GM's thread about nothing (24 Viewers)

[Early_10]

My 11 year old is currently serving a one-day out of school suspension for cold-cocking a kid that I have come to find out has been bullying my son for the past year and a half. Was angry at first when I found out about this on Friday, but the more I find out about it, the more I'm glad my boy got a couple of really good shots in on this ####### punk.

He and the other bully, taking their cue from "Diary of a Wimpy Kid" created a game called the "IBJr. Touch". If IBJr. touched you or you touched him, no one would talk to you until you passed it on. About 1/2 of the weak minded 5th graders played along (to their credit, IBJr's friends did not abandon him and refused to participate). The teachers claim to have had no knowledge of this going on.

My son blindsided this kid when he attempted to taunt him further in art class and slammed his head into the desk, cutting his lip.

Good for him.

I had a situation with Cal last week. Thursday he came home from school and he showed me he had a pocket full of rocks " in case anybody tried to beat him up". I pressed him about it and he quickly changed the subject. Then on Friday after school he was outside playing and he came home really pissed off, actually enraged which in my family looks like this , be cause three boys were pushing him around and throwing stuff at him. Oh yeah and they were all THREE YEARS OLDER than him. I told him to come inside but he hopped on his bike and took off towards the house they were at and said "no, I'm kicking their butts". He returned about 20 minutes later still . I got down on one knee, looked him in the eye and asked him if he was alright. He replied "I got them back.". Then he threw his arms around me and whispered in my ear "they really hurt me daddy" and started bawling. I'

:( Howd he get them back?

 

[Aaron Rudnicki]

Communion is an awesome movie. One of Christopher Walken's best roles.

The ICE...is gonna BREAK!

Every friggin time.

 

[General Malaise]

YSR, I'm sorry again to hear about your situation. You're a saint for agreeing to go near the hoarders for any length of time. :(I have not made my anti-Memphis list, but this might make it... I regularly go through the semi-hood to get from downtown (where I live) to midtown (where a lot of good restaurants are). Last night someone sitting at a stoplight on this route, about 2 miles from my house, was shot in the head in an attempted carjacking. I had been sitting at that light about 1/2 hour before the shooting. I'm down to fewer than 46 million seconds until I hope to leave!On another front, about a week ago I started drinking less and eating healthier in an attempt to lose weight. So far I've gained two pounds.

This reminds me of when I moved to Charleston.If you have never lived in the deep south, but have lived in really big cities (NYC, Chi, LA, etc.) the freaking charm wears off pronto.

From 1985 to 2009, I lived in Boston, New York, Los Angeles, and Chicago. Memphis seemed charming for a little while but has worn off very fast.

But it has a pyramid!

 

[YSR]

Took most of the morning, but I have just about all of the stuffed animals out of the condo.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

Took most of the morning, but I have just about all of the stuffed animals out of the condo.

Plushy or taxidermy?

 

[[icon]]

Knoxville Chronicles: Day 1, Entry 1:

If you're still there. Go eat at The Tomato Head in Market Square. Just trust me on this one. The #1 Pizza is flat out amazing and I usually can't stand vegetarian Pizza.

 

[YSR]

Took most of the morning, but I have just about all of the stuffed animals out of the condo.

Plushy or taxidermy?

Plushy. Mostly Halloween and University of Tennessee themed. Next up is the linen closet. I've already pulled out something like 30+ washcloths. I'm having to go little by little in order to keep my sanity.

 

[gmbacm]

My 11 year old is currently serving a one-day out of school suspension for cold-cocking a kid that I have come to find out has been bullying my son for the past year and a half. Was angry at first when I found out about this on Friday, but the more I find out about it, the more I'm glad my boy got a couple of really good shots in on this ####### punk.

He and the other bully, taking their cue from "Diary of a Wimpy Kid" created a game called the "IBJr. Touch". If IBJr. touched you or you touched him, no one would talk to you until you passed it on. About 1/2 of the weak minded 5th graders played along (to their credit, IBJr's friends did not abandon him and refused to participate). The teachers claim to have had no knowledge of this going on.

My son blindsided this kid when he attempted to taunt him further in art class and slammed his head into the desk, cutting his lip.

Good for him.

I had a situation with Cal last week. Thursday he came home from school and he showed me he had a pocket full of rocks " in case anybody tried to beat him up". I pressed him about it and he quickly changed the subject. Then on Friday after school he was outside playing and he came home really pissed off, actually enraged which in my family looks like this , be cause three boys were pushing him around and throwing stuff at him. Oh yeah and they were all THREE YEARS OLDER than him. I told him to come inside but he hopped on his bike and took off towards the house they were at and said "no, I'm kicking their butts". He returned about 20 minutes later still . I got down on one knee, looked him in the eye and asked him if he was alright. He replied "I got them back.". Then he threw his arms around me and whispered in my ear "they really hurt me daddy" and started bawling. I'

Glad he took care of it, hope he is doing OK? Makes me want to give my kid a big hug right now...

 

[Guster]

My 11 year old is currently serving a one-day out of school suspension for cold-cocking a kid that I have come to find out has been bullying my son for the past year and a half. Was angry at first when I found out about this on Friday, but the more I find out about it, the more I'm glad my boy got a couple of really good shots in on this ####### punk.

He and another bully, taking their cue from "Diary of a Wimpy Kid" created a game called the "IBJr. Touch". If IBJr. touched you or you touched him, no one would talk to you until you passed it on. About 1/2 of the weak minded 5th graders played along (to their credit, IBJr's friends did not abandon him and refused to participate). The teachers claim to have had no knowledge of this going on.

My son blindsided this kid when he attempted to taunt him further in art class and slammed his head into the desk, cutting his lip.

That's kinda awesome. Way to go IBJr!

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

Took most of the morning, but I have just about all of the stuffed animals out of the condo.

Plushy or taxidermy?

Plushy. Mostly Halloween and University of Tennessee themed. Next up is the linen closet. I've already pulled out something like 30+ washcloths. I'm having to go little by little in order to keep my sanity.

Smokey the Dog blow-up doll?

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

My 11 year old is currently serving a one-day out of school suspension for cold-cocking a kid that I have come to find out has been bullying my son for the past year and a half. Was angry at first when I found out about this on Friday, but the more I find out about it, the more I'm glad my boy got a couple of really good shots in on this ####### punk.

He and the other bully, taking their cue from "Diary of a Wimpy Kid" created a game called the "IBJr. Touch". If IBJr. touched you or you touched him, no one would talk to you until you passed it on. About 1/2 of the weak minded 5th graders played along (to their credit, IBJr's friends did not abandon him and refused to participate). The teachers claim to have had no knowledge of this going on.

My son blindsided this kid when he attempted to taunt him further in art class and slammed his head into the desk, cutting his lip.

Good for him.

I had a situation with Cal last week. Thursday he came home from school and he showed me he had a pocket full of rocks " in case anybody tried to beat him up". I pressed him about it and he quickly changed the subject. Then on Friday after school he was outside playing and he came home really pissed off, actually enraged which in my family looks like this , be cause three boys were pushing him around and throwing stuff at him. Oh yeah and they were all THREE YEARS OLDER than him. I told him to come inside but he hopped on his bike and took off towards the house they were at and said "no, I'm kicking their butts". He returned about 20 minutes later still . I got down on one knee, looked him in the eye and asked him if he was alright. He replied "I got them back.". Then he threw his arms around me and whispered in my ear "they really hurt me daddy" and started bawling. I'

Damn

 

[Pigskin P]

My 11 year old is currently serving a one-day out of school suspension for cold-cocking a kid that I have come to find out has been bullying my son for the past year and a half. Was angry at first when I found out about this on Friday, but the more I find out about it, the more I'm glad my boy got a couple of really good shots in on this ####### punk.

He and the other bully, taking their cue from "Diary of a Wimpy Kid" created a game called the "IBJr. Touch". If IBJr. touched you or you touched him, no one would talk to you until you passed it on. About 1/2 of the weak minded 5th graders played along (to their credit, IBJr's friends did not abandon him and refused to participate). The teachers claim to have had no knowledge of this going on.

My son blindsided this kid when he attempted to taunt him further in art class and slammed his head into the desk, cutting his lip.

Good for him.

A 10 year old Pigskin P, after a few months of relentless taunting, snapped in class one day and broke the school bully's nose (he happened to be Dan Fouts's nephew). I stll consider it one of my crowning achievements and my dad celebrated my 3 day suspension with a trip to the amusement park.

Cheers to IBJr.

 

[-fish-]

My 11 year old is currently serving a one-day out of school suspension for cold-cocking a kid that I have come to find out has been bullying my son for the past year and a half. Was angry at first when I found out about this on Friday, but the more I find out about it, the more I'm glad my boy got a couple of really good shots in on this ####### punk.

He and the other bully, taking their cue from "Diary of a Wimpy Kid" created a game called the "IBJr. Touch". If IBJr. touched you or you touched him, no one would talk to you until you passed it on. About 1/2 of the weak minded 5th graders played along (to their credit, IBJr's friends did not abandon him and refused to participate). The teachers claim to have had no knowledge of this going on.

My son blindsided this kid when he attempted to taunt him further in art class and slammed his head into the desk, cutting his lip.

Good for him.

I had a situation with Cal last week. Thursday he came home from school and he showed me he had a pocket full of rocks " in case anybody tried to beat him up". I pressed him about it and he quickly changed the subject. Then on Friday after school he was outside playing and he came home really pissed off, actually enraged which in my family looks like this , be cause three boys were pushing him around and throwing stuff at him. Oh yeah and they were all THREE YEARS OLDER than him. I told him to come inside but he hopped on his bike and took off towards the house they were at and said "no, I'm kicking their butts". He returned about 20 minutes later still . I got down on one knee, looked him in the eye and asked him if he was alright. He replied "I got them back.". Then he threw his arms around me and whispered in my ear "they really hurt me daddy" and started bawling. I'

that sucks, but good for him for standing up for himself.

 

[[icon]]

Hell, of all my friends I hardly even know anyone who's been a victim of a violent crime.

Just curious, how many is "hardly"?

One coworker who's about as street smart as as south dakota virgin was stumbling downtown toward his loft on the wrong street...so drunk he was barely able to stand (let alone walk) and he was jumped by 3 black dudes. didn't really rough him up that badly. Stole his wallet and told him to stay face down and count to 100. This was about 2 years ago. Two friends had their houses broken into in fairly bad areas (one about 10 years ago... one about 2 years ago). I think that about sums it up. I've driven through Orange Mound (and other shady areas) on several occasions. When I do standard "heads-up" rules apply. Keep an eye out for anyone around your car. Avoid fully stopping if you can... if you must, Keep enough room in front of your car that you can negotiate around the car in front of you to get out of there if needed... etc. But that #### is only in the really bad spots. Hell, I think I've only heard gunfire a couple times.

 

[Homer J Simpson]

Oh and for the record, I have never ever had phone sex with Homer. Homer, your number still the same?

 

[Guster]

Oh and I'm planning a house warming...err drinking party when I move in 2 weeks and realized I have no male friends to invite. All male friends that are just friends are as previously mentioned his friends. All new male friends...well I don't think having every guy I've dated in the one room is a good idea at this point.

 

[Joe T]

Not enough booze in the world, boys.

If you and I are ever in a pick-up basketball game together, I pray for humanity that we are not both on the "skins" team.

I'm always afraid a Hawk will swoop in and mistake me for a baby rat when I remove my shirt pants.

fixt.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

My 11 year old is currently serving a one-day out of school suspension for cold-cocking a kid that I have come to find out has been bullying my son for the past year and a half. Was angry at first when I found out about this on Friday, but the more I find out about it, the more I'm glad my boy got a couple of really good shots in on this ####### punk.

He and the other bully, taking their cue from "Diary of a Wimpy Kid" created a game called the "IBJr. Touch". If IBJr. touched you or you touched him, no one would talk to you until you passed it on. About 1/2 of the weak minded 5th graders played along (to their credit, IBJr's friends did not abandon him and refused to participate). The teachers claim to have had no knowledge of this going on.

My son blindsided this kid when he attempted to taunt him further in art class and slammed his head into the desk, cutting his lip.

Good for him.

A 10 year old Pigskin P, after a few months of relentless taunting, snapped in class one day and broke the school bully's nose (he happened to be Dan Fouts's nephew). I stll consider it one of my crowning achievements and my dad celebrated my 3 day suspension with a trip to the amusement park.

Cheers to IBJr.

I liked this story when Tat told it a few years back.

 

[Pigskin P]

My 11 year old is currently serving a one-day out of school suspension for cold-cocking a kid that I have come to find out has been bullying my son for the past year and a half. Was angry at first when I found out about this on Friday, but the more I find out about it, the more I'm glad my boy got a couple of really good shots in on this ####### punk.

He and the other bully, taking their cue from "Diary of a Wimpy Kid" created a game called the "IBJr. Touch". If IBJr. touched you or you touched him, no one would talk to you until you passed it on. About 1/2 of the weak minded 5th graders played along (to their credit, IBJr's friends did not abandon him and refused to participate). The teachers claim to have had no knowledge of this going on.

My son blindsided this kid when he attempted to taunt him further in art class and slammed his head into the desk, cutting his lip.

Good for him.

A 10 year old Pigskin P, after a few months of relentless taunting, snapped in class one day and broke the school bully's nose (he happened to be Dan Fouts's nephew). I stll consider it one of my crowning achievements and my dad celebrated my 3 day suspension with a trip to the amusement park.

Cheers to IBJr.

I liked this story when Tat told it a few years back.

Tat broke the Fouts kid's nose too? Good for him.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

My 11 year old is currently serving a one-day out of school suspension for cold-cocking a kid that I have come to find out has been bullying my son for the past year and a half. Was angry at first when I found out about this on Friday, but the more I find out about it, the more I'm glad my boy got a couple of really good shots in on this ####### punk.

He and the other bully, taking their cue from "Diary of a Wimpy Kid" created a game called the "IBJr. Touch". If IBJr. touched you or you touched him, no one would talk to you until you passed it on. About 1/2 of the weak minded 5th graders played along (to their credit, IBJr's friends did not abandon him and refused to participate). The teachers claim to have had no knowledge of this going on.

My son blindsided this kid when he attempted to taunt him further in art class and slammed his head into the desk, cutting his lip.

Good for him.

A 10 year old Pigskin P, after a few months of relentless taunting, snapped in class one day and broke the school bully's nose (he happened to be Dan Fouts's nephew). I stll consider it one of my crowning achievements and my dad celebrated my 3 day suspension with a trip to the amusement park.

Cheers to IBJr.

I liked this story when Tat told it a few years back.

Tat broke the Fouts kid's nose too? Good for him.

My bad. Tat's dad broke OJ Simpson's cheekbone. I got confused.

 

[General Malaise]

Here's how boring my life is:

I get off on watching the various critters act that come into my yard. I have a bunch of bird feeders hanging off of my deck that is about 12' off the ground. Even though I'm in the mountains, we have a gang (gaggle/herd/flock) of ducks that hang around and the previous owner of my house used to feed the quackers. I stopped doing that, but they still wander up out of habit. Well, this friggin chickadee lights on one of the feeders and throws bird seend off the side (think: Animal House and people throwing beers to everyone). The damned ducks act like Carl Lewis running into my yard to eat when Mr Chickadee does his "FREEDOM" act. I actually have bare spots down there from those suckers.

Then, there's the squirrel. That MFer goes across the street to a walnut tree. He then brings the nut back and either a) buries it in my newly-mulched plant bed, or b) sits on my deck rail and eats it while looking me dead in the eye. I know I'm projecting, but I hear him singing "No More Mr Nice Guy" when he's doing it.

YSR: good luck. If the marriage is worth it, hopefully you guys can get through the next several months. If not, cut your losses. Sucks, but I hung in way too long in both of mine ( ) when there were issues that couldn't be resolved.

Krista: sorry Memphis isn't your thing. I recently lived in an insulated area (think: a square block or two) of Baltimore and got tired of hearing sirens all night. You've always seemed like a big city gal to me, so maybe you could buy Chicago.

Early: congrats?

Tecumseh: best wishes to you and Horatio.

Truck: UConn going ACC?

 

[Guster]

My 11 year old is currently serving a one-day out of school suspension for cold-cocking a kid that I have come to find out has been bullying my son for the past year and a half. Was angry at first when I found out about this on Friday, but the more I find out about it, the more I'm glad my boy got a couple of really good shots in on this ####### punk.

He and the other bully, taking their cue from "Diary of a Wimpy Kid" created a game called the "IBJr. Touch". If IBJr. touched you or you touched him, no one would talk to you until you passed it on. About 1/2 of the weak minded 5th graders played along (to their credit, IBJr's friends did not abandon him and refused to participate). The teachers claim to have had no knowledge of this going on.

My son blindsided this kid when he attempted to taunt him further in art class and slammed his head into the desk, cutting his lip.

Good for him.

I had a situation with Cal last week. Thursday he came home from school and he showed me he had a pocket full of rocks " in case anybody tried to beat him up". I pressed him about it and he quickly changed the subject. Then on Friday after school he was outside playing and he came home really pissed off, actually enraged which in my family looks like this , be cause three boys were pushing him around and throwing stuff at him. Oh yeah and they were all THREE YEARS OLDER than him. I told him to come inside but he hopped on his bike and took off towards the house they were at and said "no, I'm kicking their butts". He returned about 20 minutes later still . I got down on one knee, looked him in the eye and asked him if he was alright. He replied "I got them back.". Then he threw his arms around me and whispered in my ear "they really hurt me daddy" and started bawling. I'

Damn

 

[General Malaise]

Just popped up in my spam:

Hello, what weather? I am very glad that I can write to you! If you not against we could learn each other more close. I think that we could have relations, what you think of it? Please, write to me your Mariya

I'm assuming it's a Sarah Palin alias given the command of the English language, but what's my risk if I respond?

Gotta be more entertaining than the Birdhouse Chronicles.

Yeah, I guess. Ravens play at 4, so I'm bored. Any Girl Scount meetings today?

 

[Good Posting Judge]

Uruk>

Seems doubtful now that the exit fee is up to $10mm. It just isn't worth it for them to jump now, IMO. I think they're just going to snag any team that has any semblance of a decent fb program to try and keep their AQ. It's a mess.

 

[Bob Sacamano]

Hey Sacco

If I can find tickets for games 6 or 7, I'm flying in.

 

[St. Louis Bob]

:( Howd he get them back?

I don't know, he started crying and didn't have a chance to ask. He seemed content with it though and that's what matters.

My 11 year old is currently serving a one-day out of school suspension for cold-cocking a kid that I have come to find out has been bullying my son for the past year and a half. Was angry at first when I found out about this on Friday, but the more I find out about it, the more I'm glad my boy got a couple of really good shots in on this ####### punk.

He and the other bully, taking their cue from "Diary of a Wimpy Kid" created a game called the "IBJr. Touch". If IBJr. touched you or you touched him, no one would talk to you until you passed it on. About 1/2 of the weak minded 5th graders played along (to their credit, IBJr's friends did not abandon him and refused to participate). The teachers claim to have had no knowledge of this going on.

My son blindsided this kid when he attempted to taunt him further in art class and slammed his head into the desk, cutting his lip.

Good for him.

I had a situation with Cal last week. Thursday he came home from school and he showed me he had a pocket full of rocks " in case anybody tried to beat him up". I pressed him about it and he quickly changed the subject. Then on Friday after school he was outside playing and he came home really pissed off, actually enraged which in my family looks like this , be cause three boys were pushing him around and throwing stuff at him. Oh yeah and they were all THREE YEARS OLDER than him. I told him to come inside but he hopped on his bike and took off towards the house they were at and said "no, I'm kicking their butts". He returned about 20 minutes later still . I got down on one knee, looked him in the eye and asked him if he was alright. He replied "I got them back.". Then he threw his arms around me and whispered in my ear "they really hurt me daddy" and started bawling. I'

Glad he took care of it, hope he is doing OK? Makes me want to give my kid a big hug right now...

He's fine. Although the same afternoon one of the kids hit Dylan in the face with a ball and gave him a bloody nose. Dylan didn't cry, he's a lot like me. These kids better be careful.....

Damn

Yeah. For some reason the end of my posting was cut off but it read "I'm happy that he stuck up for himself but it still breaks my heart, again, just thinking about the whole situation."

Hey Sacco

If I can find tickets for games 6 or 7, I'm flying in.

You can finally buy me those beers you owe me.

 

[Hawks64]

My 11 year old is currently serving a one-day out of school suspension for cold-cocking a kid that I have come to find out has been bullying my son for the past year and a half. Was angry at first when I found out about this on Friday, but the more I find out about it, the more I'm glad my boy got a couple of really good shots in on this ####### punk.

He and the other bully, taking their cue from "Diary of a Wimpy Kid" created a game called the "IBJr. Touch". If IBJr. touched you or you touched him, no one would talk to you until you passed it on. About 1/2 of the weak minded 5th graders played along (to their credit, IBJr's friends did not abandon him and refused to participate). The teachers claim to have had no knowledge of this going on.

My son blindsided this kid when he attempted to taunt him further in art class and slammed his head into the desk, cutting his lip.

Good for him.

I had a situation with Cal last week. Thursday he came home from school and he showed me he had a pocket full of rocks " in case anybody tried to beat him up". I pressed him about it and he quickly changed the subject. Then on Friday after school he was outside playing and he came home really pissed off, actually enraged which in my family looks like this , be cause three boys were pushing him around and throwing stuff at him. Oh yeah and they were all THREE YEARS OLDER than him. I told him to come inside but he hopped on his bike and took off towards the house they were at and said "no, I'm kicking their butts". He returned about 20 minutes later still . I got down on one knee, looked him in the eye and asked him if he was alright. He replied "I got them back.". Then he threw his arms around me and whispered in my ear "they really hurt me daddy" and started bawling. I'

:( Just awful.

 

[Good Posting Judge]

I'm thinking of starting some sort of covert group of adults that seriously ####s with these d-bags who pick on kids that are younger/smaller than them. Take them and drop them off out in the woods, plant cocaine in their houses, stick them with needles full of viruses, real black ops type of ####.

 

[Tecumseh]

My 11 year old is currently serving a one-day out of school suspension for cold-cocking a kid that I have come to find out has been bullying my son for the past year and a half. Was angry at first when I found out about this on Friday, but the more I find out about it, the more I'm glad my boy got a couple of really good shots in on this ####### punk.

He and the other bully, taking their cue from "Diary of a Wimpy Kid" created a game called the "IBJr. Touch". If IBJr. touched you or you touched him, no one would talk to you until you passed it on. About 1/2 of the weak minded 5th graders played along (to their credit, IBJr's friends did not abandon him and refused to participate). The teachers claim to have had no knowledge of this going on.

My son blindsided this kid when he attempted to taunt him further in art class and slammed his head into the desk, cutting his lip.

Good for him.

I had a situation with Cal last week. Thursday he came home from school and he showed me he had a pocket full of rocks " in case anybody tried to beat him up". I pressed him about it and he quickly changed the subject. Then on Friday after school he was outside playing and he came home really pissed off, actually enraged which in my family looks like this , be cause three boys were pushing him around and throwing stuff at him. Oh yeah and they were all THREE YEARS OLDER than him. I told him to come inside but he hopped on his bike and took off towards the house they were at and said "no, I'm kicking their butts". He returned about 20 minutes later still . I got down on one knee, looked him in the eye and asked him if he was alright. He replied "I got them back.". Then he threw his arms around me and whispered in my ear "they really hurt me daddy" and started bawling. I'

:( Poor little guy.

 

[St. Louis Bob]

I'm thinking of starting some sort of covert group of adults that seriously ####s with these d-bags who pick on kids that are younger/smaller than them. Take them and drop them off out in the woods, plant cocaine in their houses, stick them with needles full of viruses, real black ops type of ####.

Believe me, the ring leader's dad's face is etched in my mind right now. You seriously don't want to #### with me.

 

[St. Louis Bob]

:( Poor little guy.

He's such a gentle kid that it seemed to me that the insanity that runs in my family skipped right over him. Dylan, not so much.

 

[Tecumseh]

I am both dreading, but somehow looking forward to the first time a bully pushes Ella beyond her breaking point. She's a great, friendly kid, but very passive. She tends to become sad rather than angry, but I've seen her rage surface a time or two. Considering that after this weekend she'll be a 2nd degree black belt, some day some dbag bully may get more than they bargained for.

 

[-fish-]

I am both dreading, but somehow looking forward to the first time a bully pushes Ella beyond her breaking point. She's a great, friendly kid, but very passive. She tends to become sad rather than angry, but I've seen her rage surface a time or two. Considering that after this weekend she'll be a 2nd degree black belt, some day some dbag bully may get more than they bargained for.

based on my experience with my daughter, girls just emotionally cripple each other. it's far more cruel.

 

[Tribulation]

what about a hot dog?

Sandwich.

Eggs benedict?Tuna melt?

For the record, I define a Tuna Melt as half an english muffin, topped with tuna salad, tomato slice and cheese, then melted in the oven.

Not a sandwich unless you can pick it up and hold opposing sides of the bread. Now if you cut eggs benedict in half and sandwiched the contents between the two halves, you'd have a sandwich.

People fold pizza slices and then hold it on the crust and pan sides. Is that a sandwich, shuke?

 

[Good Posting Judge]

I'm thinking of starting some sort of covert group of adults that seriously ####s with these d-bags who pick on kids that are younger/smaller than them. Take them and drop them off out in the woods, plant cocaine in their houses, stick them with needles full of viruses, real black ops type of ####.

Believe me, the ring leader's dad's face is etched in my mind right now. You seriously don't want to #### with me.

Did you ever see the episode of Louie with the bully? It was a pretty fascinating episode of television. I won't give anything away, in case someone wants to track it down.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

I'm thinking of starting some sort of covert group of adults that seriously ####s with these d-bags who pick on kids that are younger/smaller than them. Take them and drop them off out in the woods, plant cocaine in their houses, stick them with needles full of viruses, real black ops type of ####.

About 6 or 7 years ago when my oldest son was a 7th grader at my school I saw him sitting up in the office. I asked him what was going on and he told me that this one particular kid was giving him a hard time. My son said that he knew he was getting really mad so he decided to go to the office to "cool down". I guess this other kid, Jordan, kept saying things to my son in order to piss him off. My boy had a history of getting emotional at times and this Jordan punk figured he could provoke him into doing something stupid. So later in the day I see this Jordan kid waiting to in line to go into the class next to mine and I pulled him aside where nobody else could hear (but people could see). I asked him why he was giving my kid crap. He tried to tell me that he wasn't and/or he was just joking. I told him to just shut up. I also told him "You're lying and you're a jerk. You're also not very smart since I'm a teacher at this school. You've got a 50/50 chance of having me as a teacher next year and I have a very long memory. If I hear that you're picking on ANY kid in ANY way your next year and a half at this school is going to really suck." The kid looked like he was going to crap himself. I don't think he expected me to basically threaten him. Of course he could have gone home and told his parents but I was ready to go with the Richard Vernon approach:What're you gonna do about it? You think anybody's gonna believe you?You think anybody's gonna take your word over mine? I'm a man ofrespect around here. They love me around here, I'm a swell guy...you'rea lying sack of ####! And everybody knows it.

 

[St. Louis Bob]

I need to get a re-occupancy permit to sell my house. So I call the number my realtor gave me but that wasn't the right number because my house is on the north side, so I have to call another number. So I call that number, the stupid phone prompt is messed up because when I hit "2" for "schedule a re-occupancy inspection" it asks me to enter some number from my inspection.

So I finally get a live person and she tells me I need to fill out the application online. Fine. I go online and the link from the form I need goes to "url not found."

So I call back:

Me: You just told me to fill out the re-occupancy permit online but it's a dead link.

Gov: A what?

Me: When you click on the link, it doesn't go to the form.

Gov: Oh yeah, that's going to be down for a few days.

Me: Then why did you tell me to go online?

Gov: You'll need to come to our office to fill it out.

me: Then why did you tell me to online?

Gov: Our address is blah, blah, blah, blah

Me: Then why. Did youuuuuuu tell meeeeee to go online??!

Gov: Sorry, you'll have to come to the office to fill it out.

:headexplode:

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

:( Poor little guy.

He's such a gentle kid that it seemed to me that the insanity that runs in my family skipped right over him. Dylan, not so much.

Any kid that picks on another kid is a creep but a kid that picks on a kid like Cal just needs his ### whipped.

 

[Tribulation]

So my 9yr old daughter made it to the sectionals round of the NFL PPK, which was held today. We have had very little time to practice this week, so we basically had to cram in a session this morning, and that was about it. She has been completely unable to get any elevation when kicking off the tee, and always ended up squibbing it. You only get credit for distance traveled through the air, and accuracy, so I told her to just do her best on punting and passing, and hopefully those would be enough to carry her kickoff number.So we get to the sectionals and there are 7 girls in her age group. She is the 5th to go. I did some unscientific measuring of the total yardage of the girls in front of her. The first 3 didn't do anything extraordinary, and had totals of 31yds, 31 yds, and 28 yds. The 4th girl absolutely crushed her punt, and had good kickoff and passing numbers, and jumped out to 57 yards.Ella was up next. She started off with a 14 yard punt, which is less than she is capable of, and a 13 yard pass, which is also 4-5 yards shorter than I've seen her throw. So she's sitting at 27 yards, and I figure she'll be lucky to get the 4 yards necessary on her kickoff to slip into second place.She tees up the ball, takes a few steps back, and absolutely destroys a 25yd kickoff. People who had no rooting interest and had been silent were cheering. At the end of the day, she wound up solidly in second place, with the official difference being about 7 total yards. She was very happy, and has a very outside chance of attending and competing at a Falcons game (only if the 1st place winner can't go, and then only if her number stands up against the winners in the other sectionals). But I am VERY proud of my girl. She kicked the crap out of that ball.

How do you think she'll match up against the 9-year old Sikh kid with the beard and the turban he can't fit under the helmet?

 

[Pigskin P]

I'm thinking of starting some sort of covert group of adults that seriously ####s with these d-bags who pick on kids that are younger/smaller than them. Take them and drop them off out in the woods, plant cocaine in their houses, stick them with needles full of viruses, real black ops type of ####.

Believe me, the ring leader's dad's face is etched in my mind right now. You seriously don't want to #### with me.

Did you ever see the episode of Louie with the bully? It was a pretty fascinating episode of television. I won't give anything away, in case someone wants to track it down.

That was money. Love what he's doing with that show.

 

[Tribulation]

My 11 year old is currently serving a one-day out of school suspension for cold-cocking a kid that I have come to find out has been bullying my son for the past year and a half. Was angry at first when I found out about this on Friday, but the more I find out about it, the more I'm glad my boy got a couple of really good shots in on this ####### punk.

He and another bully, taking their cue from "Diary of a Wimpy Kid" created a game called the "IBJr. Touch". If IBJr. touched you or you touched him, no one would talk to you until you passed it on. About 1/2 of the weak minded 5th graders played along (to their credit, IBJr's friends did not abandon him and refused to participate). The teachers claim to have had no knowledge of this going on.

My son blindsided this kid when he attempted to taunt him further in art class and slammed his head into the desk, cutting his lip.

Nice. Have your son bring a box of gauze to school and make a show in front of the teacher of nicely giving it to the bully. And then have him look him dead in the eye and cheerily say, "Get well soon!"

 

[cosjobs]

I'm thinking of starting some sort of covert group of adults that seriously ####s with these d-bags who pick on kids that are younger/smaller than them. Take them and drop them off out in the woods, plant cocaine in their houses, stick them with needles full of viruses, real black ops type of ####.

About 6 or 7 years ago when my oldest son was a 7th grader at my school I saw him sitting up in the office. I asked him what was going on and he told me that this one particular kid was giving him a hard time. My son said that he knew he was getting really mad so he decided to go to the office to "cool down". I guess this other kid, Jordan, kept saying things to my son in order to piss him off. My boy had a history of getting emotional at times and this Jordan punk figured he could provoke him into doing something stupid. So later in the day I see this Jordan kid waiting to in line to go into the class next to mine and I pulled him aside where nobody else could hear (but people could see). I asked him why he was giving my kid crap. He tried to tell me that he wasn't and/or he was just joking. I told him to just shut up. I also told him "You're lying and you're a jerk. You're also not very smart since I'm a teacher at this school. You've got a 50/50 chance of having me as a teacher next year and I have a very long memory. If I hear that you're picking on ANY kid in ANY way your next year and a half at this school is going to really suck."

The kid looked like he was going to crap himself. I don't think he expected me to basically threaten him. Of course he could have gone home and told his parents but I was ready to go with the Richard Vernon approach:

What're you gonna do about it? You think anybody's gonna believe you?

You think anybody's gonna take your word over mine? I'm a man of

respect around here. They love me around here, I'm a swell guy...you're

a lying sack of ####! And everybody knows it.

That's what I thought. You're a gutless turd.

 

[Tribulation]

Oh and for the record, I have never ever had phone sex with Homer. Homer, your number still the same?

The serial number on the ankle bracelet?

 

[Tribulation]

on top of all my other ongoing stupidity, last night I received the first ever drunken call from the ex-wife asking if I'd come over. thank god that one just went straight to voicemail.

Maybe she wanted to talk about finances. You could've gotten her when she was in a weakened state. Boy you fumbled that one!(BTW, what did the vm message say?)

she ended up going to the party that I thought I was going to. she actually called me in the evening and asked me if I minded if she went, and said that she thought it might be weird if we both went so I passed. I ended up drinking cocktails at a friend's house and then hitting a bar to meet up with people. she called me a little after midnight and said she was buzzed, had fun, thanked me for not making it weird, and asked if I wanted to come over.I talked to her this morning, and I'm pretty sure she doesn't remember it.

The most disappointing part of splitting up has been the number of people that I thought were "our" friends that are really his friends. I blocked them all from my fb page without defriending. We wouldn't get invited to the same party. Oh and I'm planning a house warming...err drinking party when I move in 2 weeks and realized I have no male friends to invite. All male friends that are just friends are as previously mentioned his friends. All new male friends...well I don't think having every guy I've dated in the one room is a good idea at this point.

That would be one unforgettable party though...

 

[Tribulation]

Not enough booze in the world, boys.

If you and I are ever in a pick-up basketball game together, I pray for humanity that we are not both on the "skins" team.

I'm always afraid a Hawk will swoop in and mistake me for a baby rat when I remove my shirt.

 

[Tribulation]

My 11 year old is currently serving a one-day out of school suspension for cold-cocking a kid that I have come to find out has been bullying my son for the past year and a half. Was angry at first when I found out about this on Friday, but the more I find out about it, the more I'm glad my boy got a couple of really good shots in on this ####### punk.

He and the other bully, taking their cue from "Diary of a Wimpy Kid" created a game called the "IBJr. Touch". If IBJr. touched you or you touched him, no one would talk to you until you passed it on. About 1/2 of the weak minded 5th graders played along (to their credit, IBJr's friends did not abandon him and refused to participate). The teachers claim to have had no knowledge of this going on.

My son blindsided this kid when he attempted to taunt him further in art class and slammed his head into the desk, cutting his lip.

Good for him.

I had a situation with Cal last week. Thursday he came home from school and he showed me he had a pocket full of rocks " in case anybody tried to beat him up". I pressed him about it and he quickly changed the subject. Then on Friday after school he was outside playing and he came home really pissed off, actually enraged which in my family looks like this , be cause three boys were pushing him around and throwing stuff at him. Oh yeah and they were all THREE YEARS OLDER than him. I told him to come inside but he hopped on his bike and took off towards the house they were at and said "no, I'm kicking their butts". He returned about 20 minutes later still . I got down on one knee, looked him in the eye and asked him if he was alright. He replied "I got them back.". Then he threw his arms around me and whispered in my ear "they really hurt me daddy" and started bawling. I'

that sucks, but good for him for standing up for himself.

Yes, and also sharing it with you as his Dad. A lot of boys wouldn't have revealed that - I wouldn't have. It speaks well for his level of trust in you, GBSLB.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

I'm thinking of starting some sort of covert group of adults that seriously ####s with these d-bags who pick on kids that are younger/smaller than them. Take them and drop them off out in the woods, plant cocaine in their houses, stick them with needles full of viruses, real black ops type of ####.

About 6 or 7 years ago when my oldest son was a 7th grader at my school I saw him sitting up in the office. I asked him what was going on and he told me that this one particular kid was giving him a hard time. My son said that he knew he was getting really mad so he decided to go to the office to "cool down". I guess this other kid, Jordan, kept saying things to my son in order to piss him off. My boy had a history of getting emotional at times and this Jordan punk figured he could provoke him into doing something stupid. So later in the day I see this Jordan kid waiting to in line to go into the class next to mine and I pulled him aside where nobody else could hear (but people could see). I asked him why he was giving my kid crap. He tried to tell me that he wasn't and/or he was just joking. I told him to just shut up. I also told him "You're lying and you're a jerk. You're also not very smart since I'm a teacher at this school. You've got a 50/50 chance of having me as a teacher next year and I have a very long memory. If I hear that you're picking on ANY kid in ANY way your next year and a half at this school is going to really suck."

The kid looked like he was going to crap himself. I don't think he expected me to basically threaten him. Of course he could have gone home and told his parents but I was ready to go with the Richard Vernon approach:

What're you gonna do about it? You think anybody's gonna believe you?

You think anybody's gonna take your word over mine? I'm a man of

respect around here. They love me around here, I'm a swell guy...you're

a lying sack of ####! And everybody knows it.

That's what I thought. You're a gutless turd.

And he was.

 

[Tribulation]

I am both dreading, but somehow looking forward to the first time a bully pushes Ella beyond her breaking point. She's a great, friendly kid, but very passive. She tends to become sad rather than angry, but I've seen her rage surface a time or two. Considering that after this weekend she'll be a 2nd degree black belt, some day some dbag bully may get more than they bargained for.

based on my experience with my daughter, girls just emotionally cripple each other. it's far more cruel.

My sister, who was always athletic and larger than girls in her grade, was picked on in 4th grade by this kid who was two years older than her. She kicked the crap out of him. Turned out that he was being a Richard because he liked her.

 

[Disco Stu]

Effin Zooks. During an intimate moment this weekend all I could think of was Spud Webb trying to box out Bill Walton. I hate you.

 

[General Malaise]

Sandwiches come with a choice of bread. If I order something and they say 'wheat, white, rye, sourdough?' it's a sandwich. Burgers, burritos, pitas, hotdogs, lobster rolls, pies don't typically come with a choice of breads.The end.

What if the burrito joint offers a choice of corn or flour tortilla?

It's a burrito. And Shuke calling a hot dog a sandwich is a load of BS.