The Prequel
2004
I’m 28 years old and well into my career, single and no kids. My consulting business is having intermittent success but I still maintain a full-time job. I live in a townhouse I bought at the age of 25 thanks to my first two-month long consulting job which landed in my lap from a combination of preparation and opportunity – or better known as luck.
It’s Friday, a short day due to the Monday holiday so I decide to call my cousin who is also my best friend and life-long partner in crime to get him to come hang out. (aside – My cousin Derek and I are the same age. He tried a semester at college but decided it wasn’t his thing. At the age of 28, he has two kids; one by a girl during high school and another by his ex-living-in-girlfriend. He’s a mess financially; good looking guy but has zero “game”. He’s the type of guy that should pull 8s-10s but ends up with 6s-7s because he waits for girls to talk to him first; we’re exact opposites in almost every aspect but he’s never let me down if I needed him.)
I pick him up and we head to the golf resort for lunch and a few drinks; Derek likes to go to the go to the resort from time to time for drinks because he has this running daydream of meeting a rich older lady. :rollseyes: We walk by the front desk are and Derek notices this chick; young, light-brown skin and a wonderful smile.
Derek: “I bet you lunch that you can’t get her phone number”
Me: “Getting a phone number is high school stuff, I’ll take her out”
Derek: “Yeah right”
Me: “Watch me”
Without hesitating I walk up to the front desk while Derek is languishing in the background trying to overhear our conversation from afar. It’s mid-afternoon so there isn’t much activity at the front desk.
Chick at the front desk: “Hi, welcome to (golf resort). Will you be golfing today?”
Me: “No, I only stopped by for lunch. I’m local so I know better than to get robbed playing golf here”
Chick at the front desk: (laughing) “Well how can I help you?”
Me: “Just a question, how many guys try to hit on you here? It must be annoying, right?”
Chick at the front desk: (giggling more) “Well I work in accounting, I’m just covering for someone but yes, it does happen often and it is a little annoying”
Me: “What’s the worst pick up line you’ve ever heard?”
Chick at the front desk: “Well there have been so many but I guess the worst are the old guys that hit on me. They could be my grandfather!”
Me: “So you do accounting and still willing to subject yourself to this torture. You’re a real trouper. By the way, my name is Ron; my friends call me Arizona (I shake her hand, she tells me her name although it’s on her name tag). Well, I’m not going to bother you any longer. My cousin and I usually hang out at (name of bar) around 9 or so. If you’re around, stop by. Nice talking to you”.
Chick at the front desk: “Nice meeting you”
I walk toward the resort restaurant area, Derek picks up speed and meets up with me:
Derek: “Well?”
Me: “Well what?”
Derek: “Did you get a number?”
Me: “I told you I wasn’t trying to get her number”
Derek: “So you asked her out?”
Me: “No”
Derek: “So you failed?”
Me: “Nope”
Derek: “So what did you do?”
Me: “Patience, my man. Patience”
He hit the restaurant for lunch then spent the rest of the late afternoon at my house playing Madden. About 8pm, Derek and I headed to the bar; same bar I made front desk chick aware of. While we’re still at the bar, guess who walks in:
Derek: (grabbing my shoulder) “Yo, that’s the girls from the resort.”
Me: “I know”
Derek: “I’m going to call her over”
Me: (grabbing his shoulder now) “Don’t”
Derek: “Why?”
Me: “Relax man, try act like you don’t see her”
(chick from the front desk walks over)
Chick at the front desk: “Hey Ron”
Me: “Hey you made it. Can I buy you a drink?”
Chick at the front desk: “I just turned 21 so I really don’t know what to order.”
Me: “I know something you might like”.
We chat it up for a while, meet again several times and begin dating. “Chick at the front desk” will eventually be better known as “Wife”.
Spring 2005
Taking to Derek one day:
Derek: “You and ‘Wifey’ have been pretty serious lately. You got her basically living at your crib now and everything. It’s time to stop messing with the other girls and make her official.”
Me: “I’m not sure I’m the marrying type but we both want a kid and I’m not doing the ‘that’s my baby’s momma’ thing. I’ve already bought a ring; I think I’m going to marry her.”
Derek: “That will be the shortest marriage ever! You’ve cheated on every girl you’ve ever dated. You’re just going to change now??? I seriously doubt it.”
Me: “I don’t know man.”
Summer 2005 and on
Wife and I are currently engaged at this time. My wife is invited to a “Passion Party” from a girl she knows. (aside - a passion party is basically like a jewelry or Tupperware party exempt they sell sex toys.) I’ve never heard of a passion party but after my wife explains it to me, I tell her hell yeah I’ll go. We get to the party, it’s at a house in a upscale part of town; the crowd is mostly people in their 20s and early 30s. The person running the party/selling and describing different toys is a hot lady in her late 30s. There is plenty of alcohol/snacks and each item that’s described brings a round of laughter as it’s passed around the room – the lady running the party has a different story for each item. At one point, I posed for a picture holding the biggest dildo I’ve ever seen with some chick that I just met.
Another items is described as a ‘warming cream’, the party leader invites the ladies to put a little cream on each of their fingers and go into the bathroom to apply it. One by one, the women walk about with their eyes rolling in back of their heads; my wife says to me under her breath: “eww, I’m not doing that”. Her friend, however, convinces her to try it by literally dragging her into the bathroom with her. The attention change to other items and a good 20 mins goes by. It was later that my wife told me that the girl applied it for her and that led to kissing and touching each other. To my knowledge, my wife wasn't into girls before this point.
My wife’s new friend started doing her own parties and we went to every single one; I would flirt with other women and so would she. My wife knew about some of my flirting that went a little further meanwhile I was still hooking up with other chicks. This went on until we were married and my wife got pregnant. After our daughter was born we moved but things started up again when we met a swinger group through a passion party in our new State; my wife tried the ‘other guy’ thing but didn’t enjoy it.