Hypothetical scenario - please give hypothetical advice (1 Viewer)

[GOB]

Send them to me, I can usually do some sleuthing and find the hacker that way.

And by sleuthing I mean pleasuring myself.

 

[Henry Ford]

"I don't want there to be a big scandal that makes it seem like I'm some kind of pervert while I'm trying to become a lawyer."

What kind of perv are we talking about here?

Are talking two naked women with a funnel and a fish?

two naked women using a funnel and fish to commit an unnatural sex act.”Read more at http://blacksportsonline.com/home/2011/01/afl-coach-tim-marcum-racist-obama-emails-weird-porn-revealed-in-lawsuit/#chZWxMKBeOpgt25x.99
“a video of two naked women using a funnel and fish to commit an unnatural sex act.”Read more at http://blacksportsonline.com/home/2011/01/afl-coach-tim-marcum-racist-obama-emails-weird-porn-revealed-in-lawsuit/#chZWxMKBeOpgt25x.99

I don't have any idea what they were doing, but as horrified as he was, I'm guessing it must involve something weird.

 

[Henry Ford]

"I don't want there to be a big scandal that makes it seem like I'm some kind of pervert while I'm trying to become a lawyer."

He thinks pretty highly of himself. Why would his employer care unless his GF is a partner's wife?

More importantly, what kind of club does he think he's joining?

 

[FUBAR]

"I don't want there to be a big scandal that makes it seem like I'm some kind of pervert while I'm trying to become a lawyer."

he met the requirements. Welcome to the 9th floor.

Right. He's trying to become a lawyer not a judge or politician. Sure he may have those goals longterm, but what are the odds random hacker kid is going to still have copies of those pics thirty years from now? ETA: Besides, thirty years from now all of his peers will probably be like "who didn't have naked pics on their phone?"Schlzm

Either way, having someone else steal pictures of you committing unnatural acts with your girlfriend isn't going to keep you from becoming a judge. And it sure as hell isn't going to keep you from being a plaintiff's attorney.

now we need details.

 

[Henry Ford]

"I don't want there to be a big scandal that makes it seem like I'm some kind of pervert while I'm trying to become a lawyer."

he met the requirements. Welcome to the 9th floor.

Right. He's trying to become a lawyer not a judge or politician. Sure he may have those goals longterm, but what are the odds random hacker kid is going to still have copies of those pics thirty years from now? ETA: Besides, thirty years from now all of his peers will probably be like "who didn't have naked pics on their phone?"Schlzm

Either way, having someone else steal pictures of you committing unnatural acts with your girlfriend isn't going to keep you from becoming a judge. And it sure as hell isn't going to keep you from being a plaintiff's attorney.

now we need details.

I have none. Again, I just assume.

 

[Schlzm]

"I don't want there to be a big scandal that makes it seem like I'm some kind of pervert while I'm trying to become a lawyer."

he met the requirements. Welcome to the 9th floor.

Right. He's trying to become a lawyer not a judge or politician. Sure he may have those goals longterm, but what are the odds random hacker kid is going to still have copies of those pics thirty years from now? ETA: Besides, thirty years from now all of his peers will probably be like "who didn't have naked pics on their phone?"Schlzm

Either way, having someone else steal pictures of you committing unnatural acts with your girlfriend isn't going to keep you from becoming a judge. And it sure as hell isn't going to keep you from being a plaintiff's attorney.

Exactly. Go with the wang pic idea. Tell him to post this kids email in every public location he can. Send him a different weang pic every day, like a wang of the month club. Schlzm

 

[TheIronSheik]

Okay, I guess I can trust you guys. This conversation really just happened. In my office. With a very frightened looking law clerk.

Wait, this is real? This changes everything.

 

[TheIronSheik]

Officer Pete Malloy, Schlzm, Facebook (2), E Street Brat, kutta, Herc, WampusCat43, Jedi Knight, kentric, jplvr


Does this mean he and his GF are reading this?

 

[Henry Ford]

Officer Pete Malloy, Schlzm, Facebook (2), E Street Brat, kutta, Herc, WampusCat43, Jedi Knight, kentric, jplvr


Does this mean he and his GF are reading this?

Boy, I hope not.

If he is, "Jim, not one person you work with or for cares at all if we all get pictures of you and your girlfriend in our email inboxes. This will not keep you from getting a tremendous job. Or, you know, this job."

 

[E Street Brat]

"I don't want there to be a big scandal that makes it seem like I'm some kind of pervert while I'm trying to become a lawyer."

he met the requirements. Welcome to the 9th floor.

Right. He's trying to become a lawyer not a judge or politician. Sure he may have those goals longterm, but what are the odds random hacker kid is going to still have copies of those pics thirty years from now? ETA: Besides, thirty years from now all of his peers will probably be like "who didn't have naked pics on their phone?"Schlzm

Either way, having someone else steal pictures of you committing unnatural acts with your girlfriend isn't going to keep you from becoming a judge. And it sure as hell isn't going to keep you from being a plaintiff's attorney.

Exactly. Go with the wang pic idea. Tell him to post this kids email in every public location he can. Send him a different weang pic every day, like a wang of the month club.Schlzm

It's the gift that keeps on giving, Clark

 

[Loan Sharks]

Have him tell the hacker they need to send a photo of them holding a penny and a fish to prove its legit.

 

[Maik Jeaunz]

ask for his phone, beat the crap out of it with a hammer, and then tell him "problem solved."

[/ronswanson]

 

[inca911]

Have him do nothing, except delete emails if they come. The picture thief needs to communicate to extort anything, so don't provide an opportunity. If there are no fish in the pond, people generally give up fishing.

 

[Henry Ford]

Have him do nothing, except delete emails if they come. The picture thief needs to communicate to extort anything, so don't provide an opportunity. If there are no fish in the pond, people generally give up fishing.

I'm not going to tell him to delete emails admitting to crimes. That would be not very smart.

 

[Zow]

which state?

 

[Henry Ford]

which state?

Panic, judging by his face.

 

[Zow]

Okay, I guess I can trust you guys. This conversation really just happened. In my office. With a very frightened looking law clerk.

Pffft. I hear that there are law clerks who put ridiculously embarrassing stuff and pictures of themselves and their girlfriends on the internet while in law school who turn out just fine. Kid will be fine.

 

[Zow]

which state?

Panic, judging by his face.

Please for all things awesome tell him to put this on his character and fitness.

 

[SWC]

just call the cops brohan and then go and let them just squash that guy they will set it up and bam next thing you know some john law is kneeling on this jbags neck and he is crying and double bam bad boys bad boys start playing and you know they are beating that guy senseless the minute the credits roll take that to the bank brohans but in all honesty just swallow your pride and call the cops and let them get this jboy

 

[NCCommish]

just call the cops brohan and then go and let them just squash that guy they will set it up and bam next thing you know some john law is kneeling on this jbags neck and he is crying and double bam bad boys bad boys start playing and you know they are beating that guy senseless the minute the credits roll take that to the bank brohans but in all honesty just swallow your pride and call the cops and let them get this jboy

Lock it up

 

[Sarnoff]

"I don't want there to be a big scandal that makes it seem like I'm some kind of pervert while I'm trying to become a lawyer."

If I had a dollar for every time Woz said this...

 

[Vike Me]

But she caught me on the counter (It wasn't me)

Saw me bangin' on the sofa (It wasn't me)

I even had her in the shower (It wasn't me)

She even caught me on camera (It wasn't me)

Well, maybe it wasn't you.

 

[Ron Swanson]

ask for his phone, beat the crap out of it with a hammer, and then tell him "problem solved."

[/ronswanson]

Excellent idea.

 

[AAABatteries]

"So, I've got a twin brother...."

 

[the moops]

Have him do nothing, except delete emails if they come. The picture thief needs to communicate to extort anything, so don't provide an opportunity. If there are no fish in the pond, people generally give up fishing.

I'm not going to tell him to delete emails admitting to crimes. That would be not very smart.

OK, Tell him to archive them

 

[Zow]

"I don't want there to be a big scandal that makes it seem like I'm some kind of pervert while I'm trying to become a lawyer."

If I had a dollar for every time Woz said this...

I wish I had a dollar for every time I said that.

 

[Yankee23Fan]

I would just ignore it. It's a scam and if it is actually real he needs to play it up to the partners.... what you don't do that to your wife with a turkey baster?

 

[Yankee23Fan]

Oh and I would not let him live this down for basically ever. He needs a nickname now to remind him of this incident.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

Oh and I would not let him live this down for basically ever. He needs a nickname now to remind him of this incident.

Merv?

 

[trogg78]

I just sent out 2000 emails saying I hacked people's phones and will provide the information to their s/o if they don't send me $2000. Hypothetically, how many will bite?

 

[Henry Ford]

Oh and I would not let him live this down for basically ever. He needs a nickname now to remind him of this incident.

I did refer to him as Senor Danger when he left for the day.

 

[Henry Ford]

which state?

Panic, judging by his face.

Please for all things awesome tell him to put this on his character and fitness.

I told him that the Louisiana Bar won't even let you join if you're under 40 and they suspect your penis isn't on the internet somewhere.

 

[KCitons]

I just sent out 2000 emails saying I hacked people's phones and will provide the information to their s/o if they don't send me $2000. Hypothetically, how many will bite?

where should I send my $2000?

 

[Guest]

I just sent out 2000 emails saying I hacked people's phones and will provide the information to their s/o if they don't send me $2000. Hypothetically, how many will bite?

I think you shot too high on the payoff. Would you rather have 5 people send you $2000, or 100 people send you $100?

 

[wazoo11]

Sleep with his aunt flo

 

[Zow]

Some serious insight:

A couple months ago I got to interview our county's lead detective on electronic crimes and a PI who specializes in cellular data extraction and wiretapping. Per both of them they said it is incredibly difficult and takes ridiculous equipment and skill to be able to remotely hack a cell phone. Granted, they did say on the scale of difficulty the iPhone was on the easier end, but still said it takes some serious ability to hack without ever being able to physically handle the phone.

 

[TheIronSheik]

Some serious insight:

A couple months ago I got to interview our county's lead detective on electronic crimes and a PI who specializes in cellular data extraction and wiretapping. Per both of them they said it is incredibly difficult and takes ridiculous equipment and skill to be able to remotely hack a cell phone. Granted, they did say on the scale of difficulty the iPhone was on the easier end, but still said it takes some serious ability to hack without ever being able to physically handle the phone.

I don't doubt you, but how is it any different than hacking a laptop?

 

[mr roboto]

Can you trace an email account to a person? Or would you need to set up a meeting to catch him?

 

[Schlzm]

Some serious insight:

A couple months ago I got to interview our county's lead detective on electronic crimes and a PI who specializes in cellular data extraction and wiretapping. Per both of them they said it is incredibly difficult and takes ridiculous equipment and skill to be able to remotely hack a cell phone. Granted, they did say on the scale of difficulty the iPhone was on the easier end, but still said it takes some serious ability to hack without ever being able to physically handle the phone.

I don't doubt you, but how is it any different than hacking a laptop?

Varies. If the phone is connecting to WiFi it really isn't all that different. If the phone stays on carrier then you need the target to download, install and run a malicious app. If the user decides to sync all of the crap on their phone with a cloud service then it comes down to the services security and how strong of a password they used.Schlzm

 

[TheIronSheik]

Some serious insight:

A couple months ago I got to interview our county's lead detective on electronic crimes and a PI who specializes in cellular data extraction and wiretapping. Per both of them they said it is incredibly difficult and takes ridiculous equipment and skill to be able to remotely hack a cell phone. Granted, they did say on the scale of difficulty the iPhone was on the easier end, but still said it takes some serious ability to hack without ever being able to physically handle the phone.

I don't doubt you, but how is it any different than hacking a laptop?

Varies. If the phone is connecting to WiFi it really isn't all that different. If the phone stays on carrier then you need the target to download, install and run a malicious app. If the user decides to sync all of the crap on their phone with a cloud service then it comes down to the services security and how strong of a password they used.Schlzm

That makes sense. I think I'm just used to my phone always being on a wifi network.

 

[Henry Ford]

Some serious insight:

A couple months ago I got to interview our county's lead detective on electronic crimes and a PI who specializes in cellular data extraction and wiretapping. Per both of them they said it is incredibly difficult and takes ridiculous equipment and skill to be able to remotely hack a cell phone. Granted, they did say on the scale of difficulty the iPhone was on the easier end, but still said it takes some serious ability to hack without ever being able to physically handle the phone.

I don't doubt you, but how is it any different than hacking a laptop?

Varies. If the phone is connecting to WiFi it really isn't all that different. If the phone stays on carrier then you need the target to download, install and run a malicious app. If the user decides to sync all of the crap on their phone with a cloud service then it comes down to the services security and how strong of a password they used.Schlzm

If we can go back to hypotheticals, it's fairly possible that anyone this hypothetically happened to might have had his phone syncing with a hypothetical cloud service.

 

[Schlzm]

Some serious insight:

A couple months ago I got to interview our county's lead detective on electronic crimes and a PI who specializes in cellular data extraction and wiretapping. Per both of them they said it is incredibly difficult and takes ridiculous equipment and skill to be able to remotely hack a cell phone. Granted, they did say on the scale of difficulty the iPhone was on the easier end, but still said it takes some serious ability to hack without ever being able to physically handle the phone.

I don't doubt you, but how is it any different than hacking a laptop?

Varies. If the phone is connecting to WiFi it really isn't all that different. If the phone stays on carrier then you need the target to download, install and run a malicious app. If the user decides to sync all of the crap on their phone with a cloud service then it comes down to the services security and how strong of a password they used.Schlzm

That makes sense. I think I'm just used to my phone always being on a wifi network.

Another item that is being "field tested" are malicious platform independant advertisement based droppers. We've seen plenty of this activity on standard computer systems but due to the standardization of phone operating systems code is being tweaked to include mobile platforms as well, so surfing to a site that has one of these ads in its rotation could result in a compromise. Schlzm

 

[Schlzm]

Some serious insight:

A couple months ago I got to interview our county's lead detective on electronic crimes and a PI who specializes in cellular data extraction and wiretapping. Per both of them they said it is incredibly difficult and takes ridiculous equipment and skill to be able to remotely hack a cell phone. Granted, they did say on the scale of difficulty the iPhone was on the easier end, but still said it takes some serious ability to hack without ever being able to physically handle the phone.

I don't doubt you, but how is it any different than hacking a laptop?

Varies. If the phone is connecting to WiFi it really isn't all that different. If the phone stays on carrier then you need the target to download, install and run a malicious app. If the user decides to sync all of the crap on their phone with a cloud service then it comes down to the services security and how strong of a password they used.Schlzm

If we can go back to hypotheticals, it's fairly possible that anyone this hypothetically happened to might have had his phone syncing with a hypothetical cloud service.

Password rest to something stronger and lesson learned. Or you know, don't just blast every intimate part of your life out to the ether.Schlzm

 

[Henry Ford]

Some serious insight:

A couple months ago I got to interview our county's lead detective on electronic crimes and a PI who specializes in cellular data extraction and wiretapping. Per both of them they said it is incredibly difficult and takes ridiculous equipment and skill to be able to remotely hack a cell phone. Granted, they did say on the scale of difficulty the iPhone was on the easier end, but still said it takes some serious ability to hack without ever being able to physically handle the phone.

I don't doubt you, but how is it any different than hacking a laptop?

Varies. If the phone is connecting to WiFi it really isn't all that different. If the phone stays on carrier then you need the target to download, install and run a malicious app. If the user decides to sync all of the crap on their phone with a cloud service then it comes down to the services security and how strong of a password they used.Schlzm

If we can go back to hypotheticals, it's fairly possible that anyone this hypothetically happened to might have had his phone syncing with a hypothetical cloud service.

Password rest to something stronger and lesson learned. Or you know, don't just blast every intimate part of your life out to the ether.Schlzm

Indeed.

 

[SWC]

listen i saw on alaska troopers that these cops would sit up on a bluff with some binoculars and then bust guys for fishing wrong and hells bells if there are guys that will bust you for fishing wrong i mean holy cow its like hey you are using a rapala when you can only use live bait i know you are thinking did i fire five shots or six well in all the excitement i sort of lost track myself so are you feeling lucky punk you just know that they are going to go all wyatt erp on some sucker commiting blackmail so my suggestion is to call the alaska state troopers and get them on the job take that to the bank brohans

 

[TheIronSheik]

listen i saw on alaska troopers that these cops would sit up on a bluff with some binoculars and then bust guys for fishing wrong and hells bells if there are guys that will bust you for fishing wrong i mean holy cow its like hey you are using a rapala when you can only use live bait i know you are thinking did i fire five shots or six well in all the excitement i sort of lost track myself so are you feeling lucky punk you just know that they are going to go all wyatt erp on some sucker commiting blackmail so my suggestion is to call the alaska state troopers and get them on the job take that to the bank brohans

That's what I was going to say.

 

[SWC]

hey brohan those guys cover the whole matsu valley by themselfs and eveyrone up there has a gun you think they are going to be afraid of some little puke trying to blackmail a brohan heck no they are probably going to find that guy surround his house and then take him out of there in cuffs and probably on a snowmobile take that to the bank brohans

 

[fatness]

Someone (let's call him Jim) comes to you and says he got a disturbing email. The email said something to the effect of "Hey, Jim, you don't know me, but I pulled all the private photos and video off of your iphone remotely while learning how to hack apple systems, and I think I may send them to your girlfriend."

Jim asks you for advice. He tells you that the photos/video in question are "sensitive" and "embarrassing" but not illegal. What's your suggestion?

1. I think it's a scam and no one has any pictures.

2. Post the full message source from the email and let some of the experts see where it came from and whether it looks legit or not. I'm betting "not".

 

[Zow]

Some serious insight:

A couple months ago I got to interview our county's lead detective on electronic crimes and a PI who specializes in cellular data extraction and wiretapping. Per both of them they said it is incredibly difficult and takes ridiculous equipment and skill to be able to remotely hack a cell phone. Granted, they did say on the scale of difficulty the iPhone was on the easier end, but still said it takes some serious ability to hack without ever being able to physically handle the phone.

I don't doubt you, but how is it any different than hacking a laptop?

Varies. If the phone is connecting to WiFi it really isn't all that different. If the phone stays on carrier then you need the target to download, install and run a malicious app. If the user decides to sync all of the crap on their phone with a cloud service then it comes down to the services security and how strong of a password they used.Schlzm

That makes sense. I think I'm just used to my phone always being on a wifi network.

Makes sense to me too. And I did inquire about this to and got the impression it was still more difficult.

 

[Zow]

Some serious insight:

A couple months ago I got to interview our county's lead detective on electronic crimes and a PI who specializes in cellular data extraction and wiretapping. Per both of them they said it is incredibly difficult and takes ridiculous equipment and skill to be able to remotely hack a cell phone. Granted, they did say on the scale of difficulty the iPhone was on the easier end, but still said it takes some serious ability to hack without ever being able to physically handle the phone.

I don't doubt you, but how is it any different than hacking a laptop?

Varies. If the phone is connecting to WiFi it really isn't all that different. If the phone stays on carrier then you need the target to download, install and run a malicious app. If the user decides to sync all of the crap on their phone with a cloud service then it comes down to the services security and how strong of a password they used.Schlzm

If we can go back to hypotheticals, it's fairly possible that anyone this hypothetically happened to might have had his phone syncing with a hypothetical cloud service.

Please tell me he has it synced with the Firm's cloud service...