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Describe your first sexual experience using a song title (1 Viewer)

Homer J Simpson

Homer J Simpson

I don't push
Mine, You Keep A Knockin' by Little Richard...but not for the reason you might think.

Sophomore year in HS I was dating a fine little freshman filly named Dana. Well at the time, both of my parents worked, and so did hers. So occosionally, I'd have my friend drop us both off at my house after school and she would tell her mom to pick her up there on her way home from work, which gave us about 90 minutes of getting-to-know-you time. This was a wonderful set up that I did not take advantage of nearly enough. Anyway, on the day we decide to actually do the deed, my buddy drops us off and as he's backing out of the driveway, gives a "Hey Peej, call when you're done!" which really set the romantic mood. Anyway, things are going swimmingly in the boudoir of the young Homer J...nakedness has been achieved...plenty of time still left on the clock as Dana's mom generally got there a little before 5...hot and heavy preliminary action is taking place--I was a cunnilingus champ even at the tender age of 15...finally, penetration commences and a glorious light from the heavens is shining upon Wychwood Lane...when suddenly there is knocking on the door. Oh ####, mom got off work early. :angry:

She proceeds to knock on the door for the next five friggin' minutes as we pretend we're not there. Finally she leaves and the action resumes, leading to its wonderful, life-changing conclusion. I

So there's my story. Fittingly enough with the rest of my life, it was a comedy of errors that somehow turned out for the best. :thumbup:

 
BTW, there's one rule here.

DO NOT JUST LINK TO YOUTUBE WITHOUT PUTTING THE SONG TITLE IN THE POST.

Seriously, I will hate you forever if you do that.

 
If anyone can think of a girl in a poodle skirt and a guy on Halloween dressed as a glam rocker getting busted by the cops on the side of a road in a Dodge something, you win.

I don't think there's a song for that. Other than hipsters suck even in the late 80's.

Halloween.

Maybe this...?

NIke A Go Go

eta* I'm going with Nike-a-Go-Go. Much more appropriate.

eta2* Second sexual experience...

Stephanie Says

Much better

 
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1. First one ever....Beat It...Michael Jackson.

2. First with a female partner...Grease...Frankie Vali (I actually though it was the Bee Gees, but whatever). I worked at McDonalds, got to her house after work, and did the deed while her parents were gone. All I can remember is smelling like hot grease fom the fryer and polyester from my uniform. Good times.

 
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Back Door Man

We were 16, at her house after school. Her mom was upstairs making dinner. The g/f told her not to bother us when we were downstairs, and I put all of my trust in her powers of persuasion. Between the act itself and being nervous as hell listening for the door to the basement to open, it's a rush which to this day still has not been matched. It came about because she wanted to remain a virgin -- bless her heart.

 
Tootin baby's bathtub song

Now hear me out....

It was a hotel party so me and this chick went into the bathroom for some privacy. It wasn't one of those fancy 3 star hotels so the bathroom was pretty small. Our decision making wasn't the best at this point. We started with her on top of me while I was sitting on the toilet but my back hurt from the lid against the tank and my butt started to get numb and her feet couldn't reach the floor to really get any traction so we jumped into the shower. "Brilliant idea!" I said to myself. "Self, shower sex is what Skinemax has prepared me for!" I was wrong.

I was so much taller than her so our awkward teenage attempts at shower sex positions were, well, awkward and somewhat painful. We're lucky we didn't slip and bust our heads on the ceramic. She finally laid down in the tub and I started going to town, with the shower still spraying my back (we thought that was sexy :lmao: ). Somehow my foot tripped the drain plug and the tub started to fill with water. A solid minute and a half into the deed the water level reached our friction point. Between the splashing and the periodic sound of a ShopVac on your forearm, it was too much for my virgin wang. GB her she told me she came but I knew better.

We did it again later that night after everyone had passed out, this time on the bed. It was so much more comfortable.

 
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strykerpks said:
Tootin baby's bathtub song

Now hear me out....

It was a hotel party so me and this chick went into the bathroom for some privacy. It wasn't one of those fancy 3 star hotels so the bathroom was pretty small. Our decision making wasn't the best at this point. We started with her on top of me while I was sitting on the toilet but my back hurt from the lid against the tank and my butt started to get numb and her feet couldn't reach the floor to really get any traction so we jumped into the shower. "Brilliant idea!" I said to myself. "Self, shower sex is what Skinemax has prepared me for!" I was wrong.

I was so much taller than her so our awkward teenage attempts at shower sex positions were, well, awkward and somewhat painful. We're lucky we didn't slip and bust our heads on the ceramic. She finally laid down in the tub and I started going to town, with the shower still spraying my back (we thought that was sexy :lmao: ). Somehow my foot tripped the drain plug and the tub started to fill with water. A solid minute and a half into the deed the water level reached our friction point. Between the splashing and the periodic sound of a ShopVac on your forearm, it was too much for my virgin wang. GB her she told me she came but I knew better.

We did it again later that night after everyone had passed out, this time on the bed. It was so much more comfortable.
Click to expand...
:lmao:

 
Come to my Window by Melissa Etheridge.

Was dating my high school girlfriend for about 9 months or so when we decided we wanted to do it. Once you make that decision you want it to happen like right now. We didn't want to do it in a car, so we needed some alone time in a house. Although we usually had a decent amount of time alone together for some weird reason this particular week we had none, so so after a few days she told me just wait until 11 and then come to her bathroom window and sneak in because she had figured out that she could get the screen out and the window was big enough for me to sneak in. So I did. And we did. And it was glorious, though a bit scary since her parents were right upstairs and her brother's room was right next to hers.

Anyway that song was really popular at the time so we had a lot of laughs whenever it came on.

 
Zombie - The Cranberries.

Awkward, clumsy, slightly violent, overly redundant, and I'm sure parents were weeping somewhere.

Schlzm

 
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Mrs Robinson

I was 17, she was 33

That was 27 years ago

She is a friend on Facebook...lmao

 
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Serious answer??

"Smoking in the boys room"??

It was my sister's friend and my sister would get pissed because she wanted to come over all the time, but to see me.

So she came over to "hang out with my sister" and we had been getting close for awhile.. Nobody home but my sister.. I took the girl into my parents master bathroom

right down the hall from my room. We were laying on the floor of the bathroom and she gave me the green light. :excited: I had to run to my room to grab a condom..

I can't remember now why we were in my parents bathroom instead of my room.. So I grab a towel to wrap around me while I run down the hallway to my room.. As I

exit my parents door, my sister comes out of her bedroom (between mine and my parents) and sees me with a towel wrapped around my waist with a full on chubby

leading the way... She yells "OH GEEZ!" and goes in her room and slams the door...

I rush back to the bathroom with condom in hand.. in my haste to put it on, I put it on "inside out".. so instead of rolling right down nice and easy, I had to grab it by the ring,

stretch it out and unroll it from the inside.. This is the first condom I had ever put on, so I remember thinking "Jesus, what a pain in the ###!" Got it on just in time,

pretty much finished about the same exact time as initial penetration.. :bag:

But we dated for awhile, and got REALLY good at it after that ;)

 
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6dzwWOSwNY8

Cell Therapy by Goodie Mob

lol ok the thread title doesn't make sense but the chorus does... "Whos that peekin in my window?"

We both planned to goto a hotel for our first time. We were both nervous as hell. Heck I felt like I was gonna throw up (some might like that). We both chickened out that night and went home. A week later, she said she doesnt wanna plan it, she just wants it to be spontaneous. I was like ok. So we went to one of those lookout places in our car and climbed into the back seat and did it for the first time. Next thing I know theres a light shining on my ### and there were two creepy guys outside with a flashlight looking in all the car windows and cheering people on. :bag:

 
Three Times a Lady

I was 16 and a senior in HS. My girlfriend and I had been together about a month but had never 'gone all the way'. I was over at her house one night when her parents were gone and we had planned it for that night.

The first time I lasted about 5 seconds. :bag:

The second time was longer although probably still not more than a few minutes. :bag:

The third time (ahhhh, to be young again) was going along great until we heard the garage door open - her parents had arrived back home. I grabbed my clothes and ran to the bathroom to get dressed. She quickly got dressed and ran to the family room to turn on the TV so we could pretend that's what we were doing. I remember her mom made some comment to her about her face being red but I'd like to think they didn't know what we had been doing.

 
Loser by Beck

We were both 13 and friends for a long time. She caught her older sister doing the deed and thought she wanted to try it herself. One day, after playing some basketball at the park, we went to her house to get a drink. I thought that was kind of weird since we usually hit the corner store to get our stuff, but whatever, I guessed she didn't have any cash.

We get there and get a soda and Cheetos and she starts to tell me about how she caught her sister the night before. I start to laugh until she said 'I thought it looked like fun and thought maybe we should try it'. To say I was shocked probably doesn't do the description justice, I almost literally fell over. My legs went weak and my brain kind of just turned off. I think I suavely responded 'Uh, ok' and we went upstairs.

God bless her, she must have watched Skinamax the night before because she was trying everything because she wanted 'do it right'. About the only thing I did right was getting her off orally (thanks to the porno tape I found a year earlier) because I think I lasted about 10 seconds once inside the holiest of holies.

We still remained friends after, and did it a few more times, but after she moved, I never saw her again until about a year ago, with her husband and three kids in a Walgreens.

 
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