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GM's Thread About Everything/GM's Thread About Nothing (34 Viewers)

I appreciate all the kind words and thoughts from everybody, but I am so ####### tired of feeling like a damn sad sack.

My wife and I made some mistakes in our due diligence on this project, without question. We own that. We just need to get the ship righted and get into the damn house, which we still love.

My mom died. That sucks, but everybody dies. It hurts now and will continue to hurt going forward, but hopefully it will be a bit less of an open wound over time.

My kids are ####ed up. Mainly because I made the mistake of marrying and procreating with a crazy person. I don't know how to fix that, but I have been dealing with it for years.

I lost my job for the second time in the last six years. The first time was 100% performance-related, so that's on me. I was in a tough industry and reaped the rewards, but I also knew the risks. The loss of my latest job was due to the business falling apart. Sure, I helped build it, but I only owned 10%. And I was the junior partner to somebody I am glad to be free of, so that is actually a blessing. I am currently doing consulting work for an old bosses' business which is better than nothing. And I'll find another job.

Enough pity party bull####.

 
kevzilla said:
RL has shown more restraint than I possess. My little craphole in The Favelas on Cahill Drive looks better all the time.
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I am more and more averse to interpersonal conflict as I have gotten older. I used to be a real richard on these forums and sometimes was in real life as well. I don't like that side of me.

I always try to be reasonable and understanding when I deal with people. I think that is a good thing, but it also has its downside. I am finding that I am too often a sucker for the person who plays the victim card and acts like I am being a bully, even when I am being reasonable. This is the MO of my ex-wife and my kids. And apparently our contractor too. 

ETA: And that ******* contractor didn't even have the decency to bag an elk on his week long hunting trip. He promised that if he did he would give us a bunch of elk meat.

 
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El Floppo said:
such a different world. I can't take a step forward with construction if I don't have all the permits and building/county approvals in place. 

I guess I understand what these guys were offering- it's great to not have to be at the mercy of the local DOB timetables, although there are inherent risks in getting red-flagged and/or held up/fined. tbh- I don't think they did this as a scam... I do believe they were all doing you and the project a favor by risking moving forward without the permits.

That said, I don't understand the architects walking away because the project moved forward per their recommendations. And it should be in their contract to have ongoing regular site-visits to oversee construction and ensure the work is being done to per their drawings and intent to their satisfaction. and not being performed by well-meaning but inexperienced guys who have no business going near finish work. unless I had a client who had completely stopped fulfilling the contract (not payed), this last phase is where I spend a lot of time on site punch-listing and making sure everything that's been built right LOOKS right too. eta: I can't imagine just walking away from this crucial part of the project. like walking outside without a scarf.

dammit. this all makes me pissed... can't imagine what you're feeling- especially with everything else going on. so sorry. maybe ask the 12yo to pinch a nicer bottle of whiskey next time, to be instantly confiscated.
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This is worth less than nothing since I'm neither an architect, contractor, or home owner, but I do know a financial scam when I see one and this screams scam to me.  Produce the plan, get the guy into a permit pickle, walk away claiming the client messed up and then have the contractor slow roll him with shoddy work.  

From the outside with no background in this stuff, the entire thing seems more than a little fishy.

 
Sammy3469 said:
This is worth less than nothing since I'm neither an architect, contractor, or home owner, but I do know a financial scam when I see one and this screams scam to me.  Produce the plan, get the guy into a permit pickle, walk away claiming the client messed up and then have the contractor slow roll him with shoddy work.  

From the outside with no background in this stuff, the entire thing seems more than a little fishy.
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It's definitely possible.

The way the guy is balking at providing invoices and hours worked summaries I am starting to get a bit more suspicious.

 
Sammy3469 said:
This is worth less than nothing since I'm neither an architect, contractor, or home owner, but I do know a financial scam when I see one and this screams scam to me.  Produce the plan, get the guy into a permit pickle, walk away claiming the client messed up and then have the contractor slow roll him with shoddy work.  

From the outside with no background in this stuff, the entire thing seems more than a little fishy.
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and then what? not work again? move?

architects and contractors are in a service industry... we do a bad job, or heaven forbid try to scam somebody- we're not going to get much more work.

 
El Floppo said:
and then what? not work again? move?

architects and contractors are in a service industry... we do a bad job, or heaven forbid try to scam somebody- we're not going to get much more work.
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Yeah. Unless you scare the beejuses out of the mark about the fact work was improperly permitted (or in our case, not at all).

I lean to the interpretation that this guy is just not a very good businessman and that he isn't very accountable. I have seen other work the architect has done. It's spectacular. And the contractor has apparently done some really nice stuff too. I think he just got upside down in this project and he can't admit it is his fault.

An actual quote from him on an earlier problem: "Of course that is my responsibility, but it is not my fault!"

 
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El Floppo said:
and then what? not work again? move?

architects and contractors are in a service industry... we do a bad job, or heaven forbid try to scam somebody- we're not going to get much more work.
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I'm sure the architect has an e-mail trail saying don't do XYZ while talking out the other side of his mouth in person (or at least that's what I would do if this was a real scam).  Plus as RL is showing, what's the homeowner really going to do once they've messed up the permit process and done unpermitted work?  

 
Sammy3469 said:
I'm sure the architect has an e-mail trail saying don't do XYZ while talking out the other side of his mouth in person (or at least that's what I would do if this was a real scam).  Plus as RL is showing, what's the homeowner really going to do once they've messed up the permit process and done unpermitted work?  
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I get how it would work but I still am not seeing the long term benefit to the architect or contractor. Bilk a few grand and lose the reference? 

 
El Floppo said:
yeah- saw that in my news feed too. 

what could go wrong allowing strangers complete access to your empty abode?
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The dumber part is paying $250 for it.  Something gets stolen I just claim I didn't get it and request a new one 

Also can't wait for the first Amazon Driver Mauled By Dog story 

 
"when I'm ready to forget it, I'll tell you I'm ready to forget it. I'm tired of people asking me that"

- 6:30pm, 1st Ave and 2nd st. Shouted into her cell phone.

ETA. "Forget it" = "forget it" weird autocorrect

Eta2-... Wtf ... Forget it = "suck penis" where penis rhymes with wick.

 
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El Floppo said:
"when I'm ready to forget it, I'll tell you I'm ready to forget it. I'm tired of people asking me that"

- 6:30pm, 1st Ave and 2nd st. Shouted into her cell phone.

ETA. "Forget it" = "forget it" weird autocorrect

Eta2-... Wtf ... Forget it = "suck penis" where penis rhymes with wick.
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Instead of asking for pics, I think it's appropriate to ask if we should even want to see pics?

 
El Floppo said:
"when I'm ready to forget it, I'll tell you I'm ready to forget it. I'm tired of people asking me that"

- 6:30pm, 1st Ave and 2nd st. Shouted into her cell phone.

ETA. "Forget it" = "forget it" weird autocorrect

Eta2-... Wtf ... Forget it = "suck penis" where penis rhymes with wick.
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forget it

 
McGarnicle said:
I'm in this really horrific controversy with my wife over halloween costumes. I absolutely hate this holiday. 
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Wife and I argued for 5 minutes about the cardinal direction from a busstop to a middle school she looked at today. She was describing walking towards the East River, which from our apartment is due east... plus is also called the "East" river- so naturally is always east. Even when due south of the bus stop in question. 

And she couldn't let it go, which is usually my m.o.. i tried to even agree, but kept giggling. So she felt compelled to show me a map- which of course illustrated my point. But not to her... See!? There's the East River right there! (Due south and continued giggling on my part).

MARRIAGE!

 
krista4 said:
:popcorn:   We're here to help, or at least to make fun of you and/or your wife.
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I bought a Gumby costume that didn't fit. My wife didn't like Gumby anyway, so whatthe####ever. The theme is vaudeville but the invites specifically say only the entertainment is Vaudeville and all themes are welcome and pics from past years show everything from ####### Love Boat to M & M's to Sonny & Cher and everything in between. So I take that as license to dress however I like. 

 
McGarnicle said:
I bought a Gumby costume that didn't fit. My wife didn't like Gumby anyway, so whatthe####ever. The theme is vaudeville but the invites specifically say only the entertainment is Vaudeville and all themes are welcome and pics from past years show everything from ####### Love Boat to M & M's to Sonny & Cher and everything in between. So I take that as license to dress however I like. 
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the Aristocrats

 
McGarnicle said:
I bought a Gumby costume that didn't fit. My wife didn't like Gumby anyway, so whatthe####ever. The theme is vaudeville but the invites specifically say only the entertainment is Vaudeville and all themes are welcome and pics from past years show everything from ####### Love Boat to M & M's to Sonny & Cher and everything in between. So I take that as license to dress however I like. 
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Get this costume http://www.theyankshop.com.au/assets/full/TYS000014.jpg

Also wanted to do  this couples costume  back in the day but my wife hates fun 

 
McGarnicle said:
I bought a Gumby costume that didn't fit. My wife didn't like Gumby anyway, so whatthe####ever. The theme is vaudeville but the invites specifically say only the entertainment is Vaudeville and all themes are welcome and pics from past years show everything from ####### Love Boat to M & M's to Sonny & Cher and everything in between. So I take that as license to dress however I like. 
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Was it a sexy Gumby, or just plain Gumby?

 
krista4 said:
McGarnicle said:
I bought a Gumby costume that didn't fit. My wife didn't like Gumby anyway, so whatthe####ever. The theme is vaudeville but the invites specifically say only the entertainment is Vaudeville and all themes are welcome and pics from past years show everything from ####### Love Boat to M & M's to Sonny & Cher and everything in between. So I take that as license to dress however I like. 
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Was it a sexy Gumby, or just plain Gumby?
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You were going for the Eddie Murphy Gumby right?  Angry, jewish Vaudeville comic ...passed over by talent and time?  ####in' perfect.  

 
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