GM's thread about nothing (18 Viewers)

[General Malaise]

Note to self: stop washing jeans.

 

[cosjobs]

Getting low on grapefruit juice, so I am having to mix three parts bourbon to one part gfj.

I need smaller glassware.

/drunk

I'm taking a generic drug for cholesterol (have taken lipitor in the past) and they all come with labels saying you can't eat grapefruits or drink the juice. Why is that? What happens?

Grapefruit products are believed to interfere with an enzyme your body uses to break down Lipitor. This means that the drug stays in your body longer when it interacts with grapefruit. In fact, clinical studies have shown that grapefruit can significantly increase the levels of Lipitor in a person's blood.

In one study, drug levels increased by 83 percent in those who drank grapefruit juice three times a day compared to the people who only drank water.

I'm trying out this fancy new search engine called "google." Try it out here

 

[General Malaise]

I just bet 50 big ones on some guy named Massa to win the Monaco Grand Prix tonight. I know nothing about him, except he drives a Ferrari and I hear they are fast.Same wager on some chick named Danica to win the indy 500 tomorrow. I figure its time to hand one of these big races to the wimmens.

50k on a guy starting from 6th spot on the grid at Monaco???? Not to mention he's also the 2nd driver for Ferrari with Alonso at slot 4??I'd look towards the 9th spot, Lewis Hamilton, if you think someone from way behind can overtake Vettel. He had a good Q1 and Q2, and is also crazy enough to force himself past on the narrow streets.Personally I wouldn't even attempt it. Monaco is notoriously difficult to pass at, due to the very narrow corners, and it favors drivers that get ahead early, especially when the weather is good (0% chance for rain tomorrow during the race).Good luck though. I'd like to see a Ferrari on top of the podium, so I'll cheer for you.

I love that you know about this stuff to the degree you do. Always impresses me...when I needed a soccer lean for the Timbers game, I knew you'd have it out of any of my friends. Yet if I asked you an NFL line, you'd shrug and say 'what'.

 

[General Malaise]

Getting low on grapefruit juice, so I am having to mix three parts bourbon to one part gfj.

I need smaller glassware.

/drunk

I'm taking a generic drug for cholesterol (have taken lipitor in the past) and they all come with labels saying you can't eat grapefruits or drink the juice. Why is that? What happens?

Grapefruit products are believed to interfere with an enzyme your body uses to break down Lipitor. This means that the drug stays in your body longer when it interacts with grapefruit. In fact, clinical studies have shown that grapefruit can significantly increase the levels of Lipitor in a person's blood.

In one study, drug levels increased by 83 percent in those who drank grapefruit juice three times a day compared to the people who only drank water.

I'm trying out this fancy new search engine called "google." Try it our here

I'm putting you on ignore.

 

[cosjobs]

Getting low on grapefruit juice, so I am having to mix three parts bourbon to one part gfj.

I need smaller glassware.

/drunk

I'm taking a generic drug for cholesterol (have taken lipitor in the past) and they all come with labels saying you can't eat grapefruits or drink the juice. Why is that? What happens?

Grapefruit products are believed to interfere with an enzyme your body uses to break down Lipitor. This means that the drug stays in your body longer when it interacts with grapefruit. In fact, clinical studies have shown that grapefruit can significantly increase the levels of Lipitor in a person's blood.

In one study, drug levels increased by 83 percent in those who drank grapefruit juice three times a day compared to the people who only drank water.

I'm trying out this fancy new search engine called "google." Try it our here

I'm putting you on ignore.

wish you had done that $600 ago

 

[Sconch]

Getting low on grapefruit juice, so I am having to mix three parts bourbon to one part gfj. I need smaller glassware. /drunk

I'm taking a generic drug for cholesterol (have taken lipitor in the past) and they all come with labels saying you can't eat grapefruits or drink the juice. Why is that? What happens?

Every time you take a sip a small child is slapped in the face.

 

[bostonfred]

Getting low on grapefruit juice, so I am having to mix three parts bourbon to one part gfj. I need smaller glassware. /drunk

I'm taking a generic drug for cholesterol (have taken lipitor in the past) and they all come with labels saying you can't eat grapefruits or drink the juice. Why is that? What happens?

Every time you take a sip a small child is slapped in the face.

Can I pick the child?

 

[charvik]

I just bet 50 big ones on some guy named Massa to win the Monaco Grand Prix tonight. I know nothing about him, except he drives a Ferrari and I hear they are fast.Same wager on some chick named Danica to win the indy 500 tomorrow. I figure its time to hand one of these big races to the wimmens.

50k on a guy starting from 6th spot on the grid at Monaco???? Not to mention he's also the 2nd driver for Ferrari with Alonso at slot 4??I'd look towards the 9th spot, Lewis Hamilton, if you think someone from way behind can overtake Vettel. He had a good Q1 and Q2, and is also crazy enough to force himself past on the narrow streets.Personally I wouldn't even attempt it. Monaco is notoriously difficult to pass at, due to the very narrow corners, and it favors drivers that get ahead early, especially when the weather is good (0% chance for rain tomorrow during the race).Good luck though. I'd like to see a Ferrari on top of the podium, so I'll cheer for you.

I love that you know about this stuff to the degree you do. Always impresses me...when I needed a soccer lean for the Timbers game, I knew you'd have it out of any of my friends. Yet if I asked you an NFL line, you'd shrug and say 'what'.

I'm just shocked I got to read about Formula 1 in here, and a 50k bet on it nonetheless.

 

[General Malaise]

Getting low on grapefruit juice, so I am having to mix three parts bourbon to one part gfj. I need smaller glassware. /drunk

I'm taking a generic drug for cholesterol (have taken lipitor in the past) and they all come with labels saying you can't eat grapefruits or drink the juice. Why is that? What happens?

Every time you take a sip a small child is slapped in the face.

Any chance we can get a recap of your trip to Disney Land? Let your anger flow...

 

[Lieutenant Dan]

Getting low on grapefruit juice, so I am having to mix three parts bourbon to one part gfj. I need smaller glassware. /drunk

I'm taking a generic drug for cholesterol (have taken lipitor in the past) and they all come with labels saying you can't eat grapefruits or drink the juice. Why is that? What happens?

Every time you take a sip a small child is slapped in the face.

Can I pick the child?

only if you pick one of Tanner's kids

 

[Mr. Pickles]

I just bet 50 big ones

50 euros?

 

[cosjobs]

I just bet 50 big ones

50 euros?

there may be some miscommunication. That would explain the piles of cash on my front porch last March and my dead dogs and repossessed house in May.

 

[Thorn]

Speaking of boners.....I thought I was going to stay in tonight and drink heavily while watching infomercials and season 2 of "Life On Top" on Cinemax. However, got a text from a girl that moved to California but is in town for the weekend. We've always had a flirty relationship but other than making out for 10 seconds at an 8th grade party, we've never done anything. Me thinks tonight could be interesting, here's our texts so far:Her: Hey you... Are you parenting this weekend or we can get a drinky?Me: I'm not parenting this weekend so we can do whatever you want.Her: Whatever I want....hhhmmmmm...... could be a fun night, lol

you're kidding right? christ. answer here was "perfect. i'll be at place at time, text me when you're out front. lololololololololololol!"

 

[Thorn]

Still waiting for anyone good to text.

 

[Good Posting Judge]

I'm betting 300 big ones on the Tigers/Red Sox game today.

 

[Sconch]

I'm betting 300 big ones on the Tigers/Red Sox game today.

How are you not banned?

 

[krista4]

Quality posting last night.

 

[St. Louis Bob]

Just got home from Buster's funeral...it started at 10am.

Once again, GB the Irish.

I swear to jebus, whenever I die all I want is for people to still be doing shots in my honor 6 hours after the funeral. That's it. I can't think of a better memorial.

Shots served by the JV cheerleading squad?

The afterparty was at a bar I worked at a couple years ago, so I knew most of the staff. I'll be back there toward the end of the night to do horrible things to a spectacular 23-year old that I hooked up with last month. And the hookup left a lot to be desired, so I really need to finish this job. Seriously, she's one of the most spectacular chicks in the world...that really could pass for a JV cheerleader.I have a feeling that Buster would be happy if I bagged this broad.

I have something like this in my will. No shtick. When my Uncle Jackie died a few years ago we were still drinking after the funeral home closed.

No kids tonight so we're headed to LoRusso's for dinner. A little more notice and we would have made the trip to Memphis. I'll probably get laid tonight. If I can get a boner.

Update on your boner?

All I'm going to say is I had the smoked chicken ravioli in a white sauce topped with spinach, Portabella mushrooms and pistachio's.

Speaking of boners.....

I thought I was going to stay in tonight and drink heavily while watching infomercials and season 2 of "Life On Top" on Cinemax. However, got a text from a girl that moved to California but is in town for the weekend. We've always had a flirty relationship but other than making out for 10 seconds at an 8th grade party, we've never done anything. Me thinks tonight could be interesting, here's our texts so far:

Her: Hey you... Are you parenting this weekend or we can get a drinky?

Me: I'm not parenting this weekend so we can do whatever you want.

Her: Whatever I want....hhhmmmmm...... could be a fun night, lol

Me: Yep.. drinks, romantic music, midget porn, deep conversation etc.

Her: LMAO.. all my favs.. I'm gonna shower then I'll come pick you up.

This is a developing situation...................

I'll be so disappointed if you don't #### on her #########BTW, that last set of #'s is meant to be ambiguous.

I'm gonna scream your name when I do it.

 

[General Malaise]

Amos Lee: Worth my time or uber pony tail feely?

 

[St. Louis Bob]

Amos Lee: Worth my time or uber pony tail feely?

Clueless to what this means.Oh yeah, went to my GB's that is engaged to be married to the broad with kids. Pretty sure he ####ed that all up last night. We've been friends since we were 8, you think the dumb **** would listen to me. We were pretty loaded and kept telling him to leave so I could have a 3-way and she said something like "I would love to, we haven't had sex in a month". This is wrong for any guy but this would be like Disco Stu not having sex with his girl for a month. My GB should never have gotten engaged. Dumb #######.The evibe also arrived in the just in time on Saturday. GPJ, I know what you mean, I think she is in love. However,it took some work to use it as instructed. Yeah, that's right.I think I might start drinking again. HJS you may get some texts.

 

[krista4]

Amos Lee: Worth my time or uber pony tail feely?

I like him.

 

[DA RAIDERS]

No response from homer yet........

 

[Samuel L Bronkowitz]

Our Memorial Weekend BBQ/drunkfest is set to start in an hour. Only problem, is that the storms will be here in a half hour.

20-30 people will be inside now. FML

 

[Good Posting Judge]

I'm betting 300 big ones on the Tigers/Red Sox game today.

How are you not banned?

I don't think betting a large amount of money on a sporting event is grounds for a banning, sir.

 

[Sconch]

Amos Lee: Worth my time or uber pony tail feely?

The evibe also arrived in the just in time on Saturday. GPJ, I know what you mean, I think she is in love. However,it took some work to use it as instructed. Yeah, that's right.

Pics? (photo or handdrawn will do)

 

[DA RAIDERS]

Amos Lee: Worth my time or uber pony tail feely?

The evibe also arrived in the just in time on Saturday. GPJ, I know what you mean, I think she is in love. However,it took some work to use it as instructed. Yeah, that's right.

Pics? (photo or handdrawn will do)

Wtf does it feel like on the top of your Johnson? And did you wedge the twins in there too?

 

[DA RAIDERS]

No response from homer yet........

 

[cosjobs]

Drunk texting transcript with Homer J last night:

FYI, I called you 7 years ago and you were very dickish to me. Yours in christ, cos

>> No way, how was I dickish? I liked you from the minute I talked to you. . I was just afraid of the poker thing because I wasn't very good.

So many wasted years over a misinterpreted voice inflection... we have a lot of making out up to do.

>> Lol. I can still pick your voice out of a lineup... I love me some cosjobs!!!

Its always been extremely mutual GB

And just so you know. You didn't have to be any good at poker. I WAS GIVING AWAY MONEY11kk!!

>> !!!JUAN111!!!

 

[-fish-]

Drunk texting transcript with Homer J last night:

FYI, I called you 7 years ago and you were very dickish to me. Yours in christ, cos

>> No way, how was I dickish? I liked you from the minute I talked to you. . I was just afraid of the poker thing because I wasn't very good.

So many wasted years over a misinterpreted voice inflection... we have a lot of making out up to do.

>> Lol. I can still pick your voice out of a lineup... I love me some cosjobs!!!

Its always been extremely mutual GB

And just so you know. You didn't have to be any good at poker. I WAS GIVING AWAY MONEY11kk!!

>> !!!JUAN111!!!

one of the gayest things I've ever read.

 

[madhatter]

Drunk texting transcript with Homer J last night:

FYI, I called you 7 years ago and you were very dickish to me. Yours in christ, cos

>> No way, how was I dickish? I liked you from the minute I talked to you. . I was just afraid of the poker thing because I wasn't very good.

So many wasted years over a misinterpreted voice inflection... we have a lot of making out up to do.

>> Lol. I can still pick your voice out of a lineup... I love me some cosjobs!!!

Its always been extremely mutual GB

And just so you know. You didn't have to be any good at poker. I WAS GIVING AWAY MONEY11kk!!

>> !!!JUAN111!!!

one of the gayest things I've ever read.

one of?

 

[YSR]

Really, really wanted to text HJS last night, but I couldn't get any of my cats to pose for nipple pics.

Next time, GB. Next time.

 

[Thorn]

Obviously some of you need to PM me your numbers so I can send more drunk texts.

 

[Homer J Simpson]

Drunk texting transcript with Homer J last night:

FYI, I called you 7 years ago and you were very dickish to me. Yours in christ, cos

>> No way, how was I dickish? I liked you from the minute I talked to you. . I was just afraid of the poker thing because I wasn't very good.

So many wasted years over a misinterpreted voice inflection... we have a lot of making out up to do.

>> Lol. I can still pick your voice out of a lineup... I love me some cosjobs!!!

Its always been extremely mutual GB

And just so you know. You didn't have to be any good at poker. I WAS GIVING AWAY MONEY11kk!!

>> !!!JUAN111!!!

one of the gayest things I've ever read.

You should see the exchanges between me and Tanner. You'd be able to use them.

 

[Homer J Simpson]

FYI there was mild hooking up last night but she wouldn't come back to my lair apartment because she had to be at work early today.

 

[Homer J Simpson]

Obviously some of you need to PM me your numbers so I can send more drunk texts.

:stillwaiting:

 

[Mr. Pickles]

FYI there was mild hooking up last night but she wouldn't come back to my lair apartment because she had to be at work early today.

[Costanza]Would I like to come up? I would love to come up. I, I'm fighting not to. Fighting! Unfortunately, I, uh, have to get an early start tomorrow. Gotta get up and hit that pavement.

[/Costanza]

 

[Homer J Simpson]

FYI there was mild hooking up last night but she wouldn't come back to my lair apartment because she had to be at work early today.

[Costanza]Would I like to come up? I would love to come up. I, I'm fighting not to. Fighting! Unfortunately, I, uh, have to get an early start tomorrow. Gotta get up and hit that pavement.

[/Costanza]

 

[Early_10]

I'm confused. If/when I date again, am I suppose to be looking for teenagers or 50 somethings? I think you've all ruined it either way.

 

[kevzilla]

I'm confused. If/when I date again, am I suppose to be looking for teenagers or 50 somethings? I think you've all ruined it either way.

You're looking for freshly-minted 50-somethings. HTH.:sevenweeks:

 

[Sconch]

Drunk texting transcript with Homer J last night:

FYI, I called you 7 years ago and you were very dickish to me. Yours in christ, cos

>> No way, how was I dickish? I liked you from the minute I talked to you. . I was just afraid of the poker thing because I wasn't very good.

So many wasted years over a misinterpreted voice inflection... we have a lot of making out up to do.

>> Lol. I can still pick your voice out of a lineup... I love me some cosjobs!!!

Its always been extremely mutual GB

And just so you know. You didn't have to be any good at poker. I WAS GIVING AWAY MONEY11kk!!

>> !!!JUAN111!!!

one of the gayest things I've ever read.

You should see the exchanges between me and Tanner. You'd be able to use them.

They're only gay if BOTH of us have our pants down while texting.

 

[cosjobs]

Drunk texting transcript with Homer J last night:

FYI, I called you 7 years ago and you were very dickish to me. Yours in christ, cos

>> No way, how was I dickish? I liked you from the minute I talked to you. . I was just afraid of the poker thing because I wasn't very good.

So many wasted years over a misinterpreted voice inflection... we have a lot of making out up to do.

>> Lol. I can still pick your voice out of a lineup... I love me some cosjobs!!!

Its always been extremely mutual GB

And just so you know. You didn't have to be any good at poker. I WAS GIVING AWAY MONEY11kk!!

>> !!!JUAN111!!!

one of the gayest things I've ever read.

You should see the exchanges between me and Tanner. You'd be able to use them.

They're only gay if BOTH of us have our pants down while texting.

eta: with one hand

 

[Homer J Simpson]

Drunk texting transcript with Homer J last night:

FYI, I called you 7 years ago and you were very dickish to me. Yours in christ, cos

>> No way, how was I dickish? I liked you from the minute I talked to you. . I was just afraid of the poker thing because I wasn't very good.

So many wasted years over a misinterpreted voice inflection... we have a lot of making out up to do.

>> Lol. I can still pick your voice out of a lineup... I love me some cosjobs!!!

Its always been extremely mutual GB

And just so you know. You didn't have to be any good at poker. I WAS GIVING AWAY MONEY11kk!!

>> !!!JUAN111!!!

one of the gayest things I've ever read.

You should see the exchanges between me and Tanner. You'd be able to use them.

They're only gay if BOTH of us have our pants down while texting.

eta: with one hand

Yeah they're pretty gay then

 

[Sconch]

Drunk texting transcript with Homer J last night:

FYI, I called you 7 years ago and you were very dickish to me. Yours in christ, cos

>> No way, how was I dickish? I liked you from the minute I talked to you. . I was just afraid of the poker thing because I wasn't very good.

So many wasted years over a misinterpreted voice inflection... we have a lot of making out up to do.

>> Lol. I can still pick your voice out of a lineup... I love me some cosjobs!!!

Its always been extremely mutual GB

And just so you know. You didn't have to be any good at poker. I WAS GIVING AWAY MONEY11kk!!

>> !!!JUAN111!!!

one of the gayest things I've ever read.

You should see the exchanges between me and Tanner. You'd be able to use them.

They're only gay if BOTH of us have our pants down while texting.

eta: with one hand

Yeah they're pretty gay then

Text on the way

 

[Sconch]

So I just got off the AIM with Zartan. He's agreed to pick me up at the airport when I go to Denver in July.

 

[YSR]

So I just got off the AIM with Zartan. He's agreed to pick me up at the airport when I go to Denver in July.

 

[Gadzooks]

FYI there was mild hooking up last night but she wouldn't come back to my lair apartment because she had to be at work early today.

It pains me to hear this. And why is she working early on a sunday? She a priest?

 

[Mr. Pickles]

So I just got off the AIM with Zartan. He's agreed to pick me up at the airport when I go to Denver in July.

Gayest thing I've read yet.

 

[Homer J Simpson]

FYI there was mild hooking up last night but she wouldn't come back to my lair apartment because she had to be at work early today.

It pains me to hear this. And why is she working early on a sunday? She a priest?

9 am staff meeting at the bar/restaurant where she works. Killed my business for tonight too because no one went out. The owner and his family are a ####.

 

[Sconch]

So I just got off the AIM with Zartan. He's agreed to pick me up at the airport when I go to Denver in July.

Gayest thing I've read yet.

I was trying to be subtle.

 

[Samuel L Bronkowitz]

5318008