GM's Thread About Everything/GM's Thread About Nothing (7 Viewers)

[kevzilla]

 

[strykerpks]

Guys, I might be drunk. TWP accepted

 

[belljr]

 Carla Gugino

So underrated

She still looks good in the new Showtime show - Roadies

 

[roadkill1292]

I think I'll lust after Carla Gugino until she's 80.

 

[Osaurus]

Solid in Son in Law

 

[bentley]

Solid in Son in Law

I think she looks better now than she did then. Looks great in San Andreas and The Brink.

 

[belljr]

I'll take Sin City. thx

 

[mr. furley]

is she nekkid in any of those fine films?

 

[bentley]

is she nekkid in any of those fine films?

Sin City. Looks amazing.

 

[heckmanm]

dog logic

 

[mr roboto]

My wife's bewbs are glorious now that she's breastfeeding and I have a little ####### baby who gets all the action. 

 

[Thorn]

Told the genie joke a couple times over the weekend.  Two of ten people cried they laughed so hard.  Two others just gave a blank stare.  

 

[kevzilla]

My wife's bewbs are glorious now that she's breastfeeding and I have a little ####### baby who gets all the action. 

"Excuse me, is this nipple taken?"

 

[St. Louis Bob]

private to Tanner>  http://youtu.be/Izj2xo97D9k

 

[bud29]

Told the genie joke a couple times over the weekend.  Two of ten people cried they laughed so hard.  Two others just gave a blank stare.  

I'm 1 for 1 on the genie joke. Might just retire with a 100% success rate at this point, I dunno.

 

[Leroy Hoard]

I think I'll lust after Carla Gugino until she's 80.

me like

http://vignette1.wikia.nocookie.net/headhuntersholosuite/images/7/74/Carla_Gugino.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20110107172234

 

[Uruk-Hai]

Which one of you was this?!  

I thought it was Drifter when the video first started. 

 

[mr. furley]

prefer not to make fun until i know more about it.  can someone tell me what the #### is going on here?

 

[DA RAIDERS]

my neighbor with the 19 and 17 year old kids had a pool party yesterday.  a lot of kids showed up...a lot of them were 17-20 year old girls.    holy shiite.  hi homer!

 

[Slapdash]

College girls in sundresses and cowboy boots are God's gift to tailgating.

Few things in life better than this

 

[arrow1]

How bad's the line? Last week it backed up down 30 all the way to the I55 ramps. 

my neighbor with the 19 and 17 year old kids had a pool party yesterday.  a lot of kids showed up...a lot of them were 17-20 year old girls.    holy shiite.  hi homer!

 

[mr roboto]

my neighbor with the 19 and 17 year old kids had a pool party yesterday.  a lot of kids showed up...a lot of them were 17-20 year old girls.    holy shiite.  hi homer!

Meh too old amiright HJS?

 

[Sconch]

oh no https://streamable.com/oob1

 

[Sconch]

Dummy http://i.imgur.com/KURhsVX.gifv

 

[Homer J Simpson]

Meh too old amiright HJS?

My ability to throw out pedo jokes on the fly is quite solid. Today in a house meeting they were talking about going to a rodeo (Uni>hey) on Thursday and I wasn't really digging the idea.

Addict 1:  Dude, there's gonna be tons of chicks there.

Homer:  OK, count me in.

Group leader:  Yeah, but they'll all be like 16-18.

Homer:  I already said I'll go, no need for the hard sell.

 

[Sconch]

My ability to throw out pedo jokes on the fly is quite solid. Today in a house meeting they were talking about going to a rodeo (Uni>hey) on Thursday and I wasn't really digging the idea.

Addict 1:  Dude, there's gonna be tons of chicks there.

Homer:  OK, count me in.

Group leader:  Yeah, but they'll all be like 16-18.

Homer:  I already said I'll go, no need for the hard sell.

 

[Mr.Pack]

I thought it was Drifter when the video first started. 

Pretty sure it's furley

 

[mr. furley]

Pretty sure it's furley

ptsd for days

 

[IMAX 3D]

Had a deep fried moon pie for dessert

 

[Sconch]

According to Google the phrase "Deep Fried Moon Pie" can be found in the lyics to 2 Luke Bryan songs, 3 Florida-Georgia Line songs, and the name of Sam Hunt's upcoming album.

 

[Henry Ford]

According to Google the phrase "Deep Fried Moon Pie" can be found in the lyics to 2 Luke Bryan songs, 3 Florida-Georgia Line songs, and the name of Sam Hunt's upcoming album.

Also, the Paula Deen diabetes diagnosis under "relevant medical history."

 

[Abraham]

My friend says it isn't a joke because there isn't really a punchline. Nor is it a story since there is no real climax. "It's just a statement...a meandering 7 minute statement."  

 

[mr roboto]

My friend says it isn't a joke because there isn't really a punchline. Nor is it a story since there is no real climax. "It's just a statement...a meandering 7 minute statement."  

Your friend is a ####### ##### nozzle. 

 

[Henry Ford]

My friend says it isn't a joke because there isn't really a punchline. Nor is it a story since there is no real climax. "It's just a statement...a meandering 7 minute statement."  

Sounds like a woman's argument to me.

 

[Sconch]

My friend says it isn't a joke because there isn't really a punchline. Nor is it a story since there is no real climax. "It's just a statement...a meandering 7 minute statement."  

Your friend must be a hit at parties.

 

[Binky The Doormat]

My friend says it isn't a joke because there isn't really a punchline. Nor is it a story since there is no real climax. "It's just a statement...a meandering 7 minute statement."  

You should punch your friend in the nuts.

And then tell him there's no punch line to that either but its still funnier than ####.

 

[shuke]

My friend says it isn't a joke because there isn't really a punchline. Nor is it a story since there is no real climax. "It's just a statement...a meandering 7 minute statement."  

We'll need video of you delivering the punchline to ensure it's being done correctly.

 

[Thorn]

"friend" 

 

[belljr]

My genie joke

Spoiler

once there were two guys with black eyes, real shiners, sitting by eachother on an airplane. They both noticed that each had one, then finally one of them spoke up...

"ok man, this is weird. we both have black eyes and this quite a coincidence. I have to ask you, how did you get yours?"

the other man replied...

"well, its kind of a funny story. when i went up to the counter to buy my plane ticket, the girl behind the counter had a gorgeous rack. instead of saying 'i'd like 2 tickets to Pittsburgh', what slipped out was 'i'd like 2 tickets to TITSburgh'" and she slugged me.

so, after telling this story, he naturally asked the first man how he got his black eye. to which he replied.

"well, i guess my story is similar to yours. this morning i meant to ask my wife 'honey, please pass the salt' but what came out was


'##### YOU'VE RUINED MY LIFE!!!"'

 

[mr. furley]

 

[eoMMan]

Hey Tanner, what do you call a pile of kittens? You know, stacked up on one another?

A meowtain.

(crushes genie joke)

 

[Henry Ford]

Hey Tanner, what do you call a pile of kittens? You know, stacked up on one another?

A meowntain.

(crushes genie joke)

 

[Thorn]

what is wrong with you people?

 

[Sconch]

My genie joke

Spoiler

once there were two guys with black eyes, real shiners, sitting by eachother on an airplane. They both noticed that each had one, then finally one of them spoke up...

"ok man, this is weird. we both have black eyes and this quite a coincidence. I have to ask you, how did you get yours?"

the other man replied...

"well, its kind of a funny story. when i went up to the counter to buy my plane ticket, the girl behind the counter had a gorgeous rack. instead of saying 'i'd like 2 tickets to Pittsburgh', what slipped out was 'i'd like 2 tickets to TITSburgh'" and she slugged me.

so, after telling this story, he naturally asked the first man how he got his black eye. to which he replied.

"well, i guess my story is similar to yours. this morning i meant to ask my wife 'honey, please pass the salt' but what came out was


  Reveal hidden contents
'##### YOU'VE RUINED MY LIFE!!!"'

"That's a good one, Uncle Walt"

--Me, circa 1980

 

[Sconch]

what is wrong with you people?

Some people wouldn't know a good joke if it banged them all night long.

 

[Limp Ditka]

####### Walt

 

[5-ish Finkle]

That genie thing is pretty much the Cheap Trick of jokes.

 

[Bob Sacamano]

Another game for Milos!

Raonic ends Querrey's Cinderella run

share

Tennis 12m

Milos Raonic handles Sam Querrey in four sets, 6-4, 7-5, 5-7, 6-4 to advance the semifinals at Wimbledon.

 

[belljr]

"That's a good one, Uncle Walt"

--Me, circa 1980

more like 88 good sir

 

[Thorn]

more like 88 good sir

1888?