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GM's thread about nothing (41 Viewers)
- Thread starter General Malaise
- Start date
Henry Ford
Footballguy
Binky The Doormat
Footballguy
Translation: 12 concurrent life sentences.Bored Stormtrooper will regain access on Sep 24, 2081 at 03:30 PMYup, status quo with redman. I can log in and report posts, but can't post myself. What's with me being left out of the current era of amnesty?
It just occurred to me that I think redman's been banned longer than he's been able to post in the FBG's forums. Actually, actually true.
General Malaise
Footballguy
Jesus F. Christ...
/Thanks Posty
Bob Sacamano
Footballguy
Notorious T.R.E.
Showdown!™ Administrator
Dan Lambskin
Footballguy
BobbyLayne
Footballguy
We had a myna bird growing up.
We were the worst family pet people back in the late 60s/early 70s.
OUTSIDE DOG - he's a Saint Bernard, he loves the snow
DECLAWED CAT - she shredded the curtains
GILDFISH DYING EVERY SIX MONTHS - that's actually normal, but you see the clear pattern
Anyway, we were so lazy. Nobody wanted to sit around talking to a bird. So we bought an LP that had 20 minutes of repetitive phrases. Setup one of those mono turntables and left it on repeat. We'd play that record non-stop while we were out playing or whatever.
F'n bird never learned a word. Then oldest sister had her first serous boyfriend. Guy was awesome - drove a Jeep, captain/MLB on the football team, dude was always cracking jokes and telling stories. 12 year old BL thought Frank was the greatest. Well, Frank like to talk to the bird. Within a few weeks , every time someone walked in the living room that bird would sing:
YOU SUCK MOTHER####ER
YOU SUCK MOTHER####ER
Mom was not amused.
We were the worst family pet people back in the late 60s/early 70s.
OUTSIDE DOG - he's a Saint Bernard, he loves the snow
DECLAWED CAT - she shredded the curtains
GILDFISH DYING EVERY SIX MONTHS - that's actually normal, but you see the clear pattern
Anyway, we were so lazy. Nobody wanted to sit around talking to a bird. So we bought an LP that had 20 minutes of repetitive phrases. Setup one of those mono turntables and left it on repeat. We'd play that record non-stop while we were out playing or whatever.
F'n bird never learned a word. Then oldest sister had her first serous boyfriend. Guy was awesome - drove a Jeep, captain/MLB on the football team, dude was always cracking jokes and telling stories. 12 year old BL thought Frank was the greatest. Well, Frank like to talk to the bird. Within a few weeks , every time someone walked in the living room that bird would sing:
YOU SUCK MOTHER####ER
YOU SUCK MOTHER####ER
Mom was not amused.
Notorious T.R.E.
Showdown!™ Administrator
We have glofish for my son. I've actually done a decent job keeping them alive. So much so that I might upgrade the tank from this crappy starter one I got.
Disco Stu
Confirmed FBGal
Guster
Footballguy
Went to a happy hour with the girl last night that featured unlimited free drinks
After some significant consumption, we moved to the casino where I somehow managed to come out up $30 or so
The gf worked from home today, so we stayed in bed til ~9:30 before I finally got ready and stumbled into work
Went back to her house for "lunch" that lasted over two hours, back to work for about a half hour before deciding to return to her place for the rest of the afternoon.
tl;dr today was a good day
After some significant consumption, we moved to the casino where I somehow managed to come out up $30 or so
The gf worked from home today, so we stayed in bed til ~9:30 before I finally got ready and stumbled into work
Went back to her house for "lunch" that lasted over two hours, back to work for about a half hour before deciding to return to her place for the rest of the afternoon.
tl;dr today was a good day
the rover
Footballguy
Bob Sacamano
Footballguy
jplvr
Footballguy
What if I called it a Bobcat?Otherwise, I often try to do things I did not originally intend.
cosjobs
Footballguy
the rover
Footballguy
Josie Maran
Footballguy
T Bell
Footballguy
T Bell
Footballguy
T Bell
Footballguy
-fish-
Footballguy
BobbyLayne
Footballguy
He did, man. He was an heir to the Gibson refrigeration family. I think some people, knowing they're set for life if they don't totally screw up, just kinda go through life with a little less care. He was one of my first real life heroes. Taught me how to throw a curve ball, how to take a bong hit, and how to blame a fart on the dog.
His mom, Bunny - actual name - insisted they go to different universities. Predictably they broke up. He graduated MSU in 1978 and Gibson Refrigeration put him in a junior executive program. Four months after college he was killed in a car crash. I have no doubt he was in his way to being a great man.
His twin sisters - my age - both live on Long Island now, married with families, and I have drinks with them once or twice a year. We always tell lots of Frank stories. Forever young.
ETA: with a little liquor in the mix we tell Frank stories in my family as well. Even at a young age he was larger than life kind of guy.
His twin sisters - my age - both live on Long Island now, married with families, and I have drinks with them once or twice a year. We always tell lots of Frank stories. Forever young.
ETA: with a little liquor in the mix we tell Frank stories in my family as well. Even at a young age he was larger than life kind of guy.
Last edited by a moderator:
Limp Ditka
Footballguy
cosjobs
Footballguy
Josie Maran
Footballguy
Frostillicus
Footballguy
We won soccer tonight 2-1 to move to 1-2 on the season. Found a new secret weapon - the fat kid. He's slow and deliberate, but he's coordinated and once he gets moving he's really good at using his body to keep all the other kids away from the ball. Between him and the 2 chinesed kids with my son setting picks we're on to something. I just need to get the weepy girl and the spazzy kid to quit somehow.
belljr
Footballguy
I got one for you. I'm running a hitting clinic yesterday for 3rd and 4th graders. Doing hitting drills. Girl keeps holding the bat weird. I fix it. She steps up to the tee starts ripping the ball.
we then do a scrimmage. One of the other guys is pitching she's comes up, I'm standing by the plate to help. The other coach goes. Be ready first lefty is up.
My jaw hits the ground? You're a lefty? Why didn't you tell me? I told her how well she did as a right
we then do a scrimmage. One of the other guys is pitching she's comes up, I'm standing by the plate to help. The other coach goes. Be ready first lefty is up.
My jaw hits the ground? You're a lefty? Why didn't you tell me? I told her how well she did as a right
T Bell
Footballguy
I coached my younger brother's soccer team when I was in high school. I was 17 years old and playing in high school, and the kids were all 10 and 11. (In hindsight I have no idea how they let me do this, but that's what I did. We kicked some ### too.)
Before the season starts, I'm making the calls to all of the parents to introduce myself and to get things organized, practice schedule and location, etc. I call one kid's mom and a lady with a nice, chipper English accent answers and I have the standard discussion. All's going well and she's ever so enthusiastic about her son, Matthew, playing.
Towards the end of the conversation, seemingly as an afterthought, she asks me about whether I know about her son's "prossy". I'm like
, but she's English and it sounds like it's the name for something that's English and I don't want to make her feel awkward as a foreigner and maybe I'll figure out what it means contextually, so I say, "No, I wasn't aware." "Oh", she says, "Well, Matthew has a prossy but he still very much likes to play and wants to participate with all of the other boys out there. He doesn't expect to be treated any differently than the other boys."
At this point I simply have to ask because now it sounds like it's important and I need to know what she's talking about, so I apologetically confess to her that I don't really know what a "prossy" is. "Oh, it's a prosthetic." The 17-year old me didn't have any more idea what a prosthetic was than what a "prossy" was, so I ask again and she says, "He wears an artificial leg."
So yeah, I coached a kid on my brother's soccer team who wore an artificial (below-the-knee) leg.
Before the season starts, I'm making the calls to all of the parents to introduce myself and to get things organized, practice schedule and location, etc. I call one kid's mom and a lady with a nice, chipper English accent answers and I have the standard discussion. All's going well and she's ever so enthusiastic about her son, Matthew, playing.
Towards the end of the conversation, seemingly as an afterthought, she asks me about whether I know about her son's "prossy". I'm like
, but she's English and it sounds like it's the name for something that's English and I don't want to make her feel awkward as a foreigner and maybe I'll figure out what it means contextually, so I say, "No, I wasn't aware." "Oh", she says, "Well, Matthew has a prossy but he still very much likes to play and wants to participate with all of the other boys out there. He doesn't expect to be treated any differently than the other boys."At this point I simply have to ask because now it sounds like it's important and I need to know what she's talking about, so I apologetically confess to her that I don't really know what a "prossy" is. "Oh, it's a prosthetic." The 17-year old me didn't have any more idea what a prosthetic was than what a "prossy" was, so I ask again and she says, "He wears an artificial leg."
So yeah, I coached a kid on my brother's soccer team who wore an artificial (below-the-knee) leg.
Great kid as it turned out. Couldn't move around for ####, but he won every challenge - you don't worry about sticking you foot into a challenge when you can unbuckle it when the game's over. Kids on other teams started being afraid of him.
He also had a great attitude about his leg and it became a point of pride for my team. After practice one day they and Matthew convinced me to throw the leg through the door into the middle of this after school girl's dance class, which resulted in screams.
He also had a great attitude about his leg and it became a point of pride for my team. After practice one day they and Matthew convinced me to throw the leg through the door into the middle of this after school girl's dance class, which resulted in screams.
shuke
Black Ice Skeptic
shuke
Black Ice Skeptic
Frostillicus
Footballguy
####
be quiet please
be quiet please
Frostillicus
Footballguy
Story checks out.
shuke
Black Ice Skeptic
shuke
Black Ice Skeptic
shuke
Black Ice Skeptic
T Bell
Footballguy
I just input that on my Google calendar.Bored Stormtrooper will regain access on Sep 24, 2081 at 03:30 PMYup, status quo with redman. I can log in and report posts, but can't post myself. What's with me being left out of the current era of amnesty?
It just occurred to me that I think redman's been banned longer than he's been able to post in the FBG's forums. Actually, actually true.
Hopefully that'll confuse the hell out of the executor of my estate in 67 years...
T Bell
Footballguy
Don't have my son tonight. Not seeing anyone currently. I was playing computer games while I procrastinated doing some legal work for clients and realized belatedly that I was hungry, so I went up to the local grocery store and bought a 8-piece (whole) fried (not baked) chicken (made fresh, on site), a chilled bottle of gewurztraminer, and some watermelon-flavored Sour Patch Kids for dessert. I've eaten a fried breast and two fried thighs, I just poured the last of the wine into a plastic cup, and I'm currently eyeing the SPK's.
Slap it high?
Slap it high?
charvik
Footballguy
I like the way you think.
Officer Pete Malloy
Footballguy
joffer
Footballguy
That was awesome
T Bell
Footballguy
krista4
Footballguy
Notorious T.R.E.
Showdown!™ Administrator
Also drunk. Hi.
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