Living with sig other but sleep in sep rooms (1 Viewer)

[Insein]

I will generally sleep in the guest room. I'm told I snore on occasion plus I go to bed about 4-5 hours after her on typical nights. She's a super light sleeper, so any movement getting into bed and she's up for hours or the day at that point. It's been working well so far.

Sex life with 3 kids under 8 is tricky as is. She's usually never in the mood once it's bed time anyway. It'll usually be a night she stays up later after the kids go to bed. 

 

[Insein]

My grandparents slept in different rooms.  His snoring could literally be heard through the house.

I'd miss the spontaneous romps myself.

The what?

 

[Henry Ford]

The what?

The spontaneous romps with his grandparents.  It’s not for everyone, but I try not to judge. 

 

[matuski]

The what?

The romps, which occur spontaneously.

 

[Binky The Doormat]

The spontaneous romps with his grandparents.  It’s not for everyone, but I try not to judge. 

can't wait till next time.

 

[-OZ-]

My grandparents slept in different rooms.  His snoring could literally be heard through the house.

I'd miss the spontaneous romps myself.

Call me Grandpa. 

Between my snoring and CPAP, her light sleeping, her need to fall sleep with the TV on, my need for it to be off, the fact that we both wake up multiple times each night... We're surviving a lot better sleeping in different rooms.

.

Sex life with 3 kids under 8 is tricky as is. She's usually never in the mood once it's bed time anyway. It'll usually be a night she stays up later after the kids go to bed. 

Yep. 

On the sex front, she gets UTIs way too often after sex anyway, doing it in the shower seems to help. So that's pretty much been out for a while now. Not my preference but I understand her not wanting a UTI. 

 

[Jayrok]

Get two twin beds and put them in the same room.  Leave some space in between.  Wala.

Probably headed for this too.  With us, it isn't about snoring or not wanting to be in bed together... it's all about sleep and in your 50s (late 40s for some) beds treat bodies differently.  She needs a pillow top super soft mattress as she has hip and back pain on occasion.  I prefer a little more firm and can't sleep on a bed that's too soft.  

Looking at getting two twin XLs and she'll get her mattress and I'll get mine.  35 years of marriage and it's okay if you realize you can't sleep on the same mattress as you could in your 30s.  Practical solution.  

 

[Dan Lambskin]

We had a hotel room for a concert on Friday, friend of mine made the reservations for us (comped on points).  We ended up with separate beds

 

[Rodrigo Duterte]

You guys sound like monitor lizards.

 

[CurlyNight]

I don't know how people can be well rested with someone moving, maybe snoring next to them. I'm a light sleeper. So when I was married we did sleep in separate rooms. He snored. It's not a biggie. Once it's lights out sleep time the goal is to sleep so you can function the next day. My hub cared about me not to force the issue because a big part of functioning and health is a good night's sleep.

 

[General Malaise]

My 6 year old daughter wanted next to nothing to do with me for her first 3 years of life.  Then, she turned 4 and we became best buddies.  I read to her every night, then we watch videos on my phone and then she makes me promise I'll come back and stay with her.  So I do.  I have four sons, but man, my daughter has me wrapped around her little finger.

 

[glumpy]

Been getting close with a friend of mine and as a future planning convo went her thought is she can see us living together but thinks separate bedrooms is a key to peace and happiness.  We are both early 50's and have been down the road so we know what's in store if we make a big decision.

What is your take on the idea of living together but not sleeping together?  Curious...

I'll share my thoughts after some replies.

I believe in king size beds. Allows for separation or inspiration as the mood strikes. 

eta: allows room for younger kids should the need arise as well. 

 

[Binky The Doormat]

My 6 year old daughter wanted next to nothing to do with me for her first 3 years of life.  Then, she turned 4 and we became best buddies.  I read to her every night, then we watch videos on my phone and then she makes me promise I'll come back and stay with her.  So I do.  I have four sons, but man, my daughter has me wrapped around her little finger.

lasts till about 14, waiting for it to come back. 

 

[cosjobs]

I sound like a wood chipper when I snore, and I can’t sleep on my side (which is the only thing that stops it) without having my horrible knees swell up to the size of basketballs.  

1-2 time a week we sleep apart and it’s the best sleep I get. 5/5 stars. 

cpap

 

[cosjobs]

If serious - are you making this call based on fantasy football message board posting?  Because that is a rock solid foundation for judging people.

that sounds judgemental

 

[cosjobs]

Just be sure you always have relations in her bed.  That way you don't have to sleep on the wet spot.

They're both over 50. Its not that wet anymore

 

[Henry Ford]

cpap

Been tested.  I don’t have apnea, just horrible horrible snoring. 

 

[cosjobs]

Been tested.  I don’t have apnea, just horrible horrible snoring. 

It works for that, too. Some people cannot do sleep studies. I am one of them. But I did get a machine eventually and it has literally changed my life. Its about impossible to rest well when snoring and a cpap takes care of it.