

[Dentist]

Does your wife work?

Yeah this is the pisser! She makes about 4 times what I do. She went back to school when the twins were small. I worked my ### off while she was in school, but I have been coasting a little bit of late.

I have a buddy in the same situation... wife makes a lot more money that he did. He did the same thing... supported her in school and everything... but once she started making the dough she walked around like she owned the place and the wife feels like she's "better" than he is.

It's not a recoverable situation.

 

[El Floppo]

The worst four word combo in the entire English language.

 

[SHIZNITTTT]

Either you don't make much or you need to start hiring some people to help out.

I make myself around 65k a year.

What does she do that nets 250-300k?

Works for a private Neonatal Group. That figure is due to OT, and incentives, bonuses.

 

[NutterButter]

Either you don't make much or you need to start hiring some people to help out.

I make myself around 65k a year.

Ok, so you're pulling in like 300K as a fam and you don't have someone to clean the house and your wife is sweating losing a grandfathered unlimited plan?

 

[SHIZNITTTT]

But you won't have that line anymore anyway.

No we will keep the number and the line. If it is not being used, we only pay 10 dollars a month for it.

 

[beer 30]

The whole measurement of who works more crap in marriages is something I have no time for. And it's never ever the real ultimate reason that the subject matter is brought up anyway. There is always - always - something more in depth and real than her just thinking you need to vacuum the living room more.

Same with me when she starts up about this (which is rare but does happen). I just check out and begin the automated response sequence, yea, uh huh, yep, I understand...

Does your wife work?

Yeah this is the pisser! She makes about 4 times what I do. She went back to school when the twins were small. I worked my ### off while she was in school, but I have been coasting a little bit of late.

You should be dressing like Shaq in Shazzam if she asks you to. Get off your lazy ### and make the woman a sammich!

 

[dickey moe]

Does your wife work?

Yeah this is the pisser! She makes about 4 times what I do. She went back to school when the twins were small. I worked my ### off while she was in school, but I have been coasting a little bit of late.

I didn't realize this. Sorry, you have to do whatever she says.

 

[shader]

If you guys are making 300-400k, hire out a daily maid, geez.

 

[dickey moe]

You are a couple who (supposedly) makes over $300k and you can't pay for maid service to put some ease on the situation? I sense a math fail here.

 

[Yankee23Fan]

"I feel like you are not doing your fair share around the house." I get this talk about once a year.

What are you complaining about? I get that talk every other day.

Man it sucks.

Yes, yes it does suck.

My wife makes no sense with her complaints either. For instance, I was yelled at like I was a child just this morning. I stayed up late to watch last night's games, and promised her I'd do the dishes before I went to bed. I got too sloshed and didn't do the dishes last night so I woke up early to do the dishes before work and before anyone else got up. I was just wrapping up the dishes this morning when my wife came downstairs and instantly started leaning into me about not doing the dishes last night. I explained to her that I was a little too tired to do the dishes at the end of the game last night (I left out the drunk part) so I put the dishes off until the morning knowing full well that I'd wake up early and do the dishes before I left for work and before she could find them and have to do them herself. And "Voila!" they're done!

It didn't matter that I upheld the spirit of my promise to do the dishes so that she didn't have to do them, and it didn't matter that I accomplished this before she usually wakes up or before the kid was awake. I had failed to live up to my promise to do the dishes last night while everyone was asleep. And for that I deserved to be treated like a #####.

I don't even care anymore. She's like a football coach who has lost the team. I see the lips moving, but my mind is in a completely different place.

Tell her that this crap will no longer be tolerated and from this point forward if she acts like a child again you will treat her like one.

 

[SHIZNITTTT]

Either you don't make much or you need to start hiring some people to help out.

I make myself around 65k a year.

Ok, so you're pulling in like 300K as a fam and you don't have someone to clean the house and your wife is sweating losing a grandfathered unlimited plan?

This is what we talked about, but it is not the "REASON!" The reason is she is pissed her friend is taking advantage of her. And, she is having displaced anger.