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GM's Thread About Everything/GM's Thread About Nothing (2 Viewers)

Next question (hypothetical): Can someone withhold their thanks from any veteran who is gay married? I have a few friends whose heads might explode from contradictory interests.

 
Idiot Boxer said:
Next question (hypothetical): Can someone withhold their thanks from any veteran who is gay married? I have a few friends whose heads might explode from contradictory interests.
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What about married but gay (as opposed to married and gay.) I'm asking for an architect friend.

 
BobbyLayne said:
Binky The Doormat said:
BobbyLayne said:
The resident old fat #### in Sales sent our buy rate to a customer as a proposal.

He emailed to ask for pricing on something. Not sure why he didn't ask his manager who sits 15 feet away, has shared the price book with him, has shown about eight times where it is on DropBox cloud storage, but whatever. I was in meetings and not monitoring emails. Somebody in Operations was CCed and so they pulled up the last price sheet they had (superceded, new COGS is higher.) Sent it to resident fat #### with the caveat "These are old prices, you'll want to confirm with Finance. Also, this is our cost - I'm not sure what our markup is." Resident fat #### forwarded it to the prospect from his iPhone 20 seconds later.

:confetti:
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Please forward his next communication with the client.
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It started out with I'm sorry. He was kind enough to not only send the revised retail pricing, but also our revised COGS and margin.

Not. Making. This. Up.
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Pretty much the only play once he'd spilled the beans. Anything else would promote distrust.

 
BobbyLayne said:
Binky The Doormat said:
BobbyLayne said:
The resident old fat #### in Sales sent our buy rate to a customer as a proposal.

He emailed to ask for pricing on something. Not sure why he didn't ask his manager who sits 15 feet away, has shared the price book with him, has shown about eight times where it is on DropBox cloud storage, but whatever. I was in meetings and not monitoring emails. Somebody in Operations was CCed and so they pulled up the last price sheet they had (superceded, new COGS is higher.) Sent it to resident fat #### with the caveat "These are old prices, you'll want to confirm with Finance. Also, this is our cost - I'm not sure what our markup is." Resident fat #### forwarded it to the prospect from his iPhone 20 seconds later.

:confetti:
Click to expand...
Please forward his next communication with the client.
Click to expand...
It started out with I'm sorry. He was kind enough to not only send the revised retail pricing, but also our revised COGS and margin.Not. Making. This. Up.
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"I don't think you're Penske material, tubby."
 
I've lived in KY my whole life and have never heard of observing Jefferson Davis' birthday, but then again, if it wasn't for bourbon, I'd napalm everything south of Lexington.

News of the day: Tried to replace an iPad 2 screen for a friend at work. That was a mistake.

 
BobbyLayne said:
Binky The Doormat said:
BobbyLayne said:
The resident old fat #### in Sales sent our buy rate to a customer as a proposal.

He emailed to ask for pricing on something. Not sure why he didn't ask his manager who sits 15 feet away, has shared the price book with him, has shown about eight times where it is on DropBox cloud storage, but whatever. I was in meetings and not monitoring emails. Somebody in Operations was CCed and so they pulled up the last price sheet they had (superceded, new COGS is higher.) Sent it to resident fat #### with the caveat "These are old prices, you'll want to confirm with Finance. Also, this is our cost - I'm not sure what our markup is." Resident fat #### forwarded it to the prospect from his iPhone 20 seconds later.

:confetti:
Click to expand...
Please forward his next communication with the client.
Click to expand...
It started out with I'm sorry. He was kind enough to not only send the revised retail pricing, but also our revised COGS and margin.Not. Making. This. Up.
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Guy should be fired or demoted

 
It's 11:30 here. I've killed 4 mice with one trap under my kitchen sink since 9:15. SNAP!!! > discard dead rodent > reset > SNAP!!! The key? Tootsie rolls. Chew them up to soften, form around the trigger mechanism, they can't lick it off.

We've killed 15 since last Monday. I think I have a mouse problem.

 
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mr roboto said:
It's 11:30 here. I've killed 4 mice with one trap under my kitchen sink since 9:15. SNAP!!! > discard dead rodent > reset > SNAP!!! The key? Tootsie rolls. Chew them up to soften, form around the trigger mechanism, they can't lick it off.

We've killed 15 since last Monday. I think I have a mouse problem.
Click to expand...
Instructions unclear. Tongue now caught in mousetrap.

 
mr roboto said:
It's 11:30 here. I've killed 4 mice with one trap under my kitchen sink since 9:15. SNAP!!! > discard dead rodent > reset > SNAP!!! The key? Tootsie rolls. Chew them up to soften, form around the trigger mechanism, they can't lick it off.

We've killed 15 since last Monday. I think I have a mouse problem.
Click to expand...
Have you had to chase any and murder them in cold blood though?

 
BobbyLayne said:
Idiot Boxer said:
What's the official stance on veteran's of the confederate army?

Do our remembrances include them?
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Nope. They also never matriculated the Confederate veterans into the Federal Pension system.

The South being what it is, they did have state pensions for Confederates and their dependents.

They also had their own holiday, called Confederate Decoration Day, Confederate Memorial Day, Confederate Remembrance Day and Confederate Heroes Day, depending on where you live.

Sorry, did I say had? Still observed.

  • Alabama - Last Monday in April, state paid holiday, state offices are closed.
  • Florida April 26. When April 26 is a Sunday, it is recognized the following Monday.
  • Georgia Last Monday in April, state paid holiday, state offices are closed.
  • Kentucky June 3 - Jefferson Davis' birthday. Overlooks they were never in the CSA, but let's not be too picky.
  • Louisiana June 3 - Jefferson Davis' birthday.
  • Mississippi Last Monday in April, state paid holiday, state offices may be closed, at the discretion of the state agency or department heads.
  • North Carolina May 10 - date of the death of Confederate General Thomas Jonathan "Stonewall" Jackson in 1863 and the capture of Confederate President Jefferson Davis in 1865. Yeah, that's not weird.
  • South Carolina May 10 See remarks at North Carolina. (Like most other holidays, the observed date shifts to Friday if it falls on Saturday, and to Monday if it falls on Sunday.)
  • Tennessee June 3 - Jefferson Davis' birthday.
  • Texas January 19 - Confederate Heroes Day. In 1973, the Texas legislature combined the previously official state holidays of Robert E. Lee's and Jefferson Davis' birthdays into a single "Confederate Heroes Day" to honor all who had served the Southern Cause. In some years, this date may coincide with Martin Luther King, Jr. Day. State offices are partially staffed in recognition of this day. January 19 2015 January 19 2016 January 19 2017
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Southron forever, brothers.
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:rolleyes:

Never even heard of celebrating Jefferson Davis' birthday...and I've lived in Louisiana almost all of my life

 
Leeroy Jenkins said:
mr roboto said:
It's 11:30 here. I've killed 4 mice with one trap under my kitchen sink since 9:15. SNAP!!! > discard dead rodent > reset > SNAP!!! The key? Tootsie rolls. Chew them up to soften, form around the trigger mechanism, they can't lick it off.

We've killed 15 since last Monday. I think I have a mouse problem.
Click to expand...
Have you had to chase any and murder them in cold blood though?
Click to expand...
This morning under the sink in the kitchen, there's an empty trap that's been triggered, blood everywhere including bloody tiny footprints, and no mouse...
 
mr roboto said:
Leeroy Jenkins said:
mr roboto said:
It's 11:30 here. I've killed 4 mice with one trap under my kitchen sink since 9:15. SNAP!!! > discard dead rodent > reset > SNAP!!! The key? Tootsie rolls. Chew them up to soften, form around the trigger mechanism, they can't lick it off.

We've killed 15 since last Monday. I think I have a mouse problem.
Click to expand...
Have you had to chase any and murder them in cold blood though?
Click to expand...
This morning under the sink in the kitchen, there's an empty trap that's been triggered, blood everywhere including bloody tiny footprints, and no mouse...
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GET OUT OF THE HOUSE!!

 
So a guy was murdered in front of my office at 1am this morning. Shooter escaped on a motorcycle.

I was home asleep and my bike's in the shop.

 
Limp Ditka said:
http://robbreport.com/wine-spirits-cigars/great-bourbon-heist-sordid-tale-stolen-pappy-van-winkle-whiskey?utm_channel=social&utm_source=facebook
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On March 11, 2015, Franklin County officers were executing a search warrant at the home of Gilbert “Toby” Curtsinger, a trusted and long-standing employee of Buffalo Trace Distillery, as part of a separate drug case. Much to their surprise, they discovered five barrels of Wild Turkey bourbon and bottles of Pappy Van Winkle along with anabolic steroids. Confiscating the contraband, as well as cell phones and computer hard drives, detectives then worked with Kentucky Attorney General Jack Conway’s Cyber Crimes Unit. Digital forensics on the collected devices revealed that Curtsinger was the center of an alleged crime syndicate that had been operating from January 2008 until April 7, 2015.
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Nice work, cops. Way to stop him from running a crime syndicate a mere month after you arrested him.

 
mr roboto said:
Leeroy Jenkins said:
mr roboto said:
It's 11:30 here. I've killed 4 mice with one trap under my kitchen sink since 9:15. SNAP!!! > discard dead rodent > reset > SNAP!!! The key? Tootsie rolls. Chew them up to soften, form around the trigger mechanism, they can't lick it off.

We've killed 15 since last Monday. I think I have a mouse problem.
Click to expand...
Have you had to chase any and murder them in cold blood though?
Click to expand...
This morning under the sink in the kitchen, there's an empty trap that's been triggered, blood everywhere including bloody tiny footprints, and no mouse...
Click to expand...
Opened up our big rubbermade tub which we store our dog food in the other morning, and a mouse was down inside of it. Fell in and couldn't get out. BB gun took care of him.

 
Mr. Pickles said:
General Malaise said:
Cos has an office?
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Was a little surprised as well. I assumed he was a trust fund kind of guy.
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AUSTIN (KXAN) — Austin police officers are looking for a someone who shot and killed a man in South Austin early Thursday morning.

Police say a man in his 50s was shot at the Absolute Stor-N-Lock storage facility in the 1600 block of Matthews Lane. The call came in to officers from several witnesses around 1:08 a.m.

The victim was taken to the hospital where he died a short time later. Police say the suspect took off on a motorcycle and they are actively searching for him at this time.

The crime scene is currently secure and police tell KXAN they don’t believe the public is in any danger. However, if you see anything suspicious you are asked to call police.
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Office, huh?

 
General Malaise said:
Mr. Pickles said:
General Malaise said:
Cos has an office?
Click to expand...
Was a little surprised as well. I assumed he was a trust fund kind of guy.
Click to expand...
AUSTIN (KXAN) — Austin police officers are looking for a someone who shot and killed a man in South Austin early Thursday morning.

Police say a man in his 50s was shot at the Absolute Stor-N-Lock storage facility in the 1600 block of Matthews Lane. The call came in to officers from several witnesses around 1:08 a.m.

The victim was taken to the hospital where he died a short time later. Police say the suspect took off on a motorcycle and they are actively searching for him at this time.

The crime scene is currently secure and police tell KXAN they don’t believe the public is in any danger. However, if you see anything suspicious you are asked to call police.
Click to expand...
Office, huh?
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It's where he stores all his movie props, for well....producing.

 
General Malaise said:
Mr. Pickles said:
General Malaise said:
Cos has an office?
Click to expand...
Was a little surprised as well. I assumed he was a trust fund kind of guy.
Click to expand...
AUSTIN (KXAN) Austin police officers are looking for a someone who shot and killed a man in South Austin early Thursday morning.

Police say a man in his 50s was shot at the Absolute Stor-N-Lock storage facility in the 1600 block of Matthews Lane. The call came in to officers from several witnesses around 1:08 a.m.

The victim was taken to the hospital where he died a short time later. Police say the suspect took off on a motorcycle and they are actively searching for him at this time.

The crime scene is currently secure and police tell KXAN they dont believe the public is in any danger. However, if you see anything suspicious you are asked to call police.
Click to expand...
Office, huh?
Click to expand...
Its an old portable bank building. Two doors, 200 sf, a bathroom and six bulletproof windows plopped down between a bunch of low rent storage storage units. Beyond unassuming, like where you see mob guys officed up in the movies or The Wire. I love it.

 
cosjobs said:
General Malaise said:
Mr. Pickles said:
General Malaise said:
Cos has an office?
Click to expand...
Was a little surprised as well. I assumed he was a trust fund kind of guy.
Click to expand...
AUSTIN (KXAN) Austin police officers are looking for a someone who shot and killed a man in South Austin early Thursday morning.

Police say a man in his 50s was shot at the Absolute Stor-N-Lock storage facility in the 1600 block of Matthews Lane. The call came in to officers from several witnesses around 1:08 a.m.

The victim was taken to the hospital where he died a short time later. Police say the suspect took off on a motorcycle and they are actively searching for him at this time.

The crime scene is currently secure and police tell KXAN they dont believe the public is in any danger. However, if you see anything suspicious you are asked to call police.
Click to expand...
Office, huh?
Click to expand...
Its an old portable bank building. Two doors, 200 sf, a bathroom and six bulletproof windows plopped down between a bunch of low rent storage storage units. Beyond unassuming, like where you see mob guys officed up in the movies or The Wire. I love it.
Click to expand...
How often does the train come by?

 
For those that don't venture much into the Vasectomy in the AM thread....

So............I dropped off my 'specimen' today. I *THOUGHT* I would just waltz in, knock three times on a secret door, hand off my deposit, and vacate like a guy robbing a bank. That's not what happened at all.

You have 60 minutes to load the cup and get it to the lab. From the moment I dribbled my venom into the plastic jar it felt like one of those movies where I was racing against a bomb timer and every possible obstacle that could stand in my way appeared out of no-where. Knocks on the bathroom door interrupting my solo dance? Check. My daughter wanting me to color with her before leaving the house? Check. Bad traffic? Check.

With 30 minutes to spare, I waltzed into the clinic, asked the front desk where I could drop off my 'sample' and was told to check in with the lab and have a seat. A seat??? Nobody told me about a seat. Certainly not a seat in a crowded waiting room where all eyes seemed to focus in on the clear ziplock bag containing a see-thru cup that wasn't holding much of anything except a small glob of splooge. I think I saw some woman clutch her daughter closer to her as if I was going to start throwing it around like Miggs from Silence of the Lambs.

What made matters worse was this high-strung bald dude who made a scene because he was waiting for TWENTY WHOLE MINUTES to get his blood drawn. Up and down he paced, yelling at the front desk, demanding to speak to - and I'm not making this up - an ombudsman. :lmao: I thought for years that was just some made up term by Mr. Pickles, but no no, this man repeated his request to speak to an ombudsman who could help advocate on his behalf. He made this commotion right in front of me, so whatever eyes were averted from my cup of goo were now squarely on the agitated man and the poor sonuvabeech behind him holding his jism.

Finally, a large lady emerged from the lab and in a voice that cut through fog said "FORREST!" I stood up, lowered my voice and said "hi, here's my sample", hoping she would pick up on the verbal cue to lower her voice. Oh no, Betty Humpter then blurted out for everybody to hear "WHEN DID YOU DO THE EJACULATION?" Ugh. I whispered out 7:45am and then hauled assssssss out of there. I contemplated kicking over a rope stand and throwing pennies, but I just got in my car and cried a little.
Click to expand...
 
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