Drifter
Footballguy
For today's uplifting news:
I mentioned in here a while back that they had found a small occurrence of breast cancer in my Mom. So small, they said, that it could not have been detected if it was any smaller. The treated it and cut it out and did the follow up and - boom, no cancer and none spread to her lymph nodes.
She comes out here last week for a friend of the family's wedding next week and is complaining of back pain and a low fever. This is unusual because my Mom does not complain, ever, under any circumstances. After a couple days she goes to a walk in clinic and the doctor looks her over and says she looks great, can't find anything wrong with her, she appears to be in awesome health. He says if it keeps up check into an ER where they could do a more extensive look-see.
It does and she does and yesterday they find a large mass in her chest on her lung and a building anyeurism between her aorta and her lung that could burst any time, killing her fairly rapidly. They don't know if the mass is an infection or cancer or something else but the diagnosis is pretty grim. The story last night was regardless of what this was, it was inoperable and was going to kill her now or sometime very soon. My Dad is a mess because although he's brilliant and stoic, she runs the show. He likely hasn't cooked a meal for himself since he was single and their 50th anniversary was just earlier this month. I keep it together when I'm with her and him because I know me breaking down will break both of them and both are being very brave all things considered. However, the second I got in my car to go home, I lost it. Cried like I haven't cried in probably over 30 years. Not just for me and losing my mom but for my kids, especially my daughter who would never get to know her and what an amazing person she is/was and what a great role model for a young woman she would be and mostly for my Dad who has obviously never considered that she might go first. I tried talking to him last night about what he would do next and he just couldn't comprehend it, he mumbled that she had been his whole life for 50 years and went into his room and shut the door.
Because she is Canadian (actually Australian but living in Canada), they want to keep her overnight and then put her on a plan at the earliest opportunity to get back to Toronto where they say the hospitals are actually better at this type of thing, not to mention free. However, this morning she begins coughing up blood. At that point, I'm pretty sure that's it. The thing is about to burst and within minutes it would be over. Nurses come, doctors come, surgeons consult. Luckily she stops coughing up the blood so it appeared to be a temporary passing of blood between the walls of the aneurism and her lung. Still could go any second but not necessarily the 2 minute warning.
The surgeons decide that they are going to get her into surgery and try and put a stint in place. The vascular surgeon is new to the situation and seems to be confident that he can do it without causing too much disruption that the things bursts. This is contrary to what the thoracic surgeon had said but this guy thinks that issue would be a very low chance. He also thinks that because the breast cancer had never spread to her lymph nodes that there's a decent chance that the tumor is not malignant. The thoracic guy is going to power wash her lungs and test what comes out. If she survives the surgery and if the stint works and if their is no infection and if it's not cancerous and if they can get her back to Toronto and find her another aorta, she may survive. Hell of a lot of ifs but when it's your Mom you're happy for any ray of hope.
Been a long ####ty 24 hours and probably not going to get any better. I can't feel sorry for myself because sooner or later this happens to everybody and for many far sooner than this. Don't forget to tell your mom how much you love her and as hard as it is encourage your parents if they are both living to have a plan for what to do when one of them goes before the other. If they are like mine, they only planned for what to do when both were gone and didn't give the more likely possibility much thought.
They just came and finally told us that she's in prep and about to start the surgery. Wish me more luck than we've had so far.
She comes out here last week for a friend of the family's wedding next week and is complaining of back pain and a low fever. This is unusual because my Mom does not complain, ever, under any circumstances. After a couple days she goes to a walk in clinic and the doctor looks her over and says she looks great, can't find anything wrong with her, she appears to be in awesome health. He says if it keeps up check into an ER where they could do a more extensive look-see.
It does and she does and yesterday they find a large mass in her chest on her lung and a building anyeurism between her aorta and her lung that could burst any time, killing her fairly rapidly. They don't know if the mass is an infection or cancer or something else but the diagnosis is pretty grim. The story last night was regardless of what this was, it was inoperable and was going to kill her now or sometime very soon. My Dad is a mess because although he's brilliant and stoic, she runs the show. He likely hasn't cooked a meal for himself since he was single and their 50th anniversary was just earlier this month. I keep it together when I'm with her and him because I know me breaking down will break both of them and both are being very brave all things considered. However, the second I got in my car to go home, I lost it. Cried like I haven't cried in probably over 30 years. Not just for me and losing my mom but for my kids, especially my daughter who would never get to know her and what an amazing person she is/was and what a great role model for a young woman she would be and mostly for my Dad who has obviously never considered that she might go first. I tried talking to him last night about what he would do next and he just couldn't comprehend it, he mumbled that she had been his whole life for 50 years and went into his room and shut the door.
Because she is Canadian (actually Australian but living in Canada), they want to keep her overnight and then put her on a plan at the earliest opportunity to get back to Toronto where they say the hospitals are actually better at this type of thing, not to mention free. However, this morning she begins coughing up blood. At that point, I'm pretty sure that's it. The thing is about to burst and within minutes it would be over. Nurses come, doctors come, surgeons consult. Luckily she stops coughing up the blood so it appeared to be a temporary passing of blood between the walls of the aneurism and her lung. Still could go any second but not necessarily the 2 minute warning.
The surgeons decide that they are going to get her into surgery and try and put a stint in place. The vascular surgeon is new to the situation and seems to be confident that he can do it without causing too much disruption that the things bursts. This is contrary to what the thoracic surgeon had said but this guy thinks that issue would be a very low chance. He also thinks that because the breast cancer had never spread to her lymph nodes that there's a decent chance that the tumor is not malignant. The thoracic guy is going to power wash her lungs and test what comes out. If she survives the surgery and if the stint works and if their is no infection and if it's not cancerous and if they can get her back to Toronto and find her another aorta, she may survive. Hell of a lot of ifs but when it's your Mom you're happy for any ray of hope.
Been a long ####ty 24 hours and probably not going to get any better. I can't feel sorry for myself because sooner or later this happens to everybody and for many far sooner than this. Don't forget to tell your mom how much you love her and as hard as it is encourage your parents if they are both living to have a plan for what to do when one of them goes before the other. If they are like mine, they only planned for what to do when both were gone and didn't give the more likely possibility much thought.
They just came and finally told us that she's in prep and about to start the surgery. Wish me more luck than we've had so far.
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Rough stuff; very sorry to hear.
