Homer J Simpson
I don't push
Point.Who doesn't have nudes of you already?
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GM's Thread About Everything/GM's Thread About Nothing (22 Viewers)
- Thread starter General Malaise
- Start date
-fish-
Footballguy
I was supposedly part of a CPS investigation only:
- it wasn't my kid;
- I didn't live in the house;
- I stopped seeing the kid's mom months before any complaint or investigation;
- nobody ever talked to me;
- the case was closed due to no evidence.
fantasycurse42
Footballguy Jr.
I'm a simple man... Outside of family, money, and my penis, this kind of stuff makes me smile.
http://i.imgur.com/NEA0sUG.jpg
http://i.imgur.com/NEA0sUG.jpg
El Floppo
Footballguy
fantasycurse42
Footballguy Jr.
S+PThey have great mixolgists
I'm 3 drinks in
my favorite pet about getting my wife an uber is tracking her on the map, she'll be here in 6-7 minutes...Good food and drinks, I recommend... Drinks overpriced, food prices fairly.
ETA: she is 2 minutes away, I'm slightly drunk... & a good night to all.
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General Malaise
Footballguy
You'd last to Race #3 on Kentucky Derby Day, tops.S+PThey have great mixolgists
I'm 3 drinks in
Good food and drinks, I recommend... Drinks overpriced, food prices fairly.
ETA: she is 2 minutes away, I'm slightly drunk... & a good night to all.
YSR
Footballguy
You'd last to Race #3 on Kentucky Derby Day, tops.S+PThey have great mixolgists
I'm 3 drinks in
Good food and drinks, I recommend... Drinks overpriced, food prices fairly.
ETA: she is 2 minutes away, I'm slightly drunk... & a good night to all.
heckmanm
Footballguy
Notorious T.R.E.
Showdown!™ Administrator
PLENTY OF CHAIRSYou'd last to Race #3 on Kentucky Derby Day, tops.S+PThey have great mixolgists
I'm 3 drinks in
Good food and drinks, I recommend... Drinks overpriced, food prices fairly.
ETA: she is 2 minutes away, I'm slightly drunk... & a good night to all.
Thorn
Footballguy
not sure how we survived last timePLENTY OF CHAIRSYou'd last to Race #3 on Kentucky Derby Day, tops.S+PThey have great mixolgists
I'm 3 drinks in
Good food and drinks, I recommend... Drinks overpriced, food prices fairly.
ETA: she is 2 minutes away, I'm slightly drunk... & a good night to all.
Officer Pete Malloy
Footballguy
Best Onion headline this week. http://www.theonion.com/articles/little-league-pitcher-just-getting-#######-shelled,38488/
strykerpks
Footballguy
So, I'm pretty jealous about the DerbzHole. Anyone else?
strykerpks
Footballguy
Frostillicus
Footballguy
Thorn
Footballguy
Dan Lambskin
Footballguy
Had to miss a bachelor party (more of a friend of a friend so couldn't get a pass from the wife)
fantasycurse42
Footballguy Jr.
My wife got us cut off at a restaurant last night 
We were sitting outside, she wanted to go inside bc it was getting colder - she goes to talk to the manager (my mistake), he comes over (I assumed to show me the new table) to tell me we were getting cut off
He shows me to the table he took my wife, then her and I exchanged some unpleasantries as I explained to her we were no longer allowed to drink... ... She then has it out with the manager, she was drunk enough to actually get cut in all honesty, I on the other hand wasn't happy bc I can drink forever. I thought it was entertaining so I didn't intervene - In her heels she is about 6'1 and this poor little gay restaurant manager was like 5'2, it was def a funny scene... At that point it was time to come home.
On another note, I think I'm gonna dispute the charge as we never ate our entrees and were still charged for them.
We were sitting outside, she wanted to go inside bc it was getting colder - she goes to talk to the manager (my mistake), he comes over (I assumed to show me the new table) to tell me we were getting cut off
He shows me to the table he took my wife, then her and I exchanged some unpleasantries as I explained to her we were no longer allowed to drink... ... She then has it out with the manager, she was drunk enough to actually get cut in all honesty, I on the other hand wasn't happy bc I can drink forever. I thought it was entertaining so I didn't intervene - In her heels she is about 6'1 and this poor little gay restaurant manager was like 5'2, it was def a funny scene... At that point it was time to come home.
On another note, I think I'm gonna dispute the charge as we never ate our entrees and were still charged for them.
Col. Steve Austin
Footballguy
What a coincidence, she briefly lived in the 206.
Of course there probably aren't many area codes you can't say that about.
Or zip codes.
Notorious T.R.E.
Showdown!™ Administrator
Notorious T.R.E.
Showdown!™ Administrator
TAKE THAT, GAYS!My wife got us cut off at a restaurant last night
We were sitting outside, she wanted to go inside bc it was getting colder - she goes to talk to the manager (my mistake), he comes over (I assumed to show me the new table) to tell me we were getting cut off
He shows me to the table he took my wife, then her and I exchanged some unpleasantries as I explained to her we were no longer allowed to drink... ... She then has it out with the manager, she was drunk enough to actually get cut in all honesty, I on the other hand wasn't happy bc I can drink forever. I thought it was entertaining so I didn't intervene - In her heels she is about 6'1 and this poor little gay restaurant manager was like 5'2, it was def a funny scene... At that point it was time to come home.
On another note, I think I'm gonna dispute the charge as we never ate our entrees and were still charged for them.
who gets cut off drinking at a restaurant in NYC on a Wednesday?
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Notorious T.R.E.
Showdown!™ Administrator
Other than BW3 threatening me for 3 shots of whisky in 45 mins, I don't think I've ever been kicked out of anywhere. For drinking that is.
Officer Pete Malloy
Footballguy
fantasycurse42
Footballguy Jr.
We did
I have something on the calendar everyday until Sunday, so if we were going out it had to be yesterday... Looking back on the bill, we did drink a lot... Should've thought this one through a little more. Have to go sit in a group seminar for the next 4 hours and then the Rangers game. Gonna be a struggle and tomorrow will be awful.First time I've been refused booze. My wife was pretty drunk, I can only imagine the conversation she had with this guy before he delivered the news.
Notorious T.R.E.
Showdown!™ Administrator
Officer Pete Malloy
Footballguy
5-ish Finkle
Footballguy
In New York they have something called "urban hiking." It's where you pile all of your dirty clothes onto your back, like that guy on the cover if Led Zepplin IV with the sticks, and then hobo it to the nearest laundromat.
Or that's the legend, anyway.
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Thorn
Footballguy
Almost just got in the wrong guy's car outside the airport. Some dude vaguely matching guster's height/weight waved me over. He was wearing sunglasses and a fedora (figured that was shtick). Got closer and realized, even for shtick, guster would not have a labrodoodle poking its head out of the car. Awkward "excuse me"
"When cornholing goes wrong"
"When cornholing goes wrong"
Notorious T.R.E.
Showdown!™ Administrator
Fedora!
Officer Pete Malloy
Footballguy
Floppo said he doesn't like coming into this thread any more know that he knows you're gay. Sorry.
5-ish Finkle
Footballguy
Would've been a way cooler story if you'd actually got in the car and didn't realize your mistake until halfway to Barstow, with the labradoodle riding shotgun, and the guy refused to stop because "We can't do that here. It's bat country."
Notorious T.R.E.
Showdown!™ Administrator
General Malaise
Footballguy
yup.
But let's be honest, I'd come out of the gate like Firing Line, drinking ALL TEH Bourbons, eating any edibles that might cross my face and doing whatever else might fall into my lap in the first hour. By Friday evening, I'd be a cranky mess, mad that instead of being fed in a lawn chair we had to actually drive to a restaurant. At the restaurant, I'd disappear in a mercurial funk, ask to drive home, pout, fall asleep in a car, make one last great flop like a dying fish to stay in the game before succumbing to a super duper, drug induced coma that would render me useless for the derby, forcing Homer and Tre to cart me around like Weekend at Forrest's, whereupon they would grow tired of that act, phone my mother and tell her to pick me up at the second turn next to the disposable chair camp.
I'd also need a new liver by Monday.
YSR
Footballguy
Officer Pete Malloy
Footballguy
From now on every cornhole must feature a labradoodle in a fedora.
I have spoken.
I have spoken.
General Malaise
Footballguy
Pics? Of the wife, not the entrees.My wife got us cut off at a restaurant last night
We were sitting outside, she wanted to go inside bc it was getting colder - she goes to talk to the manager (my mistake), he comes over (I assumed to show me the new table) to tell me we were getting cut off
He shows me to the table he took my wife, then her and I exchanged some unpleasantries as I explained to her we were no longer allowed to drink... ... She then has it out with the manager, she was drunk enough to actually get cut in all honesty, I on the other hand wasn't happy bc I can drink forever. I thought it was entertaining so I didn't intervene - In her heels she is about 6'1 and this poor little gay restaurant manager was like 5'2, it was def a funny scene... At that point it was time to come home.
On another note, I think I'm gonna dispute the charge as we never ate our entrees and were still charged for them.
General Malaise
Footballguy
