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I need help selecting an Engagement Ring (1 Viewer)

EYLive

EYLive

Footballguy
I need some help starting the process on selecting an engagement ring.

I recently began browsing BlueNile and a few online stores to get an idea of price points and what X dollar amount would buy me. I don’t have a budget yet but I’m damn sure I’m not setting it at 3 months’ pay or whatever BS the jewelry industry is pushing on us.

I also know that diamonds are not rare and is basically a marketing ploy to make us feel they are valuable.

My girlfriend is pretty practical, but is still a girl after all. And while she understands my/our money is better spent on a home or traveling, I don’t want her petty friends bashing a modest ring behind our back.

Can my fine fellow FBGs help get me started on what to look for and how not to get scammed?

TIA

P&S - I have already begun hiding money.

 
My advice would be to not care about the clarity ratings and all that BS. If the stone looks good to the naked eye that should be sufficient...nobody's going to be examining your girls ring under a jewelers loop

 
Step 1 is to set the budget. There's no point in seeing what $5k will get you or what $10k will get you if you aren't going to spend more than $3k.

 
Dan Lambskin said:
My advice would be to not care about the clarity ratings and all that BS. If the stone looks good to the naked eye that should be sufficient...nobody's going to be examining your girls ring under a jewelers loop
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This...I basically drew my clarity line where things can be seen with the naked eye. If you can't see it with the naked eye (aka need a loop), I didn't care. Take that $ saved and get better color or size.

ETA: Another tip I got was that if you buy right below the big size numbers, you get more for your buck. i.e. buy just below .75ct, 1.0ct, 1.5ct, etc. So .7ct, .94ct, etc...

 
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Did any of you guys go to a wholesaler instead of a retailer? I feel like I'd get a better deal in the downtown jewelry district as opposed to the standard mall stores.

 
EYLive said:
Did any of you guys go to a wholesaler instead of a retailer? I feel like I'd get a better deal in the downtown jewelry district as opposed to the standard mall stores.
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I'll be completely honest, and some people will probably call me a sucker...I bought from Tiffany's. Two reasons - I found a unique setting I LOVED from there that I wanted and didn't trust a jeweler to reproduce, and secondly, I just trust them and have always enjoyed their service. Sure I paid a premium...but I KNOW my diamond is what I paid for, and I know that I can take it in for cleaning or adjusting free of charge forever.

There can be a surprsing amount of service after the sale on these rings - cleaning, loose settings, etc. Just keep that in mind as wholesalers likely won't help you with that after the sale. I also jsut didn' trust the random places in they NYC diamond district to not scam me...I wouldn't know how to tell the quality without the piece of paper.

 
James Daulton said:
Chocolate diamond. Her gal pals will be oozing jealousy.
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Marketing Guy: "What are we going to do with all these horrible low color graded diamonds? They look brown. Nobody wants a brown diamond"

Marketing Guy #2: "Let's call them 'chocolate diamonds' and tell people this color is actually desireable."

 
Spend $9125. That's a mere 50 cents a day for a 50 year marriage. Certainly you can afford 50 cents to make your gal happy?

or

Go to Swarovski and get her an equally appealing ring for say $300.

 
I used bluenile. Signup at one of the cashback places(like fatwallet) and you can save an extra few percent, every little bit helps on a big purchase like this.

 
True Story: Know a girl that works as waitress at a high end hotel and has a side job as a makeup artist. Probably makes 45-50k a year. Boyfriend who she wants to marry is going to school, and probably makes 20k. She was in a convo with my gf about rings and stuff. This ##### says she expects a ring the price of a car. I said to her, "you mean like the price of a beat up used car, right?" She says, "No, like a low end car. In the $30,000 range." :shock: I told my girlfriend she's ####### nuts and I hope she doesn't feel the same.

 
Long Ball Larry said:
Fat Nick said:
James Daulton said:
Chocolate diamond. Her gal pals will be oozing jealousy.
Click to expand...
Marketing Guy: "What are we going to do with all these horrible low color graded diamonds? They look brown. Nobody wants a brown diamond"

Marketing Guy #2: "Let's call them 'chocolate diamonds' and tell people this color is actually desireable."
Click to expand...
lol at someone who bought any diamond mocking the marketing of diamonds.
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Valid...but you have to draw the line somewhere!

 
Bucky86 said:
It's all about knowing the C's. Cut is the most important and Clarity is second.
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This. A well cut diamond will sparkle more and actually appear bigger than a poorly cut one. No one will be impressed by a huge rock that looks like ####, IMO. FWIW, I bought my wife's ring at Shane Co. Diamond is GIA certified with the # laser engraved. Got both the wedding bands there, too. Very happy with all of it and they'll clean it for free anytime she wants. Additionally, if the stone is ever lost due to the setting malfunctioning, they will replace the stone with as close an equivalent as they can for free. Was not cheap but was not outrageous, either.

 
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Ditkaless Wonders said:
Spend $9125. That's a mere 50 cents a day for a 50 year marriage. Certainly you can afford 50 cents to make your gal happy?

or

Go to Swarovski and get her an equally appealing ring for say $300.
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See, this is the kind of analytical breakdown a dope like me can use. :thumbup:

 
One thing I didn't see mentioned that is kind of a big deal

Make sure you know what but she wants. My wife wanted a radiant cut. Difficult to find. People were trying to push princess and she didnt want that. Get what she wants

I bought from a guy in chinatown who came recommended.

 
The ring my wife wanted was in the case at Trice jewelers marked at $12,750. It was nice, perfect color and clarity and the cut she wanted, and it paired up nicely with the matching wedding ring for $1750.

I offered $6000 if they would throw in the wedding ring, and I wanted it delivered to my address which is in an unincorporated area of the county to avoid the extra 5.5% sales tax in the City. The salesman told me to pack sand. I walked.

That evening I got a call from the "Sales Manager" who said he could do the deal at $8500 and that I should come on in. I told him the cash in my pocket was burning a hole in it and I was thinking of heading out for the weekend, so no thanks. 45 minutes later they had a delivery person at my door with the rings. As it turned out they could do the deal at $6000 after all, because they wanted to support true love. Isn't that sweet.

My wife loves the set. I would have been happier with a crystal ring and a better honeymoon, but whatever, she really got a kick out of showing her ring to her family and friends.

 
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John Bender said:
Do her one better. Buy her a gem for clash of clans.
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I tried to buy her $20 worth of gems for her birthday last month. She said she'd take the gems (her BK is stuck on lvl9) but wanted a real present as well.

I bought her yoga pants.

 
What shape does your GF want? Without knowing your budget, here are my tips:

Buy only a GIA graded stone with report.

Cut is most important of the 4 C's

Best value will usually be in G-H color range with SI1 clarity (eye clean). I-J color can start to show faint yellow.

Flouresence is not a bad thing and will lower the price, as well as make lower color diamonds look whiter.

Round shape is easiest to pick based on paper numbers if you buy online. Fancy shapes like ovals really need to be evaluated in person.

Some diamonds are rare (pink, flawless, etc.) but are super expensive.

Pricescope.com is a great source of information. Like FBG for diamonds.

Lastly, don't get married if you are under 30. Hold out until at least 35 if possible. You will be able to afford a better ring then too.

Good luck!

 
I went sapphire for my wife's ring. I found a setting I liked and went to the diamond district and selected all of stones and they made it in house. I got a MUCH better main stone that way then if I'd shopped for a ready made ring. It's different than all of her friend's rings and it gets a lot of notice. You have to know your woman though! If she wants a diamond, suck it up and get her diamond.

FWIW, I've ordered things from blue nile before and the stones kind of sucked. They were just kind of dull and lifeless so I returned them. I encourage you to go look at stones from a wholesaler just to see what you can get for your money. If you buy from blue nile, you'll have that knowledge to help you evaluate their product vs. what you can get for the same or less money.

 
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EYLive said:
Did any of you guys go to a wholesaler instead of a retailer? I feel like I'd get a better deal in the downtown jewelry district as opposed to the standard mall stores.
Click to expand...
I'm just starting this process myself and earlier today went into a place here on jeweler's row for the first time. Same guy who sold my good buddy his engagement ring. High up in this old building in a very nondescript office.

Depending on if you can get to a wholesaler, find someone who's willing to sit down with you and teach you about everything. This guy walked me through the 4 Cs, basically told me that diamonds aren't rare but DeBeers had f'd the perception up, and that if I can't see a difference myself in some stones that I should probably go with the cheaper one. Super honest and nice and I'll definitely be buying from him.

My gf wants a more classic cut, like emerald or asscher and with that the cut clarity is more important because there aren't as many facets for light to reflect off of. All of the variables come into play depending on the shape, price, etc. Try to get a few basics from your gf or her friends on what she might want and go from there.

 
Thanks for the tips, TwinTurbo. I owe you a "like".

Anyone have thoughts on the synthetic stuff?

 
EYLive said:
Thanks for the tips, TwinTurbo. I owe you a "like".

Anyone have thoughts on the synthetic stuff?
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Get a natural diamond. Go to goodoldgold.com or idjewelry.com. Both are small, reputable, honest dealers that will likely beat blue nile and similar on price for the same stone. In my experience, Blue Nile still marks up 15-20%. And don't be the guy that goes to Jareds or Kay or the mall unless you want to pay double for a lesser ring.
 
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Find a wholesale broker or a jewelry show nearby where you live, or someone who has access to either of those things. If that's the downtown jewelry district option you're considering, I would agree. I'd also be really careful to overspend on something and if your girl knows anything about jewelry she will (a) ask what the hell you're doing and (b) suddenly it will dawn on her it's her money too (soon) so she will want a good investment as well.

About the $ comments, consider it a dowry, that's the world we live in. But if you think about it like an investment and the fact that you can insure it, that part feels better if you get a good price.

 
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Bucky86 said:
True Story: Know a girl that works as waitress at a high end hotel and has a side job as a makeup artist. Probably makes 45-50k a year. Boyfriend who she wants to marry is going to school, and probably makes 20k. She was in a convo with my gf about rings and stuff. This ##### says she expects a ring the price of a car. I said to her, "you mean like the price of a beat up used car, right?" She says, "No, like a low end car. In the $30,000 range." :shock: I told my girlfriend she's ####### nuts and I hope she doesn't feel the same.
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Anyone who is marrying a girl who has this experience should think twice, thrice and a fourth and fifth time as well.

 
SaintsInDome2006 said:
Bucky86 said:
True Story: Know a girl that works as waitress at a high end hotel and has a side job as a makeup artist. Probably makes 45-50k a year. Boyfriend who she wants to marry is going to school, and probably makes 20k. She was in a convo with my gf about rings and stuff. This ##### says she expects a ring the price of a car. I said to her, "you mean like the price of a beat up used car, right?" She says, "No, like a low end car. In the $30,000 range." :shock: I told my girlfriend she's ####### nuts and I hope she doesn't feel the same.
Click to expand...
Anyone who is marrying a girl who has this experience should think twice, thrice and a fourth and fifth time as well.
Click to expand...
Oh I agree 100%. She's also had probably $20,000 worth of plastic surgery/injections done, so that should prob be the first red flag for him.
 
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SaintsInDome2006 said:
Find a wholesale broker or a jewelry show nearby where you live, or someone who has access to either of those things. If that's the downtown jewelry district option you're considering, I would agree. I'd also be really careful to overspend on something and if your girl knows anything about jewelry she will (a) ask what the hell you're doing and (b) suddenly it will dawn on her it's her money too (soon) so she will want a good investment as well.

About the $ comments, consider it a dowry, that's the world we live in. But if you think about it like an investment and the fact that you can insure it, that part feels better if you get a good price.
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An investment??? :lmao:

 
I bought an engagement ring from Blue Nile and was quite satisfied with the experience (aside from the fact that it led me to a short-lived marriage to a complete sociopath). There is no need to pay for a salesman's commission and the rent and upkeep of a brick and mortar jewelry store on top of the cost of the ring.

 
A while before we got an engaged, I stopped in a diamond store with the wife in Grand Cayman. She found a ring that she loved by a designer called Tacori.

I took the model and name and moved along. A year later when ready to get married, I was referred to a ring maker / diamond dealer in the city. I did all of my homework on cut, clarity, size, etc... I then negotiated for a specific diamond at a specific price with a GIA certificate. After we agreed on the diamond, we discussed the ring.

The original Tacori ring had like .5 carat in the setting and was like $7k just for the setting... The ring maker designed a ring identical to the one by Tacori, but almost tripled the diamonds to 1.5 carats in the setting (higher quality as well) and cost me almost half of what Tacori wanted. Name brand designers for jewelry are making huge markups off of name alone. The process from start to finish was about 6 weeks, but well worth it IMO.

Depending on your investment, it is worth doing tons of HW and getting the best deal possible. The best deal will not be found at the mall, that is a guarantee.

 
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