GM's thread about nothing (41 Viewers)

[proninja]

Life lesson: never try to move to Nicaragua with a sick cat.

Our young fuzzy cat who has been in kidney failure since February can't get a rabies shot due to a compromised immune system. Try figuring out whether you can get him into Nicaragua without it. Go ahead, try. One consulate doesn't answer the phone; one speaks only Spanish; one says he's not legally authorized to do anything. I think we're down to convincing our vet to lie, or forging paperwork on our own.

On the much-needed good news side, his latest bloodwork shows great improvement after weeks of our giving him fluids and medication every day.

This prompted me to sit down and have a long talk with my cat today to manage his expectations.

eta - he said he has shots and is willing to move to nica with you.

I'm in for the cat, the Stoner Poodles, and the little dog that jumps straight up in the air.

What about the chickens?

I will take the live chickens, not the dead ones.

My wife wants to keep a couple chickens for the eggs. How hard is it to keep the little buggers alive with the cats and raccoons we have around here?

http://www.nbcnews.com/health/backyard-chickens-dumped-shelters-when-hipsters-cant-cope-critics-say-6C10533508

Seriously, it's a silly thing that several people I know are doing. If you'd like me to put you guys in touch with them, I will (they are good-hearted folks that are just doing a dumb thing).

Good crud, are people dumb. There's seriously a shelter for abandoned chickens? That isn't KFC?

 

[cosjobs]

My wife wants to keep a couple chickens for the eggs. How hard is it to keep the little buggers alive with the cats and raccoons we have around here?

wat

Show her this.

We're a little hippie-ish with our diet and only eat eggs from pastured hens. But yes, my argument has been that paying $5/dozen is better than having chickens.

I hear ya. I only eat eggs from prairie chickens.

I'm surprised to say that having a couple of dozen hens around is pretty cool. THey all come running up whenever I show up in the backyard and they are a positive thing overall. Plus, I have not lost one since the ill-fated transport of 03/13. We get about 15 eggs a day and once the heat breaks i bet we get 20+. I am much more fond of the whole operation than I would have ever imagined. We have foxes, coons, possums and a rat terrier that would all love to eat them, but we have staved them off with baling wire and strategically placed and wired oven grates.

 

[Good Posting Judge]

Please keep the racism to a minimum, Cos.

 

[Homer J Simpson]

I'd like to deposition Depp for his disgusting Lone Ranger decision.

You didn't go see that, did you? Please tell me no...

No, of course not. My buddy says he saw an early release of it, but I'm 80% sure it's a fishing trip so I just keep responding with "nope" when he brings it up.

Might be time to fire up the "Rave about obviously ####ty movies that I haven't seen" shtick on facebook.

 

[Guster]

Just got back from my date. One thing you really can't tell about a girl from her pictures and bio is if she's deaf.

Ok, so she was only ~50% deaf in both ears, but she talked like a deaf person. At one point she asked me why I hadn't asked about her speech and I may have replied "because I don't really care." I guess I was the first guy she's been out with in a long time that didn't ask nice enough girl, but don't think I'll be seeing her again.

I was pretty tired last night after a rather eventful day, so forgot to mention that this girl did have some pretty epic stories:1. She used to shave her head bald

B. She was in the Peace Corp... in NICARAGUA!! (K4 )

III, The place she was staying there didn't have electricity and had an outhouse for a toilet (Peens, ). One night about a month in, she woke up with a terrible pain and feeling she was going to #### herself. She sprinted to the outhouse (Peens, ), threw open the door pulled down her pants and before she could sit on the hole for a seat, projectile massive diarrhea-ed like a hippo spraying poop with its tail. It got all over the tarp walls on the outhouse (Peens, ) and she had to walk to the center of the village 5 times to get buckets of water to clean it off by the glistening moonlight.

for > A tale about sitting around a table with Peace Corp friends when one of them has stomach issues and throws up so hard that they pooped their pants while the rest of them laugh at her and keep drinking

V - Getting parasites and having worms that you have to pull out of your ###

Some great stories for her to share on a first date. I was amused, but just didn't feel a connection.

 

[kevzilla]

You didn't have a connection with the bald projectile pooper with worms? You should be more open-minded.

 

[Annyong]

@Peens

 

[Guster]

You didn't have a connection with the bald projectile pooper with worms? You should be more open-minded.

She has hair now, not sure about the rest though

 

[heckmanm]

Just got back from my date. One thing you really can't tell about a girl from her pictures and bio is if she's deaf.

Ok, so she was only ~50% deaf in both ears, but she talked like a deaf person. At one point she asked me why I hadn't asked about her speech and I may have replied "because I don't really care." I guess I was the first guy she's been out with in a long time that didn't ask nice enough girl, but don't think I'll be seeing her again.

Shtick response:

"I DID!"

 

[Guster]

Just got back from my date. One thing you really can't tell about a girl from her pictures and bio is if she's deaf.

Ok, so she was only ~50% deaf in both ears, but she talked like a deaf person. At one point she asked me why I hadn't asked about her speech and I may have replied "because I don't really care." I guess I was the first guy she's been out with in a long time that didn't ask nice enough girl, but don't think I'll be seeing her again.

Shtick response: "I DID!"

The interesting thing was that she had no problems hearing me. At one point we moved from the outside patio inside because it was hot and the Mosquitos were biting me. We sat next to each other at the table, but then she angled her chair away from me a big. I wasn't paying close enough attention to see if she was trying to lip read to offset the hearing loss.

One thing about her accent is she mentioned that on one date she's was on, the guy asked if she was German or something. Smooth, guy. The speech part caught me off guard, but wasn't a deal breaker. I dig a chick with an accent this was more of an issue of not feeling any chemistry (and wondering if she had recently pulled any worms out of her ###)

 

[Abraham]

http://www.cnn.com/2013/07/10/us/tennessee-nude-neighbor/index.html?c=us&page=1

 

[SofaKings]

Fuller?

http://www.cnn.com/2013/07/10/us/tennessee-nude-neighbor/index.html?c=us&page=1

Fuller has a good gig going.

 

[DocGonzo]

My wife wants to keep a couple chickens for the eggs. How hard is it to keep the little buggers alive with the cats and raccoons we have around here?

ex future ex mrs fish has four chickens. used to have five, but her daughter let one out and it ran away to become coyote food.

they're actually pretty low maintenance, and they'll eat any scraps plus the organic chicken feed (yeah, she's one of those). she's compared the cost of the food to the benefit of the eggs, and says it's a wash. she gets 2-3 eggs a day from them...but they stopped laying when the days got short, and she had to buy a light and a timer.

pretty simple to keep as long as you don't put a mattress on them.

Yeah, it's a big 'thing' here in Portland. My buddy built a coop and has a few of them now. We went over there and part of the entertainment was bringing out one chicken they called "Lightning", letting him go and then timing the kids to see who could catch him (her?) the fastest. I'm guessing this is what we did before TV and sex.

I know a guy who used to have some chickens. When he'd have parties he'd put one in a big cage that had a grid on the floor. Each square of the grid was a different playing card. We would all buy a card or two, depending on how many people were in. At some point the chicken would drop a deuce and the pot went to the person with the corresponding card. We called it chicken#### poker. We're degenerates.

 

[Disco Stu]

You didn't have a connection with the bald projectile pooper with worms? You should be more open-minded.

Seriously. If she shared all that on the first date she's clearly very comfortable with things some may find disgusting. :dentist:

Only danger there is she might not hear your safe word.

 

[T Bell]

What's the verdict on wearing baseball jerseys? I've always been anti-jersey, especially football, especially with a name on the back. But what about this? No name or number on the back. I've been wanting one and went ahead and got one. Will I regret this?

Serious question. If I keep it, what do I do with that big patch near the bottom? Can I remove that?

You planning on tucking that thing in, captain?

Of course not.

Good, so you won't turn into one of these guys then.

 

[shuke]

What's the verdict on wearing baseball jerseys? I've always been anti-jersey, especially football, especially with a name on the back. But what about this? No name or number on the back. I've been wanting one and went ahead and got one. Will I regret this?

Serious question. If I keep it, what do I do with that big patch near the bottom? Can I remove that?

Not a huge fan of MLB jerseys as street-wear (and not at an actual game). Just my taste. Now if it was something interesting like a Japanese league team or something I can see it.

Also that thing is whiter than GM's upper thighs. Pretty much just a stain magnet.

I'd only be wearing it to games.

 

[mr roboto]

You didn't have a connection with the bald projectile pooper with worms? You should be more open-minded.

Seriously. If she shared all that on the first date she's clearly very comfortable with things some may find disgusting. :dentist:Only danger there is she might not hear your safe word.

We're going straight to hell.

 

[shuke]

pretty simple to keep as long as you don't put a mattress on them.

 

[Abraham]

Wearing it to the games is fine. And weddings.

As a note, did anyone else see the story of the Browns fan that died? The Browns sent a custom jersey to his family and (IIRC) some players went to serve as pallbearers. The guy had it in his will that he wanted some of the players to serve as pallbearers "...so the Browns will have the opportunity to let me down one more time."

 

[T Bell]

http://www.nbcnews.com/health/backyard-chickens-dumped-shelters-when-hipsters-cant-cope-critics-say-6C10533508Seriously, it's a silly thing that several people I know are doing. If you'd like me to put you guys in touch with them, I will (they are good-hearted folks that are just doing a dumb thing).

Good crud, are people dumb. There's seriously a shelter for abandoned chickens? That isn't KFC?

A shelter for abandoned chickens. Isn't that called a coop?

 

[Disco Stu]

What's the verdict on wearing baseball jerseys? I've always been anti-jersey, especially football, especially with a name on the back. But what about this? No name or number on the back. I've been wanting one and went ahead and got one. Will I regret this?

Serious question. If I keep it, what do I do with that big patch near the bottom? Can I remove that?

Not a huge fan of MLB jerseys as street-wear (and not at an actual game). Just my taste. Now if it was something interesting like a Japanese league team or something I can see it.

Also that thing is whiter than GM's upper thighs. Pretty much just a stain magnet.

I'd only be wearing it to games.

I don't own one (I rent) but MLB jerseys are much better than NFL jerseys. Totally fine at the game imo. Not that bad even at a sports bar... especially if it's the playoffs.

Side note: soccer jerseys aren't bad either.

 

[T Bell]

Just got back from my date. One thing you really can't tell about a girl from her pictures and bio is if she's deaf.

Ok, so she was only ~50% deaf in both ears, but she talked like a deaf person. At one point she asked me why I hadn't asked about her speech and I may have replied "because I don't really care." I guess I was the first guy she's been out with in a long time that didn't ask nice enough girl, but don't think I'll be seeing her again.

I was pretty tired last night after a rather eventful day, so forgot to mention that this girl did have some pretty epic stories:1. She used to shave her head bald

B. She was in the Peace Corp... in NICARAGUA!! (K4 )

III, The place she was staying there didn't have electricity and had an outhouse for a toilet (Peens, ). One night about a month in, she woke up with a terrible pain and feeling she was going to #### herself. She sprinted to the outhouse (Peens, ), threw open the door pulled down her pants and before she could sit on the hole for a seat, projectile massive diarrhea-ed like a hippo spraying poop with its tail. It got all over the tarp walls on the outhouse (Peens, ) and she had to walk to the center of the village 5 times to get buckets of water to clean it off by the glistening moonlight.

for > A tale about sitting around a table with Peace Corp friends when one of them has stomach issues and throws up so hard that they pooped their pants while the rest of them laugh at her and keep drinking

V - Getting parasites and having worms that you have to pull out of your ###

Some great stories for her to share on a first date. I was amused, but just didn't feel a connection.

A girl who shares that kind of stuff on a first date that I gather she likes is trying really hard to be cool to cover up for sounding like Helen Keller.

You're such a jerk. I'll bet she went home and cried herself to sleep in her pillow.

 

[T Bell]

pretty simple to keep as long as you don't put a mattress on them.

 

[T Bell]

Wearing it to the games is fine. And weddings.

As a note, did anyone else see the story of the Browns fan that died? The Browns sent a custom jersey to his family and (IIRC) some players went to serve as pallbearers. The guy had it in his will that he wanted some of the players to serve as pallbearers "...so the Browns will have the opportunity to let me down one more time."

Awesome.

 

[Bob Sacamano]

"I watched her swim naked for 20 minutes and then invited her to church" is good shtick.

"I watched her pull worms out of her ###. When it was empty, I filled it with my own. Then I invited her to church."

 

[Ignoramus]

I'm in the "wear a jersey if you want to wear a jersey" camp. Just don't tuck it in.

Oh, at that "full kit" twitter. Wow.

 

[T Bell]

I dunno, wouldn't you want to hear what deaf girl sex sounds like? I mean you're chuckling now, but maybe she does sex noises better than anyone.

 

[Idiot Boxer]

I dunno, wouldn't you want to hear what deaf girl sex sounds like? I mean you're chuckling now, but maybe she does sex noises better than anyone.

Now I must know.

 

[Annyong]

Guster has "trusting" eyes. I would tell him all my poop stories on our first date.

 

[Bob Sacamano]

I dunno, wouldn't you want to hear what deaf girl sex sounds like? I mean you're chuckling now, but maybe she does sex noises better than anyone.

Now I must know.

I'd guess it's like sex with most women, but what's the worst that could happen?

 

[T Bell]

I dunno, wouldn't you want to hear what deaf girl sex sounds like? I mean you're chuckling now, but maybe she does sex noises better than anyone.

Now I must know.

I'd guess it's like sex with most women, but what's the worst that could happen?

Now you've got me wondering how she pronounced "worms".

 

[Idiot Boxer]

I dunno, wouldn't you want to hear what deaf girl sex sounds like? I mean you're chuckling now, but maybe she does sex noises better than anyone.

Now I must know.

I'd guess it's like sex with most women, but what's the worst that could happen?

NICE.

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY COS!

May you eat all of the perfect health cakes.

 

[Abraham]

How's this for a win: Called Sirius XM to cancel my subscription. I noticed this morning that they debited my account $56 (three months) and that's money I need for things other than a radio in my car. Guy offered a few things (like paying for two months and getting the rest free until December). Told him I appreciated the gesture but I really needed to get the full $56 back. So he credited the $56 and gave me two months free. I just have to call before September 10 to either cancel or stay activated.

 

[cosjobs]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY COS!

May you eat all of the perfect health cakes.

I really hate personal info on the internets, so the FB birthdate is a hoax. I went ahead and corrected it yesterday after a bunch of errant well wishes, but it still shows the incorrect date. It is the 22nd of this month, same as Foos.

 

[Abraham]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY COS!

May you eat all of the perfect health cakes.

I really hate personal info on the internets, so the FB birthdate is a hoax. I went ahead and corrected it yesterday after a bunch of errant well wishes, but it still shows the incorrect date. It is the 22nd of this month, same as Foos.

You should just update it to show whatever tomorrow is, every day.

 

[phishphan]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY COS!

May you eat all of the perfect health cakes.

I really hate personal info on the internets, so the FB birthdate is a hoax. I went ahead and corrected it yesterday after a bunch of errant well wishes, but it still shows the incorrect date. It is the 22nd of this month, same as Foos.

I was going to ask about this. FB is telling me to wish you happy birthday, but when I went to your page it said the 22nd.

so read the following on the 22nd I guess..

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

 

[phishphan]

Fuller?

http://www.cnn.com/2013/07/10/us/tennessee-nude-neighbor/index.html?c=us&page=1

Fuller has a good gig going.

shhhhhhhhh!

 

[Ignoramus]

Happy Birthday Cos and Foos!

 

[Disco Stu]

Hit or miss, but 15 is gold. #tanner

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY COS!

May you eat all of the perfect health cakes.

I really hate personal info on the internets, so the FB birthdate is a hoax. I went ahead and corrected it yesterday after a bunch of errant well wishes, but it still shows the incorrect date. It is the 22nd of this month, same as Foos.

Well that's confusing.

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

How's this for a win: Called Sirius XM to cancel my subscription. I noticed this morning that they debited my account $56 (three months) and that's money I need for things other than a radio in my car. Guy offered a few things (like paying for two months and getting the rest free until December). Told him I appreciated the gesture but I really needed to get the full $56 back. So he credited the $56 and gave me two months free. I just have to call before September 10 to either cancel or stay activated.

I have a free six months with my new truck. Looking online it looks like you can haggle for a year for $60 or get 5 mumfs for $25. I'm not sure how much I need it with spotify/pandora/mlbapp already in tow, but if it's $60 for a year I might do it.

 

[Guster]

Guster has "trusting" eyes. I would tell him all my poop stories on our first date.

this level of divulging isn't uncommon, just awesome

 

[Annyong]

i just sprayed like 50 bees with Windex

 

[Annyong]

Guster has "trusting" eyes. I would tell him all my poop stories on our first date.

this level of divulging isn't uncommon, just awesome

When I was 10 or so, I pooped in my swimming trunks right before the boat started. I had to fish it out of the meshing lining when i was done water skiing.

 

[Annyong]

I also pooped in my boxers at my brothers dorm at the Uninversity of Iowa at like 4am because I was too wasted to find the bathroom down the hall. I ended up taking them off and sending them down to the lobby in the elevator.

 

[Ignoramus]

How's this for a win: Called Sirius XM to cancel my subscription. I noticed this morning that they debited my account $56 (three months) and that's money I need for things other than a radio in my car. Guy offered a few things (like paying for two months and getting the rest free until December). Told him I appreciated the gesture but I really needed to get the full $56 back. So he credited the $56 and gave me two months free. I just have to call before September 10 to either cancel or stay activated.

I bought my car two years ago and Sirius still has not sent me a bill nor disconnected me.

 

[Bob Sacamano]

How's this for a win: Called Sirius XM to cancel my subscription. I noticed this morning that they debited my account $56 (three months) and that's money I need for things other than a radio in my car. Guy offered a few things (like paying for two months and getting the rest free until December). Told him I appreciated the gesture but I really needed to get the full $56 back. So he credited the $56 and gave me two months free. I just have to call before September 10 to either cancel or stay activated.

I have a free six months with my new truck. Looking online it looks like you can haggle for a year for $60 or get 5 mumfs for $25. I'm not sure how much I need it with spotify/pandora/mlbapp already in tow, but if it's $60 for a year I might do it.

I think I ended up at $70 for 13 months. I have no idea how much lower you could get them, but I'm sure it's less than that. I didn't press very hard. The longer you subscribe the lower the annual fee they're willing to give. I've been wondering myself whether I'd be better off just using Spotify and killing the XM. I do like the sports options, though.

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

How's this for a win: Called Sirius XM to cancel my subscription. I noticed this morning that they debited my account $56 (three months) and that's money I need for things other than a radio in my car. Guy offered a few things (like paying for two months and getting the rest free until December). Told him I appreciated the gesture but I really needed to get the full $56 back. So he credited the $56 and gave me two months free. I just have to call before September 10 to either cancel or stay activated.

I bought my car two years ago and Sirius still has not sent me a bill nor disconnected me.

Good info here.

 

[Aaron Rudnicki]

I also pooped in my boxers at my brothers dorm at the Uninversity of Iowa at like 4am because I was too wasted to find the bathroom down the hall. I ended up taking them off and sending them down to the lobby in the elevator.

I'm certain you posted this story in this thread before.