Who knows how much you make? (1 Viewer)

[The Commish]

So, why is it so taboo to talk about salary? Genuine question.

it's one of those topics that doesn't have a right answer like with many controversial religious/political topics.

Me: I make X

You: (in the back of your head of course) "wow, i can't believe he makes that much... WTF" or "wow, he works that hard and makes that little?" it's almost never going to be: "yup, sounds about right

Those are judgments...not answers. But I keep going back to, who cares what others think?

 

[fantasycurse42]

Nobody, in fact my family has no clue... Just my wife. I wish she understood taxes, insurance, 401k, etc. better bc if she thinks I make $10 dollars, she thinks I come home with like $9 dollars.

 

[Zow]

So, why is it so taboo to talk about salary? Genuine question.

it's one of those topics that doesn't have a right answer like with many controversial religious/political topics.

Me: I make X

You: (in the back of your head of course) "wow, i can't believe he makes that much... WTF" or "wow, he works that hard and makes that little?" it's almost never going to be: "yup, sounds about right

You're a dentist?

$150k sounds about right.

 

[Guest]

Nobody. I have an uncle and cousin that always ask though. i think that's kind of weird.

 

[snogger]

I imagine my friends

So does this

 

[dgreen]

So, why is it so taboo to talk about salary? Genuine question.

it's one of those topics that doesn't have a right answer like with many controversial religious/political topics.

Me: I make X

You: (in the back of your head of course) "wow, i can't believe he makes that much... WTF" or "wow, he works that hard and makes that little?" it's almost never going to be: "yup, sounds about right

Those are judgments...not answers. But I keep going back to, who cares what others think?

Lots of people care what others think. Lots of people measure success and worth by money. These aren't new ideas.

 

[Workhorse]

Wife, accountant and boss. That's it.

 

[The Commish]

So, why is it so taboo to talk about salary? Genuine question.

it's one of those topics that doesn't have a right answer like with many controversial religious/political topics.

Me: I make X

You: (in the back of your head of course) "wow, i can't believe he makes that much... WTF" or "wow, he works that hard and makes that little?" it's almost never going to be: "yup, sounds about right

Those are judgments...not answers. But I keep going back to, who cares what others think?

Lots of people care what others think. Lots of people measure success and worth by money. These aren't new ideas.

I know they aren't...just don't make any sense.

 

[Dentist]

if someone asks you your salary... what do you respond with?

value before or after taxes? value before or after 401k/HSA/health insurance deductions?

what if you get a 401k match? is that part of income or not part of income?

perks? benefits?

I mean... like I make X... but my 401k match is significant... i get a company provided cell phone,... how do you put a price on all the fringe benefits?

In addition.. isn't value relative to the amount of work you do also really important?

Like for instance:

Mr. Patent Lawyer makes X and works 70+ hours a week and is always answering/reading e-mails on his phone.... Dentist makes X minus 50K but works 38 hours a week and gets 5 work e-mails a week and has enough free time during his day to be a prolific poster on a popular fantasy football message board so who's really got it better?

I'm more impressed by dollars/hour or dollars relative to effort put out than straight salary.

 

[jamny]

if someone asks you your salary... what do you respond with?

I tell them, "none of your business"

 

[snogger]

Only my wife, she handles all the finances.

I was filling out the credit check form yesterday at the dealership and it asked to fill-in your mortgage payments.. Had to call the wife as I had no idea.. Then had to ask "umm, the bank holds our mortgage.. right? "

 

[Dentist]

So, why is it so taboo to talk about salary? Genuine question.

it's one of those topics that doesn't have a right answer like with many controversial religious/political topics.

Me: I make X

You: (in the back of your head of course) "wow, i can't believe he makes that much... WTF" or "wow, he works that hard and makes that little?" it's almost never going to be: "yup, sounds about right

Those are judgments...not answers. But I keep going back to, who cares what others think?

Everyone cares what others think. Even people who say they don't care about what others think, to a certain but probably lesser extent still care more than they would care to admit about what other people think.

Most of the reason people do anything in their life is because they care how other people think.

Otherwise we'd all be super fat, wear sweat pants/shorts all the time, play video games until our eyes bled, discuss taboo topics without any worry of being judged, and be willing to snap one off in public.

 

[snogger]

if someone asks you your salary... what do you respond with?

I tell them, "none of your business"

 

[the moops]

so, how much does everyone make?

 

[sbonomo]

This is a good question. I will generally tell people if they ask. I have a few buddies that i keep tabs with to make sure that i am still making market. My wife has no clue (like dentist she thinks we are broke). I am wondering, just as an experiment, if you make over $100K are you more likely to let people know? What is the impressive number, i saw $150K thrown out there? I would think the $500K+ is the impressive side but i also live in So Cal so it will probabaly vary by city size.

 

[Dentist]

if someone asks you your salary... what do you respond with?

I tell them, "none of your business"

assuming you choose to respond with an honest answer

 

[encaitar]

if someone asks you your salary... what do you respond with?

I tell them, "none of your business"

"Not as much as I'd like, but enough to keep me working there."

 

[dgreen]

so, how much does everyone make?

Everyone? That's a big number. Somewhere in the trillions.

 

[Dentist]

So, why is it so taboo to talk about salary? Genuine question.

it's one of those topics that doesn't have a right answer like with many controversial religious/political topics.

Me: I make X

You: (in the back of your head of course) "wow, i can't believe he makes that much... WTF" or "wow, he works that hard and makes that little?" it's almost never going to be: "yup, sounds about right

You're a dentist?

$150k sounds about right.

So then you'd be impressed as hell by my buddy who pulls in 400+ on 3.5 days of work a week.

150 is low... even a slacker like me beats that on regular income before I start adding in the countless perks and benefits of being in the ownership group of a small business.

 

[Zow]

So, why is it so taboo to talk about salary? Genuine question.

it's one of those topics that doesn't have a right answer like with many controversial religious/political topics.

Me: I make X

You: (in the back of your head of course) "wow, i can't believe he makes that much... WTF" or "wow, he works that hard and makes that little?" it's almost never going to be: "yup, sounds about right

You're a dentist?

$150k sounds about right.

So then you'd be impressed as hell by my buddy who pulls in 400+ on 3.5 days of work a week.

150 is low... even a slacker like me beats that on regular income before I start adding in the countless perks and benefits of being in the ownership group of a small business.

I was kidding/riling you up.

 

[fantasycurse42]

This is a good question. I will generally tell people if they ask. I have a few buddies that i keep tabs with to make sure that i am still making market. My wife has no clue (like dentist she thinks we are broke). I am wondering, just as an experiment, if you make over $100K are you more likely to let people know? What is the impressive number, i saw $150K thrown out there? I would think the $500K+ is the impressive side but i also live in So Cal so it will probabaly vary by city size.

$500k is impressive under most circumstances and locations. There are also a lot of variances... For instance, in my industry there are a ton of startups and if your company goes IPO, you can make 5-10x or more of your typical income in one specific year.

 

[Steve Tasker]

I don't know that it's really taboo to talk about salary as opposed to other far-more-taboo topics, but it's certainly a little tacky.

If someone blabs about his/her salary, generally I wonder what insecurity they're trying to cover.

 

[the moops]

150 is low...

yea, it's only 3 times the median income

 

[Keerock]

so, how much does everyone make?

A good bowlful every day or two...

 

[dgreen]

150 is low...

yea, it's only 3 times the median income

For dentists?

 

[dgreen]

Bureau of Labor Statistics says $150,000 is median for dentists.

 

[johnnycakes]

Bureau of Labor Statistics says $150,000 is median for dentists.

From salary.com specifically for KCMO. Check the grid below the pie chart.

 

[Bob Loblaw]

Anyone who wants to know: government employee.

Wife doesn't know my annual gross. She does know that every month I make enough to pay for our mortgage, utilities, credit card (in full, no balances carried over), groceries, beers, kids' expenses, gas, eating out, hosting playdates, social gatherings, internet, cable, land line phone, wireless phone, clothes, shoes, toiletries, gifts for our kids' friends' birthdays, haircuts, etc. and enough to put in savings for property taxes, homeowner's insurance, car maintenance, vacation fund, DMV renewals, cord blood registry, safe deposit box, Christmas fund, retirement funds. But do I get credit for any of that?

 

[Fennis]

if someone asks you your salary... what do you respond with?

I tell them, "none of your business"

assuming you choose to respond with an honest answer

gross.

of course its way different for self employed people.

 

[johnnycakes]

Anyone who wants to know: government employee.

Wife doesn't know my annual gross. She does know that every month I make enough to pay for our mortgage, utilities, credit card (in full, no balances carried over), groceries, beers, kids' expenses, gas, eating out, hosting playdates, social gatherings, internet, cable, land line phone, wireless phone, clothes, shoes, toiletries, gifts for our kids' friends' birthdays, haircuts, etc. and enough to put in savings for property taxes, homeowner's insurance, car maintenance, vacation fund, DMV renewals, cord blood registry, safe deposit box, Christmas fund, retirement funds. But do I get credit for any of that?

No. get back to work, slacker.

 

[Dentist]

Bureau of Labor Statistics says $150,000 is median for dentists.

From salary.com specifically for KCMO. Check the grid below the pie chart.

what do you know... huh... i wonder how accurate that is.

I've always thought i was on the lower end of dentists even within my area with the way people talk and what they drive and where they live and what not.

I guess dentists aren't much different than other people in society living at or above their means.

on the other hand I know several dentist - dentist couples or dentist - hygienist (decent paying job) or dentist - some other decent earning job and then the combined income is pretty huge compared to my dentist - stay at home mom combo

 

[StrikeS2k]

My dad, who is my employer. Nobody else. My wife knows a general figure which is not quite accurate. That's it.

I imagine my friends and outside family think I earn less than I do, but we don't ever discuss it. I have one friend who asks from time to time but I never answer.

This explains a LOT to me.

 

[Jobber]

So, why is it so taboo to talk about salary? Genuine question.

it's one of those topics that doesn't have a right answer like with many controversial religious/political topics.

Me: I make X

You: (in the back of your head of course) "wow, i can't believe he makes that much... WTF" or "wow, he works that hard and makes that little?" it's almost never going to be: "yup, sounds about right

Those are judgments...not answers. But I keep going back to, who cares what others think?

It's not that I care about what other people think, it's the risk that others will act or think differently around you that's the problem. This kind of stuff can have a subtle effect on relationships.

 

[Dentist]

So, why is it so taboo to talk about salary? Genuine question.

it's one of those topics that doesn't have a right answer like with many controversial religious/political topics.

Me: I make X

You: (in the back of your head of course) "wow, i can't believe he makes that much... WTF" or "wow, he works that hard and makes that little?" it's almost never going to be: "yup, sounds about right

Those are judgments...not answers. But I keep going back to, who cares what others think?

It's not that I care about what other people think, it's the risk that others will act or think differently around you that's the problem. This kind of stuff can have a subtle effect on relationships.

It's like that episode of Seinfeld where Kramer sees one of Jerry's checkstubs and does a typical Kramer "whoo-wee-whooo" with his head shaking and states: "I'm not sure we can be friends anymore."

Then eliane sees the paystub and suddenly starts heavily flirting with Jerry again

I believe the episode is "the cadillac"

 

[The Noid]

how do spouses not know what each other make?

I do the taxes, so my wife never sees a W-2, so she only has a general idea. I should say "had" because it came up for some reason a few months back and what she thought I made (salary only) was about 20% less than the actual number (I could have started hiding money!)

She just knows the bills get paid and every once in awhile will page through the checkbook, but she never tried to figure out my gross using the direct deposit net or anything like that.

 

[ChiefD]

so, how much does everyone make?

This has been a down year. Probably 275k this year.

 

[AAABatteries]

Who posted in: Who knows how much you make?

Member name Posts

Dentist 9

There was a 0% chance that Dentist wasn't the poster with the most posts in this thread. I would have bet my entire 401k and disposable income on it.

 

[The Commish]

So, why is it so taboo to talk about salary? Genuine question.

it's one of those topics that doesn't have a right answer like with many controversial religious/political topics.

Me: I make X

You: (in the back of your head of course) "wow, i can't believe he makes that much... WTF" or "wow, he works that hard and makes that little?" it's almost never going to be: "yup, sounds about right

Those are judgments...not answers. But I keep going back to, who cares what others think?

Everyone cares what others think. Even people who say they don't care about what others think, to a certain but probably lesser extent still care more than they would care to admit about what other people think.

Most of the reason people do anything in their life is because they care how other people think.

Otherwise we'd all be super fat, wear sweat pants/shorts all the time, play video games until our eyes bled, discuss taboo topics without any worry of being judged, and be willing to snap one off in public.

ummmmmm......no

 

[Spike]

Nobody knows except my wife.

This.

 

[The Commish]

So, why is it so taboo to talk about salary? Genuine question.

it's one of those topics that doesn't have a right answer like with many controversial religious/political topics.

Me: I make X

You: (in the back of your head of course) "wow, i can't believe he makes that much... WTF" or "wow, he works that hard and makes that little?" it's almost never going to be: "yup, sounds about right

Those are judgments...not answers. But I keep going back to, who cares what others think?

It's not that I care about what other people think, it's the risk that others will act or think differently around you that's the problem. This kind of stuff can have a subtle effect on relationships.

I don't question this at all, other than to ask why one hangs out with people that would allow it to be an issue?

 

[jamny]

Nobody knows except my wife.

This.

How does ChiefD's wife know your salary?

 

[Tiger Fan]

So, why is it so taboo to talk about salary? Genuine question.

it's one of those topics that doesn't have a right answer like with many controversial religious/political topics.

Me: I make X

You: (in the back of your head of course) "wow, i can't believe he makes that much... WTF" or "wow, he works that hard and makes that little?" it's almost never going to be: "yup, sounds about right

Those are judgments...not answers. But I keep going back to, who cares what others think?

It's not that I care about what other people think, it's the risk that others will act or think differently around you that's the problem. This kind of stuff can have a subtle effect on relationships.

It's like that episode of Seinfeld where Kramer sees one of Jerry's checkstubs and does a typical Kramer "whoo-wee-whooo" with his head shaking and states: "I'm not sure we can be friends anymore."

Then eliane sees the paystub and suddenly starts heavily flirting with Jerry again

I believe the episode is "the cadillac"

While I have no way of knowing for sure, I think I'm at the higher end of the regular network of friends that I hang with. I never talk at all, b/c frankly I hate snobbery, penis size comparison, etc. We had a guy in the extended network who took a job at my company and all he does is talk about money and how well he's doing. He's now the butt of all conversation and people can't stand being around him.

humblebrag?

 

[the moops]

how do spouses not know what each other make?

I do the taxes, so my wife never sees a W-2, so she only has a general idea. I should say "had" because it came up for some reason a few months back and what she thought I made (salary only) was about 20% less than the actual number (I could have started hiding money!)

She just knows the bills get paid and every once in awhile will page through the checkbook, but she never tried to figure out my gross using the direct deposit net or anything like that.

you've never discussed your salary with her though? like when looking for a raise or searching for a new job or figuring out how large a mortgage you can afford?

 

[Brony]

My wife only. Though she thinks I make 74,550. Jokes on her. I really earn 75,550

 

[Cliff Clavin]

Who posted in: Who knows how much you make?

Member name Posts

Dentist 9

There was a 0% chance that Dentist wasn't the poster with the most posts in this thread. I would have bet my entire 401k and disposable income on it.

That's a lot of investable dollars.

 

[Bogart]

My boss and the co-worker that was in my interview. That's it. And I hate the fact that my coworker knows.

 

[sbonomo]

My wife only. Though she thinks I make 74,550. Jokes on her. I really earn 75,550

You have got to have hour stash for supporting poor out of work college students right.

 

[James Daulton]

Don't we share enough with the world already? Can't at least our salaries, bowl movements, and dot counts be private (to irl friends/family I mean, not ifriends).

 

[Cjw_55106]

I would assume my wife would guess about 20% less than I actually make. No one else knows.

I guess it just doesn't get brought up.

 

[Jobber]

So, why is it so taboo to talk about salary? Genuine question.

it's one of those topics that doesn't have a right answer like with many controversial religious/political topics.

Me: I make X

You: (in the back of your head of course) "wow, i can't believe he makes that much... WTF" or "wow, he works that hard and makes that little?" it's almost never going to be: "yup, sounds about right

Those are judgments...not answers. But I keep going back to, who cares what others think?

It's not that I care about what other people think, it's the risk that others will act or think differently around you that's the problem. This kind of stuff can have a subtle effect on relationships.

I don't question this at all, other than to ask why one hangs out with people that would allow it to be an issue?

Well, you can't hang out with anyone then. It's human nature.