What's new
Fantasy Football - Footballguys Forums

This is a sample guest message. Register a free account today to become a member! Once signed in, you'll be able to participate on this site by adding your own topics and posts, as well as connect with other members through your own private inbox!

GM's thread about nothing (25 Viewers)

I'm about 3 hours in to a 13.5 hour drive back from Boston to Cincinnati. Had a fun at patty's weekend, but surprisingly never got completely wasted. I've got the late driving shift but can't sleep right now, so I'm pretty much f'd.

 
'krista4 said:
Just so you can all be depressed as I, I offer the latest message from my friend's cat:

Dear Aunt Krista: Double L here. Today is the Ides of March and you know what that means. It is my TENTH BIRTHDAY! Mom said I could do whatever I wanted to do today. So, I slept and just got up from my day long nap on our bed. I think I'll have a little snack and call it a day. A girl needs her beauty rest. Mom tells me that I am beautiful every day. I know it's because I get proper sleep.How are all of my cousins? How are you? Tell ME everything! Love, ME
Click to expand...
I don't even know how to express this.
Click to expand...
Damn. I mean just, DAMN.(sorry for the Hippling)
 
'Guster said:
I'm about 3 hours in to a 13.5 hour drive back from Boston to Cincinnati. Had a fun at patty's weekend, but surprisingly never got completely wasted. I've got the late driving shift but can't sleep right now, so I'm pretty much f'd.
Click to expand...
I just got in from Pitt. We should have timed this right and met up at a reststop. This wasn't meant to sound as gay as it sounds.
 
And we just got pulled over. Driver was going 80 in a 55 in a "safety corridor" and the cop also said he didn't use his signal when switching lanes. It'll be interesting to see how much this ticket is...

 
'Jeff Vader said:
'Guster said:
I'm about 3 hours in to a 13.5 hour drive back from Boston to Cincinnati. Had a fun at patty's weekend, but surprisingly never got completely wasted. I've got the late driving shift but can't sleep right now, so I'm pretty much f'd.
Click to expand...
I just got in from Pitt. We should have timed this right and met up at a reststop. This wasn't meant to sound as gay as it sounds.
Click to expand...
Was that you tapping your foot under the stall in the bathroom??
 
'Guster said:
And we just got pulled over. Driver was going 80 in a 55 in a "safety corridor" and the cop also said he didn't use his signal when switching lanes. It'll be interesting to see how much this ticket is...
Click to expand...
That is going to be bad. Double fines in many states.I also got pulled over. Only 80 in a 65, but it still sucked.

I was polite and tried to gently talk my way out of it. He gave me a ticket anyway and, without a hint of irony, said it was a "pleasure" seeing me. He really meant it in a nice way.

:mellow:

 
'Jeff Vader said:
'Guster said:
And we just got pulled over. Driver was going 80 in a 55 in a "safety corridor" and the cop also said he didn't use his signal when switching lanes. It'll be interesting to see how much this ticket is...
Click to expand...
That is going to be bad. Double fines in many states.I also got pulled over. Only 80 in a 65, but it still sucked.

I was polite and tried to gently talk my way out of it. He gave me a ticket anyway and, without a hint of irony, said it was a "pleasure" seeing me. He really meant it in a nice way.

:mellow:
Click to expand...
The sign right in front of where we pulled over mentioned the double fine. He gave us a warning for the lane change without signaling and lack of registration (the girl whose car it is had taken out the registration when she paid a ticket she got recently). That could have been WAY worse. We'll likely split it 4 ways to lessen the pain
 
'Guster said:
'Jeff Vader said:
'Guster said:
And we just got pulled over. Driver was going 80 in a 55 in a "safety corridor" and the cop also said he didn't use his signal when switching lanes. It'll be interesting to see how much this ticket is...
Click to expand...
That is going to be bad. Double fines in many states.I also got pulled over. Only 80 in a 65, but it still sucked.

I was polite and tried to gently talk my way out of it. He gave me a ticket anyway and, without a hint of irony, said it was a "pleasure" seeing me. He really meant it in a nice way.

:mellow:
Click to expand...
The sign right in front of where we pulled over mentioned the double fine. He gave us a warning for the lane change without signaling and lack of registration (the girl whose car it is had taken out the registration when she paid a ticket she got recently). That could have been WAY worse. We'll likely split it 4 ways to lessen the pain
Click to expand...
She sounds like a public menace.
 
This may be a little inside for non-Austinites, but I'm shocked and offended that someone I know posted "Don't Dallas my Austin" on their Facebook wall. Now, I agree completely with the sentiment, but this guy is a CrossFitting, L-I-V-I-N, Ed Hardy wearing, bro this and bro that kinda guy who doesn't go to a place that doesn't have bottle service, posted two dozen shots from opening night at the Ghost Bar in the new W hotel in Austin and wears his hair with one of those douchey spikes in the middle. I can't imagine that anyone could be more Dallas.

 
I am running on fumes right now. I thought about posting before I left.. I even typed up a post before leaving, but thought I'd jinx things. Anyway, the weather here broke and the Gulf of Mexico was beautiful for the first time in a while. I spent at least 20 hours on the water on Friday and Saturday and couldn't be happier, eventhough we only caught one legal, keeper fish.

We spent Friday afternoon trekking 45 miles offshore to find bluewater. It was just me and my best friend on his 23' boat, so we were testing our limits for sure, but the weather and water couldn't have been more perfect. We didn't have much to show for it, but considering we are total novices to the type of fishing we were attempting, we did ok. We caught a bontio about 5 minutes into things, but then hooked a wahoo a bit later. I saw it jump, but it landed sideways in the water and pulled the hook. It would've been a first for the two of us, but luck wasn't on our side. I'm pretty sure we saw 50 sea turtles, and I caught a glimpse of some whales which was great as I had never been out far enough to see something like that. On the way in, we found a spot loaded with the biggest red snapper I've ever caught. They whipped our butts, but we landed about 15 before calling it a day.

We spent most of Saturday surrounded by fog trying to make it to one of our favorite spots, but stuck with it long enough for the fog to finally break at 2:45PM. We couldn't make it to our target, but changed plans and managed to boat some fish for dinner.

After spending half the day cleaning the boat, I thought there was a decent chance I'd fall asleep driving home. As luck would have it, another friend called me an hour into the trip today. His boss just bought a 70' yacht (sportfisher) currently docked in Los Angeles. They were planning to ship it here on a cargo carrier, but have since decided to fish it around and through the Panama Canal. My friend was calling to inform me to be ready at a moment's notice to fly to places like Cabo, Costa Rica, and Panama to fish the boat around over the course of the Spring and Summer. All I have to do is buy a plane ticket to spend 10 days on that monster fishing some of the best fishing spots on the planet if I get the nod. I was jacked up for the rest of the drive home. It's going to be a rough day when I explain I'm taking 10 days off to go fishing in Panama (or 10 days in one of the other legs of the trip), but there's a good possibility that could happen a couple of times because of a Cabo or Costa Rica trip as well. I'll be going, regardless of consequences. Considering what they'll be doing on any of those trips, it's theoretically about a $20-30k trip for which I'll only be responsible for arriving on a plane.

I'm on limitted sleep for the second straight weekend, but I'm having trouble getting to sleep tonight for totally different reasons.

I'll post some pics tomorrow when I get the time. There's a shuke-est moment in one of the pics my buddy snapped. I'll try to dig up the comparable shuke moment I thought of when I first saw the pic.

I think I've had about 12 hours of sleep since Wednesday.

 
'St. Louis Bob said:
So instead of going downtown or Dogtown for St. Patrick's Day we went to a local parade. (BTW, according to the new sign posted, I now live in a city with a population slightly over 11k. Of course it borders a city with 88k but still. FML) Anyhow, Mrs. SLB wanted to run the 5k and I agreed to take the boys and meet up with her later at my GB's place to watch the parade. Now I normally try to avoid things like this as if it would give me genital warts but I am/was desperate to reconnect with friends that live out here. I seriously have a Shining thing going on. The good news is that I may win father of the year because I am seemingly with my family 24/7. The bad news is I'm working constantly too and all work and no play makes bob go something, something. So on our way to the parade I was more than a little concerned about the unbelieavle horde of green wearing drunks everywhere. My concerns were later confirmed when it became very clear that the closest parking spot would be almost a mile away. The tactical error of not packing the cooler the night before and having Mrs. SLB take it then hit me the way Thorn does shots of schnapps. Two kids, a heavy cooler, about 200k people from what I could tell and about a mile walk. Purrfect. I was quickly distracted by the large numbers of 22 (apparently that is the number we are using now for all girls under 30) year old girls dressed Irish Slutty ™. I think the torn fish net stockings with short skirts were my favorite but knee high socks with short skirts were pretty good too. We arrive at our destination in no time and it is only then I realize people are 8 rows deep to watch the parade. So I found a couple of old friends promised to play in their kids charity poker tournament and I think I even offered to pay one person to come over to my house and hang out with me. All was going as planned. Connections were being made. I was being welcomed to the new neighborhood. Nice. Then the clouds started rolling in. The next thing I know lightening is streaking across the sky, thunder is making the kids cry and people were scrambling everywhere for cover. My boys were remarkably calm however and were happy that we managed to secure a table with an umbrella. Of course Cal then suggested this wasn't a bright idea sitting on metal chairs under an umbrella with a metal pole during a thunderstorm. I agreed and we took cover under a large tent and they were out of beer. I had plenty of beer. People were offering to pay me five bucks a beer but I declined and started handing out beers. Good times. Apparently some people decided to pay me anyway though because when I got home I had a bunch of ones and fives stuffed in my pocket. So we waited it our for about an hour and I was soaking wet after taking the boys to the port-o-poop, separately of course. The rain finally relented and we decided to start walking. Dylan was holding my hand and Mrs. SLB had Cal's hand. Dylan is very competitive and considers everything a contest so we were "losing" to everybody walking ahead of us. So we were walking faster and faster with Dylan taking the time to jump in EVERY puddle of water on our quest to "win". There were now 40 or so people between us and Mrs. SLB so I motioned to her I would take Dylan with me and we continued on our way as they turned the corner to go to her car. Then the skies opened up again and began to pour down raining of course the copious amounts of lighting bolts were more of a concern to me. That and the fact it was raining to hard I could barely see. When we finally made it to my car we were soaked to the bone. Dylan had a great time though, was giggling like the little kid he is and asked me to put Crazy Train on for the ride home. I complied with his request and were both screaming at the tops of our voices when I noticed the roads were all flooded. My cars is 4WD so I didn't have too much of a problem but I was concerned about my wife & Cal. I was really concerned when we were home for 45 minutes to an hour before them. I had her phone in my pocket because I somehow got lucky enough to find a ziplock bag to put our phones in. Me & the boys ended up spending the rest of the day in the garage watching basketball and talking as I drank whiskeys. They even wiped off both of our cars. Fun day.
Click to expand...
Paragraphs, GB. They are your friend.
 
I didn't know shuke was entered in the Urban Dictionary, but I was also surprised when I didn't find any pictures on an image search. Does anyone have that secret santa pic saved with him in the cereal box beanie?

I thought this looked similar, and totally by accident.

http://i43.photobucket.com/albums/e378/jplvr/IMG_0578.jpg

Also, digging around in old :11: threads is interesting.

 
Last edited by a moderator:
'Guster said:
'General Malaise said:
'Guster said:
interesting development on the random make-out chick front... I was checking Facebook before going to bed on Tuesday night and saw that she had posted "I'm going to be a mom again" as her status update.

I did some quick math to see when the last time we had hooked up was and if there was any chance it could be mine. Technically if she had only missed one period and finally caught on when she was missing for a second time, then there was a very small chance. :unsure:

I woke up the next morning and she had deleted the post. Since then she has put up some cryptic messages about hating men, needing prayers, etc.

The fact that she hasn't contacted me is enough for me to confirm I'm in the clear, but that would be some seriously bad news!
Click to expand...
Hold up....you had sex with this woman recentlyish and now she is claiming - ON FACEBOOK - that she is going to be a mom and that she hates men. Remind me - is this the one who enjoyed sexual acts in front of transients? How'd that break-up go between you two? In the clear? Really? That's what we're going with on this holy St. Rufus of a Feces holiday?
Click to expand...
Yeah, that'd be the girl. There wasn't really a breakup, we just kinda stopped texting. I didn't want to push it and come across as being desperate.
Click to expand...
When I read things like this, I just want to reach out to each and every one of you who is dating in this day and age and punch you in the ear.
 
'Frostillicus said:
'Aaron Rudnicki said:
'Frostillicus said:
My pocket dialed both TUpside and Krista yesterday at various points when I was at the bar from 11am-3am in Chicago watching basketball.
Click to expand...
good to see you
Click to expand...
I told my friends we should go see Rudnicki but they were too drunk to go. Unless you were at the Wrightwood Tap or Finley Dunne's yesterday, then we probably saw you but you were too cool to acknowledge me.
Click to expand...
Is that the place by Lou Malnati's? I think I've been there once. I miss the Burwood imo
 
'Bob Sacamano said:
'Guster said:
'General Malaise said:
'Guster said:
interesting development on the random make-out chick front... I was checking Facebook before going to bed on Tuesday night and saw that she had posted "I'm going to be a mom again" as her status update.

I did some quick math to see when the last time we had hooked up was and if there was any chance it could be mine. Technically if she had only missed one period and finally caught on when she was missing for a second time, then there was a very small chance. :unsure:

I woke up the next morning and she had deleted the post. Since then she has put up some cryptic messages about hating men, needing prayers, etc.

The fact that she hasn't contacted me is enough for me to confirm I'm in the clear, but that would be some seriously bad news!
Click to expand...
Hold up....you had sex with this woman recentlyish and now she is claiming - ON FACEBOOK - that she is going to be a mom and that she hates men. Remind me - is this the one who enjoyed sexual acts in front of transients? How'd that break-up go between you two? In the clear? Really? That's what we're going with on this holy St. Rufus of a Feces holiday?
Click to expand...
Yeah, that'd be the girl. There wasn't really a breakup, we just kinda stopped texting. I didn't want to push it and come across as being desperate.
Click to expand...
When I read things like this, I just want to reach out to each and every one of you who is dating in this day and age and punch you in the ear.
Click to expand...
Sorry I didn't fight hard to stay with a girl that really wants to get pregnantI'm not a big fan of talking on the phone and I think I had more than enough success considering I never once talked with this girl other than face-to-face

 
'Guster said:
'Bob Sacamano said:
'Guster said:
'General Malaise said:
'Guster said:
interesting development on the random make-out chick front... I was checking Facebook before going to bed on Tuesday night and saw that she had posted "I'm going to be a mom again" as her status update.

I did some quick math to see when the last time we had hooked up was and if there was any chance it could be mine. Technically if she had only missed one period and finally caught on when she was missing for a second time, then there was a very small chance. :unsure:

I woke up the next morning and she had deleted the post. Since then she has put up some cryptic messages about hating men, needing prayers, etc.

The fact that she hasn't contacted me is enough for me to confirm I'm in the clear, but that would be some seriously bad news!
Click to expand...
Hold up....you had sex with this woman recentlyish and now she is claiming - ON FACEBOOK - that she is going to be a mom and that she hates men. Remind me - is this the one who enjoyed sexual acts in front of transients? How'd that break-up go between you two? In the clear? Really? That's what we're going with on this holy St. Rufus of a Feces holiday?
Click to expand...
Yeah, that'd be the girl. There wasn't really a breakup, we just kinda stopped texting. I didn't want to push it and come across as being desperate.
Click to expand...
When I read things like this, I just want to reach out to each and every one of you who is dating in this day and age and punch you in the ear.
Click to expand...
Sorry I didn't fight hard to stay with a girl that really wants to get pregnantI'm not a big fan of talking on the phone and I think I had more than enough success considering I never once talked with this girl other than face-to-face
Click to expand...
I'm not sure how you took that as criticism, but I was really referring to the ease with which these things seem to begin and end. I mean, apart from people in the Pacific Northwest, I can't even tell that crazyish women exist in the Text era. You just delete someone from your Contacts and move on. It's glorious.
 
Last edited by a moderator:
'jplvr said:
I am running on fumes right now. I thought about posting before I left.. I even typed up a post before leaving, but thought I'd jinx things. Anyway, the weather here broke and the Gulf of Mexico was beautiful for the first time in a while. I spent at least 20 hours on the water on Friday and Saturday and couldn't be happier, eventhough we only caught one legal, keeper fish.We spent Friday afternoon trekking 45 miles offshore to find bluewater. It was just me and my best friend on his 23' boat, so we were testing our limits for sure, but the weather and water couldn't have been more perfect. We didn't have much to show for it, but considering we are total novices to the type of fishing we were attempting, we did ok. We caught a bontio about 5 minutes into things, but then hooked a wahoo a bit later. I saw it jump, but it landed sideways in the water and pulled the hook. It would've been a first for the two of us, but luck wasn't on our side. I'm pretty sure we saw 50 sea turtles, and I caught a glimpse of some whales which was great as I had never been out far enough to see something like that. On the way in, we found a spot loaded with the biggest red snapper I've ever caught. They whipped our butts, but we landed about 15 before calling it a day.We spent most of Saturday surrounded by fog trying to make it to one of our favorite spots, but stuck with it long enough for the fog to finally break at 2:45PM. We couldn't make it to our target, but changed plans and managed to boat some fish for dinner.After spending half the day cleaning the boat, I thought there was a decent chance I'd fall asleep driving home. As luck would have it, another friend called me an hour into the trip today. His boss just bought a 70' yacht (sportfisher) currently docked in Los Angeles. They were planning to ship it here on a cargo carrier, but have since decided to fish it around and through the Panama Canal. My friend was calling to inform me to be ready at a moment's notice to fly to places like Cabo, Costa Rica, and Panama to fish the boat around over the course of the Spring and Summer. All I have to do is buy a plane ticket to spend 10 days on that monster fishing some of the best fishing spots on the planet if I get the nod. I was jacked up for the rest of the drive home. It's going to be a rough day when I explain I'm taking 10 days off to go fishing in Panama (or 10 days in one of the other legs of the trip), but there's a good possibility that could happen a couple of times because of a Cabo or Costa Rica trip as well. I'll be going, regardless of consequences. Considering what they'll be doing on any of those trips, it's theoretically about a $20-30k trip for which I'll only be responsible for arriving on a plane.I'm on limitted sleep for the second straight weekend, but I'm having trouble getting to sleep tonight for totally different reasons.I'll post some pics tomorrow when I get the time. There's a shuke-est moment in one of the pics my buddy snapped. I'll try to dig up the comparable shuke moment I thought of when I first saw the pic.I think I've had about 12 hours of sleep since Wednesday.
Click to expand...
Sorry to hear about you having to fish all #@$*@$ weekend.T&P, GB
 
'Bob Sacamano said:
'Guster said:
'Bob Sacamano said:
'Guster said:
'General Malaise said:
'Guster said:
interesting development on the random make-out chick front... I was checking Facebook before going to bed on Tuesday night and saw that she had posted "I'm going to be a mom again" as her status update.

I did some quick math to see when the last time we had hooked up was and if there was any chance it could be mine. Technically if she had only missed one period and finally caught on when she was missing for a second time, then there was a very small chance. :unsure:

I woke up the next morning and she had deleted the post. Since then she has put up some cryptic messages about hating men, needing prayers, etc.

The fact that she hasn't contacted me is enough for me to confirm I'm in the clear, but that would be some seriously bad news!
Click to expand...
Hold up....you had sex with this woman recentlyish and now she is claiming - ON FACEBOOK - that she is going to be a mom and that she hates men. Remind me - is this the one who enjoyed sexual acts in front of transients? How'd that break-up go between you two? In the clear? Really? That's what we're going with on this holy St. Rufus of a Feces holiday?
Click to expand...
Yeah, that'd be the girl. There wasn't really a breakup, we just kinda stopped texting. I didn't want to push it and come across as being desperate.
Click to expand...
When I read things like this, I just want to reach out to each and every one of you who is dating in this day and age and punch you in the ear.
Click to expand...
Sorry I didn't fight hard to stay with a girl that really wants to get pregnantI'm not a big fan of talking on the phone and I think I had more than enough success considering I never once talked with this girl other than face-to-face
Click to expand...
I'm not sure how you took that as criticism, but I was really referring to the ease with which these things seem to begin and end. I mean, apart from people in the Pacific Northwest, I can't even tell that crazyish women exist in the Text era. You just delete someone from your Contacts and move on. It's glorious.
Click to expand...
:wall: gotcha. I'll blame it on lack of sleep
 
So Joe Bryant sends out an FF email today because Tebow is on the trading block and not because the Broncos got Manning?

OK.

Have a great rest of your Monday.

 
'urbanhack said:
So Joe Bryant sends out an FF email today because Tebow is on the trading block and not because the Broncos got Manning?OK.Have a great rest of your Monday.
Click to expand...
email I got mentions both. sounds like you need an upgrade.
 
Last edited by a moderator:
In the building I work in there are 7 public restrooms. 4 have three stalls each, the other 3 are single stall units. That adds up to 15 crappers to work with.

Yet I just spent 25 minutes wandering around from stall to stall because I couldn't find one clean or unoccupied. This is what happens when you work in a building frequented by thousands of 18 to 22 year old men each day. By noon the 3 main restrooms are a filthy mess. EVERY STALL.

I won't say this is the worst thing about my gig, but it's climbing the ####### list. :angry:

 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

General Malaise
GM's Thread About Everything/GM's Thread About Nothing
1856 1857 1858
Replies
93K
Views
3M
-fish-
-fish-
T
***Official 2014 GMTAN Draft Thread***
34 35 36
Replies
2K
Views
45K
El Floppo
El Floppo
Early_10
***Official*** Seinfeld draft thread
25 26 27
Replies
1K
Views
36K
The Dreaded Marco
The Dreaded Marco

Users who are viewing this thread

Total: 24 (members: 0, guests: 24)
Back
Top