GM's Thread About Everything/GM's Thread About Nothing (8 Viewers)

[kevzilla]

JR peppering me with a million questions about what I actually do all day for a living. I don't even really know what it is. How am I supposed to explain it to a six year old?

Now at the Children's Museum. Delicate balance here between the positives of being surrounded by yoga pants MILFs and the negatives of having a million screaming kids around. Screaming kids currently in the lead.

And JR just hit Yuke in the head with a plastic frying pan in the pretend kitchen.

My wife doesn't understand what I do and why it matters at all. That's a good feeling.

Bentley doesn't know what he does. That's either frightening or awesome.

It seems to involve a lot of drinking, golf, and the ogling of hotties that are not his wife. Going with awesome here.

 

[bentley]

I make things happen. That's what I do.

 

[Abraham]

Bentley spends time in Laredo and Lubbock. That's critical stuff, muchachos.

 

[kevzilla]

Bentley spends time in Laredo and Lubbock. That's critical stuff, muchachos.

But away from Angrywife and the kids, and with the booze and random trashy chicks. Push?

 

[RedmondLonghorn]

Icelandic chick: tall, blonde, slutty, super clingy.

Icelandic chick was ahead on the scorecard until the last round.

 

[Tecumseh]

Had a good story but it hurts to type since I fell down drunk yesterday afternoon and sprained, pull, everything in my left hand.

there he is!

My wife has a lot of hot nurses at her work. Oh man. Me drunk around a lot of hot nurses was good times. I may never be invited to another work party again though. Guess I'll find out tomorrow after she gets home. Was pretty obnoxious.

My wife is convinced I'll leave her for a hot nurse once I graduate from RN school. I told her it's the vulnerable MILFs in the pediatric ward that she should worry about. She was not amused.

 

[cstu]

I'm doing an appraisal of an office building and one of the tenants is a law firm named, I kid you not, "Payne and Fears".

 

[cstu]

Had a good story but it hurts to type since I fell down drunk yesterday afternoon and sprained, pull, everything in my left hand.

there he is!

My wife has a lot of hot nurses at her work. Oh man. Me drunk around a lot of hot nurses was good times. I may never be invited to another work party again though. Guess I'll find out tomorrow after she gets home. Was pretty obnoxious.

My wife is convinced I'll leave her for a hot nurse once I graduate from RN school. I told her it's the vulnerable MILFs in the pediatric ward that she should worry about. She was not amused.

 

[Annyong]

I just signed my 4 year old up for his first year of soccer. I emphatically denied volunteering for any type of coaching. Thanks GM!

 

[El Floppo]

I just signed my 4 year old up for his first year of soccer. I emphatically denied volunteering for any type of coaching. Thanks GM!

coaching 4yos? this should be a class format, not a team. it's not a team.... right?

 

[Limp Ditka]

Cancer wins again

Uncle Don, RIP

 

[El Floppo]

Cancer wins again

Uncle Don, RIP

dammit.

rip uncle don... wait ... how did he pronounce it? important.

also... fu cancer.

 

[Limp Ditka]

rip uncle don... wait ... how did he pronounce it? important.

 

[Annyong]

I just signed my 4 year old up for his first year of soccer. I emphatically denied volunteering for any type of coaching. Thanks GM!

coaching 4yos? this should be a class format, not a team. it's not a team.... right?

I'm gonna plead ignorance. I never played soccer. There's games every Saturday this spring. I'm assuming there's teams.

 

[Binky The Doormat]

I just signed my 4 year old up for his first year of soccer. I emphatically denied volunteering for any type of coaching. Thanks GM!

coaching 4yos? this should be a class format, not a team. it's not a team.... right?

Primate behavioral science lab.

Lab fees include: cuties, juice boxes, and store brand chewy granola bars (quaker oaks name brand extra fee)

 

[GroveDiesel]

Cancer wins again

Uncle Don, RIP

A friend posted on FB today that her 5 year old son was playing with his best friend Friday night, Saturday his little buddy ended up in the ER, Sunday he was diagnosed with acute Leukemia and today got his first chemo treatment.F cancer.

And RIP Uncle Don.

 

[Limp Ditka]

Cancer wins again

Uncle Don, RIP

A friend posted on FB today that her 5 year old son was playing with his best friend Friday night, Saturday his little buddy ended up in the ER, Sunday he was diagnosed with acute Leukemia and today got his first chemo treatment.

F cancer.

Ugh

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

Dammit to hell

 

[Uruk-Hai]

Cancer wins again

Uncle Don, RIP

Condolences, LD.

 

[El Floppo]

I just signed my 4 year old up for his first year of soccer. I emphatically denied volunteering for any type of coaching. Thanks GM!

coaching 4yos? this should be a class format, not a team. it's not a team.... right?

I'm gonna plead ignorance. I never played soccer. There's games every Saturday this spring. I'm assuming there's teams.

games are a waste of time for that age. but hopefully the kid has fun.

 

[Dan Lambskin]

I just signed my 4 year old up for his first year of soccer. I emphatically denied volunteering for any type of coaching. Thanks GM!

coaching 4yos? this should be a class format, not a team. it's not a team.... right?

I'm gonna plead ignorance. I never played soccer. There's games every Saturday this spring. I'm assuming there's teams.

I coached 3-4 year old soccer team once...once

 

[Binky The Doormat]

Cancer wins again

Uncle Don, RIP

A friend posted on FB today that her 5 year old son was playing with his best friend Friday night, Saturday his little buddy ended up in the ER, Sunday he was diagnosed with acute Leukemia and today got his first chemo treatment.F cancer.

And RIP Uncle Don.

5 yrs old. GDammit. Just makes you want to explode.

 

[Dan Lambskin]

Cancer wins again

Uncle Don, RIP

A friend posted on FB today that her 5 year old son was playing with his best friend Friday night, Saturday his little buddy ended up in the ER, Sunday he was diagnosed with acute Leukemia and today got his first chemo treatment.F cancer.

And RIP Uncle Don.

God dammit. #### cancer right in the #######

 

[kevzilla]

Gonna pour one for Uncle Don tonight.

 

[Uruk-Hai]

I just signed my 4 year old up for his first year of soccer. I emphatically denied volunteering for any type of coaching. Thanks GM!

coaching 4yos? this should be a class format, not a team. it's not a team.... right?

I'm gonna plead ignorance. I never played soccer. There's games every Saturday this spring. I'm assuming there's teams.

games are a waste of time for that age. but hopefully the kid has fun.

The light bulb will go off for one or two, but the rest will be eating bumble bees, watching airplanes fly over, and pissing on the goal. It's hilarious if you're not one of those parents like Marinovich's dad.

 

[kevzilla]

Eating Bumblebees is the name of my Counting Crows tribute band.

 

[kevzilla]

Drambuie and grapefruit juice a surprisingly good combo, would drink again.

 

[Annyong]

Drambuie and grapefruit juice a surprisingly good combo, would drink again.

weird

 

[bostonfred]

This is seven seconds and worth watching

https://youtu.be/74gTaRy5GWY

 

[Frostillicus]

I just signed my 4 year old up for his first year of soccer. I emphatically denied volunteering for any type of coaching. Thanks GM!

coaching my 5 year old and my 7 year old in basketball this year.

 

[kevzilla]

Drambuie and grapefruit juice a surprisingly good combo, would drink again.

weird

I looked it up. It's called a Golden Nail.

 

[Captain Quinoa]

I had a dream last night that I posted in here.

Now all my dream have come true!

Also my kids are pretty cool.

Bye!

 

[Chemical X]

sorry for your loss.

good luck with your kids.

 

[shuke]

CQ wait

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

This is seven seconds and worth watching

https://youtu.be/74gTaRy5GWY

That guy fell.

 

[Aerial Assault]

Do all youth sports start at obscene times on weekends? Asking for a friend without kids (yet).

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

Do all youth sports start at obscene times on weekends? Asking for a friend without kids (yet).

What's an obscene time? F O'Clock?

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

Worse Than Cholera is the name of my Butthole Surfers tribute band.

Mine is Ocean of Pink Eye

 

[General Malaise]

Do all youth sports start at obscene times on weekends? Asking for a friend without kids (yet).

Just depends, really. Personally speaking, I prefer having my games at 9am on Saturday morning so I can get them out of the way and enjoy a full day of college football. If I can get them all scheduled before noon, I'm a happy camper. I hate sitting around waiting for them.

Also, if you are thinking about coaching, consider joining the board of your local rec league, especially if the board has its monthly meetings at a pub. On top of the free beers, you tend to get preferential treatment with regards to your roster of players, practice location and times and game schedule.

 

[Aerial Assault]

Do all youth sports start at obscene times on weekends? Asking for a friend without kids (yet).

Just depends, really. Personally speaking, I prefer having my games at 9am on Saturday morning so I can get them out of the way and enjoy a full day of college football. If I can get them all scheduled before noon, I'm a happy camper. I hate sitting around waiting for them.

Also, if you are thinking about coaching, consider joining the board of your local rec league, especially if the board has its monthly meetings at a pub. On top of the free beers, you tend to get preferential treatment with regards to your roster of players, practice location and times and game schedule.

as to the coaching recommendation. I can't see myself ever doing that, but if so I will bear that in mind.

So, do any of these leagues start at, say, noon on Saturday? I can always DVR any sports, and am not a college football fan either (in fact, I'm surprisingly losing interest in college basketball).

 

[General Malaise]

Do all youth sports start at obscene times on weekends? Asking for a friend without kids (yet).

Just depends, really. Personally speaking, I prefer having my games at 9am on Saturday morning so I can get them out of the way and enjoy a full day of college football. If I can get them all scheduled before noon, I'm a happy camper. I hate sitting around waiting for them.

Also, if you are thinking about coaching, consider joining the board of your local rec league, especially if the board has its monthly meetings at a pub. On top of the free beers, you tend to get preferential treatment with regards to your roster of players, practice location and times and game schedule.

as to the coaching recommendation. I can't see myself ever doing that, but if so I will bear that in mind.

So, do any of these leagues start at, say, noon on Saturday? I can always DVR any sports, and am not a college football fan either (in fact, I'm surprisingly losing interest in college basketball).

What age are we talking about? What sport? What level?

From my experience, rec soccer is the easiest from a time commitment/scheduling standpoint. You have 1-2 practices a week that last 60-90 minutes and a game on Saturday. I'd say 90% of these games are played before 1pm on Saturday. I like morning games for the reasons cited above and have some influence as to my game schedule. If you are a parent and not a coach, well...you're at the mercy of the league scheduler.

Sundays are for competitive soccer. That's a whole nother animal and one I'm never touching. Far more expensive, far more travel required, far more draining on the kids. I've had a few players on my rec team move on to classic/select soccer and come back to me. Uniforms alone can run you $300-$400. It's absurd. Total racket, IMO.

Basketball is generally pretty easy too. Most of my son's games are 11am on Saturdays. Perfect.

Baseball? Oh boy...unless you or your child LOVES baseball, I would strongly advise against this. Little League coaches and boards are SERIOUS business when it comes to grade school baseball. Practices several times a week, games that go on forever and if you live in a climate like I do, night games in the spring can be brutal with rain and cold. One of my happiest days was when Cooper asked if he could quit baseball in 5th grade. Glad we did it, glad I helped coach, but it can be a grind.

 

[Sammy3469]

Do all youth sports start at obscene times on weekends? Asking for a friend without kids (yet).

Just depends, really. Personally speaking, I prefer having my games at 9am on Saturday morning so I can get them out of the way and enjoy a full day of college football. If I can get them all scheduled before noon, I'm a happy camper. I hate sitting around waiting for them.

Also, if you are thinking about coaching, consider joining the board of your local rec league, especially if the board has its monthly meetings at a pub. On top of the free beers, you tend to get preferential treatment with regards to your roster of players, practice location and times and game schedule.

you forgot the part about being able to yell at referees.

 

[Aerial Assault]

Do all youth sports start at obscene times on weekends? Asking for a friend without kids (yet).

Just depends, really. Personally speaking, I prefer having my games at 9am on Saturday morning so I can get them out of the way and enjoy a full day of college football. If I can get them all scheduled before noon, I'm a happy camper. I hate sitting around waiting for them.

Also, if you are thinking about coaching, consider joining the board of your local rec league, especially if the board has its monthly meetings at a pub. On top of the free beers, you tend to get preferential treatment with regards to your roster of players, practice location and times and game schedule.

as to the coaching recommendation. I can't see myself ever doing that, but if so I will bear that in mind.

So, do any of these leagues start at, say, noon on Saturday? I can always DVR any sports, and am not a college football fan either (in fact, I'm surprisingly losing interest in college basketball).

What age are we talking about? What sport? What level?

From my experience, rec soccer is the easiest from a time commitment/scheduling standpoint. You have 1-2 practices a week that last 60-90 minutes and a game on Saturday. I'd say 90% of these games are played before 1pm on Saturday. I like morning games for the reasons cited above and have some influence as to my game schedule. If you are a parent and not a coach, well...you're at the mercy of the league scheduler.

Sundays are for competitive soccer. That's a whole nother animal and one I'm never touching. Far more expensive, far more travel required, far more draining on the kids. I've had a few players on my rec team move on to classic/select soccer and come back to me. Uniforms alone can run you $300-$400. It's absurd. Total racket, IMO.

Basketball is generally pretty easy too. Most of my son's games are 11am on Saturdays. Perfect.

Baseball? Oh boy...unless you or your child LOVES baseball, I would strongly advise against this. Little League coaches and boards are SERIOUS business when it comes to grade school baseball. Practices several times a week, games that go on forever and if you live in a climate like I do, night games in the spring can be brutal with rain and cold. One of my happiest days was when Cooper asked if he could quit baseball in 5th grade. Glad we did it, glad I helped coach, but it can be a grind.

You summed it up well; thanks. Since I was awful at baseball but decent at soccer and the SO has some soccer skills I assume we'll be facing the soccer side of things. I toyed with football too but don't know that I would let a son play it.

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

Do all youth sports start at obscene times on weekends? Asking for a friend without kids (yet).

Just depends, really. Personally speaking, I prefer having my games at 9am on Saturday morning so I can get them out of the way and enjoy a full day of college football. If I can get them all scheduled before noon, I'm a happy camper. I hate sitting around waiting for them.

Also, if you are thinking about coaching, consider joining the board of your local rec league, especially if the board has its monthly meetings at a pub. On top of the free beers, you tend to get preferential treatment with regards to your roster of players, practice location and times and game schedule.

you forgot the part about being able to yell at fight referees.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

I started coaching my kids' AYSO teams so I could be the one in charge of where and when we had practices. True story.

 

[St. Louis Bob]

Sorry to hear about Uncle Don, LD. :(

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

Cool as F

 

[Limp Ditka]

Sorry to hear about Uncle Don, LD. :(

Thanks to all. We weren't all that close since he lived in Cali, but him and his wife were both from Chicago, so they'd get here annually up until the late 80's when his parents passed. So lots of good childhood memories of the guy.

 

[tommyboy]

Coaching 4 yr old soccer is basically herding kittens.

I'd consider you a genius coach if by the mid season your kids understand not to swarm the ball like fire ants on a beetle.

 

[Dan Lambskin]

I don't think it's fair that no one tells you in advance how much of a pain in the ### kids are. And they definitely don't tell you how the curve of going from 1 to 2 is exponentially worse than just having 1. I'm pretty much at that point where when I am home, one of the other humans in the house needs me to do something for them or is complaining that I'm not doing something for them. I can't even imagine what 3 kids is like.

4 seems like it would be way past the point of sanity.

Can you imagine people with 5 kids? Seriously?

That just means you are living with a woman.

GM, I will swap places with you for the next 15 years. I will gladly take 4 boys and 1 girl over 3 girls. Yesterday the 5 year old threw a fit every time we said no. She made a sandwich using the last piece of cheese, wanted to make a second one and i told her she couldn't since she just ate the last piece of cheese. Flopped on the floor and starting kicking and throwing stuff. Awesome!!! I know it is a phase, and she will grow out of it just in time for her younger sister to reach that phase.

Oh, and my wife managed to break the engraved wine glass she just got for Christmas. Apparently I have been doing the dishes wrong all these years. Instead of placing the dirty dishes in the empty dishwasher you are supposed to just toss them all in the sink. And the appropriate way to fill the sink in the following order: Wine glass and drinking glasses laying down in sink, cover them with a plastic placemat, place several dinner plates on top, add a few kids bowls, then put the large popcorn bowl on top so there is no way to use the sink anymore (but hey, there is nothing on the counter now), wait 10 seconds and then hear the sounds of glass breaking when something shifts.

Throw in some cucumber (Apple, potato) peels and some plates of half eaten food and the paper towel you used to wipe the kids faces and it'll look like my sink. Run some water or milk over it for good measureIf only there was a person who stayed home with the kids all day that could empty the dishwasher and load the dirty dishes as they get used throughout the day

Exhibit A