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Clothing Optional (1 Viewer)

Do you guys really get Boehners just by looking at naked chicks? :unsure:
If they are hot, and live in the flesh, and in close proximity, and playing around in water, then it is a distinct possibility.
:goodposting: I'd be worried if you didn't...unless you've reached that age where you need a little medical assistance... :unsure:
medical assistance? no. but i do need a little, you know...stimulation. :unsure: like...do you guys walk around with Boehners at strip clubs? I don't.
:goodposting: I've read here how some guys finish in their pants too. WTF?!
Seriously. I don't even sport during sex. :flex:
 
Do you guys really get Boehners just by looking at naked chicks? :unsure:
If they are hot, and live in the flesh, and in close proximity, and playing around in water, then it is a distinct possibility.
:goodposting: I'd be worried if you didn't...unless you've reached that age where you need a little medical assistance... :unsure:
medical assistance? no. but i do need a little, you know...stimulation. :unsure: like...do you guys walk around with Boehners at strip clubs? I don't.
:goodposting: I've read here how some guys finish in their pants too. WTF?!
Seriously. I don't even sport during sex. :flex:
:lmao:
 
Do you guys really get Boehners just by looking at naked chicks? :unsure:
If they are hot, and live in the flesh, and in close proximity, and playing around in water, then it is a distinct possibility.
:goodposting: I'd be worried if you didn't...unless you've reached that age where you need a little medical assistance... :unsure:
medical assistance? no. but i do need a little, you know...stimulation. :unsure: like...do you guys walk around with Boehners at strip clubs? I don't.
:goodposting: I've read here how some guys finish in their pants too. WTF?!
Seriously. I don't even sport during sex. :flex:
Like stuffing a marshmallow into your piggybank.
 
It's pretty easy for it to happen in ThisStoryIsMadeUpLand
Meh. A little too obviously made up. Good effort though.
Given the FFA's skepticism, I'm kinda surprised these are the only two :fishing: accusations so far.Obviously, I'm enjoying telling the story, but the story is legit.

:shrug:
Riiiiiiight. Which is why, as an anonymous poster to an inconspicuous internet message board, you can't give us a link to the place you visited.
 
It's pretty easy for it to happen in ThisStoryIsMadeUpLand
Meh. A little too obviously made up. Good effort though.
Given the FFA's skepticism, I'm kinda surprised these are the only two :fishing: accusations so far.Obviously, I'm enjoying telling the story, but the story is legit.

:shrug:
Riiiiiiight. Which is why, as an anonymous poster to an inconspicuous internet message board, you can't give us a link to the place you visited.
would it be that hard to find a place to post?
 
It's pretty easy for it to happen in ThisStoryIsMadeUpLand
Meh. A little too obviously made up. Good effort though.
Given the FFA's skepticism, I'm kinda surprised these are the only two :fishing: accusations so far.Obviously, I'm enjoying telling the story, but the story is legit. :shrug:
Uh, no....I'd say 20% of the people here buy this story. No offense. I don't buy it, but I'm enjoying the read, so please...continue.
 
Well, other than not posting a link to the place, giving us the city/state of the place, nor providing a picture of his wife who is an 80% match to Kate Winslet, he's also managed to drag the story out in parts....which is garnering some skepticism from the upper elite who are discussing the validity of this thread elsewhere. It's a good read, but the concensus is that it's fabricated.

now, carry on....

 
nothing wrong with a little carpet....the totally shaved look is a breeding ground for ingrown hairs. yuck. I'll take a little patch of grass over red bumps any day of the week.

 
Well, other than not posting a link to the place, giving us the city/state of the place, nor providing a picture of his wife who is an 80% match to Kate Winslet, he's also managed to drag the story out in parts....which is garnering some skepticism from the upper elite who are discussing the validity of this thread elsewhere. It's a good read, but the concensus is that it's fabricated.now, carry on....
:lmao: this is the height of nerddom
 
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Well, other than not posting a link to the place, giving us the city/state of the place, nor providing a picture of his wife who is an 80% match to Kate Winslet, he's also managed to drag the story out in parts....which is garnering some skepticism from the upper elite who are discussing the validity of this thread elsewhere. It's a good read, but the concensus is that it's fabricated.now, carry on....
:lmao: this is the height of nerddom
:bag:100% true too.
 
Well, other than not posting a link to the place, giving us the city/state of the place, nor providing a picture of his wife who is an 80% match to Kate Winslet, he's also managed to drag the story out in parts....which is garnering some skepticism from the upper elite who are discussing the validity of this thread elsewhere. It's a good read, but the concensus is that it's fabricated.now, carry on....
really it sounds kinda boring for the most part (my wife is a freak though), I'm buying it.
 
It's pretty easy for it to happen in ThisStoryIsMadeUpLand
Meh. A little too obviously made up. Good effort though.
Given the FFA's skepticism, I'm kinda surprised these are the only two :fishing: accusations so far.Obviously, I'm enjoying telling the story, but the story is legit.

:shrug:
Riiiiiiight. Which is why, as an anonymous poster to an inconspicuous internet message board, you can't give us a link to the place you visited.
would it be that hard to find a place to post?
Kinda what I'm thinking. I could have posted a link to any of dozens of places at any point if I wasn't legitimately trying to ensure anonymity.I'm not that internet saavy, but the thing that got me leaning against posting a link was the "Wife uses sex as a weapon" thread. Someone in that thread posted a link to or the name of a blog, and next thing you know Athol Kay, the blogger, is posting in the FFA saying he saw his site mentioned. Just kinda stuck with me.

 
It's pretty easy for it to happen in ThisStoryIsMadeUpLand
Meh. A little too obviously made up. Good effort though.
Given the FFA's skepticism, I'm kinda surprised these are the only two :fishing: accusations so far.Obviously, I'm enjoying telling the story, but the story is legit.

:shrug:
Riiiiiiight. Which is why, as an anonymous poster to an inconspicuous internet message board, you can't give us a link to the place you visited.
would it be that hard to find a place to post?
Kinda what I'm thinking. I could have posted a link to any of dozens of places at any point if I wasn't legitimately trying to ensure anonymity.I'm not that internet saavy, but the thing that got me leaning against posting a link was the "Wife uses sex as a weapon" thread. Someone in that thread posted a link to or the name of a blog, and next thing you know Athol Kay, the blogger, is posting in the FFA saying he saw his site mentioned. Just kinda stuck with me.
Cool. Keep delaying the rest of the story. It's working for you.
 
It's pretty easy for it to happen in ThisStoryIsMadeUpLand
Meh. A little too obviously made up. Good effort though.
Given the FFA's skepticism, I'm kinda surprised these are the only two :fishing: accusations so far.Obviously, I'm enjoying telling the story, but the story is legit. :shrug:
You forgot:
Is this the thread where we write our own submissions to Penthouse forum?
 
The hot tub is custom built, not a pre-fab deal, and it has seating all the way around. Could fit 8 people easily. So rookie wife puts the bottle on the side and very quickly and awkwardly gets in on the other side. Mrs. Karpis is squeezing my arm under the water, and I can tell she is not very comfortable with company in the hot tub. Up to this point, she had been topless around people at a decent distance, in the dark. But now, though under the bubbles, people were in her space.

So rookie husband comes back with plastic solo cups from the outdoor patio area. I purposefully distracted myself with a leaf in my wife's hair when he got in the hot tub. Again, personal space...male body parts...not what I signed up for. :X

So rookie wife hands us the cups and she leans over to pour in each glass. Mrs. Karpis is down in the hot tub so that all you see is her head sticking up. :lmao: We had some awkward small talk about where we had eaten dinner, when we were leaving, etc. They honestly were nice people, but the circumstances made for a strange interaction. So if we had bathing suits on, my wife probably would have done a, "it's late, I'm ready for bed" routine and politely excused us to the room. But, of course, we're naked.

After a glass of wine, Mrs. Karpis relaxes a little. She's not the best conversationalist with strangers, but she was trying to appear to not be uncomfortable. So we continue small talk, and eventually rookie wife slides over in front of rookie husband and he wraps his arms around her.

At this point, Mrs. Karpis looks at me and asks if I want to get in the pool. Rookie wife says, "I'm sorry...we just kinda invited ourselves in didn't we?" Mrs. Karpis plays it off and says no, she has been in too long and is just getting hot.

Rookie wife says, "oh, let me turn the heater off." The hot tub has a 3-button control - jets, spa, and heater. Each operates a separate part. So rookie wife reaches back behind her and attempts to turn the heater off. Instantly, the jets stop.

And there we are, basically sitting in a large bathtub, fully naked. :eek:

 
The hot tub is custom built, not a pre-fab deal, and it has seating all the way around. Could fit 8 people easily. So rookie wife puts the bottle on the side and very quickly and awkwardly gets in on the other side. Mrs. Karpis is squeezing my arm under the water, and I can tell she is not very comfortable with company in the hot tub. Up to this point, she had been topless around people at a decent distance, in the dark. But now, though under the bubbles, people were in her space.

So rookie husband comes back with plastic solo cups from the outdoor patio area. I purposefully distracted myself with a leaf in my wife's hair when he got in the hot tub. Again, personal space...male body parts...not what I signed up for. :X

So rookie wife hands us the cups and she leans over to pour in each glass. Mrs. Karpis is down in the hot tub so that all you see is her head sticking up. :lmao: We had some awkward small talk about where we had eaten dinner, when we were leaving, etc. They honestly were nice people, but the circumstances made for a strange interaction. So if we had bathing suits on, my wife probably would have done a, "it's late, I'm ready for bed" routine and politely excused us to the room. But, of course, we're naked.

After a glass of wine, Mrs. Karpis relaxes a little. She's not the best conversationalist with strangers, but she was trying to appear to not be uncomfortable. So we continue small talk, and eventually rookie wife slides over in front of rookie husband and he wraps his arms around her.

At this point, Mrs. Karpis looks at me and asks if I want to get in the pool. Rookie wife says, "I'm sorry...we just kinda invited ourselves in didn't we?" Mrs. Karpis plays it off and says no, she has been in too long and is just getting hot.

Rookie wife says, "oh, let me turn the heater off." The hot tub has a 3-button control - jets, spa, and heater. Each operates a separate part. So rookie wife reaches back behind her and attempts to turn the heater off. Instantly, the jets stop.

And there we are, basically sitting in a large bathtub, fully naked. :eek:
:mellow: Did you perform any tricks with your weenis? That's what I always did in the bath. Would have showed rookie couple my "Mushroom Island" trick right off the bat.

 
Rookie wife says, "oh, let me turn the heater off." The hot tub has a 3-button control - jets, spa, and heater. Each operates a separate part. So rookie wife reaches back behind her and attempts to turn the heater off. Instantly, the jets stop.

And there we are, basically sitting in a large bathtub, fully naked. :eek:
:lmao: This is awesome. In.

 
Rookie wife says, "oh, let me turn the heater off." The hot tub has a 3-button control - jets, spa, and heater. Each operates a separate part. So rookie wife reaches back behind her and attempts to turn the heater off. Instantly, the jets stop.

And there we are, basically sitting in a large bathtub, fully naked. :eek:
:lmao: This is awesome. In.
Did you reach for her knobs?
 
Who the hell is Athol Kay and why would you care if they blogged that "Ray Karpis" from "Spain" went to a clothing optional pool at a B&B?

 
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The hot tub is custom built, not a pre-fab deal, and it has seating all the way around. Could fit 8 people easily. So rookie wife puts the bottle on the side and very quickly and awkwardly gets in on the other side. Mrs. Karpis is squeezing my arm under the water, and I can tell she is not very comfortable with company in the hot tub. Up to this point, she had been topless around people at a decent distance, in the dark. But now, though under the bubbles, people were in her space.

So rookie husband comes back with plastic solo cups from the outdoor patio area. I purposefully distracted myself with a leaf in my wife's hair when he got in the hot tub. Again, personal space...male body parts...not what I signed up for. :X

So rookie wife hands us the cups and she leans over to pour in each glass. Mrs. Karpis is down in the hot tub so that all you see is her head sticking up. :lmao: We had some awkward small talk about where we had eaten dinner, when we were leaving, etc. They honestly were nice people, but the circumstances made for a strange interaction. So if we had bathing suits on, my wife probably would have done a, "it's late, I'm ready for bed" routine and politely excused us to the room. But, of course, we're naked.

After a glass of wine, Mrs. Karpis relaxes a little. She's not the best conversationalist with strangers, but she was trying to appear to not be uncomfortable. So we continue small talk, and eventually rookie wife slides over in front of rookie husband and he wraps his arms around her.

At this point, Mrs. Karpis looks at me and asks if I want to get in the pool. Rookie wife says, "I'm sorry...we just kinda invited ourselves in didn't we?" Mrs. Karpis plays it off and says no, she has been in too long and is just getting hot.

Rookie wife says, "oh, let me turn the heater off." The hot tub has a 3-button control - jets, spa, and heater. Each operates a separate part. So rookie wife reaches back behind her and attempts to turn the heater off. Instantly, the jets stop.

And there we are, basically sitting in a large bathtub, fully naked. :eek:
How come those guys are the rookies when you guys are just as inexperienced at this sort of thing? Did you qualify as veterans because you got in the hot tub first?
 
The hot tub is custom built, not a pre-fab deal, and it has seating all the way around. Could fit 8 people easily. So rookie wife puts the bottle on the side and very quickly and awkwardly gets in on the other side. Mrs. Karpis is squeezing my arm under the water, and I can tell she is not very comfortable with company in the hot tub. Up to this point, she had been topless around people at a decent distance, in the dark. But now, though under the bubbles, people were in her space.

So rookie husband comes back with plastic solo cups from the outdoor patio area. I purposefully distracted myself with a leaf in my wife's hair when he got in the hot tub. Again, personal space...male body parts...not what I signed up for. :X

So rookie wife hands us the cups and she leans over to pour in each glass. Mrs. Karpis is down in the hot tub so that all you see is her head sticking up. :lmao: We had some awkward small talk about where we had eaten dinner, when we were leaving, etc. They honestly were nice people, but the circumstances made for a strange interaction. So if we had bathing suits on, my wife probably would have done a, "it's late, I'm ready for bed" routine and politely excused us to the room. But, of course, we're naked.

After a glass of wine, Mrs. Karpis relaxes a little. She's not the best conversationalist with strangers, but she was trying to appear to not be uncomfortable. So we continue small talk, and eventually rookie wife slides over in front of rookie husband and he wraps his arms around her.

At this point, Mrs. Karpis looks at me and asks if I want to get in the pool. Rookie wife says, "I'm sorry...we just kinda invited ourselves in didn't we?" Mrs. Karpis plays it off and says no, she has been in too long and is just getting hot.

Rookie wife says, "oh, let me turn the heater off." The hot tub has a 3-button control - jets, spa, and heater. Each operates a separate part. So rookie wife reaches back behind her and attempts to turn the heater off. Instantly, the jets stop.

And there we are, basically sitting in a large bathtub, fully naked. :eek:
How come those guys are the rookies when you guys are just as inexperienced at this sort of thing? Did you qualify as veterans because you got in the hot tub first?
I was wondering the same thing - the rookies in this case seem like savvy vets. Oh, and just to reassure, if the water got clear right away, it was pretty clean.

 
It's Friday. Have something to look forward to tomorrow cause I'm not doing any work on the last day before a 2 week vacation :)

 
Stand up, give them the mangina, lock eyes with strange male, and ask "would you #### me? I'd #### me.". That'd be my next move.

 
Happy Friday! :cool:

A few housekeeping items before a final report:

You made love to your wife in front of other people? Wasn't that....weird?
If by "weird" you mean "awesome"...then yes. Honestly, as I said, I don't really think they could see us. If anything, maybe an occasional glimpse of us from the shoulders up. That said, the fact they were 10 feet away added a level of excitement we'd not had before.
Congrats on enjoying yourself but I don't think I would dig other people checking out my work. I don't get the whole voyeur thing but to each his own I guess.
Been years, but I've actually been there and you don't really care about the others at that point--it can be pretty special. The particular incident that comes to mind we were hanging on a floating dock in the middle of a small lake, drinking heavy with about 20 other party folks, late night, and simply random coupling going on. There were many others though--we're talking late '60s early '70s here.
 
"Um, wrong button."

The next moments were in slow motion. The events that were transpiring, though making my wife uneasy, were pretty titillating for me. I was titillated. I was sporting wood. :mellow:

In my moment of semi-panic, I slide my wife over in front of me. It seemed like an eternity but just as the water was settling and things were coming into view, rookie wife finds the button (not a euphemism) and turns the jets back on.

We all bust out laughing, and the tension level is cut in half.

 
"Um, wrong button."The next moments were in slow motion. The events that were transpiring, though making my wife uneasy, were pretty titillating for me. I was titillated. I was sporting wood. :mellow: In my moment of semi-panic, I slide my wife over in front of me. It seemed like an eternity but just as the water was settling and things were coming into view, rookie wife finds the button (not a euphemism) and turns the jets back on. We all bust out laughing, and the tension level is cut in half.
:popcorn:
 
"Um, wrong button."The next moments were in slow motion. The events that were transpiring, though making my wife uneasy, were pretty titillating for me. I was titillated. I was sporting wood. :mellow: In my moment of semi-panic, I slide my wife over in front of me. It seemed like an eternity but just as the water was settling and things were coming into view, rookie wife finds the button (not a euphemism) and turns the jets back on. We all bust out laughing, and the tension level is cut in half.
I'm not one to criticize the telling of a story. Frankly, I couldn't care less if it's true or not, and I don't really get the people who feel the need to interrupt even a little bit of an effort to provide entertainment with complaints about lack of links and their inability to suspend disbelief for 5 minutes. But it took you the better part of 16 hours to write THIS?
 

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