FigJam
Footballguy
Oh, you've just forgotten what a screwed up narcissist Woz is because it's been a while since he's got to talk about himself.
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Issue with forward massage therapist (1 Viewer)
- Thread starter Zow
- Start date
(HULK)
(Smash)
Updated:
6: Moderately Obese. Carrying about 25 or so extra pounds. Heaviest guy in the softball outfield, but not too fat to play catcher. Typically the middle ground between being fit and being a Biggest Loser contestant. More locally obese.
Das Boot
Footballguy
You want the ball should roll to the backstop after every pitch?Slow-pitch catcher? Dude.Woz must play first base or catcher.It helps to at least have younger quick guys in the outfield.I always thought softball was meant for old fat guys.Weight is not that much of a hindrance to softball.You're fat and move like Frankenstein... 'Wrong idea' as in connecting jumper cables to the bolts in your neck? And seriously, 25 lbs overweight while doing crossfit and softball (cough, buIIshlt, cough)?WTF. I'm not ashamed of anything. I go for the benefits of flushing out all the lactic acids in my muscles and to be less sore and more flexible. Two weekends again I played 10 softball games in one day after doing cross fit the night before.* Could barely move the next day. Got a massage and just a few days later I was back to blowing up the infielders' feet three days in a row at softball worlds. Massages are great for sports therapy. I wear underwear so the therapist focuses on her business rather than getting the wrong idea.pretty amazing... unless you're ashamed of your body and need to wear undies.Never had a massage.
*####### right that if you're gonna call me out I'm gonna start bringing up my softball ability.
A couple years ago I was one of those fast, young guys in the outfield. This past Worlds, I played catcher.
Hang 10
Footballguy
Dan Lambskin
Footballguy
I stopped at about page 3.5
Woz bang this chick yet?
Woz bang this chick yet?
Zow
Footballguy
Not even close. Apparently I can't even proper bang my wife so we can spit out some fat babies.
The Duff Man
Footballguy
Any softball player should be aware of pinch hitter rules...Zow said:
Gene Sackman
Footballguy
Please don't help. The last thing this planet needs are little Woz's running around.
FUBAR
Footballguy
Zow
Footballguy
Belated update:
About a week ago my wife wakes up and tells me she had a bad dream. Now, unlike me where my dreams are usually not bound by the laws of physics and comprised of purple goblins and such, my wife has realistic, vivid dreams.
Me: You okay? What was your dream about?
Wife: I dreamt [masseuse] came onto you and had sex with you.
Me: Um, yeah that's a terrible and crazy dream.
Wife:
… You haven't been back there have you?
Me: Nope. Haven't even considered it.
Wife: Good.
Needless, no further updates on this.
About a week ago my wife wakes up and tells me she had a bad dream. Now, unlike me where my dreams are usually not bound by the laws of physics and comprised of purple goblins and such, my wife has realistic, vivid dreams.
Me: You okay? What was your dream about?
Wife: I dreamt [masseuse] came onto you and had sex with you.
Me: Um, yeah that's a terrible and crazy dream.
Wife:
… You haven't been back there have you?Me: Nope. Haven't even considered it.
Wife: Good.
Needless, no further updates on this.
Gene Sackman
Footballguy
T Bell
Footballguy
Crazy #####es. All of 'em.Belated update:
About a week ago my wife wakes up and tells me she had a bad dream. Now, unlike me where my dreams are usually not bound by the laws of physics and comprised of purple goblins and such, my wife has realistic, vivid dreams.
Me: You okay? What was your dream about?
Wife: I dreamt [masseuse] came onto you and had sex with you.
Me: Um, yeah that's a terrible and crazy dream.
Wife:
Me: Nope. Haven't even considered it.
Wife: Good.
Needless, no further updates on this.
SaintsInDome2006
Footballguy
Booooo....Zow said:Belated update:
About a week ago my wife wakes up and tells me she had a bad dream. Now, unlike me where my dreams are usually not bound by the laws of physics and comprised of purple goblins and such, my wife has realistic, vivid dreams.
Me: You okay? What was your dream about?
Wife: I dreamt [masseuse] came onto you and had sex with you.
Me: Um, yeah that's a terrible and crazy dream.
Wife:
Me: Nope. Haven't even considered it.
Wife: Good.
Needless, no further updates on this.
{Actually I guess your instincts to stop going were right...}
Zow
Footballguy
Well, to be honest, if I have another marathon softball weekend and wake up Monday morning super sore, something may have to happen. Likely that something is finding someone else to go to, though.Booooo....Zow said:Belated update:
About a week ago my wife wakes up and tells me she had a bad dream. Now, unlike me where my dreams are usually not bound by the laws of physics and comprised of purple goblins and such, my wife has realistic, vivid dreams.
Me: You okay? What was your dream about?
Wife: I dreamt [masseuse] came onto you and had sex with you.
Me: Um, yeah that's a terrible and crazy dream.
Wife:
Me: Nope. Haven't even considered it.
Wife: Good.
Needless, no further updates on this.
{Actually I guess your instincts to stop going were right...}
johnnycakes
Footballguy
It's called a masseur.Well, to be honest, if I have another marathon softball weekend and wake up Monday morning super sore, something may have to happen. Likely that something is finding someone else to go to, though.Booooo....Zow said:Belated update:
About a week ago my wife wakes up and tells me she had a bad dream. Now, unlike me where my dreams are usually not bound by the laws of physics and comprised of purple goblins and such, my wife has realistic, vivid dreams.
Me: You okay? What was your dream about?
Wife: I dreamt [masseuse] came onto you and had sex with you.
Me: Um, yeah that's a terrible and crazy dream.
Wife:
Me: Nope. Haven't even considered it.
Wife: Good.
Needless, no further updates on this.
{Actually I guess your instincts to stop going were right...}
Zow
Footballguy
I'm not four years old. I don't get skid marks.
I'm not ten years old. I don't wear white underwear.
SIDA!
Footballguy
Why not have the wife sit in on the massage treatment with the girl that does you right?Well, to be honest, if I have another marathon softball weekend and wake up Monday morning super sore, something may have to happen. Likely that something is finding someone else to go to, though.Booooo....Zow said:Belated update:
About a week ago my wife wakes up and tells me she had a bad dream. Now, unlike me where my dreams are usually not bound by the laws of physics and comprised of purple goblins and such, my wife has realistic, vivid dreams.
Me: You okay? What was your dream about?
Wife: I dreamt [masseuse] came onto you and had sex with you.
Me: Um, yeah that's a terrible and crazy dream.
Wife:
Me: Nope. Haven't even considered it.
Wife: Good.
Needless, no further updates on this.
{Actually I guess your instincts to stop going were right...}
Quez
Footballguy
A review on rubmaps from a nearby place,
Masseuse Style:
Asian
Hours of Operation:
10am - 11pm
Website:
Table Shower: Yes
Privacy For Shower: Yes
Sauna: No
Jacuzzi: No
Semi-Truck Parking: No
30 min: $50
45 min: $Unknown
60 min: $75
90 min: $105
Address:
10420 N Dale Mabry H
Japanese
25-30
5'5''-6'0''
Brown
Black
Mid Back
C
X
ThickNice & Round?X
X
X
X
X
X
√
X
X√? $30
Amy gives a very good massage. Out of all the Asian girls who have
given me a massage, Amy was the best I ever had. She massages my
### a lot and gets really close to massaging my butt hole. Makes me nearly
cum all over the massage table. She spends plenty of time with the boys and
shaft. Actually sat on the back of my legs for some of it while I was still on my
stomach. After the flip, more massaging and lots of attention to
everything. Gave a good HJ (lot of cum on stomach - then cleaned up well
and hot towels). Finished massage and very good TS after that with
plenty of attention everywhere. Very good toweling off of everything.
When I went back a while later for Apple (she was out sick) and I got Lena instead. She was not good at all. OK massage and but would not recommend her at all. I heard you can get plenty from Apple, but if not satisfied would definitely go back to Amy. She is real nice and has the common sense to know how easy it is to give a good HJ.
Masseuse Style:
Asian
Hours of Operation:
10am - 11pm
Website:
Table Shower: Yes
Privacy For Shower: Yes
Sauna: No
Jacuzzi: No
Semi-Truck Parking: No
30 min: $50
45 min: $Unknown
60 min: $75
90 min: $105
Address:
10420 N Dale Mabry H
Japanese
25-30
5'5''-6'0''
Brown
Black
Mid Back
C
X
ThickNice & Round?X
X
X
X
X
X
√
X
X√? $30
Amy gives a very good massage. Out of all the Asian girls who have
given me a massage, Amy was the best I ever had. She massages my
### a lot and gets really close to massaging my butt hole. Makes me nearly
cum all over the massage table. She spends plenty of time with the boys and
shaft. Actually sat on the back of my legs for some of it while I was still on my
stomach. After the flip, more massaging and lots of attention to
everything. Gave a good HJ (lot of cum on stomach - then cleaned up well
and hot towels). Finished massage and very good TS after that with
plenty of attention everywhere. Very good toweling off of everything.
When I went back a while later for Apple (she was out sick) and I got Lena instead. She was not good at all. OK massage and but would not recommend her at all. I heard you can get plenty from Apple, but if not satisfied would definitely go back to Amy. She is real nice and has the common sense to know how easy it is to give a good HJ.
Last edited by a moderator:
Yankee23Fan
Fair Tax!
So - here is the lesson for all you married guys out there:
Your wife was testing you. And you passed. Her comment about her being ok if you went back there because you need it (the massage, not the happy ending) was a test. She was not going to come right out and say that she feels like she is being attacked in the looks or sexual desire arenas because that would make her look week so she put the ball (no pun) squarely in your court.
Then after that she makes the "if she touches you I will kill her," statement. This is the second part of the test. She wasn't totaly convinced that you passed the first test because you didn't make it abundantly clear that you did and so she had lingering problems with it. Again, though, she wasn't going to come right out and say what she really meant because that isn't what most women do. So she upped the ante on the test.
Now she has a specific dream about you and the massage chick. This was the final part of the test because for whatever reason you didn't, once again, make it clear that you were never seeing this chick again. Your answer now seems to have been enough for her to know you passed the test.
So, she went from making a comment or noticing something and telling you she noticed, to offering that she really didn't care to saying she would kill her to having an "awful dream." That is the mind of a woman. And notice how she never specifically said - do not go to see her again. Just isn't the way they work.
Unless of course you made the whole thing up, in which case, you totally should have nailed the massage chick like I told you to a few pages back.
Your wife was testing you. And you passed. Her comment about her being ok if you went back there because you need it (the massage, not the happy ending) was a test. She was not going to come right out and say that she feels like she is being attacked in the looks or sexual desire arenas because that would make her look week so she put the ball (no pun) squarely in your court.
Then after that she makes the "if she touches you I will kill her," statement. This is the second part of the test. She wasn't totaly convinced that you passed the first test because you didn't make it abundantly clear that you did and so she had lingering problems with it. Again, though, she wasn't going to come right out and say what she really meant because that isn't what most women do. So she upped the ante on the test.
Now she has a specific dream about you and the massage chick. This was the final part of the test because for whatever reason you didn't, once again, make it clear that you were never seeing this chick again. Your answer now seems to have been enough for her to know you passed the test.
So, she went from making a comment or noticing something and telling you she noticed, to offering that she really didn't care to saying she would kill her to having an "awful dream." That is the mind of a woman. And notice how she never specifically said - do not go to see her again. Just isn't the way they work.
Unless of course you made the whole thing up, in which case, you totally should have nailed the massage chick like I told you to a few pages back.
chauncey
Footballguy
Spot on. The shark move would have been to tell her you were going to keep seeing the massage therapist the first time wife tested you. Let her know that Woz is in control and he does what he wants.
Henry Ford
Footballguy
Fine, I'll be the one to ask.Zow said:Belated update:
About a week ago my wife wakes up and tells me she had a bad dream. Now, unlike me where my dreams are usually not bound by the laws of physics and comprised of purple goblins and such, my wife has realistic, vivid dreams.
Me: You okay? What was your dream about?
Wife: I dreamt [masseuse] came onto you and had sex with you.
Me: Um, yeah that's a terrible and crazy dream.
Wife:
Me: Nope. Haven't even considered it.
Wife: Good.
Needless, no further updates on this.
Did you bang the purple goblin?
T Bell
Footballguy
Yes, but only through the pee hole in his boxer briefs so it doesn't count as sex if you're a Mormon.Fine, I'll be the one to ask.Zow said:Belated update:
About a week ago my wife wakes up and tells me she had a bad dream. Now, unlike me where my dreams are usually not bound by the laws of physics and comprised of purple goblins and such, my wife has realistic, vivid dreams.
Me: You okay? What was your dream about?
Wife: I dreamt [masseuse] came onto you and had sex with you.
Me: Um, yeah that's a terrible and crazy dream.
Wife:
Me: Nope. Haven't even considered it.
Wife: Good.
Needless, no further updates on this.
Did you bang the purple goblin?
Zow
Footballguy
It's quite possible. I'm easy in my dreams.Fine, I'll be the one to ask.Zow said:Belated update:
About a week ago my wife wakes up and tells me she had a bad dream. Now, unlike me where my dreams are usually not bound by the laws of physics and comprised of purple goblins and such, my wife has realistic, vivid dreams.
Me: You okay? What was your dream about?
Wife: I dreamt [masseuse] came onto you and had sex with you.
Me: Um, yeah that's a terrible and crazy dream.
Wife:
Me: Nope. Haven't even considered it.
Wife: Good.
Needless, no further updates on this.
Did you bang the purple goblin?
Henry Ford
Footballguy
So you're open to playing with the purple goblin?It's quite possible. I'm easy in my dreams.Fine, I'll be the one to ask.Did you bang the purple goblin?Zow said:Belated update:
About a week ago my wife wakes up and tells me she had a bad dream. Now, unlike me where my dreams are usually not bound by the laws of physics and comprised of purple goblins and such, my wife has realistic, vivid dreams.
Me: You okay? What was your dream about?
Wife: I dreamt [masseuse] came onto you and had sex with you.
Me: Um, yeah that's a terrible and crazy dream.
Wife:
Me: Nope. Haven't even considered it.
Wife: Good.
Needless, no further updates on this.
T Bell
Footballguy
We may be creating new FFA innuendo here.So you're open to playing with the purple goblin?It's quite possible. I'm easy in my dreams.Fine, I'll be the one to ask.Did you bang the purple goblin?Zow said:Belated update:
About a week ago my wife wakes up and tells me she had a bad dream. Now, unlike me where my dreams are usually not bound by the laws of physics and comprised of purple goblins and such, my wife has realistic, vivid dreams.
Me: You okay? What was your dream about?
Wife: I dreamt [masseuse] came onto you and had sex with you.
Me: Um, yeah that's a terrible and crazy dream.
Wife:
Me: Nope. Haven't even considered it.
Wife: Good.
Needless, no further updates on this.
Henry Ford
Footballguy
I've got a purple goblin just thinking about it.We may be creating new FFA innuendo here.So you're open to playing with the purple goblin?It's quite possible. I'm easy in my dreams.Fine, I'll be the one to ask.Did you bang the purple goblin?Zow said:Belated update:
About a week ago my wife wakes up and tells me she had a bad dream. Now, unlike me where my dreams are usually not bound by the laws of physics and comprised of purple goblins and such, my wife has realistic, vivid dreams.
Me: You okay? What was your dream about?
Wife: I dreamt [masseuse] came onto you and had sex with you.
Me: Um, yeah that's a terrible and crazy dream.
Wife:
Me: Nope. Haven't even considered it.
Wife: Good.
Needless, no further updates on this.
Zow
Footballguy
Gobblin' the goblinSo you're open to playing with the purple goblin?It's quite possible. I'm easy in my dreams.Fine, I'll be the one to ask.Did you bang the purple goblin?Zow said:Belated update:
About a week ago my wife wakes up and tells me she had a bad dream. Now, unlike me where my dreams are usually not bound by the laws of physics and comprised of purple goblins and such, my wife has realistic, vivid dreams.
Me: You okay? What was your dream about?
Wife: I dreamt [masseuse] came onto you and had sex with you.
Me: Um, yeah that's a terrible and crazy dream.
Wife:
Me: Nope. Haven't even considered it.
Wife: Good.
Needless, no further updates on this.
gianmarco
Footballguy
Leeroy Jenkins
Footballguy
Do you wear underwear for this portion?
Zow
Footballguy
Update:
My wife is great. I was really sore this week because I was able to get to the gym everyday. So I was rolling out on a foam roller and lacrosse ball. Wife suggests I get a massage. I explain I was going to try to look for a new one but hadn't found one yet. Wife says she's good with me going to old/current one. Threatens to kick my butt if I don't keep my underwear on though.
So, yeah, appointment this afternoon.
My wife is great. I was really sore this week because I was able to get to the gym everyday. So I was rolling out on a foam roller and lacrosse ball. Wife suggests I get a massage. I explain I was going to try to look for a new one but hadn't found one yet. Wife says she's good with me going to old/current one. Threatens to kick my butt if I don't keep my underwear on though.
So, yeah, appointment this afternoon.
right, because threatening domestic violence is great.
Foosball God
Foos
Zow
Footballguy
Something tells me she wasn't serious.
DA RAIDERS
Footballguy
so dumb
Grace Under Pressure
Footballguy
Let her jerk you off already. Pretend you're asleep.
James Daulton
Footballguy
I forget, why did you tell the wife in the first place?
FUBAR
Footballguy
only one way to find out.Something tells me she wasn't serious.
