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GM's thread about nothing (35 Viewers)
- Thread starter General Malaise
- Start date
Samuel L Bronkowitz
Footballguy
Idiot Boxer
Footballguy
I went with the Eye of Sauron'Sheriff Bart said:
mr. furley
Footballguy
come again?'General Malaise said:
Frostillicus
Footballguy
Yahoo email isn't working for me, but I know most of the people I send these to read in here so I'll try this.
YESTERDAY: 2-1, +0.13u
YTD: 623-323, +44.91u
Crawford (bos) NO Run -140
Johnson (tor) NO RBI -190
Headley (sd) NO RBI -130
Revere (min) YES Hit -260
Gordon (kc) NO RBI -150
Brantley (cle) NO RBI -180
Ackley (sea) NO RBI -180
Theriot (sf) NO RBI -180
Belt (sf) NO Run -170
YESTERDAY: 2-1, +0.13u
YTD: 623-323, +44.91u
Crawford (bos) NO Run -140
Johnson (tor) NO RBI -190
Headley (sd) NO RBI -130
Revere (min) YES Hit -260
Gordon (kc) NO RBI -150
Brantley (cle) NO RBI -180
Ackley (sea) NO RBI -180
Theriot (sf) NO RBI -180
Belt (sf) NO Run -170
Good Posting Judge
Footballguy
These look horrible. I'm taking the opposite side on each for 2u a piece.
King_Kelly
Footballguy
Brilliant, GM. Our take appeared to include more substantive analysis of the story than most daily updates.
kevzilla
Footballguy
DOMINATE YOUR THREAD
Mr. Pickles
Footballguy
It's the only sensible move, IMO.'Sheriff Bart said:
Mr. Pickles
Footballguy
'General Malaise said:
Sheriff Bart
Footballguy
Why do chicks dig scars?
kevzilla
Footballguy
Danger, you haz it.
Otis
Footballguy
My wife thinks she's pregnant again, very early. (She had a miscarriage a few months ago and had been in a baby craze ever since). This will be our second. She told me just before I left for the dentist this morning to get a chip in my tooth fixed. It turns out that not having dental insurance isn't the worst thing, because dental visits so far, which are very rare, cost like a hundred bucks. What a racket this dental insurance stuff is.
I came home and in an act of solidarity just polished off a full bottle of pinot grigio myself, which is a really crappy "Vampire Vineyards" wine that's left over from two mixed cases we bought off Woot not that long ago. Midway through the bottle I had to do a work call with a client in Tokyo. The good thing about that is I can slur my speech and nobody on that call really recognizes it. My wife now went to bed, I'm polishing off the last remnants of the bottle and watching Shark Week. I may try to get up early in the morning to go for a run before work, but then again I say that every night around this time, and I'm lucky if I do it once a week. That's why I'm 20lbs overweight and lazy as ever.
Salud FFA.
I came home and in an act of solidarity just polished off a full bottle of pinot grigio myself, which is a really crappy "Vampire Vineyards" wine that's left over from two mixed cases we bought off Woot not that long ago. Midway through the bottle I had to do a work call with a client in Tokyo. The good thing about that is I can slur my speech and nobody on that call really recognizes it. My wife now went to bed, I'm polishing off the last remnants of the bottle and watching Shark Week. I may try to get up early in the morning to go for a run before work, but then again I say that every night around this time, and I'm lucky if I do it once a week. That's why I'm 20lbs overweight and lazy as ever.
Salud FFA.
Mr. Pickles
Footballguy
Mine too. She is adamant about it.
Otis
Footballguy
If you stare at those tests long enough, it's pretty easy to imagine that second line.Congrats-ish GB. How old is your first now? I think we're on parallel paths here.
Bob Sacamano
Footballguy
We talking Irish twins here?
Otis
Footballguy
For Pickles, maybe. For Otis, we'd be clear. Over 2 years separation.
Mr. Pickles
Footballguy
He just turned one. Just had three shots and a hemoglobin test today. Good times at Casa de Pickles.
Otis
Footballguy
Ah yes. Shot days. Awesome.The first year is pretty boring. 12-16 months were a trip. When they start talking and getting personalities, it feels like an awesome new alias joining the FFA. Way more entertaining. GL
Sheriff Bart
Footballguy
Sheriff Bart
Footballguy
As I mentioned earlier, we had Meet the Teacher night last night. Turns out Dylan, 5 entering kindergarten, can add and subtract with stunning proficiency. I would love to take credit but it has been damage control for the last four years or so. His teacher was 
King_Kelly
Footballguy
As a father of two, I just want to thank God one more time for the guy that invented the vasectomy.
Sheriff Bart
Footballguy
King_Kelly
Footballguy
Yep. When I called to schedule the appointment, they said that I needed a consultation. I volunteered to drop JR off at the office for a couple hours as evidence that I shouldn't be making more kids. They went ahead and scheduled the appointment.Got mine right away after two.
Sheriff Bart
Footballguy
Yep. When I called to schedule the appointment, they said that I needed a consultation. I volunteered to drop JR off at the office for a couple hours as evidence that I shouldn't be making more kids. They went ahead and scheduled the appointment.
Of course my guy butchered me. Hurt like a mofo. Screamed like the torture it was. Good news, I didn't get a bill!
Samuel L Bronkowitz
Footballguy
Yep. When I called to schedule the appointment, they said that I needed a consultation. I volunteered to drop JR off at the office for a couple hours as evidence that I shouldn't be making more kids. They went ahead and scheduled the appointment.
I've got 3 weeks until Mrs Bronkowitz's due date. Starting to get a little nervous about all this.
Sheriff Bart
Footballguy
Some advice. Make sure she always gets up with the baby. Be a man here. The kids still want Mommy when they have a bad dream or something and I get to sleep.Yep. When I called to schedule the appointment, they said that I needed a consultation. I volunteered to drop JR off at the office for a couple hours as evidence that I shouldn't be making more kids. They went ahead and scheduled the appointment.
Marvin
Footballguy
So tonight the wife and I are going to dinner and we see a woman wearing a blouse similar to this but much tackier. (it's a blouse with a big-### tiger on it).
Wife: Damn, she sure does have a tiger on her shirt.
Me: Yep. That's one big ugly tiger blouse.
Wife: I wonder if she wore that to work today or put it on later.
Me: I'm not sure which would be worse.
Wife: Maybe she has a friend from the internet who has that same exact blouse and they both wear them and send pictures of themselves wearing the tiger shirt to each other.
Me:
Wife: We could have just driven by Tiger Blouse Kim.
Me:
Wife: Damn, she sure does have a tiger on her shirt.
Me: Yep. That's one big ugly tiger blouse.
Wife: I wonder if she wore that to work today or put it on later.
Me: I'm not sure which would be worse.
Wife: Maybe she has a friend from the internet who has that same exact blouse and they both wear them and send pictures of themselves wearing the tiger shirt to each other.
Me:
Wife: We could have just driven by Tiger Blouse Kim.
Me:
King_Kelly
Footballguy
So tonight the wife and I are going to dinner and we see a woman wearing a blouse similar to this but much tackier. (it's a blouse with a big-### tiger on it).
Wife: Damn, she sure does have a tiger on her shirt.
Me: Yep. That's one big ugly tiger blouse.
Wife: I wonder if she wore that to work today or put it on later.
Me: I'm not sure which would be worse.
Wife: Maybe she has a friend from the internet who has that same exact blouse and they both wear them and send pictures of themselves wearing the tiger shirt to each other.
Me:
Wife: We could have just driven by Tiger Blouse Kim.
Me:
Samuel L Bronkowitz
Footballguy
Some advice. Make sure she always gets up with the baby. Be a man here. The kids still want Mommy when they have a bad dream or something and I get to sleep.
So tonight the wife and I are going to dinner and we see a woman wearing a blouse similar to this but much tackier. (it's a blouse with a big-### tiger on it).
Wife: Damn, she sure does have a tiger on her shirt.
Me: Yep. That's one big ugly tiger blouse.
Wife: I wonder if she wore that to work today or put it on later.
Me: I'm not sure which would be worse.
Wife: Maybe she has a friend from the internet who has that same exact blouse and they both wear them and send pictures of themselves wearing the tiger shirt to each other.
Me:
Wife: We could have just driven by Tiger Blouse Kim.
Me:
shuke
Black Ice Skeptic
So tonight the wife and I are going to dinner and we see a woman wearing a blouse similar to this but much tackier. (it's a blouse with a big-### tiger on it).
Wife: Damn, she sure does have a tiger on her shirt.
Me: Yep. That's one big ugly tiger blouse.
Wife: I wonder if she wore that to work today or put it on later.
Me: I'm not sure which would be worse.
Wife: Maybe she has a friend from the internet who has that same exact blouse and they both wear them and send pictures of themselves wearing the tiger shirt to each other.
Me:
Wife: We could have just driven by Tiger Blouse Kim.
Me:
-fish-
Footballguy
So tonight the wife and I are going to dinner and we see a woman wearing a blouse similar to this but much tackier. (it's a blouse with a big-### tiger on it).
Wife: Damn, she sure does have a tiger on her shirt.
Me: Yep. That's one big ugly tiger blouse.
Wife: I wonder if she wore that to work today or put it on later.
Me: I'm not sure which would be worse.
Wife: Maybe she has a friend from the internet who has that same exact blouse and they both wear them and send pictures of themselves wearing the tiger shirt to each other.
Me:
Wife: We could have just driven by Tiger Blouse Kim.
Me:
Mr. Pickles
Footballguy
Welcome, Tiger Blouse Kim.
Sheriff Bart
Footballguy
HFS *100
*100
Stoneys
MudCat
And Tiger Shirt Kim just made SLB's list.
UOFI_316
Footballguy
'General Malaise said:
Be honest, how much more time did you put into that then your actual work??
Congrats.
It is all your wife in the beginning. All you need to do is sit on the couch and film shot videos.
So tonight the wife and I are going to dinner and we see a woman wearing a blouse similar to this but much tackier. (it's a blouse with a big-### tiger on it).
Wife: Damn, she sure does have a tiger on her shirt.
Me: Yep. That's one big ugly tiger blouse.
Wife: I wonder if she wore that to work today or put it on later.
Me: I'm not sure which would be worse.
Wife: Maybe she has a friend from the internet who has that same exact blouse and they both wear them and send pictures of themselves wearing the tiger shirt to each other.
Me:
Wife: We could have just driven by Tiger Blouse Kim.
Me:
Leeroy Jenkins
Footballguy
How old were the Olsen twins in 2004? This will determine how I rank new York minute.
Bogart
Footballguy
For those not in the iDating thread:
Saturday night/Sunday morning:
Monday: Sensitive texts from her on how much space do I need
Tuesday: The email how she has fallen for me, my response how neither of us were looking for a bf/gf, the texting breakup, the email rebuttal from her apologizing about the rude way she ended it on the text
Wednesday morning: the drunk 2am email from her apologizing/letting me go/mentioning her Sugar Daddy who is 55 and will take her away/reminding me she is there if I need more
Things I have learned:
1. Man, dating moves fast here in the 2000s
2. What is it about me finding women who also have old guys (sorry Tanner) after them? At least I know in 20 years I can get then what I am getting now.
3. I love that this entire exchange happened without a single spoken word. Thank you Al Gore for the interwebz.
Saturday night/Sunday morning:
Monday: Sensitive texts from her on how much space do I need
Tuesday: The email how she has fallen for me, my response how neither of us were looking for a bf/gf, the texting breakup, the email rebuttal from her apologizing about the rude way she ended it on the text
Wednesday morning: the drunk 2am email from her apologizing/letting me go/mentioning her Sugar Daddy who is 55 and will take her away/reminding me she is there if I need more
Things I have learned:
1. Man, dating moves fast here in the 2000s
2. What is it about me finding women who also have old guys (sorry Tanner) after them? At least I know in 20 years I can get then what I am getting now.
3. I love that this entire exchange happened without a single spoken word. Thank you Al Gore for the interwebz.
Disco Stu
Confirmed FBGal
cosjobs
Footballguy
I will be working from home all morning, so I'd appreciate if you guys would wake up and humor me in here.
Stu (or any other GMTANers)- The next three weeks (except this weekend), I'll provide accommodations for less than half price for anyone who wants to come check the place out and help me ensure were are ready for full priced customers. I will provide private room/bath for two, airport pickup, daily transportation to one event per day (i.e., take you to sixth st. or where ever and pick up up at the end of your revelry), full breakfast and one other meal or box lunch. Early or late happy hour with lots of wine alos provided daily GMTAN rate $100/nite for two, two night min. This package will be $250-500/night during ACL.
I hope I am not offending anyone's sensibilities here by pimping this here.
Stu (or any other GMTANers)- The next three weeks (except this weekend), I'll provide accommodations for less than half price for anyone who wants to come check the place out and help me ensure were are ready for full priced customers. I will provide private room/bath for two, airport pickup, daily transportation to one event per day (i.e., take you to sixth st. or where ever and pick up up at the end of your revelry), full breakfast and one other meal or box lunch. Early or late happy hour with lots of wine alos provided daily GMTAN rate $100/nite for two, two night min. This package will be $250-500/night during ACL.
I hope I am not offending anyone's sensibilities here by pimping this here.
Last edited by a moderator:
Disco Stu
Confirmed FBGal
Dang, too bad I have to go to Kansas City for Labor Day weekend. The weekend before that might work though. I'll see what I can do.
Disco Stu
Confirmed FBGal
Stu - Pleasure seeing you again this weekend. I was pretty out of it, but I think it was mostly tame. Hopefully next time we'll have the opportunity to do shots and other stupid things. 
Cos - I'm just a GMTAN lurker but if you have available rooms during ACL and/or FFFFest I may be interested. Haven't figured out where I'll be staying during these events yet.
Cos - I'm just a GMTAN lurker but if you have available rooms during ACL and/or FFFFest I may be interested. Haven't figured out where I'll be staying during these events yet.
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