Jump to content
Fantasy Football - Footballguys Forums

Wooing my neighbor: I came. I hugged. I wooed. Now moving on.


Recommended Posts

1 hour ago, Nathan R. Jessep said:

thanks, fellas

Allow me to bare a little bit of my soul here.

I assure it is not a fishing trip. I'm a single dad who, while working a couple of jobs, has my kids the majority of the time. They are my priority, as I'm sure her kids are her priority, and should be. This will be a painstakingly slow process, but I am cautiously optimistic. 

My ex is and has been a bit of a mess over the last several years (since our divorce). She has not always been a shining positive influence for our kids, during that time, and I resent her for that more than anything she has ever done to me.  

As lame as it sounds (I can't believe I am about to type this), sex is honestly not a priority any more. Don't get it twisted, if it happens, awesome, and I would welcome it with open pants. But it's just not the main thing I'm looking for any more. There's plenty of free pr0n on the internet. Where I'm at in life now is that I am really looking for someone who I could possibly have a relationship with, and someone who would be that positive female role model for my kids. Is this woman the one? No clue yet, but it's possible. I like what I know about her so far.  I haven't posted, and likely won't post, 100% of everything that I know, just because I think it'd probably be boring to most/all of you sharks anyway, but it is stuff that is helping me get a better idea of who this woman is as a person.  

I appreciate the well-wishes, the shtick, and anyone following along with this little saga. I hold out hope that it has a happy ending and not a crash and burn. 

Pretty sure you stole this directly from the Arizona Ron thread.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

21 minutes ago, DocHolliday said:

Sex is still a priority for any male that has an ounce of testosterone in his body.  As you get older, sex moves down the list a notch or maybe two on the priority list.  Kids and family are moved to the top. 

Something strange is going on with the latest posts by the OP.  Either our guy is still really intimidated by this broad and knows that he is not going to have the nerve to make any moves or he is coming to terms with the fact that the woman is way out of his league and he does not stand a chance. 

I say to heck with all that.  You were given a gift from the heavens.  The big man put a single hottie next door to you.  You swing for the fences.  You keep working towards your goal.   

I agree

if he put this next door to you its fate. Spray on some AX and kick her door down

Link to comment
Share on other sites

4 minutes ago, Buckfast 1 said:

This isn't some broad from Tinder or girl from the bar at last call.  It's his neighbor who he will be forced to see on a regular basis for the foreseeable future.  There are long-term consequences to being too reckless in pursuit of carnal desires here.  Of course, NRJ wants to have sex with her eventually, but the slow play is definitely the best move in this situation, despite the FFA's desire for a climatic AZ Ron-style barbecue ####fest this week. 

:goodposting:

This is definitely in the same ballpark as the old "dipping your pen in the company ink" scenario. Adds a ton of potential consequences that make the guns a-blazin' full court press to get laid a really bad plan. She lives next door -- friendship should be the top priority. If anything else happens, well, then great, but there are a ton of places to just go and try to get some a$$ with no hint of the complications that come with living next door to someone for the next _____ years.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

To all of the people saying this is a fishing trip, I say get out and stay out.  I believe this is real.

The only thing I believe I'd disagree with is the perceived hotness of the target.  Better than Evangeline Lilly?  Possible but doubtful.  Very doubtful.

  • Like 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 minutes ago, ArbyMelt said:

which house will you sell when you move in together?

I'm envisioning an addition that connects the two ... or at least a tunnel. Mr. Brady was an architect, after all.

 

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, ChiefD said:

I think the goal for BBQ 1 should be to secure the phone number.

That opens up so many possibilities for text message updates from the Colonel. He could stretch this thread for 2-3 years. 

Awesomeness. :headbang:

That is absolutely the plan, if not before the BBQ. :thumbup: And as long as the BBQ vibe is good, and I feel like it will be, she will not leave the BBQ without having been invited to lunch next week. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, James Daulton said:

I've been married a billion years, am older than you, and sex is still a priority for me.  How can a guy who can get strange on the regular say it's not a priority?  I mean, you have to take care of your kids over sex (I guess) but other than that, what else comes first?

If you say freaking disc golf I will lose my mind.

Understood. And don't get me wrong, it's definitely still important to me. And definitely a key part of any lasting relationship for those under the age of ~65, IMO. But, it's not the first thing I'm looking for right now. As someone else mentioned, there's plenty of opportunity for that elsewhere. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

39 minutes ago, DocHolliday said:

Sex is still a priority for any male that has an ounce of testosterone in his body.  As you get older, sex moves down the list a notch or maybe two on the priority list.  Kids and family are moved to the top. 

Something strange is going on with the latest posts by the OP.  Either our guy is still really intimidated by this broad and knows that he is not going to have the nerve to make any moves or he is coming to terms with the fact that the woman is way out of his league and he does not stand a chance. 

I say to heck with all that.  You were given a gift from the heavens.  The big man put a single hottie next door to you.  You swing for the fences.  You keep working towards your goal.   

I'm not sure she's not out of my league, but that's not going to stop me from trying anyway. I do also believe somewhat in fate, etc. and from the facts I have been given in this case, it would seem fate is telling me to go for this one. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 hours ago, Nathan R. Jessep said:

Don't get it twisted, if it happens, awesome, and I would welcome it with open pants. But it's just not the main thing I'm looking for any more.

:clap:this was a nice line.

It's amazing how priorities and life changes after kids and especially divorce w/ kids.  Getting laid isn't always the #1 priority. 

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 hours ago, Nathan R. Jessep said:

thanks, fellas

Allow me to bare a little bit of my soul here.

I assure it is not a fishing trip. I'm a single dad who, while working a couple of jobs, has my kids the majority of the time. They are my priority, as I'm sure her kids are her priority, and should be. This will be a painstakingly slow process, but I am cautiously optimistic. 

My ex is and has been a bit of a mess over the last several years (since our divorce). She has not always been a shining positive influence for our kids, during that time, and I resent her for that more than anything she has ever done to me.  

As lame as it sounds (I can't believe I am about to type this), sex is honestly not a priority any more. Don't get it twisted, if it happens, awesome, and I would welcome it with open pants. But it's just not the main thing I'm looking for any more. There's plenty of free pr0n on the internet. Where I'm at in life now is that I am really looking for someone who I could possibly have a relationship with, and someone who would be that positive female role model for my kids. Is this woman the one? No clue yet, but it's possible. I like what I know about her so far.  I haven't posted, and likely won't post, 100% of everything that I know, just because I think it'd probably be boring to most/all of you sharks anyway, but it is stuff that is helping me get a better idea of who this woman is as a person.  

I appreciate the well-wishes, the shtick, and anyone following along with this little saga. I hold out hope that it has a happy ending and not a crash and burn. 

sounds like you should hire a nanny and let instamom find a real man.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

look someone has to say it so it might as well be me do not do the wall thing its not funny it never works and its just a bad idea no one wants to hear it just play it cool talk about hemis you used to own and let her come to you after she learns your a mopar man that is all i am sayin play a little hard to get take that to the bank bromigo 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

18 minutes ago, SWC said:

look someone has to say it so it might as well be me do not do the wall thing its not funny it never works and its just a bad idea no one wants to hear it just play it cool talk about hemis you used to own and let her come to you after she learns your a mopar man that is all i am sayin play a little hard to get take that to the bank bromigo 

Thanks, brorito. I don't generally go around "in character," though I do drop movie quotes and song lyric references from time to time when opportunities present themselves. It's a gift. And a curse. Take THAT to the bank. 

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 minute ago, Dickie Dunn said:

Or, a full season for a quarterback at LSU.

:ducks:

 

:lol: don't sleep on LSU this season! They're not my main college team, but I do keep up with them. They're touting a different looking pass offense this year. Let's hope they're right. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 hours ago, Coeur de Lion said:

:goodposting:

This is definitely in the same ballpark as the old "dipping your pen in the company ink" scenario. Adds a ton of potential consequences that make the guns a-blazin' full court press to get laid a really bad plan. She lives next door -- friendship should be the top priority. If anything else happens, well, then great, but there are a ton of places to just go and try to get some a$$ with no hint of the complications that come with living next door to someone for the next _____ years.

That and dating coworkers are always risky. Do you leave your work or move if things go real sour?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 hours ago, Nathan R. Jessep said:

I'm not sure she's not out of my league, but that's not going to stop me from trying anyway. I do also believe somewhat in fate, etc. and from the facts I have been given in this case, it would seem fate is telling me to go for this one. 

Having kids herself, single mother, probably plays in your favour. She's probably looking for the same thing and let's face it, having kids at home crosses you off many lists. So looks wise you may or may not be out of her league in her mind, but shine with not only your kids but hers as well as they are very important for both of you. You have more things you can do since there are kids involved as well, esp if they all get along. Play on the kids card. For what your priorities are right now I think both of you having kids is a plus. And as such since kids are involved AND you are next door neighbours, definitely go slow. Like said already, if you need to hook up, plenty of fish (an actual site) are out there for that. Just don't bring the other gal home! :D

#teamNRJ

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

12 minutes ago, CurlyNight said:

Having kids herself, single mother, probably plays in your favour. She's probably looking for the same thing and let's face it, having kids at home crosses you off many lists. So looks wise you may or may not be out of her league in her mind, but shine with not only your kids but hers as well as they are very important for both of you. You have more things you can do since there are kids involved as well, esp if they all get along. Play on the kids card. For what your priorities are right now I think both of you having kids is a plus. And as such since kids are involved AND you are next door neighbours, definitely go slow. Like said already, if you need to hook up, plenty of fish (an actual site) are out there for that. Just don't bring the other gal home! :D

#teamNRJ

Exactly.  He's already got three big things going for him - proximity, good with kids, and a job.  As long as he's not disgusting to look at or obnoxious he's likely a good catch in her mind.   

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 hours ago, Nathan R. Jessep said:

I'm not sure she's not out of my league, but that's not going to stop me from trying anyway. I do also believe somewhat in fate, etc. and from the facts I have been given in this case, it would seem fate is telling me to go for this one. 

A woman with two kids is not out of anyone's league.

  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

3 hours ago, DocHolliday said:

Sex is still a priority for any male that has an ounce of testosterone in his body.  As you get older, sex moves down the list a notch or maybe two on the priority list.  Kids and family are moved to the top. 

Something strange is going on with the latest posts by the OP.  Either our guy is still really intimidated by this broad and knows that he is not going to have the nerve to make any moves or he is coming to terms with the fact that the woman is way out of his league and he does not stand a chance. 

I say to heck with all that.  You were given a gift from the heavens.  The big man put a single hottie next door to you.  You swing for the fences.  You keep working towards your goal.   

 

:goodposting:

Swing for the fences bud!   And if you come up short... pick yourself up, dust yourself off and peep over the fence creeper style like the neighbor from Home Improvement.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

51 minutes ago, cstu said:

BTW, what do you think of her kids...well-behaved, terrors?

Well, the one girl really wanted to bring him cookies. No doubt she's a fantastic kid and adorable. Probably has an older brother or sister that's a bit more of a pain the ### though. No doubt will become even moreso once they realize the neighbor is trying to rail their mom.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, DA RAIDERS said:

hotter than her..

To be fair, he said prettier face and similar body.  Similar might mean like an extra 10 - 20 lbs.  I can see the prettier face, if you're not into freckles.  

But Kate's body... :wub:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

3 hours ago, SWC said:

look someone has to say it so it might as well be me do not do the wall thing its not funny it never works and its just a bad idea no one wants to hear it just play it cool talk about hemis you used to own and let her come to you after she learns your a mopar man that is all i am sayin play a little hard to get take that to the bank bromigo 

at the very worst our hero should be taking some mental pictures that he can deposit and take to the spankbank for later bbqmigo

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, Buckfast 1 said:

You should definitely deploy a Slip 'N Slide for this barbecue.  It's easy entertainment to keep the kids occupied while you are chatting up mom, and the kids will soon be asking mom when they can go back to NRJ's house to play.  

I wish I would have thought of this great idea. 

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 hours ago, Buttonhook said:

This thread has taken a turn for the worse.  Taking your time?  WTF? 

Maybe you need to get a pedicure.  It seems to help AZ Ron speed up the process.

You realize those stories are made up, right?

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

8 hours ago, Nathan R. Jessep said:

thanks, fellas

Allow me to bare a little bit of my soul here.

I assure it is not a fishing trip. I'm a single dad who, while working a couple of jobs, has my kids the majority of the time. They are my priority, as I'm sure her kids are her priority, and should be. This will be a painstakingly slow process, but I am cautiously optimistic. 

My ex is and has been a bit of a mess over the last several years (since our divorce). She has not always been a shining positive influence for our kids, during that time, and I resent her for that more than anything she has ever done to me.  

As lame as it sounds (I can't believe I am about to type this), sex is honestly not a priority any more. Don't get it twisted, if it happens, awesome, and I would welcome it with open pants. But it's just not the main thing I'm looking for any more. There's plenty of free pr0n on the internet. Where I'm at in life now is that I am really looking for someone who I could possibly have a relationship with, and someone who would be that positive female role model for my kids. Is this woman the one? No clue yet, but it's possible. I like what I know about her so far.  I haven't posted, and likely won't post, 100% of everything that I know, just because I think it'd probably be boring to most/all of you sharks anyway, but it is stuff that is helping me get a better idea of who this woman is as a person.  

I appreciate the well-wishes, the shtick, and anyone following along with this little saga. I hold out hope that it has a happy ending and not a crash and burn. 

I'm right there with you, brother; going through a divorce and looking for a new relationship.  A long term connection is the priority, not sex.  Do things at your own pace for yourself and your family...not to titillate some bored, middle-aged men on a message board.  

Edited by Captain Cranks
  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Restore formatting

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.

×
  • Create New...