Jump to content
Fantasy Football - Footballguys Forums

Jorts: Reloaded


BGP

Recommended Posts

Only possible way is if you have an old pair of baggy jeans and you cut them off at the knee...and they you only wear these things to do yardwork or painting.

x
Please explain...
sorry, didn't see the "only wear doing yardwork or painting"......even though I still would never wear jorts when doing these things
Link to comment
Share on other sites

:shrug: I live in NYC. And by my count yesterday more people were wearing jean shorts than not.

Were they tourists?
I counted when I went food shopping at the supermarket in Staten Island. So no, none of them were tourists.
AHA! BIG difference between Staten Island and Manhattan. I think most thought when you said NYC, you meant Manhattan.
:goodposting:

:lmao: As far as NYC goes, Staten Island is the deep South.

:rolleyes: Staten Island is basically Brooklyn now
:lmao: Yeah... ok. :lmao:
:rolleyes: You clearly have no clue what you are talking about. 75% of people in Staten Island are Italian Americans from Brooklyn including me.
:lmao: Yeah... ok. :lmao:

Saying "Staten Island is basically Brooklyn" does not equal saying "Most of the residents of Staten Island came from Brooklyn" (not sure what the Italian American thing has to do with it?). And for the record- I have absolutely nothing against Staten Island.

Brooklyn has undergone a renaissance in the last 10 years. Schools, Culture, Restaurnants, Bars, Housing. Probably the trendiest place in the country with all of the young, just out of college crowd moving there due to more affordable housing than Manhattan. If somebody brings up Brooklyn and says their town is basically the same- those are the things that come to mind, at least for me. And Staten Island doesn't suggest those kind of traits, IMO. Affordable housing, yes- the rest, not so much. If you were to say Queens, mebbe...

And besides, all you have to is look around and smell the jorts- should tell you things are rolling a little different on the Island.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Next time its nice outside (and I dont goto the gym) I will goto the park by NYU and count the shorts men wear and break it down.

And be sure to ask what part of Eastern Europe they're from-or whether they're from PR or the DR. Nothing wrong with either of those demographics, just saying they're a jort-happy kind of crew...
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I also need to clarify something: Jorts were never cool. There was a period of time (many years ago), where they became acceptable in the mainstream, but they were never cool. In fact, quite the opposite. Since that time, the fact that they are so totally lame has become well accepted by the masses, though there are still hold outs (it seems).

There will probably be another time when they are once again deemed fashionable by a larger portion of society, but they will be wrong.

And, for the record, I have never owned a pair of jorts. I did wear cut off jeans shorts in the 70s when I was a kid, but that is a different matter.

Both of our sons have had jorts, but only as toddlers.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Only possible way is if you have an old pair of baggy jeans and you cut them off at the knee...and they you only wear these things to do yardwork or painting.

x
Please explain...
sorry, didn't see the "only wear doing yardwork or painting"......even though I still would never wear jorts when doing these things
Saw a guy on CNN today who got struck by lightening while working in his backyard. They showed the damage that was done to his legs, arms and JORTS! :shrug: ... Poor bastard was probably thinking exactly like you, "nothing wrong with wearing jorts to do yardwork". Now here he is plastered all over CNN with his jorts. Dont be "that guy".
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Only possible way is if you have an old pair of baggy jeans and you cut them off at the knee...and they you only wear these things to do yardwork or painting.

x
Please explain...
sorry, didn't see the "only wear doing yardwork or painting"......even though I still would never wear jorts when doing these things
Saw a guy on CNN today who got struck by lightening while working in his backyard. They showed the damage that was done to his legs, arms and JORTS! :shrug: ... Poor bastard was probably thinking exactly like you, "nothing wrong with wearing jorts to do yardwork". Now here he is plastered all over CNN with his jorts. Dont be "that guy".
This was Mother Nature telling him something. Keep wearing them if you dare.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Dad of a jort-wearing four year old checking in. He's currently rotating two pairs that were handed down to him by his cousin - the cheesy little fella won't wear anything else. :goodposting:

Is your son a middle aged Polish man with a moustache?
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I did a little survey this evening while at my daughter's softball game.

Of the 11 men that I observed:

2 - Basketball Shorts (myself included)

5 - Cargo Shorts

2 - Dockers like Golf Shorts

1 - Jorts that were big & baggy like cargo shorts

1 - Straight up redneck Jorts (This is the guy that was yelling at the players and coaches from the stands and had a Budweiser T-shirt with cut off sleeves.)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Took the kids for ice cream last night. Saw 20 or so males college age to 50-something. ZERO jorts sighted. There was one cute young girl in a jirt. Is this acceptable?

Mini-jirt?
semi-short but not mini
In that case- UNacceptable. :popcorn:
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Definition of jorts in the urban dictionary.

Jean shorts. Worn mostly by children and douchebags. Jorts are perhaps the easiest way to recognize people you will not like. If you wear jorts, you probably don't talk to girls. The term "jorts" does not apply to jean shorts worn by black people, as those are entirely acceptable.

Of course.Good god, what took so long?
Link to comment
Share on other sites

More jort observations:Just got back from picking up my mom at the airport and saw four jort-wearing men.One was with a woman.One had a mullet.One had a skullet.One was wearing a t-shirt with a donkey on it that read "I'm a smart one."

:lmao::nerd:<_<
Link to comment
Share on other sites

i can confirm that jorts are quite popular among young black men. as well as, being serious here, capri-pant-type-shorts.:mellow:

Black guys may get an exemption on jorts, very similar to the one they enjoy on mustaches.
:(And alligator-skin shoes, and velour sweatsuits, and a whole bunch of other stuff that white people cannot, under any circumstances, pull off.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Saw a few pairs at the Phils game (Citizens) the other night. Didn't take a good enough informal count cause it didn't occur to me until I saw a couple pairs. I think a game would yield more Jorts than the average function. Jorts and Jersey combo or Jorts and Jersey T-shirt combo seems to be a somehwat common look. Going to the Yankees/Mets game tomorrow at Yankee Stadium. Will report findings.

Edited by koby925
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Dad of a jort-wearing four year old checking in. He's currently rotating two pairs that were handed down to him by his cousin - the cheesy little fella won't wear anything else. :excited:

Is your son a middle aged Polish man with a moustache?
:mellow:this is seriously one of the funniest threads here in a while.:(
Link to comment
Share on other sites

FBGs has opened my eyes. i'm giving my one last pair of jorts to goodwill tomorrow morning.

:mellow:Once again, the FFA has a positive impact on society.Well done, gentlemen.Although burning them would probably be the shark move to remove them from society all together, can't fault giving something too the poor.Plus, they could end up on some smartass kid dressing as a ######## for Halloween.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

FBGs has opened my eyes. i'm giving my one last pair of jorts to goodwill tomorrow morning.

What a coincidence! I'm headed to the Goodwill tomorrow to do some jort shopping. Well, that and to flirt with the cashier.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 1 month later...

Just to keep this thread alive, here's a new one.

My office is in a community center that rents rooms to outside groups for meetings. Today, in the room next to my office is the monthly real estate meeting for the county RE association. That in itself is entertaining, due to the diversity of the county I live in. Some agents that think they are high powered brokers that dress and act the part, regular guy brokers in khakis/polo, rural property brokers in jeans and boots, and the oddball brokers in shorts, holey pants, T-shirts, etc.

One of the oddball guys is in a pastel striped polo and jorts. Not the urban, baggy jorts, but the Levi type. 3-4" above the knee and tight to the leg, you know the style. Here's the kicker--the jorts are half blue denim and half black denim. Not top to bottom, which would be really cool, but one leg faded blue, the other non-faded black. I had to do a double take to make sure I was seeing what I thought I was seeing.

Thanks for reading, now back to your regularly scheduled Michael Vick updates.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just to keep this thread alive, here's a new one.

My office is in a community center that rents rooms to outside groups for meetings. Today, in the room next to my office is the monthly real estate meeting for the county RE association. That in itself is entertaining, due to the diversity of the county I live in. Some agents that think they are high powered brokers that dress and act the part, regular guy brokers in khakis/polo, rural property brokers in jeans and boots, and the oddball brokers in shorts, holey pants, T-shirts, etc.

One of the oddball guys is in a pastel striped polo and jorts. Not the urban, baggy jorts, but the Levi type. 3-4" above the knee and tight to the leg, you know the style. Here's the kicker--the jorts are half blue denim and half black denim. Not top to bottom, which would be really cool, but one leg faded blue, the other non-faded black. I had to do a double take to make sure I was seeing what I thought I was seeing.

Thanks for reading, now back to your regularly scheduled Michael Vick updates.

:goodposting:

Half jorts, half blorts?! Awesome.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just to keep this thread alive, here's a new one.

My office is in a community center that rents rooms to outside groups for meetings. Today, in the room next to my office is the monthly real estate meeting for the county RE association. That in itself is entertaining, due to the diversity of the county I live in. Some agents that think they are high powered brokers that dress and act the part, regular guy brokers in khakis/polo, rural property brokers in jeans and boots, and the oddball brokers in shorts, holey pants, T-shirts, etc.

One of the oddball guys is in a pastel striped polo and jorts. Not the urban, baggy jorts, but the Levi type. 3-4" above the knee and tight to the leg, you know the style. Here's the kicker--the jorts are half blue denim and half black denim. Not top to bottom, which would be really cool, but one leg faded blue, the other non-faded black. I had to do a double take to make sure I was seeing what I thought I was seeing.

Thanks for reading, now back to your regularly scheduled Michael Vick updates.

:X

Half jorts, half blorts?! Awesome.

They were pretty snazzy. :lmao:
Link to comment
Share on other sites

My favorite combo is the tucked short sleeve shirt and stone washed jorts. And of course the belt has a cell phone/pda clipped to it for any IT/WoW guild emergencies that might arise.

Bonus points for a socks/sandals combo.

Extra Bonus points if you also resemble Gene Shalit...RIP
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just to keep this thread alive, here's a new one.

My office is in a community center that rents rooms to outside groups for meetings. Today, in the room next to my office is the monthly real estate meeting for the county RE association. That in itself is entertaining, due to the diversity of the county I live in. Some agents that think they are high powered brokers that dress and act the part, regular guy brokers in khakis/polo, rural property brokers in jeans and boots, and the oddball brokers in shorts, holey pants, T-shirts, etc.

One of the oddball guys is in a pastel striped polo and jorts. Not the urban, baggy jorts, but the Levi type. 3-4" above the knee and tight to the leg, you know the style. Here's the kicker--the jorts are half blue denim and half black denim. Not top to bottom, which would be really cool, but one leg faded blue, the other non-faded black. I had to do a double take to make sure I was seeing what I thought I was seeing.

Thanks for reading, now back to your regularly scheduled Michael Vick updates.

:goodposting:

Half jorts, half blorts?! Awesome.

This guy is really breaking new ground.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

My favorite combo is the tucked short sleeve shirt and stone washed jorts. And of course the belt has a cell phone/pda clipped to it for any IT/WoW guild emergencies that might arise.Bonus points for a socks/sandals combo.

I saw dozens of Jorts + wife beater combos at the Lincoln Park Zoo last weekend.Very surprised.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

My favorite combo is the tucked short sleeve shirt and stone washed jorts. And of course the belt has a cell phone/pda clipped to it for any IT/WoW guild emergencies that might arise.Bonus points for a socks/sandals combo.

I saw dozens of Jorts + wife beater combos at the Lincoln Park Zoo last weekend.Very surprised.
I live my Navy Pier and it's a daily jort parade.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

More jort observations:Just got back from picking up my mom at the airport and saw four jort-wearing men.One was with a woman.One had a mullet.One had a skullet.One was wearing a t-shirt with a donkey on it that read "I'm a smart one."

Are you sure these aren't just Arkansas observations?
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Another sighting tonight. There was a minor fire in our building after a pump seized up. One of the "officials" on the scene was sporting jorts, a cell phone clip, and a fanny pack. That's a look that never goes out of style.

A bluetooth would really complete that look.
He had a walkie talkie.Funny thing about this incident, there was no alarm sounded, nor was the building evacuated. The "evacuation" process encompassed people milling around wondering what the smell was and eventually running into frantic fire fighters with hoses. It's not like we were gonna die or anything, but jeebus..
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Another sighting tonight. There was a minor fire in our building after a pump seized up. One of the "officials" on the scene was sporting jorts, a cell phone clip, and a fanny pack. That's a look that never goes out of style.

A bluetooth would really complete that look.
He had a walkie talkie.Funny thing about this incident, there was no alarm sounded, nor was the building evacuated. The "evacuation" process encompassed people milling around wondering what the smell was and eventually running into frantic fire fighters with hoses. It's not like we were gonna die or anything, but jeebus..
I'll be rocking my Jorts and Crocs at mhII to prove that the look can be pulled off, if I feel crazy enough I may throw the bluetooth in.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Restore formatting

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.

×
  • Create New...