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Moo.

HELLO FROM REHAB!!!!   Not sure if anything's been shared but Sunday dinner at my parents' a couple weeks ago was in fact an elaborate ruse to stage an intervention.  Actually it wasn't very

Everybody take a minute tonight (or today) to raise a glass to HeckDad.  My sister just called to tell me that he passed away at home.  Don't have details other than he fell, but he was 94 with a bad

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3 hours ago, Nick Vermeil said:

I don't know why but somehow I feel in here is the best place to get an answer to this question.  

About two months ago I was crippled by intestinal pain.  No other symptoms.  After a battery of invasive testing they discovered I have parasites probably from that stupid ap El Floppo made me sign up on for lunch.  The doctor treats with antibiotics and I feel a lot better after 5 days of drugs.  Two weeks later, pain is back. The m'therF'ers survived.  During this whole thing I've not really been able to eat or drink alcohol so I've shed about 20 lbs.

Currently I'm in the middle of the second round attempt to kill these bastards. 10 days of treatment, a total of 83 pills. The usual disclaimer of no alcohol is on the pill bottle. My wife and I have dinner reservations tonight and I want to have one beer.  Just one g'damn beer.  What's the worst that could happen?

I'm guessing this question has already been answered in here on like page 372.  Thanks!

hammer down....braggart

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15 hours ago, mr roboto said:

I sent out a calendar invite to a prospect today (who I had already talked to) and misspelled her name (Kaite instead of Katie). She replied immediately ‘My name IS NOT KAITE.’

My response - ‘Sorry for the typo. I will correct and resend the meeting invite to reflect the proper spelling of your name.’

Her response - thx...

Not sure how to read the ellipses...

People who react like this to a mistake related to their names are utterly absurd.  

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12 hours ago, DA RAIDERS said:

:hifive:   Go for it, I call people on it when I feel like it. My utility bill has been spelled like that for the last 16 years. :shrug:  too much of a PIA to change it. 

My caller ID showed up as "Foster" for several years when I called people.  Kind of thought that was funny.  Nobody spells my name right.  Who cares?  So dumb when people get upset.  My mom invited some lady over from the church to watch a Ducks game a few years ago.  She called her by "Kristy" instead of "Krista" and the lady went borneo.  She sat by herself downstairs for most of the game.  What a shrew.

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My HOA has monthly meetings and is frequented by snowbirds that are quite decrepit.  The wife’s name is Mary Lynn (we call her harpy) and the HOA president called her Marilyn.  She totally lost her #### in the meeting.  It was funny.  “MY NAME IS MARY LYNN....ARGHHHH”. That was one of the last meetings I went to.  

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On ‎2‎/‎13‎/‎2018 at 1:11 PM, heckmanm said:
On ‎2‎/‎13‎/‎2018 at 1:09 PM, General Malaise said:

Actually, that's not true.  Not sure how it happened, but my oldest is now a freshman in HS and has straight As and is in AP classes.  His ACT scores he took last year were unreal.  Considering his parents, I'm kind of surprised.  

Well, presumably he hasn't discovered booze yet...

Or nannies

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Cooked up two giant cowboy steaks last night.  They were devine.  Course I caught my grill on fire before hand when I wasn't paying attention, but the actual cooking part went well.  Never had these before.  Bring on the heart failure, I say!

My dad's been living at home alone while my mom has spent the last 9 weeks between the hospital and a rehab center.  He's been living like a bachelor and I'm sure that while he misses his wife, there's a part of him that enjoys the peace and tranquility.  That ends this week as all 3 of my mom's sisters will be in town and staying at their house.  He despises one of them, the oldest.  Bossy and cheap.  Another one of them will get drunk and start rearranging his house.  Poor guy.

Taking my wife to see Golden State play tonight.  Quite the romantic I am.  In-laws are in town, so we actually have competent babysitters for this evening.  Will be very nice to have a night out with her and the assurance that the kids are okay.

Finally, I'm taking Kellen to the DMV today to take the driving test for his learner's permit.  He's been 15 since November, but just didn't really want to rush out and get his permit.  Today is that day and I'm sure he'll pass it.  However, I am NOT looking forward to driving with him.  For you parents that went through this, how bad was it?  We've practiced over the last year in giant parking lots but never on the street.  I'm terrified.  

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3 minutes ago, General Malaise said:

Cooked up two giant cowboy steaks last night.  They were devine.  Course I caught my grill on fire before hand when I wasn't paying attention, but the actual cooking part went well.  Never had these before.  Bring on the heart failure, I say!

My dad's been living at home alone while my mom has spent the last 9 weeks between the hospital and a rehab center.  He's been living like a bachelor and I'm sure that while he misses his wife, there's a part of him that enjoys the peace and tranquility.  That ends this week as all 3 of my mom's sisters will be in town and staying at their house.  He despises one of them, the oldest.  Bossy and cheap.  Another one of them will get drunk and start rearranging his house.  Poor guy.

Taking my wife to see Golden State play tonight.  Quite the romantic I am.  In-laws are in town, so we actually have competent babysitters for this evening.  Will be very nice to have a night out with her and the assurance that the kids are okay.

Finally, I'm taking Kellen to the DMV today to take the driving test for his learner's permit.  He's been 15 since November, but just didn't really want to rush out and get his permit.  Today is that day and I'm sure he'll pass it.  However, I am NOT looking forward to driving with him.  For you parents that went through this, how bad was it?  We've practiced over the last year in giant parking lots but never on the street.  I'm terrified.  

Timely posting.  My oldest son just took his behind the wheel test and passed, so he now is a legal driver.  Been through the driving lessons and everything.  I think how it goes is going to largely depend on the kid.  I had no fear when I learned how to drive, which lead me to be a horrible driver as a teen.  It is not an overstatement to say I am truly lucky to have survived those years.  My son, however, had plenty of fear driving.  We spend several sessions just driving around an empty parking lot before he got to the point of even wanting to drive to the parking lot to practice.  The first sessions were rough, he didn't get the touch on braking, accelerated to fast then pulled off the gas, turns were horrible, couldn't stay near the curb going around it, everything.  There are still some details he's not great on, but he's a cautious driver, and I don't really have any choice but to trust him when he leaves the house on his own.  I already went through this with my step daughter, and she was in a similiar boat (not overly confident, which lead to more caution while driving).  She, now 20, has done great, no accidents, etc.

I'm a big believer in when parents are nervous/excited about something, it gets passed on to the kids.  Try to be confident and relaxed when going through the lessons, because if you are nervous and freak out, that's how they are going to be when they drive.  No one wants that.

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20 minutes ago, General Malaise said:

Finally, I'm taking Kellen to the DMV today to take the driving test for his learner's permit.  He's been 15 since November, but just didn't really want to rush out and get his permit.  Today is that day and I'm sure he'll pass it.  However, I am NOT looking forward to driving with him.  For you parents that went through this, how bad was it?  We've practiced over the last year in giant parking lots but never on the street.  I'm terrified.  

It can be terrifying. I had moments where I just made him pull the car over and switch with me because of the dumb #### he was doing. Told him that driving was more than likely the only time in his life when he'll have the lives of others in his hands and that he better take it seriously because that's not something he wants to live with if it goes wrong. He's gotten to the point that he was pretty good around town and have no problem with him driving. However, he's 18 now, been licensed for about a year and a haf and still give a mumble 'thanks' to myself each time he gets home safely.

For example, he still isn't seasoned enough to do interstate / tollway driving comfortably and ended up on one the other day because that's how Waze had him get from point A to point B. He did it, but I my stomach was dropping while he was telling me about it.

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I know everyone has been on the edge of their seat waiting to see if Berndog’s son would remain in Honor Society.   So here is the rest of the story….:popcorn:

I called a teacher at school and got him to sign a form saying my son completed his volunteer hours.  This wasn’t much of a stretch and was critical in his defense.

Today I met with the NHS advisor and a Principal.  The small talk quickly dissipated and I started with, “ I’m here to defend my son’s character as what has been written is a gross misrepresentation... ”   I was passionate, pissed off and amusing myself.  I like to think I was a mixture of William Wallace and Nathan R. Jessup but in reality I was probably closer to Joe Pesci at the beginning of My Cousin Vinnie.  At one point the Principal tried to get a word in and I replied  ”I will come back to you but I’m on a roll right now.” :lmao:

When I handed them the signed volunteer form they had no choice to re-consider their decision.  I told them “reconsider, don’t reconsider I came here to set the record straight and I honestly don’t care if he is in NHS.  I just wanted you to know the truth”

I then asked the teacher to leave so I could address the Principal in private. :hot: This isn’t the first time we’ve spoken and there is a history of him being ineffective and spineless.  I blasted him for pulling my kid out of class yesterday and making him feel like he had done something wrong.  It was heated, wonderful and I got scolded for swearing. :lmao:   I told him to never speak to my kid again unless I was present.  He said that isn't possible and I said you can pull him out of class but he will never say a word to you if I’m not there.   

I received an email shortly after getting home he was back in.  Induction ceremony is tomorrow night and I'm leaning towards skipping it. 

TLDR: Kids back in National Honor Society but not cool enough to be a finger blaster model

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1 hour ago, Osaurus said:

My HOA has monthly meetings and is frequented by snowbirds that are quite decrepit.  The wife’s name is Mary Lynn (we call her harpy) and the HOA president called her Marilyn.  She totally lost her #### in the meeting.  It was funny.  “MY NAME IS MARY LYNN....ARGHHHH”. That was one of the last meetings I went to.  

was there at least a general murmur of agreement?

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4 minutes ago, berndog said:

I know everyone has been on the edge of their seat waiting to see if Berndog’s son would remain in Honor Society.   So here is the rest of the story….:popcorn:

I called a teacher at school and got him to sign a form saying my son completed his volunteer hours.  This wasn’t much of a stretch and was critical in his defense.

Today I met with the NHS advisor and a Principal.  The small talk quickly dissipated and I started with, “ I’m here to defend my son’s character as what has been written is a gross misrepresentation... ”   I was passionate, pissed off and amusing myself.  I like to think I was a mixture of William Wallace and Nathan R. Jessup but in reality I was probably closer to Joe Pesci at the beginning of My Cousin Vinnie.  At one point the Principal tried to get a word in and I replied  ”I will come back to you but I’m on a roll right now.” :lmao:

When I handed them the signed volunteer form they had no choice to re-consider their decision.  I told them “reconsider, don’t reconsider I came here to set the record straight and I honestly don’t care if he is in NHS.  I just wanted you to know the truth”

I then asked the teacher to leave so I could address the Principal in private. :hot: This isn’t the first time we’ve spoken and there is a history of him being ineffective and spineless.  I blasted him for pulling my kid out of class yesterday and making him feel like he had done something wrong.  It was heated, wonderful and I got scolded for swearing. :lmao:   I told him to never speak to my kid again unless I was present.  He said that isn't possible and I said you can pull him out of class but he will never say a word to you if I’m not there.   

I received an email shortly after getting home he was back in.  Induction ceremony is tomorrow night and I'm leaning towards skipping it. 

TLDR: Kids back in National Honor Society but not cool enough to be a finger blaster model

Awesome.  :thumbup:

 

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I have 2 kids behind the wheel now.  It can be a terrifying experience but it is one of the most important things to teach so they are safe

A lot depends on the kid but here is what worked for me

  • Take it slow at first.  Driving thru empty parking lots, neighborhoods, country roads etc. to get their confidence up is great.
  • Shorter trips are better than spending a couple hours driving.  Especially at first
  • If your nervous in the passenger seat your kid will be a nervous driver
  • If your kid is in the car they need to be driving.  This one was hard for me but it’s true.
  • They need to see the “big picture”.  Make sure they are looking way down the road and not just at the car right in front of them
  • Practice merging.  It sucks at first but it is the only way they get better.  We would get on the highway and every exit we would get off and right back on.  Eventually they will be merging like pros and you will feel better when they leave the house.
  • Having a DD is awesome.  :banned:

I was lucky enough to have this class in my back yard  https://putonthebrakes.org/home.  It is run by professional drivers and is awesome.  It isn’t offered in Oregon but anyone with kids should see if it is offered in their neck of the woods.

Hold on and enjoy the ride!

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1 hour ago, berndog said:

 there is a history of him being ineffective and spineless.

Well, on the plus side, I'm guessing he'll go out of his way to not have to interact with you again. 

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3 hours ago, General Malaise said:

People who react like this to a mistake related to their names are utterly absurd.  

First real job out of college I had to go talk to some bag in purchasing and said “hey Kim...” and was immediately cut off while she pointed to her “Kimberly” sign so I always made sure to call her “Kemburly” going forward 

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5 hours ago, berndog said:

I know everyone has been on the edge of their seat waiting to see if Berndog’s son would remain in Honor Society.   So here is the rest of the story….:popcorn:

I called a teacher at school and got him to sign a form saying my son completed his volunteer hours.  This wasn’t much of a stretch and was critical in his defense.

Today I met with the NHS advisor and a Principal.  The small talk quickly dissipated and I started with, “ I’m here to defend my son’s character as what has been written is a gross misrepresentation... ”   I was passionate, pissed off and amusing myself.  I like to think I was a mixture of William Wallace and Nathan R. Jessup but in reality I was probably closer to Joe Pesci at the beginning of My Cousin Vinnie.  At one point the Principal tried to get a word in and I replied  ”I will come back to you but I’m on a roll right now.” :lmao:

When I handed them the signed volunteer form they had no choice to re-consider their decision.  I told them “reconsider, don’t reconsider I came here to set the record straight and I honestly don’t care if he is in NHS.  I just wanted you to know the truth”

I then asked the teacher to leave so I could address the Principal in private. :hot: This isn’t the first time we’ve spoken and there is a history of him being ineffective and spineless.  I blasted him for pulling my kid out of class yesterday and making him feel like he had done something wrong.  It was heated, wonderful and I got scolded for swearing. :lmao:   I told him to never speak to my kid again unless I was present.  He said that isn't possible and I said you can pull him out of class but he will never say a word to you if I’m not there.   

I received an email shortly after getting home he was back in.  Induction ceremony is tomorrow night and I'm leaning towards skipping it. 

TLDR: Kids back in National Honor Society but not cool enough to be a finger blaster model

We did it!

 

”I will come back to you but I’m on a roll right now.”....Rules

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5 hours ago, berndog said:

It can be a terrifying experience

The absolute worst was when my daughter was driving home from college one time, stopped in traffic she called me, all of a sudden a scream, heard the phone bounce and then nothing. Called and called for what seemed like an hour (Was probably only 15mins or so, but still) She got rear ended while stopped. She was ok, but the fear is unreal... I don't wish that on anyone

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I drove a ‘90 Dodge Spirit. The wheel fell off driving around McCormick Place on Lake Shore Drive. We used to stand on its roof at bonfires, and throw pallets into the fire. CD player was broke so I could only listen to a WILCO album that I didn’t really like. Loved that car. Puked on it in the parking lot of a Creed concert. 

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me: we should really put the bed together this weekend 

someone else that i know: yeah, "we" should.. but i don't know what you did with the slats when we moved

me: if they're not in here with the rest of the bed parts, then they're probably in the basement

someone else that i know: yeah, well, i don't know that because you freaking moved everything in random places and i can't find anything!

me: (scours the house, no slats) i couldn't find them. maybe there weren't any? i didn't throw anything out. all the bed parts went in the room where the specific bed belonged.... did i look in your dressing room? no.

someone else that i know: well, you should have because they're right freaking there!

me: you said you didn't know where the bed parts were and implied that i'd thrown them away  :mellow: 

someone else that i know: no. i did not. you didn't ask me where they were.

me: :mellow:

 

eta: names changed to protect the innocent

Edited by mr. furley
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1 minute ago, mr. furley said:

me: we should really put the bed together this weekend 

someone else that i know: yeah, "we" should.. but i don't know what you did with the slats when we moved

me: if they're not in here with the rest of the bed parts, then they're probably in the basement

someone else that i know: yeah, well, i don't know that because you freaking moved everything in random places and i can't find anything!

me: (scours the house, no slats) i couldn't find them. maybe there weren't any? i didn't throw anything out. all the bed parts went in the room where the specific bed belonged.... did i look in your dressing room? no.

someone else that i know: well, you should have because they're right freaking there!

me: you said you didn't know where the bed parts were and implied that i'd thrown them away  :mellow: 

someone else that i know: no. i did not. you didn't ask me where they were.

me: :mellow:

 

eta: names changed to protect the innocent

This me guy sounds like a real jag

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7 minutes ago, mr. furley said:

me: we should really put the bed together this weekend 

someone else that i know: yeah, "we" should.. but i don't know what you did with the slats when we moved

me: if they're not in here with the rest of the bed parts, then they're probably in the basement

someone else that i know: yeah, well, i don't know that because you freaking moved everything in random places and i can't find anything!

me: (scours the house, no slats) i couldn't find them. maybe there weren't any? i didn't throw anything out. all the bed parts went in the room where the specific bed belonged.... did i look in your dressing room? no.

someone else that i know: well, you should have because they're right freaking there!

me: you said you didn't know where the bed parts were and implied that i'd thrown them away  :mellow: 

someone else that i know: no. i did not. you didn't ask me where they were.

me: :mellow:

 

eta: names changed to protect the innocent

Dan's wife imo

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38 minutes ago, boom king said:

I drove a ‘90 Dodge Spirit. The wheel fell off driving around McCormick Place on Lake Shore Drive. We used to stand on its roof at bonfires, and throw pallets into the fire. CD player was broke so I could only listen to a WILCO album that I didn’t really like. Loved that car. Puked on it in the parking lot of a Creed concert. 

Change the last sentence to "Cuddled with my buddy and cried while we watched The Notebook".   Less embarrassing.

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21 minutes ago, mr. furley said:

me: we should really put the bed together this weekend 

someone else that i know: yeah, "we" should.. but i don't know what you did with the slats when we moved

me: if they're not in here with the rest of the bed parts, then they're probably in the basement

someone else that i know: yeah, well, i don't know that because you freaking moved everything in random places and i can't find anything!

me: (scours the house, no slats) i couldn't find them. maybe there weren't any? i didn't throw anything out. all the bed parts went in the room where the specific bed belonged.... did i look in your dressing room? no.

someone else that i know: well, you should have because they're right freaking there!

me: you said you didn't know where the bed parts were and implied that i'd thrown them away  :mellow: 

someone else that i know: no. i did not. you didn't ask me where they were.

me: :mellow:

 

eta: names changed to protect the innocent

Should I ever get married again?  Gosh, I just can't decide.

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1 hour ago, boom king said:

I drove a ‘90 Dodge Spirit. The wheel fell off driving around McCormick Place on Lake Shore Drive. We used to stand on its roof at bonfires, and throw pallets into the fire. CD player was broke so I could only listen to a WILCO album that I didn’t really like. Loved that car. Puked on it in the parking lot of a Creed concert. 

:lmao:

 

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1 hour ago, Reg Lllama of Brixton said:

LOOK AT ME! MY SOMEONE ELSE THAT I KNOW HAS A DRESSING ROOM!

it's really that guy's youngest daughters dressing room but someone else that guy knows is using it as (their) dressing room instead of using the closets in (their) bedroom 

someone else that guy knows won't be donating old clothes, shoes, etc. to make their clothes fit in the bedroom closets like that guy was forced to do when they moved because..... that's just.... insane to even consider.

 

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My son called at about 10:15 this morning. During school hours, I'll get a text from him every once in a while, but I honestly can't remember the last time he actually called from school. In the shadow of yesterday's events, I was instantly on high alert once I saw his name on my screen. I answer the phone and I can tell he's agitated, breathing heavy, upset about something. I'm instantly thinking worst case scenario before he even got a word out. Obviously ended up being nothing, a petty disagreement with a teacher, but the world we're living in today might be starting to take its toll on me.

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Had Indian food at an upscale restaurant downtown.  I thought of K4 and all of you when we ordered not one but two servings of basil garlic naan.  Neither the waiter nor my wife found my questions about their naan oven as comical as I did.  But man oh man was this place terrific.  Lamb vindaloo was out of this world and the appetizer we had (some spiced potato thing with garbanzo beans) ruled hard.  Haven't had Indian food in quite some time, but this was outstanding and a nice change of pace.

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