What's new
Fantasy Football - Footballguys Forums

This is a sample guest message. Register a free account today to become a member! Once signed in, you'll be able to participate on this site by adding your own topics and posts, as well as connect with other members through your own private inbox!

Wooing my neighbor: I came. I hugged. I wooed. Now moving on. (1 Viewer)

guitarmonkiy said:
Louisiana
Click to expand...
NO suburbs or far away from there?

Cause last time I was in NO there was a parade of trans folks in S&M fetish gear.  Seems like not a city where you ask for hug permission.  However, outside of that area, there is that southern sensibility thing that I do not relate to at all.  Maybe this is more normal of a pace than it would be up in the DC area.

 
(HULK) said:
NO suburbs or far away from there?

Cause last time I was in NO there was a parade of trans folks in S&M fetish gear.  Seems like not a city where you ask for hug permission.  However, outside of that area, there is that southern sensibility thing that I do not relate to at all.  Maybe this is more normal of a pace than it would be up in the DC area.
Click to expand...
North Louisiana.  Not really near NO.

 
(HULK) said:
NO suburbs or far away from there?

Cause last time I was in NO there was a parade of trans folks in S&M fetish gear.  Seems like not a city where you ask for hug permission.  However, outside of that area, there is that southern sensibility thing that I do not relate to at all.  Maybe this is more normal of a pace than it would be up in the DC area.
Click to expand...
It's North Louisiana.  Duck Dynasty area.

 
mr roboto said:
She's still married. They are neighbors. They are single parents. They just started hanging out. She's clearly interested. She also clearly knows he's interested. 

Let it develop. Bad for thread entertainment, great for our hero's chances. 
Click to expand...
I don't necessarily agree with everything you've stated here.  Again, it was a different era and no kids when I was single, but there is a window to express interest in dating, and it closes pretty quickly.

 
FBG is a touchdown only league.  Doesn't matter many yards you throw for, or how many rushing/receiving yards you get!  Did you score a TD or not?  Somewhere in your neighborhood is a ####### Marcus Allen type.  You are going to do all the heavy lifting and get down to 2 yard line, and then Marcus is going to come in for the easy score.  Do you have an outfit picked out for hug? 

 
Her text is a very good thing...I'd replace hug with #### and it makes perfect sense in context.  The "terrible judgment" phrase is about trying not to appear too slutty.  

I'd probably text back something along the lines of "It's not the most inappropriate thing I could think of".  

Either that, or "Not at all, that's what friends are for", then invite one of your female friends over to your house and make sure she sees.  Since she's into you already, it will probably drive her crazy and be good entertainment for this thread.

 
(HULK) said:
NO suburbs or far away from there?

Cause last time I was in NO there was a parade of trans folks in S&M fetish gear.  Seems like not a city where you ask for hug permission.  However, outside of that area, there is that southern sensibility thing that I do not relate to at all.  Maybe this is more normal of a pace than it would be up in the DC area.
Click to expand...
I would imagine most parts of Louisiana are quite different than DC

 
worrierking said:
Meanwhile over at the Purse forum FFA....

Mona Lisa Vito:  So I sent him a text that asked if a hug was appropriate!  I felt so liberated!

Gianmarcita: Wooo! Did you shave your legs first in case he came running over? 

SWC-section: Next thing he'll be asking you to see a movie like A Few Good Men, you can take that to the mall, missy.

Evil Woman:  This thread is going nowhere.  Mr. Matching Saints hat and shirt is clearly not interested.  You blew it.  New Mexico Naomi would have slipped the kids a Benadryl and serviced him at the BBQ.

PurseCurse:  Yes, I agree.  You blew it with the baggage.  Might as well head over to the "when do you call it a handbag thread."
Click to expand...
:lmao:

 
My two cents on the text, she used the words terrible judgment because she is having trouble reading you.  She may not know what she wants either, but she can't tell if you're just looking to be friends or possibly something more than that.  The "terrible judgment" comment is her way of covering her bases, because if you're into her romantically, obviously you won't mind, but if you're only into her as a friend, you'll view it as a friend who's down and just needs a hug.  I don't think she would have phrased it that way if (1) she were totally disinterested in you romantically or (2) you had established yourself as either a friend or possible romantic partner.  Maybe I'm just parsing words too much.

 
Bull Dozier said:
My two cents, she has some hesitancy for moving things forward too quickly.  Either because of the divorce not being finalized, not sure about getting romantic with a neighbor, not wanting to rush right into a relationship straight out of a divorce, etc.  But, without a doubt she is interested in more than coffee.
Click to expand...
This. They're on the exact same page: cautiously feeling things out due to the overall situation, but so far, so good. Our hero has played it perfectly thus far, considering his priorities.

 
Nathan R. Jessep said:
BREAKING

I'll give a little backstory

In texting earlier today, after the coffee meetup, I mentioned that she looked like she could use a hug after we had that rather heavy talk, but due to the nature of the conversation, I wasn't sure if that would be appreciated or not. Sounds lame I'm sure, but we've texted a good bit back and forth since I got her number, so between that and the face to face time, I have gotten a good feeling of her personality, and besides that, what I told her was absolutely the truth. And I was again seeing how she might respond to this offering. She kind of laughed it off but did agree that yeah it was some serious conversation and yeah I was probably correct about her needing a hug.  So we go back to bantering about random stuff for the rest of the day.

We both got home late this evening, but were still texting a bit here and there throughout the evening. She texts me, completely off topic of what we had been discussing: "if at some point, out of terrible judgment, I wanted a hug, would that be completely inappropriate?" 

I'll leave it right here, for the experts to weigh in... will tell you what actually happened later (probably in the morning)
Click to expand...
Bam. Colonel, you've been approved for a flyby. 

 
bucs4life_99 said:
Her text is a very good thing...I'd replace hug with #### and it makes perfect sense in context.  The "terrible judgment" phrase is about trying not to appear too slutty.  

I'd probably text back something along the lines of "It's not the most inappropriate thing I could think of".  

Either that, or "Not at all, that's what friends are for", then invite one of your female friends over to your house and make sure she sees.  Since she's into you already, it will probably drive her crazy and be good entertainment for this thread.
Click to expand...
But is it possible her "hug" really means hug and she simply wants to be friends?

I agree with the posters suggesting he needs to be more direct and make a move (ie ask for a date with no kids).  Or go mia for a little bit.

 
eoMMan said:
But is it possible her "hug" really means hug and she simply wants to be friends?

I agree with the posters suggesting he needs to be more direct and make a move (ie ask for a date with no kids).  Or go mia for a little bit.
Click to expand...
In and of itself maybe but adding in the against terrible judgment and she's insinuating more imo. Nobody thinks a simple hug is terrible judgment unless its just a starting point.

 
fruity pebbles said:
In and of itself maybe but adding in the against terrible judgment and she's insinuating more imo. Nobody thinks a simple hug is terrible judgment unless its just a starting point.
Click to expand...
:goodposting:

If she was just in full-blown friend mode, she'd just go in for the hug without any thought, because there would be no repercussions. The fact that she asked means that she's well aware of the sexual tension / mutual attraction.

 
I think our hero needs to take the line that terrible judgment relates to banging the neighbor, and go from there.  Treat it as a given that you are on the same page about ####ting where you eat.  

By claiming to have the same qualms, and assessing them in some sort of fashion, he gives her permission to ignore the potential consequences. And by offering to take it slow he comes across as sensitive and caring.  This will set the hook, and you'll be in the promised land within a week.

 
Nathan R. Jessep said:
We both got home late this evening, but were still texting a bit here and there throughout the evening. She texts me, completely off topic of what we had been discussing: "if at some point, out of terrible judgment, I wanted a hug, would that be completely inappropriate?" 
Click to expand...
:thumbup:  KInda hard to #### this one up... IMO she's hinting that she's ready for (or even wanting) you to touch her. You're getting a green light. You passed the background check stage. Well played with the "could use a hug" angle if you were apprehensive based on the vibe of the conversation.

Curious to hear the outcome. 

 
Again - off dating scene for 20 years - but that was basically an invitation for sex wasn't it?  Women don't touch or even think about touching men that repulse them.  And a hug is intimate.  

 
Response should have been, "I'll be over to hug you after the kids are in bed.  Beware, I tend to hug people until they can't walk in the morning".

 
Steve Tasker said:
My two cents on the text, she used the words terrible judgment because she is having trouble reading you.  She may not know what she wants either, but she can't tell if you're just looking to be friends or possibly something more than that.  The "terrible judgment" comment is her way of covering her bases, because if you're into her romantically, obviously you won't mind, but if you're only into her as a friend, you'll view it as a friend who's down and just needs a hug.  I don't think she would have phrased it that way if (1) she were totally disinterested in you romantically or (2) you had established yourself as either a friend or possible romantic partner.  Maybe I'm just parsing words too much.
Click to expand...
Well said here, Tasker. She's got her guard up because she's not sure what you're looking for yet... and you're her neighbor. Like several of us have been saying... very nicely done so far, but it's time to go ahead and dial the "romance" factor up a bit so she knows what you want. She's ready to proceed... but isn't sure if you are.  

fruity pebbles said:
Also since she brought it up much later and out of the blue, she's was thinking about that "hug" all day. Thats not friend stuff.
Click to expand...
:goodposting:

 
heckmanm said:
worrierking said:
Meanwhile over at the Purse forum FFA....

Mona Lisa Vito:  So I sent him a text that asked if a hug was appropriate!  I felt so liberated!

Gianmarcita: Wooo! Did you shave your legs first in case he came running over? 

Ms. SWC: Next thing he'll be asking you to see a movie like A Few Good Men, you can take that to the mall, missy.

Evil Woman:  This thread is going nowhere.  Mr. Matching Saints hat and shirt is clearly not interested.  You blew it.  New Mexico Naomi would have slipped the kids a Benadryl and serviced him at the BBQ.

PurseCurse:  Yes, I agree.  You blew it with the baggage.  Might as well head over to the "when do you call it a handbag thread."
Click to expand...
:golfclap:
Click to expand...
"you can take that to the mall missy" 

:lmao:

 
Yankee23Fan said:
Again - off dating scene for 20 years - but that was basically an invitation for sex wasn't it?  Women don't touch or even think about touching men that repulse them.  And a hug is intimate.  
Click to expand...
Good point but I think it depends on the woman in question. A woman who is a tease and enjoys toying with guys will let a hug be a hug just to mess with them. 

So far, this doesn't sound at all like that to me.

 
There are a few people here incapable of reading subtext.  The door is wide open here if he didn't blow it with the return text.  He really didn't need to answer with any more than "Of course not."

 
Evilgrin 72 said:
There are a few people here incapable of reading subtext.  The door is wide open here if he didn't blow it with the return text.  He really didn't need to answer with any more than "Of course not."
Click to expand...
Exactly.  And the door isn't the only thing that's wide open if you know what I'm saying.

 
Evilgrin 72 said:
He's been up all night training (read : masturbating furiously.)  Give the guy an hour to sleep and rest his forearms for Christ's sake.
Click to expand...
He's been up all night picking out his outfit for today.  Give the guy an hour to rearrange his closet for Pete's sake.

 
Another point in favor the direct approach:  This is your neighbor.  Right now, you can ask her out and if she declines, it will be something you guys can laugh about a month later.  If you wait much longer, it becomes different.  All of the environmental pressure is pushing towards friendship (the fact your kids know each other, that you live on the same street, etc).  It is WAY LESS COMPLICATED to just be friends.  For a single momma, less complicated will often win out over other stuff.

 
"A hug, why that would be swell!  However, I feel since you were so honest with me, I feel I need to be honest with you.  After you blah, blah, blahed honesty for 2.25 hours over coffee, I went to the bar for a few mind erasers.  That lead to me to the bottom of a bottle of Colonel Kwik-E-Mart's Kentucky Bourbon.  Yadda, yadda, yadda, I woke up this evening on the floor of  the pool room at the bowling alley covered in boy juice. Hug still cool?"

 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

scorchy
Any banking guys that can offer solutions to a vexing issue?
Replies
31
Views
555
Mrs. Rannous
Mrs. Rannous
DJackson10
How would you solve this Issue? Neighbor keeps dogs off lease and they run around and do their business on other neighbors property.
Replies
38
Views
1K
DJackson10
DJackson10
CletiusMaximus
Setting up a new Windows Laptop for my Daughter
Replies
2
Views
190
Osaurus
Osaurus

Users who are viewing this thread

Total: 1 (members: 0, guests: 1)
Back
Top