GM's thread about nothing (38 Viewers)

[Bob Sacamano]

I'm no Smoo, but I'm socially inept enough that I have to ask (apparently). Why are people congratulating him on knowing he's having a girl? You congratulated him when he said he was having a kid. That kid was a girl then. He wasn't sitting around praying to jeebus for a girl or writing letters to Rite-Aid asking for their assistance in procuring a female. What's the deal here?

I didn't get it either but wasn't going to say anything.

I'm just curious as to what kind of "interesting" name he comes up with for this kid.

Oh, it's pretty much nailed down and if you search this board of Joe's long and hard enough, you might just see me hint at it. I think.

Oh, god. You're going to name her Tillamook, aren't you?

 

[Drifter]

I ####### hate corporate speak. Was CC'd on this email to my boss and my boss's boss:

I have reached out to XXX to understand the issue and obtain details that I can bring to XXXX to drive resolution. We had a similar complaint in XXXX that we were able to resolve quickly and I expect this to be no different. I will keep you informed regarding corrective actions by XXXX.

WTF?! What I would have said, "I'm collecting more information on this. At first glance it looks similar to the problem we had at XXXX. I'll let you know when I have more information and what we are doing to fix it."Why the BS? I always tell myself that the higher ups see through this ####, but I'm not always so sure and I can't bring myself to pile on the BS even if it means getting ahead faster.

 

[Marvin]

I ####### hate corporate speak. Was CC'd on this email to my boss and my boss's boss:

I have reached out to XXX to understand the issue and obtain details that I can bring to XXXX to drive resolution. We had a similar complaint in XXXX that we were able to resolve quickly and I expect this to be no different. I will keep you informed regarding corrective actions by XXXX.

WTF?! What I would have said, "I'm collecting more information on this. At first glance it looks similar to the problem we had at XXXX. I'll let you know when I have more information and what we are doing to fix it."Why the BS? I always tell myself that the higher ups see through this ####, but I'm not always so sure and I can't bring myself to pile on the BS even if it means getting ahead faster.

Drifter,I the name of synergy I would get on board with this. You want seamless integration when it comes to hunkering down and pacesetting. A lot of this is above my pay-grade but I'm not pushing rope here.

 

[B-Deep]

I ####### hate corporate speak. Was CC'd on this email to my boss and my boss's boss:

I have reached out to XXX to understand the issue and obtain details that I can bring to XXXX to drive resolution. We had a similar complaint in XXXX that we were able to resolve quickly and I expect this to be no different. I will keep you informed regarding corrective actions by XXXX.

WTF?! What I would have said, "I'm collecting more information on this. At first glance it looks similar to the problem we had at XXXX. I'll let you know when I have more information and what we are doing to fix it."Why the BS? I always tell myself that the higher ups see through this ####, but I'm not always so sure and I can't bring myself to pile on the BS even if it means getting ahead faster.

Drifter,I the name of synergy I would get on board with this. You want seamless integration when it comes to hunkering down and pacesetting. A lot of this is above my pay-grade but I'm not pushing rope here.

When our mission statement stumbles, a vision of cross-functioning multitasked business decision-ware will emerge.

 

[General Malaise]

I ####### hate corporate speak. Was CC'd on this email to my boss and my boss's boss:

I have reached out to XXX to understand the issue and obtain details that I can bring to XXXX to drive resolution. We had a similar complaint in XXXX that we were able to resolve quickly and I expect this to be no different. I will keep you informed regarding corrective actions by XXXX.

WTF?! What I would have said, "I'm collecting more information on this. At first glance it looks similar to the problem we had at XXXX. I'll let you know when I have more information and what we are doing to fix it."Why the BS? I always tell myself that the higher ups see through this ####, but I'm not always so sure and I can't bring myself to pile on the BS even if it means getting ahead faster.

Drifter,I the name of synergy I would get on board with this. You want seamless integration when it comes to hunkering down and pacesetting. A lot of this is above my pay-grade but I'm not pushing rope here.

When our mission statement stumbles, a vision of cross-functioning multitasked business decision-ware will emerge.

At the end of the day, I like turtles.

 

[Homer J Simpson]

So usually during a day shift (12-7) my back will start hurting around 3 or 4, which is not coincidentally when I usually start boozing heavily. Today, however, my back has been absolutely killing me since 8am. I'm talking I can barely stand up straight...this is gonna be a horrible day. Time to start pounding vodka. Also, can someone fax me a couple of Vicodins? Thx!

Start banging chicks in bed instead of the bathroom stall you might have a bit more luck with the back.

X 43

 

[Marvin]

I ####### hate corporate speak. Was CC'd on this email to my boss and my boss's boss:

I have reached out to XXX to understand the issue and obtain details that I can bring to XXXX to drive resolution. We had a similar complaint in XXXX that we were able to resolve quickly and I expect this to be no different. I will keep you informed regarding corrective actions by XXXX.

WTF?! What I would have said, "I'm collecting more information on this. At first glance it looks similar to the problem we had at XXXX. I'll let you know when I have more information and what we are doing to fix it."Why the BS? I always tell myself that the higher ups see through this ####, but I'm not always so sure and I can't bring myself to pile on the BS even if it means getting ahead faster.

Drifter,I the name of synergy I would get on board with this. You want seamless integration when it comes to hunkering down and pacesetting. A lot of this is above my pay-grade but I'm not pushing rope here.

When our mission statement stumbles, a vision of cross-functioning multitasked business decision-ware will emerge.

I think we're both looking through the same lens here. But then again this isn't the long pole in my tent. I've got to travel-dazzle one of the suits next week in The MIA.

 

[jplvr]

I just scrolled through the last 5 pages or so at warp speed. I really don't know why I did it, because I barely read anything.

Oh well.

 

[YSR]

I ####### hate corporate speak. Was CC'd on this email to my boss and my boss's boss:

I have reached out to XXX to understand the issue and obtain details that I can bring to XXXX to drive resolution. We had a similar complaint in XXXX that we were able to resolve quickly and I expect this to be no different. I will keep you informed regarding corrective actions by XXXX.

WTF?! What I would have said, "I'm collecting more information on this. At first glance it looks similar to the problem we had at XXXX. I'll let you know when I have more information and what we are doing to fix it."Why the BS? I always tell myself that the higher ups see through this ####, but I'm not always so sure and I can't bring myself to pile on the BS even if it means getting ahead faster.

Drifter,I the name of synergy I would get on board with this. You want seamless integration when it comes to hunkering down and pacesetting. A lot of this is above my pay-grade but I'm not pushing rope here.

When our mission statement stumbles, a vision of cross-functioning multitasked business decision-ware will emerge.

I think we're both looking through the same lens here. But then again this isn't the long pole in my tent. I've got to travel-dazzle one of the suits next week in The MIA.

I'll plan to circle around with you guys next week to see where we are.

 

[Marvin]

I ####### hate corporate speak. Was CC'd on this email to my boss and my boss's boss:

I have reached out to XXX to understand the issue and obtain details that I can bring to XXXX to drive resolution. We had a similar complaint in XXXX that we were able to resolve quickly and I expect this to be no different. I will keep you informed regarding corrective actions by XXXX.

WTF?! What I would have said, "I'm collecting more information on this. At first glance it looks similar to the problem we had at XXXX. I'll let you know when I have more information and what we are doing to fix it."Why the BS? I always tell myself that the higher ups see through this ####, but I'm not always so sure and I can't bring myself to pile on the BS even if it means getting ahead faster.

Drifter,I the name of synergy I would get on board with this. You want seamless integration when it comes to hunkering down and pacesetting. A lot of this is above my pay-grade but I'm not pushing rope here.

When our mission statement stumbles, a vision of cross-functioning multitasked business decision-ware will emerge.

I think we're both looking through the same lens here. But then again this isn't the long pole in my tent. I've got to travel-dazzle one of the suits next week in The MIA.

I'll plan to circle around with you guys next week to see where we are.

There's no magic bullet here. We need to put on our big-boy pants and TCB other than low hanging fruit.

 

[DMXATF23]

I ####### hate corporate speak. Was CC'd on this email to my boss and my boss's boss:

I have reached out to XXX to understand the issue and obtain details that I can bring to XXXX to drive resolution. We had a similar complaint in XXXX that we were able to resolve quickly and I expect this to be no different. I will keep you informed regarding corrective actions by XXXX.

WTF?! What I would have said, "I'm collecting more information on this. At first glance it looks similar to the problem we had at XXXX. I'll let you know when I have more information and what we are doing to fix it."Why the BS? I always tell myself that the higher ups see through this ####, but I'm not always so sure and I can't bring myself to pile on the BS even if it means getting ahead faster.

Drifter,I the name of synergy I would get on board with this. You want seamless integration when it comes to hunkering down and pacesetting. A lot of this is above my pay-grade but I'm not pushing rope here.

When our mission statement stumbles, a vision of cross-functioning multitasked business decision-ware will emerge.

I think we're both looking through the same lens here. But then again this isn't the long pole in my tent. I've got to travel-dazzle one of the suits next week in The MIA.

I'll plan to circle around with you guys next week to see where we are.

There's no magic bullet here. We need to put on our big-boy pants and TCB other than low hanging fruit.

Essentially, our metrics are all wrong.

 

[Homer J Simpson]

You guys should watch the Jeopardy teen tournament tonight.

 

[Tecumseh]

Still the best commercial on TV.

I LOVE that commercial. Right up there with this one for me.

 

[Marvin]

Still the best commercial on TV.

I LOVE that commercial. Right up there with this one for me.

I every time the guy gets the password right and the tiger gives the other guy that look.Moar

Moar II

 

[Annyong]

Think I broke a sweat in the shower. Then I'm pretty sure I lost a full shoe size when I finally clipped my toenails.

 

[Mr. Pickles]

Or shuke shaving in the lake?

So glad I took that pic.

 

[Bogart]

GenericCorporateChat activated.

 

[General Malaise]

Or shuke shaving in the lake?

So glad I took that pic.

It truly was his WC Fields moment. There are some lake pictures that need to die, though.

 

[YSR]

You guys should watch the Jeopardy teen tournament tonight.

I DVR Jeopardy every night.

 

[bentley]

Signed up for the UFO Club at The Flying Saucer last night. Drink 200 different beers and they put a plate with your name and witty saying up on the wall (and give you a party with a $100 bar tab).Because, well, I need goals in my life.Now taking applications for GMTAN approved shtick for said witty saying.

The thing that sucks about that club is that you can only take credit for 3 at a sitting. When I made the 101 Club at BB Rovers, I knocked out 9 on the final day while watching football.

 

[Guster]

You guys should watch the Jeopardy teen tournament tonight.

I DVR Jeopardy every night.

Hoping to catch the episode with a certain FBGer on reruns?

 

[Mr.Pack]

I thought teh Crue did "Girls Girls Girls".

 

[Mr.Pack]

I think I just like saying the word 'daughter'. 10 years of parenting and I've never even considered the word. Feels....pretty cool.

It is!

 

[Mr.Pack]

Congrats GM on the new daughter.I have one of each and the relationship is very very different, and very cool for both. You get Daddy/Daughter dances now, tea parties now, "Dad, look at my pretty dress/shoes/bow". I'm very lucky that I get rock star welcomes from both of my kids, but my daughter's presentation adds just a little bit that can't be explained.Besides, now you can use the joke, "Well, with [insert son's name here], I only had to worry about one ####, now I have to worry about ALL of them.

Don't forget about the Daddy/Daughter dance recitals! Cannot wait to hear those stories! If I can find it, one day I'll post the pic of me and my daughter from her Daddy/Daughter dance recital. We danced to "Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy"

 

[mr. furley]

I would love to try Porkslap Pale Ale

My link

Butternuts beers are not too shabby

 

[urbanhack]

I would love to try Porkslap Pale Ale

My link

Butternuts beers are not too shabby

porkbutt is HUGE fan.

 

[Tecumseh]

At the Intl Roofing Expo. The girl in the booth across from me is a solid 8.5. Will try to get pics.

Updates as necessary...

we are waiting... knob

Relax, nerd.I have 1 pic, trying to upload to imageshack. May have to wait until tonight.

This pic doesn't begin to do her justice.

 

[Guster]

At the Intl Roofing Expo. The girl in the booth across from me is a solid 8.5. Will try to get pics.

Updates as necessary...

we are waiting... knob

Relax, nerd.I have 1 pic, trying to upload to imageshack. May have to wait until tonight.

This pic doesn't begin to do her justice.

I'd give her shingles

 

[Guster]

So, it appears as though I got drunk on Tuesday night and committed to being my daughter's assistant soccer coach.

I'm going to miss three out of the eight games, so that part is awesome

Oh and while I played soccer for 6 years growing up, I wasnt good.

This should e really interesting.

I'll make sure to get a GM-coach inspired pic if the moment is right

 

[proninja]

New word I learned today: Tumescence

 

[General Malaise]

You guys should watch the Jeopardy teen tournament tonight.

I DVR Jeopardy every night.

Every victory I earn over you in Scrabble is a feather in my cap. You are a smart smart smart smart woman.

 

[General Malaise]

So, it appears as though I got drunk on Tuesday night and committed to being my daughter's assistant soccer coach. I'm going to miss three out of the eight games, so that part is awesome Oh and while I played soccer for 6 years growing up, I wasnt good. This should e really interesting. I'll make sure to get a GM-coach inspired pic if the moment is right

gimme a call, gb. i'll coach you through this. Pro Tip: get MORE involved NOW. Take Charge. Be There.Oh, and I sucked at every sport I now coach. Best coaches sucked. Call me,gb.

 

[General Malaise]

So, it appears as though I got drunk on Tuesday night and committed to being my daughter's assistant soccer coach. I'm going to miss three out of the eight games, so that part is awesome Oh and while I played soccer for 6 years growing up, I wasnt good. This should e really interesting. I'll make sure to get a GM-coach inspired pic if the moment is right

gimme a call, gb. i'll coach you through this. Pro Tip: get MORE involved NOW. Take Charge. Be There.Oh, and I sucked at every sport I now coach. Best coaches sucked. Call me,gb.

Well, don't call me now...at a sober hour. Homer's 10:45EST.

 

[General Malaise]

Congrats GM on the new daughter.I have one of each and the relationship is very very different, and very cool for both. You get Daddy/Daughter dances now, tea parties now, "Dad, look at my pretty dress/shoes/bow". I'm very lucky that I get rock star welcomes from both of my kids, but my daughter's presentation adds just a little bit that can't be explained.Besides, now you can use the joke, "Well, with [insert son's name here], I only had to worry about one ####, now I have to worry about ALL of them.

Don't forget about the Daddy/Daughter dance recitals! Cannot wait to hear those stories! If I can find it, one day I'll post the pic of me and my daughter from her Daddy/Daughter dance recital. We danced to "Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy"

Wife and I both agree...no dance. Just sports.My buddies with co-workers spend up to 10 hours a weekend in dance recitals. Wife and I are 1000000000000% against this. Don't judge those who are down with this, but we're going sports, sports, camp, fish, sports. Dance will never, ever happen to me.

 

[Homer J Simpson]

I've been awake for 29.5 hours. And drunk for 13 of them. Ha!

 

[Annyong]

Congrats GM on the new daughter.I have one of each and the relationship is very very different, and very cool for both. You get Daddy/Daughter dances now, tea parties now, "Dad, look at my pretty dress/shoes/bow". I'm very lucky that I get rock star welcomes from both of my kids, but my daughter's presentation adds just a little bit that can't be explained.Besides, now you can use the joke, "Well, with [insert son's name here], I only had to worry about one ####, now I have to worry about ALL of them.

Don't forget about the Daddy/Daughter dance recitals! Cannot wait to hear those stories! If I can find it, one day I'll post the pic of me and my daughter from her Daddy/Daughter dance recital. We danced to "Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy"

Wife and I both agree...no dance. Just sports.My buddies with co-workers spend up to 10 hours a weekend in dance recitals. Wife and I are 1000000000000% against this. Don't judge those who are down with this, but we're going sports, sports, camp, fish, sports. Dance will never, ever happen to me.

how about music? guitar or piano? or some sort of piano-guitar hybrid?

 

[Homer J Simpson]

Congrats GM on the new daughter.I have one of each and the relationship is very very different, and very cool for both. You get Daddy/Daughter dances now, tea parties now, "Dad, look at my pretty dress/shoes/bow". I'm very lucky that I get rock star welcomes from both of my kids, but my daughter's presentation adds just a little bit that can't be explained.Besides, now you can use the joke, "Well, with [insert son's name here], I only had to worry about one ####, now I have to worry about ALL of them.

Don't forget about the Daddy/Daughter dance recitals! Cannot wait to hear those stories! If I can find it, one day I'll post the pic of me and my daughter from her Daddy/Daughter dance recital. We danced to "Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy"

Wife and I both agree...no dance. Just sports.My buddies with co-workers spend up to 10 hours a weekend in dance recitals. Wife and I are 1000000000000% against this. Don't judge those who are down with this, but we're going sports, sports, camp, fish, sports. Dance will never, ever happen to me.

how about music? guitar or piano? or some sort of piano-guitar hybrid?

Guano?

 

[YSR]

Congrats GM on the new daughter.I have one of each and the relationship is very very different, and very cool for both. You get Daddy/Daughter dances now, tea parties now, "Dad, look at my pretty dress/shoes/bow". I'm very lucky that I get rock star welcomes from both of my kids, but my daughter's presentation adds just a little bit that can't be explained.Besides, now you can use the joke, "Well, with [insert son's name here], I only had to worry about one ####, now I have to worry about ALL of them.

Don't forget about the Daddy/Daughter dance recitals! Cannot wait to hear those stories! If I can find it, one day I'll post the pic of me and my daughter from her Daddy/Daughter dance recital. We danced to "Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy"

Wife and I both agree...no dance. Just sports.My buddies with co-workers spend up to 10 hours a weekend in dance recitals. Wife and I are 1000000000000% against this. Don't judge those who are down with this, but we're going sports, sports, camp, fish, sports. Dance will never, ever happen to me.

how about music? guitar or piano? or some sort of piano-guitar hybrid?

Guano?

I think I drank that in Honduras once.

 

[Bob Sacamano]

Congrats GM on the new daughter.I have one of each and the relationship is very very different, and very cool for both. You get Daddy/Daughter dances now, tea parties now, "Dad, look at my pretty dress/shoes/bow". I'm very lucky that I get rock star welcomes from both of my kids, but my daughter's presentation adds just a little bit that can't be explained.Besides, now you can use the joke, "Well, with [insert son's name here], I only had to worry about one ####, now I have to worry about ALL of them.

Don't forget about the Daddy/Daughter dance recitals! Cannot wait to hear those stories! If I can find it, one day I'll post the pic of me and my daughter from her Daddy/Daughter dance recital. We danced to "Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy"

Wife and I both agree...no dance. Just sports.My buddies with co-workers spend up to 10 hours a weekend in dance recitals. Wife and I are 1000000000000% against this. Don't judge those who are down with this, but we're going sports, sports, camp, fish, sports. Dance will never, ever happen to me.

how about music? guitar or piano? or some sort of piano-guitar hybrid?

Guano?

I think I drank that in Honduras once.

Was that before you turned into Batgirl?

 

[Annyong]

Anyone here ever get high before going to the dentist?

 

[Homer J Simpson]

Anyone here ever get high before going to the dentist?

Wouldn't that be like whacking Kobayashi before going to a brothel?

 

[Annyong]

Anyone here ever get high before going to the dentist?

Wouldn't that be like whacking Kobayashi before going to a brothel?

yeah but they are gong to gimmie the gas for a cleaning are they?

 

[Homer J Simpson]

Anyone here ever get high before going to the dentist?

Wouldn't that be like whacking Kobayashi before going to a brothel?

yeah but they are gong to gimmie the gas for a cleaning are they?

True. Smoke up, brutha.

 

[Bogart]

Anyone here ever get high before going to the dentist?

Wouldn't that be like whacking Kobayashi before going to a brothel?

yeah but they are gong to gimmie the gas for a cleaning are they?

If you ask and act really nervous about getting them clean they will. A relaxed patient is a patient that doesn't bite.

 

[B-Deep]

Anyone here ever get high before going to the dentist?

i knew someone who used to do this routinely

 

[Homer J Simpson]

Anyone here ever get high before going to the dentist?

i knew someone who used to do this routinely

Dentist?

 

[Mr.Pack]

Congrats GM on the new daughter.I have one of each and the relationship is very very different, and very cool for both. You get Daddy/Daughter dances now, tea parties now, "Dad, look at my pretty dress/shoes/bow". I'm very lucky that I get rock star welcomes from both of my kids, but my daughter's presentation adds just a little bit that can't be explained.Besides, now you can use the joke, "Well, with [insert son's name here], I only had to worry about one ####, now I have to worry about ALL of them.

Don't forget about the Daddy/Daughter dance recitals! Cannot wait to hear those stories! If I can find it, one day I'll post the pic of me and my daughter from her Daddy/Daughter dance recital. We danced to "Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy"

Wife and I both agree...no dance. Just sports.My buddies with co-workers spend up to 10 hours a weekend in dance recitals. Wife and I are 1000000000000% against this. Don't judge those who are down with this, but we're going sports, sports, camp, fish, sports. Dance will never, ever happen to me.

how about music? guitar or piano? or some sort of piano-guitar hybrid?

No question about it, piano is a definite must.

 

[Mr.Pack]

One week into WeightWatchers, I lost 5lbs.

Actually only 4 days as I officially weighed in last Thursday but didn't fully start until Monday.

 

[Marvin]

You guys should watch the Jeopardy teen tournament tonight.

I DVR Jeopardy every night.

That show is rigged.

 

[Marvin]

Apologies to those who were texted last night. Before I went to bed I deleted all my messages. I vaguely remember my wife taking my phone and possibly seeing noods.