Had DHS called on me (1 Viewer)

[ROCKET]

Well at least now if the kid turns out to be a serial murderer we'll know why.

 

[Annyong]

That reminds me, we had to design our own cereal boxes in like 3rd grade and I made Jeffery Dahmer Cereal. Complete with little body part shaped marshmallows. My Dad spanked me when I was little too. Soooo

 

[Ministry of Pain]

I feel there is major disconnect here between adults pumping their fists saying it's not right to hit a kid. Just because society and the law have made it completely illegal to touch any other adult unless you want to go to jail…that's a completely different topic than spanking a kid.

For some reason this group of self proclaimed geniuses that run amok in here have defined abuse as any physical touching and contact of any kind from top to bottom…what is wrong with you all?

Spanking a child is abuse here in the FFA, do I have that right? I think spanking at certain times and for certain infractions in life is perfectly acceptable and needed to teach children hard lessons. The alternative which no one seems to acknowledge is down the line someone is gonna do it for you.

Take J.Martin for example from the Miami Dolphins, he was coddled his entire life, fancy parents who are lawyers, went to Stanford, probably was disciplined the right way to study, doubt his parents left much choice for him to do anything else but he is treated with kid gloves the whole way, given blue ribbons for pooping at the right time, and always around the best of the best in school. He ends up in the real world for the Miami Dolphins and he couldn't handle it. You can call him soft or whatever but he wasn't taught how to handle those situations and he failed, miserably. Martin was a total failure for the Miami Dolphins and even worse he almost brought the whole team down with him.

And there are more and more of his kind taking up space in Corporate America. And anyone that wants to make another snide comment about my parenting, I can say that I have never spanked my son and likely never will but if I had been more involved with him at a younger age, I'm sure it would have happened a couple times. But he's 14 years old now, we're past that point I think BUT if I thought I had to get his attention…if I thought he was bullying another kid for example I would put a stop to it. If he was not being respectful of a female I would do something to get his attention, not punch him the face but this stuff starts at home. Im not sure you all would like some of the things I do but I don't care, I am responsible for him not you all and being judged here in this place matters little out there.

I don't allow my son to carry a cell phone. Is that child abuse? He is one of the very few who doesn't have one but I don't feel it is necessary. I got along just fine without one growing up. I bet some of you think that is just horrible

 

[Henry Ford]

I feel there is major disconnect here between adults pumping their fists saying it's not right to hit a kid. Just because society and the law have made it completely illegal to touch any other adult unless you want to go to jailthat's a completely different topic than spanking a kid.

For some reason this group of self proclaimed geniuses that run amok in here have defined abuse as any physical touching and contact of any kind from top to bottomwhat is wrong with you all?

Spanking a child is abuse here in the FFA, do I have that right? I think spanking at certain times and for certain infractions in life is perfectly acceptable and needed to teach children hard lessons. The alternative which no one seems to acknowledge is down the line someone is gonna do it for you.

Take J.Martin for example from the Miami Dolphins, he was coddled his entire life, fancy parents who are lawyers, went to Stanford, probably was disciplined the right way to study, doubt his parents left much choice for him to do anything else but he is treated with kid gloves the whole way, given blue ribbons for pooping at the right time, and always around the best of the best in school. He ends up in the real world for the Miami Dolphins and he couldn't handle it. You can call him soft or whatever but he wasn't taught how to handle those situations and he failed, miserably. Martin was a total failure for the Miami Dolphins and even worse he almost brought the whole team down with him.

And there are more and more of his kind taking up space in Corporate America. And anyone that wants to make another snide comment about my parenting, I can't say that I have never spanked my son and likely never will but if I had been more involved with him at a younger age, I'm sure it would have happened a couple times. But he's 14 years old now, we're past that point I think BUT if I thought I had to get his attentionif I thought he was bullying another kid for example I would put a stop to it. If he was not being respectful of a female I would do something to get his attention, not punch him the face but this stuff starts at home. Im not sure you all would like some of the things I do but I don't care, I am responsible for him not you all and being judged here in this place matters little out there.

I don't allow my son to carry a cell phone. Is that child abuse? He is one of the very few who doesn't have one but I don't feel it is necessary. I got along just fine without one growing up. I bet some of you think that is just horrible

Are you bored or something? Because this is really dumb.

 

[Fennis]

I feel there is major disconnect here between adults pumping their fists saying it's not right to hit a kid. Just because society and the law have made it completely illegal to touch any other adult unless you want to go to jail…that's a completely different topic than spanking a kid.

For some reason this group of self proclaimed geniuses that run amok in here have defined abuse as any physical touching and contact of any kind from top to bottom…what is wrong with you all?

Spanking a child is abuse here in the FFA, do I have that right? I think spanking at certain times and for certain infractions in life is perfectly acceptable and needed to teach children hard lessons. The alternative which no one seems to acknowledge is down the line someone is gonna do it for you.

Take J.Martin for example from the Miami Dolphins, he was coddled his entire life, fancy parents who are lawyers, went to Stanford, probably was disciplined the right way to study, doubt his parents left much choice for him to do anything else but he is treated with kid gloves the whole way, given blue ribbons for pooping at the right time, and always around the best of the best in school. He ends up in the real world for the Miami Dolphins and he couldn't handle it. You can call him soft or whatever but he wasn't taught how to handle those situations and he failed, miserably. Martin was a total failure for the Miami Dolphins and even worse he almost brought the whole team down with him.

And there are more and more of his kind taking up space in Corporate America. And anyone that wants to make another snide comment about my parenting, I can say that I have never spanked my son and likely never will but if I had been more involved with him at a younger age, I'm sure it would have happened a couple times. But he's 14 years old now, we're past that point I think BUT if I thought I had to get his attention…if I thought he was bullying another kid for example I would put a stop to it. If he was not being respectful of a female I would do something to get his attention, not punch him the face but this stuff starts at home. Im not sure you all would like some of the things I do but I don't care, I am responsible for him not you all and being judged here in this place matters little out there.

I don't allow my son to carry a cell phone. Is that child abuse? He is one of the very few who doesn't have one but I don't feel it is necessary. I got along just fine without one growing up. I bet some of you think that is just horrible

all anyone has said is you shouldn't punch your kid

 

[Ministry of Pain]

all anyone has said is you shouldn't punch your kid

No not true at all in this thread. We have many many anti-spankers in here.

 

[eurotrashman]

I feel there is major disconnect here between adults pumping their fists saying it's not right to hit a kid. Just because society and the law have made it completely illegal to touch any other adult unless you want to go to jail…that's a completely different topic than spanking a kid.

For some reason this group of self proclaimed geniuses that run amok in here have defined abuse as any physical touching and contact of any kind from top to bottom…what is wrong with you all?

Spanking a child is abuse here in the FFA, do I have that right? I think spanking at certain times and for certain infractions in life is perfectly acceptable and needed to teach children hard lessons. The alternative which no one seems to acknowledge is down the line someone is gonna do it for you.

Take J.Martin for example from the Miami Dolphins, he was coddled his entire life, fancy parents who are lawyers, went to Stanford, probably was disciplined the right way to study, doubt his parents left much choice for him to do anything else but he is treated with kid gloves the whole way, given blue ribbons for pooping at the right time, and always around the best of the best in school. He ends up in the real world for the Miami Dolphins and he couldn't handle it. You can call him soft or whatever but he wasn't taught how to handle those situations and he failed, miserably. Martin was a total failure for the Miami Dolphins and even worse he almost brought the whole team down with him.

And there are more and more of his kind taking up space in Corporate America. And anyone that wants to make another snide comment about my parenting, I can say that I have never spanked my son and likely never will but if I had been more involved with him at a younger age, I'm sure it would have happened a couple times. But he's 14 years old now, we're past that point I think BUT if I thought I had to get his attention…if I thought he was bullying another kid for example I would put a stop to it. If he was not being respectful of a female I would do something to get his attention, not punch him the face but this stuff starts at home. Im not sure you all would like some of the things I do but I don't care, I am responsible for him not you all and being judged here in this place matters little out there.

I don't allow my son to carry a cell phone. Is that child abuse? He is one of the very few who doesn't have one but I don't feel it is necessary. I got along just fine without one growing up. I bet some of you think that is just horrible

TLDR

 

[Henry Ford]

I feel there is major disconnect here between adults pumping their fists saying it's not right to hit a kid. Just because society and the law have made it completely illegal to touch any other adult unless you want to go to jailthat's a completely different topic than spanking a kid.

For some reason this group of self proclaimed geniuses that run amok in here have defined abuse as any physical touching and contact of any kind from top to bottomwhat is wrong with you all?

Spanking a child is abuse here in the FFA, do I have that right? I think spanking at certain times and for certain infractions in life is perfectly acceptable and needed to teach children hard lessons. The alternative which no one seems to acknowledge is down the line someone is gonna do it for you.

Take J.Martin for example from the Miami Dolphins, he was coddled his entire life, fancy parents who are lawyers, went to Stanford, probably was disciplined the right way to study, doubt his parents left much choice for him to do anything else but he is treated with kid gloves the whole way, given blue ribbons for pooping at the right time, and always around the best of the best in school. He ends up in the real world for the Miami Dolphins and he couldn't handle it. You can call him soft or whatever but he wasn't taught how to handle those situations and he failed, miserably. Martin was a total failure for the Miami Dolphins and even worse he almost brought the whole team down with him.

And there are more and more of his kind taking up space in Corporate America. And anyone that wants to make another snide comment about my parenting, I can say that I have never spanked my son and likely never will but if I had been more involved with him at a younger age, I'm sure it would have happened a couple times. But he's 14 years old now, we're past that point I think BUT if I thought I had to get his attentionif I thought he was bullying another kid for example I would put a stop to it. If he was not being respectful of a female I would do something to get his attention, not punch him the face but this stuff starts at home. Im not sure you all would like some of the things I do but I don't care, I am responsible for him not you all and being judged here in this place matters little out there.

I don't allow my son to carry a cell phone. Is that child abuse? He is one of the very few who doesn't have one but I don't feel it is necessary. I got along just fine without one growing up. I bet some of you think that is just horrible

TLDR

Either you agree that it's okay to kick little girls in the teeth for spilling pancake batter or you must think it's child abuse to refuse to buy a kid a pony for her 3rd birthday.

 

[Ministry of Pain]

TLDR

If you went to school and made something of yourself instead of being a lowlife European piece of trash maybe you could bring yourself to read all of 5-6 short paragraphs.

 

[Henry Ford]

TLDR

If you went to school and made something of yourself instead of being a lowlife European piece of trash maybe you could bring yourself to read all of 5-6 short paragraphs.

If you weren't such an insufferable #####, you could probably take the time to count the paragraphs in your own post and decide if it's 5 or 6.

 

[bigbottom]

For some reason this group of self proclaimed geniuses that run amok in here have defined abuse as any physical touching and contact of any kind from top to bottomwhat is wrong with you all?

Link to the bolded?

Spanking a child is abuse here in the FFA, do I have that right?

I don't think you do.

 

[Henry Ford]

For some reason this group of self proclaimed geniuses that run amok in here have defined abuse as any physical touching and contact of any kind from top to bottomwhat is wrong with you all?

Link to the bolded?

Spanking a child is abuse here in the FFA, do I have that right?

I don't think you do.

To be fair, if a Top was in contact with my kid's bottom, it would sound like it might be an abuse situation.

 

[Grace Under Pressure]

Let's go no punching for now.

 

[DSP]

I was beaten by my father if that means anything

 

[Otis]

Abuse is subjective and it's impossible to define.

I think I spotted the problem.

 

[Henry Ford]

Abuse is subjective and it's impossible to define.

I think I spotted the problem.

Just like incest and folk music.

 

[Otis]

I feel there is major disconnect here between adults pumping their fists saying it's not right to hit a kid. Just because society and the law have made it completely illegal to touch any other adult unless you want to go to jail…that's a completely different topic than spanking a kid.

For some reason this group of self proclaimed geniuses that run amok in here have defined abuse as any physical touching and contact of any kind from top to bottom…what is wrong with you all?

Spanking a child is abuse here in the FFA, do I have that right? I think spanking at certain times and for certain infractions in life is perfectly acceptable and needed to teach children hard lessons. The alternative which no one seems to acknowledge is down the line someone is gonna do it for you.

Take J.Martin for example from the Miami Dolphins, he was coddled his entire life, fancy parents who are lawyers, went to Stanford, probably was disciplined the right way to study, doubt his parents left much choice for him to do anything else but he is treated with kid gloves the whole way, given blue ribbons for pooping at the right time, and always around the best of the best in school. He ends up in the real world for the Miami Dolphins and he couldn't handle it. You can call him soft or whatever but he wasn't taught how to handle those situations and he failed, miserably. Martin was a total failure for the Miami Dolphins and even worse he almost brought the whole team down with him.

And there are more and more of his kind taking up space in Corporate America. And anyone that wants to make another snide comment about my parenting, I can say that I have never spanked my son and likely never will but if I had been more involved with him at a younger age, I'm sure it would have happened a couple times. But he's 14 years old now, we're past that point I think BUT if I thought I had to get his attention…if I thought he was bullying another kid for example I would put a stop to it. If he was not being respectful of a female I would do something to get his attention, not punch him the face but this stuff starts at home. Im not sure you all would like some of the things I do but I don't care, I am responsible for him not you all and being judged here in this place matters little out there.

I don't allow my son to carry a cell phone. Is that child abuse? He is one of the very few who doesn't have one but I don't feel it is necessary. I got along just fine without one growing up. I bet some of you think that is just horrible

Ah, finally, the voice of reason is here.

 

[eurotrashman]

TLDR

If you went to school and made something of yourself instead of being a lowlife European piece of trash maybe you could bring yourself to read all of 5-6 short paragraphs.

I don't read anything you post.

 

[snellman]

Part of me knew it would go down this way if the FFA but that is ok. I put it out there more for the fact that I did not realize there was a state law out there on spanking. I understand that people are brought up differently and have different views on raising children. I was brought up in a family that believed in spanking and believed in discipline and I feel the same way with my children if the situation warrants. Looking back was I wrong to "punch" my son, yes but there is nothing I can do about it now other than learn from it and move on.

I think what frustrates me more than anything is the fact that there are more dire circumstances for children out there than my situation (the "investigator" that was at our house made that statement). and yet they are spending time, energy and resources on this.

 

[Ministry of Pain]

TLDR

If you went to school and made something of yourself instead of being a lowlife European piece of trash maybe you could bring yourself to read all of 5-6 short paragraphs.

I don't read anything you post.

Right, you've trickled into the top 5 on my fan club around here.

 

[bigbottom]

Part of me knew it would go down this way if the FFA but that is ok. I put it out there more for the fact that I did not realize there was a state law out there on spanking. I understand that people are brought up differently and have different views on raising children. I was brought up in a family that believed in spanking and believed in discipline and I feel the same way with my children if the situation warrants. Looking back was I wrong to "punch" my son, yes but there is nothing I can do about it now other than learn from it and move on.

I think what frustrates me more than anything is the fact that there are more dire circumstances for children out there than my situation (the "investigator" that was at our house made that statement). and yet they are spending time, energy and resources on this.

Sure. But from their perspective, they need to satisfy themselves that yours is not one of the more dire circumstances. Once they do, that will be the end of it.

 

[Henry Ford]

Part of me knew it would go down this way if the FFA but that is ok. I put it out there more for the fact that I did not realize there was a state law out there on spanking. I understand that people are brought up differently and have different views on raising children. I was brought up in a family that believed in spanking and believed in discipline and I feel the same way with my children if the situation warrants. Looking back was I wrong to "punch" my son, yes but there is nothing I can do about it now other than learn from it and move on.

I think what frustrates me more than anything is the fact that there are more dire circumstances for children out there than my situation (the "investigator" that was at our house made that statement). and yet they are spending time, energy and resources on this.

Yes. Best case scenario, you created a situation which wastes their time and prevents them from moving on to the more dire situations more quickly.

 

[Ministry of Pain]

Looking back was I wrong to "punch" my son.

I can't speak for everyone but I think that's a great admission, most in here never own up to their mistakes.

 

[sublimeone]

Part of me knew it would go down this way if the FFA but that is ok. I put it out there more for the fact that I did not realize there was a state law out there on spanking. I understand that people are brought up differently and have different views on raising children. I was brought up in a family that believed in spanking and believed in discipline and I feel the same way with my children if the situation warrants. Looking back was I wrong to "punch" my son, yes but there is nothing I can do about it now other than learn from it and move on.

I think what frustrates me more than anything is the fact that there are more dire circumstances for children out there than my situation (the "investigator" that was at our house made that statement). and yet they are spending time, energy and resources on this.

Good to hear the the investigator was a reasonable person

 

[Zow]

Part of me knew it would go down this way if the FFA but that is ok. I put it out there more for the fact that I did not realize there was a state law out there on spanking. I understand that people are brought up differently and have different views on raising children. I was brought up in a family that believed in spanking and believed in discipline and I feel the same way with my children if the situation warrants. Looking back was I wrong to "punch" my son, yes but there is nothing I can do about it now other than learn from it and move on.

I think what frustrates me more than anything is the fact that there are more dire circumstances for children out there than my situation (the "investigator" that was at our house made that statement). and yet they are spending time, energy and resources on this.

When they get word from what I presume is a mandatory reporting agency like a school, where the allegation is that a parent/step-parent punched a child and there is a bruise, they're going to investigate it. Period. And I think most people you ask would be okay with that.

As others have mentioned you got lucky. I personally don't think what you did (while stupid) warrants removal. And I wasn't trying to be a downer earlier. But stranger things have happened and CPS/DHS/DSS has more discretion/freedom than most government agencies.

 

[cstu]

I was beaten by my father if that means anything

The prosecution rests.

 

[SHIZNITTTT]

So does DHS punch you in the arm and now ask you " do you like it " You want me to come over here and punch you every time you punch your kid?

 

[dozer]

I was beaten by my father if that means anything

Take a number pal. No excuse for your mess.

 

[DSP]

I was beaten by my father if that means anything

Take a number pal. No excuse for your mess.

Beaten, not spanked. As in the illegal in every state kind

 

[dozer]

I was beaten by my father if that means anything

Take a number pal. No excuse for your mess.

Beaten, not spanked. As in the illegal in every state kind

Right. I believe you. So where a lot of people. We've all got problems.

 

[DSP]

I was beaten by my father if that means anything

Take a number pal. No excuse for your mess.

Beaten, not spanked. As in the illegal in every state kind

Right. I believe you. So where a lot of people. We've all got problems.

Did I use it an excuse for anything?

 

[parasaurolophus]

I have 5 children (19,18,17,11, and 6). The 2 oldest are mine from previous marriage, the next 2 are wife's and the youngest is ours together. A week ago the 11 and 6 yr old were playing xbox and arguing like brothers do when the youngest one started crying pretty loud so I went to see what was going on. The 6 year old said that the 11 yr old punched him. At first the 11 yr old denied it but after more questioning he admitted to it and said he punched him because "he wasn't playing the game right, was annoying me, and wasn't listening to me." I punched the 11 yr old in the arm, asked him how it felt and if he would like me to punch him every time he didn't listen.

The 11 yr old bruises easily (you should see his legs in the summer, they are always black and blue) so we notice a bruise there later that night. Not a big deal or so I thought. Today, DHS calls and says they are investigating possible abuse that was reported by the school and want to know if they can talk to us. They have already talked to the 11 yr old and have to talk to the rest of the family. I say that is fine, I have nothing to hide. One of the questions they ask is how we discipline our children. We tell them that time outs, grounding and spanking. The person then proceeds to tell me that spanking is legal in the state of Iowa as long it is not done with foreign objects and does not injure. Needless to say, I was very because I did not know there was such a law.

My parents and grand parents could have been in huge trouble back in the day because I had the belt and yard stick used on me more than once. I understand that they are doing their job, but now I understand why our society is turning out the way it is.

Hey Snell, 1st of all I understand why you did this. I grew up in a family where the same type of discipline would have happened. Long term I think it probably was the best thing to do for the 11 year old. There also is the 6 year old to consider. It's not a bad lesson that the 6 year old learns if they don't act right they could get a whooping from an older brother…I understand wanting to step in and stick up for him…plus the 6 year old is biologically yours.

I know some in here will lecture you, but this is why you might go for a straight whack on the behind even at 11. 1st of all a traditional spanking is more embarrassing than it hurts. I've seen kids get 1 swift whack on the bottom and break into a crying fit, you woulda thought they lost a limb. Butts don't bruise like that arm you punched, plus a grown 35-40 year old man is gonna leave a mark on an 11 year old.

I would reach out to your 11 year old son who I don't think is a bad kid and maybe patch that up a little. A special ice cream cone with none of the other kids, maybe some type of special words like "You know I love you and it hurts me"...

Lastly, God Bless you for raising 5 kids and doing the best you can. Get thru the DHS stuff and then get things back to normal. I would have a special outing with the 11 year old and then I would do something with the whole family and just preach/spread the joy n love to everyone.

Hang in there Snell, brave of you to share this story, I'm sure a few are gonna want to make you out to be a child abuser which you're not.

Cheers

This is your argument in favor of spanking?

The fact that you have seen kids act like crybabies when they get spanked is proof that it is effective?

 

[Henry Ford]

I was beaten by my father if that means anything

Take a number pal. No excuse for your mess.

Beaten, not spanked. As in the illegal in every state kind

Lots of that going around in previous generations.

 

[McGarnicle]

If the little girl spilled the pancake batter in that space between the stove and the counter, I would definitely kick her in the teeth. You know how hard it is to clean in there??

 

[Henry Ford]

If the little girl spilled the pancake batter in that space between the stove and the counter, I would definitely kick her in the teeth. You know how hard it is to clean in there??

If she bleeds on the floor, she'll get something to really cry about.

 

[McGarnicle]

If the little girl spilled the pancake batter in that space between the stove and the counter, I would definitely kick her in the teeth. You know how hard it is to clean in there??

If she bleeds on the floor, she'll get something to really cry about.

Damn right. But you know what? That little girl is all grown up now, and she's gold medal gymnast Mary Lou Retton. I believe I've just given you all something to think about.

 

[Limp Ditka]

I was beaten by my father if that means anything

The prosecution rests.

Shame his dad did.

 

[DSP]

I was beaten by my father if that means anything

The prosecution rests.

Shame his dad did.

That is a really vile comment. To anyone

 

[scottybo]

WhyTF is MOP trying so hard to compare a punch to the arm with spanking?

 

[scottybo]

Overreactions happen. In the heat of the moment it seemed like the right way to prove a point. I wouldn't go as far as calling it child abuse, but I wouldn't do it to my son. I strongly advise you to control your temper/emotions and actions next time. Banning the 11 yr old from the game for a week may have been a more worthwhile punishment. Everyone has their own parenting style but it should not include punching.

 

[Frostillicus]

I now I understand why our society is turning out the way it is.

Lol. I'll take the society that tries to protect kids from abuse, thanks.

Such a prissy girl you are.

 

[Dr. Gobbler]

A lot of whining going on in here. Why don't you guys take your over developed 12 year old selves, bend over and give yourselves a smack.

Snap out of it!

Boo hoo, Daddy got a little rough with me for acting like a jerk. Look at my arm, this is what you get in my house for spilling paint in the garage.

DID I STUTTER?!?

 

[grateful zed]

was there blood?

 

[Frostillicus]

A lot of whining going on in here. Why don't you guys take your over developed 12 year old selves, bend over and give yourselves a smack.

Snap out of it!

Boo hoo, Daddy got a little rough with me for acting like a jerk. Look at my arm, this is what you get in my house for spilling paint in the garage.

DID I STUTTER?!?

Did you pay off your bet yet?

 

[Dr. Gobbler]

A lot of whining going on in here. Why don't you guys take your over developed 12 year old selves, bend over and give yourselves a smack.

Snap out of it!

Boo hoo, Daddy got a little rough with me for acting like a jerk. Look at my arm, this is what you get in my house for spilling paint in the garage.

DID I STUTTER?!?

Did you pay off your bet yet?

I have a personal policy not to pay supporters of rape, pedophilia, rapists or pedophiles.Sorry, but a man has to have a code.

 

[Limp Ditka]

A lot of whining going on in here. Why don't you guys take your over developed 12 year old selves, bend over and give yourselves a smack.

Snap out of it!

Boo hoo, Daddy got a little rough with me for acting like a jerk. Look at my arm, this is what you get in my house for spilling paint in the garage.

DID I STUTTER?!?

Did you pay off your bet yet?

I have a personal policy not to pay supporters of rape, pedophilia, rapists or pedophiles.Sorry, but a man has to have a code.

So you haven't paid off a wager, from last year, based on what happened last weekend?

 

[spOOfy]

I feel there is major disconnect here between adults pumping their fists saying it's not right to hit a kid. Just because society and the law have made it completely illegal to touch any other adult unless you want to go to jail…that's a completely different topic than spanking a kid.

For some reason this group of self proclaimed geniuses that run amok in here have defined abuse as any physical touching and contact of any kind from top to bottom…what is wrong with you all?

Spanking a child is abuse here in the FFA, do I have that right? I think spanking at certain times and for certain infractions in life is perfectly acceptable and needed to teach children hard lessons. The alternative which no one seems to acknowledge is down the line someone is gonna do it for you.

Take J.Martin for example from the Miami Dolphins, he was coddled his entire life, fancy parents who are lawyers, went to Stanford, probably was disciplined the right way to study, doubt his parents left much choice for him to do anything else but he is treated with kid gloves the whole way, given blue ribbons for pooping at the right time, and always around the best of the best in school. He ends up in the real world for the Miami Dolphins and he couldn't handle it. You can call him soft or whatever but he wasn't taught how to handle those situations and he failed, miserably. Martin was a total failure for the Miami Dolphins and even worse he almost brought the whole team down with him.

And there are more and more of his kind taking up space in Corporate America. And anyone that wants to make another snide comment about my parenting, I can say that I have never spanked my son and likely never will but if I had been more involved with him at a younger age, I'm sure it would have happened a couple times. But he's 14 years old now, we're past that point I think BUT if I thought I had to get his attention…if I thought he was bullying another kid for example I would put a stop to it. If he was not being respectful of a female I would do something to get his attention, not punch him the face but this stuff starts at home. Im not sure you all would like some of the things I do but I don't care, I am responsible for him not you all and being judged here in this place matters little out there.

I don't allow my son to carry a cell phone. Is that child abuse? He is one of the very few who doesn't have one but I don't feel it is necessary. I got along just fine without one growing up. I bet some of you think that is just horrible

you are coming across as beyond dumb right now.

 

[Dr. Gobbler]

A lot of whining going on in here. Why don't you guys take your over developed 12 year old selves, bend over and give yourselves a smack.

Snap out of it!

Boo hoo, Daddy got a little rough with me for acting like a jerk. Look at my arm, this is what you get in my house for spilling paint in the garage.

DID I STUTTER?!?

Did you pay off your bet yet?

I have a personal policy not to pay supporters of rape, pedophilia, rapists or pedophiles.Sorry, but a man has to have a code.

So you haven't paid off a wager, from last year, based on what happened last weekend?

Just because it took some of you slow minded Neanderthals until last weekend to finally get it, doesnt mean that some of us haven't seen this from a mile away. HTH

 

[Limp Ditka]

A lot of whining going on in here. Why don't you guys take your over developed 12 year old selves, bend over and give yourselves a smack.

Snap out of it!

Boo hoo, Daddy got a little rough with me for acting like a jerk. Look at my arm, this is what you get in my house for spilling paint in the garage.

DID I STUTTER?!?

Did you pay off your bet yet?

I have a personal policy not to pay supporters of rape, pedophilia, rapists or pedophiles.Sorry, but a man has to have a code.

So you haven't paid off a wager, from last year, based on what happened last weekend?

Just because it took some of you slow minded Neanderthals until last weekend to finally get it, doesnt mean that some of us haven't seen this from a mile away. HTH

It doesn't help.



welching #####es >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Hitler>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>tim

 

[Clifford]

It sounds like you are sort of minimizing this to an extent. The whole "he bruises easy" is a pretty convenient excuse.

I am guessing however that for DHS to become involved, a mandatory reported (such as a teacher or a doctor) saw the bruises and they were significant enough to raise red flags. So there is probably more than just a little mark.

I think there is some potential for problems for you here. This wasn't just a slap or a spanking. When you enter into the world of punching a kid, there are potential criminal implications. Just saying....

Oh in Colorado, CPS and DSS are called DHS here as well.

I'm presently involved in a Dependency case (the legal term for the court proceeding where CPS/DSS/DHS has stepped in and removed a child) where the sole basis for removal when an unexplained bruise. Was reported on an anonymous tip line.

The father involved now gets to see his kids (that's right, plural, because CPS usually doesn't just remove one) 1-2 times a week for a couple hours with some old woman volunteer looking over his shoulder. This is in between "voluntarily" submitting to numerous services and going to court 1-2x/month to have some dickbag lawyers dissect his and his family's life.

Hopefully this doesn't happen to the OP, but saying things like "he bruises easily" to DHS/CPS and then making admissions to punching a kid hard enough to leave a bruise is a substantial step towards getting there.

Please tell me there was more to it than a single, unexplained bruise. Kids get bruises all the time, Sounds like a system out of control if that is literally the only piece of evidenced required for the state to remove kids from their parents. Was it an especially bad bruise or a black eye or something? Did the father cause the bruise?

Black eye. Cause is up for debate and will likely be litigated soon at a trial.

More to my point though is that even a bruise/black eye is likely enough evidence for the state to get involved and, even in best case scenario, likely cause one to have his kid removed for a period of time and have to go through the court process.

So the state removes your child for the process of the trial before you are even convicted of any wrongdoing at all? And of course the state controls the trial process and how long that takes as well, right?

1. Yes. And a parent's rights to a child can be severed with no conviction at all because the burden of proof is lower than beyond reasonable doubt.

2. Yes… although ideally through the separation of powers so that it is in accordance with due process.

That is nothing short of horrifying. Is this the same across all states? I assume that in cases where no child abuse was found there is no legal recourse for the parent to sue DSP/CPS either, right? Or is it one of things like leaving the Soviet Union, no law against it but good luck?

1. I don't know but my guess is probably yes.

2. There is a distinction between "conviction" and "finding" of abuse. Conviction refers to proof beyond reasonable doubt. A finding in a CPS case by a judge of ongoing abuse or whatever needs to be only proven by clear and convincing evidence. So, it's very possible to litigate over alleged abuse in a CPS case with that nucleus of fact never entering the criminal court. And since the burden of proof is less, a parent could have his or her rights severed without definitive proof.

3. Regarding suing CPS, I'd defer to other lawyers who handle civil rights type claims. I'd imagine there would be a cause of action if CPS totally crapped all over a person's due process rights. But following due process isn't that tough and CPS can still arguably badly screw with someone's life and not violate a civil right.

Really cementing my opinions about CPS being an entity that needs a complete and total rewrite in terms of what it does and how it does it. I've only heard anecdotal evidence and haven't seen statistics but most cases I have heard, life generally gets worse for kids once they get removed from their parents.

The fact that there is a lighter burden of proof to remove a child from their parents than there is for a misdemeanor is extremely troubling, especially given what we know about the level of expertise and excellence in CPS. Do you do a lot of these cases? Ever follow up with the kids after one?