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Is this grounds for a divorce? (1 Viewer)

Leave her?

  • Immediately divorce

    Votes: 4 6.9%

  • Stay with her as likely great in bed

    Votes: 15 25.9%

  • Need to see pics

    Votes: 39 67.2%
  • Total voters
    58
I mentioned this in the lawyer thread the other day.

I had a judge tell me I was trying to turn the defendant into an escape goat.

 
Friend of wife, who's got a #######' doctorate, had a job offer in Phoenix.  When explaining the good news to my wife, she pronounced it - Pa-han-ix.

When wife related the story to me, I asked if it was near Tux-on.

 
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First ever date with my wife....

I am waiting for her to meet me at the place. She is running late and calls me. She explains that she got lost and is running late. So, I try to help her. I ask a few questions and figure out where she is. I tell her "You need to go west" she says that she is. As I am on the phone she says a few things that didn't seem right to me. Finally I ask "Are you sure you are going West?" and she tells me that she is confident she is. Again, she says some things that didn't add up as far as clues to where she was and where she was headed. Finally, since it was very early evening- I asked her "which direction is the Sun?" she replies a little irritated "I told you, I am going West! The Sun is behi.... I am turning around." :lmao:

 
My girlfriend thought Van Halen's "Panama"  was "Burnin Love" until the other day when the title popped up on radio screen.  lol wut

 
Awesome misheard lyrics in here.

My wife has messed up too many to list.  My favorite was when she was talking about the REM song Everybody Hurts:

She was saying something about that REM song that is against suicide, and how some of the lyrics are a little over the top, like the part where the say "Don't blow your head off".

Me:  What part is that?

Her:  You know, the part where they say (singing)  Don't blow your head off!

Me:  Thats "Don't throw your hand"

Her: Oh  :lmao:

 
elguapo07 said:
A few years back when driving with my SIL I said we're going 60mph so we'll be there in about an hour.  Apparently she didn't realize that at a speed of  X miles per hour you will be able to travel X miles in an hour.

No lie, she has an MBA as well.  
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University of Phoenix?

 
coyote5 said:
My girlfriend thought Van Halen's "Panama"  was "Burnin Love" until the other day when the title popped up on radio screen.  lol wut
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Wife thought it was Canada.  

She also thought All the young girls love Alice was all the young girls like violets. 

 
Had a bunch of people at my house years ago watching the Superbowl.  Everyone's talking about the game and my sister asks "What does the QB need a giant watch on his arm for?". 

 
Ministry of Pain said:
My wife didn't understand for the longest time how I gauged with accuracy how far and how long road trips were in Florida which is very easy, they typically have mile markers in coordination with the exits. Example, the mile marker is roughly 109 on the Fl Turnpike which in conjunction is Exit 109 where you get off for our little town. So if you know you are driving to Exit #245 and you are at mile marker 120...doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out you have about 125 miles or 1.5-2 hours depending on traffic or how fast you want to risk it.  She refused to believe me and even laughed at the notion for the longest time, she's not laughing anymore...of course that could be due to a lot of things. 
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But can she estimate the relative size of two pizzas?  That's the real question. 

 
Ministry of Pain said:
My wife didn't understand for the longest time how I gauged with accuracy how far and how long road trips were in Florida which is very easy, they typically have mile markers in coordination with the exits. Example, the mile marker is roughly 109 on the Fl Turnpike which in conjunction is Exit 109 where you get off for our little town. So if you know you are driving to Exit #245 and you are at mile marker 120...doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out you have about 125 miles or 1.5-2 hours depending on traffic or how fast you want to risk it.  She refused to believe me and even laughed at the notion for the longest time, she's not laughing anymore...of course that could be due to a lot of things. 
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You know that's not just a Florida thing, right?

 
Henry Ford said:
I mentioned this in the lawyer thread the other day.

I had a judge tell me I was trying to turn the defendant into an escape goat.
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Did you laugh?

I mean, I am sure it would behoove you not to laugh but I don't think I would have been able to control myself.

 
Wife's cousin wanted to schedule a vasectomy for her husband. She called a vascular surgeons office. They got a pretty big kick out that one.

 
urbanhack said:
in 1997 when I first met my ex-wife she thought a web page was a wet page.

:mellow:
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In 1979 when I first met my ex-wife she had no idea what an aircraft carrier was. None.

(I see a pattern/patterns here, but I'm not sure which I want to take ownership of... :oldunsure: ) 

 
Here's another one for you, after Sept 11th my MIL was afraid to go out because years ago a total stranger said she looked Romanian. My MIL thought that because a total stranger said she looked Romanian that she would be mistaken for a terrorist. Mind you my MIL is an elderly Italian women. 

Yes you read this correctly.  I had to convince her that she was safe.

I have to be in the clubhouse lead for this tread.

 
elbowrm said:
My now wife visited me in my office one afternoon when we were dating.  At the time we were doing a fair amount of business in Canada, so I had a map of North America pinned up next to my computer.  

She looked at the map and said:

"why are they showing Alaska attached to Canada?"
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My wife did this also but she didn't believe it when it was shown on TV so I had to show her on our kids globe.

 
Was playing heads up, recently with wife and son and Dinosaur was the word, son was describing a T-Rex, when the wife said they roamed the earth 2-3 thousand years ago.

I just busted out laughing after I said Dinosaurs but couldn't stop making fun of her, she then goes on to tell me that I should know by now, how bad at geography she is.  I let that one slide, but was laughing on the inside. :D

 
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